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My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM - Romance - Nairaland

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My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by jambogini: 6:36am On Aug 13, 2012
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Here is a lady who needs help as she is having marital issues.

My name is Tola, I live in Abuja, I have been married for over 6 years with two beautiful kids. My husband before we got married was the best thing ever, flawless, generous to a fault, God fearing, trust worthy and anything a woman would desire. But just into marriage, the lid fell from my eyes I have been deceived and have lived with all his excesses for 6 years now and it is just too late to back out now.

When we got married I began to see his true color, there was no friday he stayed at home he partied out and came back the next day by noon, I can't remember when last I had a date night or and outing with my husband since our honey moon, he Performs his duty regularly, provides enough up keep for the family, provides for the children, sponsor vacations abroad for I and the children excluding himself. He has a heightened sex drive.

I try my best and give it to him anytime he desires it. But it doesn't stop him from cheating on me; he even does it in the open. Other husbands take their wives out for wedding ceremonies; he takes his concubines in place of me in the open even in front of my friends. He has turned me into a house wife and baby making machine and a laughing stock amongst my friends.

The funny thing is that he is a worker in church, he is a Christian. On Sunday, he spends the entire day in church, but asides Sundays, he is a pagan, he sleeps with anythingin skirts, I have cried my eyes out, he flirts with my friends, and he even has them as contact via BBM. Anytime he comes back from business trips, I see packs of condoms in his brief case and his shirt smells of feminine perfumes. The worst still is that he has FOOLS as friends, I cry out every day, I pray and fast but for the past six years it only gets worse.

He and his group of friends (married men)have a BBM group called "RELOADED" where they organise weekend get aways. Organise the latest chick to lay in cheap hotels, plan get together, where they have numerous vulnerable chicks to Bleep, party all night with their concubines, organize random bbm group with many university chicks (married men for that matter)they hook up with this girls, giving silly excuse that they are travelling for business trips.

One of his friends a senior manager in a company on the island recently travelled to kenya with one of his concubines and posts pictures of them having a sex rump, I see this through the bbm group der organised, my husband has no remourse, he lives his fone open and knows I go through it but he doesn't care.

My sister it might sound unbelievable, but many things are happening via social media, twitter, facebook were they hook up with chicks, as old as this men are, they organise private boat cruise trips with a maximum of 12 girls so dat they are surplus. They lodge on a private beach and Bleep the living day light out of them. Unilag, lasu and osu babes.

The worst has happened. I just got discharged from the hospital, I contacted STD via my husband and he feels no remorse. I have had it, I am tired, I want out, this is too much, I need a divorce. Ladun what do I do? I need comments from your blog readers. I cannot take this anymore, my husband bringing diseases to the home. If I suggest he uses a condom on me, he would beat me and accuse me of cheating on him. This men cannot get their eyes off anything in skirts. I noticed his chat with my neighbours daughter, I can’t confront her, he Is sleeping with her and recently took her clubbing.

Ladun please tell me what this girls have that I do not have, is their vagina gold plated or what. I am living in misery, I wish I we're single, I wish I cud cheat on him but am a firm believer in the word. I wish I could turn back the hands of time and dodge meeting him. Please Help!!!
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by Karamy: 7:26am On Aug 13, 2012
jambogini: 0 0

Here is a lady who needs help as she is having marital issues.

My name is Tola, I live in Abuja, I have been married for over 6 years with two beautiful kids. My husband before we got married was the best thing ever, flawless, generous to a fault, God fearing, trust worthy and anything a woman would desire. But just into marriage, the lid fell from my eyes I have been deceived and have lived with all his excesses for 6 years now and it is just too late to back out now.

When we got married I began to see his true color, there was no friday he stayed at home he partied out and came back the next day by noon, I can't remember when last I had a date night or and outing with my husband since our honey moon, he Performs his duty regularly, provides enough up keep for the family, provides for the children, sponsor vacations abroad for I and the children excluding himself. He has a heightened sex drive.

I try my best and give it to him anytime he desires it. But it doesn't stop him from cheating on me; he even does it in the open. Other husbands take their wives out for wedding ceremonies; he takes his concubines in place of me in the open even in front of my friends. He has turned me into a house wife and baby making machine and a laughing stock amongst my friends.

The funny thing is that he is a worker in church, he is a Christian. On Sunday, he spends the entire day in church, but asides Sundays, he is a pagan, he sleeps with anythingin skirts, I have cried my eyes out, he flirts with my friends, and he even has them as contact via BBM. Anytime he comes back from business trips, I see packs of condoms in his brief case and his shirt smells of feminine perfumes. The worst still is that he has FOOLS as friends, I cry out every day, I pray and fast but for the past six years it only gets worse.

He and his group of friends (married men)have a BBM group called "RELOADED" where they organise weekend get aways. Organise the latest chick to lay in cheap hotels, plan get together, where they have numerous vulnerable chicks to Bleep, party all night with their concubines, organize random bbm group with many university chicks (married men for that matter)they hook up with this girls, giving silly excuse that they are travelling for business trips.

One of his friends a senior manager in a company on the island recently travelled to kenya with one of his concubines and posts pictures of them having a sex rump, I see this through the bbm group der organised, my husband has no remourse, he lives his fone open and knows I go through it but he doesn't care.

My sister it might sound unbelievable, but many things are happening via social media, twitter, facebook were they hook up with chicks, as old as this men are, they organise private boat cruise trips with a maximum of 12 girls so dat they are surplus. They lodge on a private beach and Bleep the living day light out of them. Unilag, lasu and osu babes.

The worst has happened. I just got discharged from the hospital, I contacted STD via my husband and he feels no remorse. I have had it, I am tired, I want out, this is too much, I need a divorce. Ladun what do I do? I need comments from your blog readers. I cannot take this anymore, my husband bringing diseases to the home. If I suggest he uses a condom on me, he would beat me and accuse me of cheating on him. This men cannot get their eyes off anything in skirts. I noticed his chat with my neighbours daughter, I can’t confront her, he Is sleeping with her and recently took her clubbing.

Ladun please tell me what this girls have that I do not have, is their vagina gold plated or what. I am living in misery, I wish I we're single, I wish I cud cheat on him but am a firm believer in the word. I wish I could turn back the hands of time and dodge meeting him. Please Help!!!
kip on prayin for him,there is notin God can nt do, divoz is nt d solution probably may be d wost for u.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by bendazum: 7:57am On Aug 13, 2012
Marriage tins...I think someone deserves to get a backseat in church.Expose him for who he is.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by Gloriagee(f): 8:13am On Aug 13, 2012
Isn't marriage becoming the scariest ish ever? sad

Your responsibility IMO is to ur kids first. Pls, get a divorce...at least u'll get some alimony. I'd have suggested a seperation but I doubt paddy would remain financially responsible for his kids under this scenario.

Today, its STD, 2moro it could be AIDS n who'll take care of ur children.

Please, expose ur husband in the church. The level of hypocrisy is sickening. Of course, depending on his financial contribution, they might just turn a deaf ear.

Also, stop referring to those ladies as ur friends, friends ko, friends ni. If they encourage his flirtin with them n sleeping as well, they ain't ur friends!!!!

4 Likes

Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by Kadata(m): 8:20am On Aug 13, 2012
Hmmm- this is when it gets complicated. Does unfaithfulness in Nigerian marriages ever get solved??

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by 2goodbobo(m): 8:32am On Aug 13, 2012
Hmmmmmmmmm. Men will always be Men. One thing is cheating and another is robbing it on your face without shame or respect for you. Why would a church elder like your Husband keep Harem of women? The rate at which infidelity is undermining the once strong pillar of marriage, is so appalling and alarming. You alone is wearing the shoe and you alone knows where it pinches the most. Amidst all, you are left with one choice to make. Is either you stay and hope he changes or you take a walk.
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by 190theclown: 8:36am On Aug 13, 2012
That is wat happens 2 women who use husbands as boyfriends
And boyfriends as husbands, woman if u had looked hard enuf b4 marrying
That skank 6yrs ago then u wud av seen dat in him, oh btw did u say u reside in abuja
Lol - am not :O , there are No faithful men in abuja

Do u knw how many abuja men has snatched my gfs frm me *not 1, not 2, not 20*
When I get married tomorrow too - I would snatch other people's gf, its an abuja cycle of life
Anyway my advice is park ur kids 2 d village and begin farming since house nor let u stay

Its 4 better 4 worse - so bear d worst

5 Likes

Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by tellwisdom: 8:37am On Aug 13, 2012
smh
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by tellwisdom: 8:42am On Aug 13, 2012
Karamy: kip on prayin for him,there is notin God can nt do, divoz is nt d solution probably may be d wost for u.

You be mumu ni?? why quoting this long thread again?? angry angry

5 Likes

Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by cindyrella(f): 9:37am On Aug 13, 2012
Stories like this makes me scared to even think of marriage. cry
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by martyns303(m): 10:22am On Aug 13, 2012
"Reloaded" meyn I need to join that group ASAP. @ poster, I knw ur husband type, trust me he has no intentions of stopping now. 2 things you can do, 1. Look the otherside and pretend ur not seeing it (in ur case tho it will be hard cos he's flunting it to ur face), u may want to endure for the sake of ur children cos if u leave, he'll flex and 4get abt u and the kids. Or 2. You just damn him and walk away, be a tough woman.

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by ednut1(m): 10:39am On Aug 13, 2012
Dis woman deserves what she is getting, instead of knwin ur BF well, u spend d whole time think of gettin him married, now u have it, reality noni
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by soledadd: 10:40am On Aug 13, 2012
So pathetic. Pray harder this is the devil at work.
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by Rich4god(m): 10:40am On Aug 13, 2012
Seriously, if you have something doing that can comfortably take care of you and your kids, then just back out... You may end up having high blood pressure and you know the implication of that.

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by soledadd: 10:43am On Aug 13, 2012
ednut1: Dis woman deserves what she is getting, instead of knwin ur BF well, u spend d whole time think of gettin him married, now u have it, reality noni
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by lekzey(m): 10:43am On Aug 13, 2012
Firstly, which church do u attend.I will not advice to divorce ur husband. What you need is to organise intercession prayer to deal with the spirit that make him fornicate.

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by Taitaiwo: 10:47am On Aug 13, 2012
You better stay in that marriage, in as much as he cares for you and your kids. Trust me, no good guy out there. If you dare divorce him somebody else wld take your space. He doesn't have anything to loose, pray and advice him often. He will change.

5 Likes

Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by Clemzy16(m): 10:47am On Aug 13, 2012
@op Your hubby has fools has friends just as you have fools as friend. Likewise, no reasonable friend of yours will be flirting with your husband. Whether on mobile or not. However, You'll never get to know your real friends if you don't get rid of the fake ones.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by Nobody: 10:48am On Aug 13, 2012
Karamy: kip on prayin for him,there is notin God can nt do, divoz is nt d solution probably may be d wost for u.
_
Must you quote?
@OP, what the girls have that you don't are stretch marks from pregnancy, two nagging kids, and a ring on their fingers.
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by soledadd: 10:48am On Aug 13, 2012
[quote author=soledadd][/quote] the woman needs advice and not blames. Do you think you can predict human behaviour? Dont you know that human beings change with life situations. If you dont have anything to say just pass.

5 Likes

Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by Nobody: 10:49am On Aug 13, 2012
Op, you are a good writer. Why do I have this believe that the guy is catching up with the fun he missed in his youth yuppie days at Uni.

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by Clemzy16(m): 10:49am On Aug 13, 2012
martyns303: "Reloaded" meyn I need to join that group ASAP. @ poster, I knw ur husband type, trust me he has no intentions of stopping now. 2 things you can do, 1. Look the otherside and pretend ur not seeing it (in ur case tho it will be hard cos he's flunting it to ur face), u may want to endure for the sake of ur children cos if u leave, he'll flex and 4get abt u and the kids. Or 2. You just damn him and walk away, be a tough woman.
me too o! I also have a page on facebook called "Clemy Reloaded." enough flirting Tinz jooo..
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by Lordave: 10:51am On Aug 13, 2012
jambogini: 0 0

Here is a lady who needs help as she is having marital issues.

My name is Tola, I live in Abuja, I have been married for over 6 years with two beautiful kids. My husband before we got married was the best thing ever, flawless, generous to a fault, God fearing, trust worthy and anything a woman would desire. But just into marriage, the lid fell from my eyes I have been deceived and have lived with all his excesses for 6 years now and it is just too late to back out now.

When we got married I began to see his true color, there was no friday he stayed at home he partied out and came back the next day by noon, I can't remember when last I had a date night or and outing with my husband since our honey moon, he Performs his duty regularly, provides enough up keep for the family, provides for the children, sponsor vacations abroad for I and the children excluding himself. He has a heightened sex drive.

I try my best and give it to him anytime he desires it. But it doesn't stop him from cheating on me; he even does it in the open. Other husbands take their wives out for wedding ceremonies; he takes his concubines in place of me in the open even in front of my friends. He has turned me into a house wife and baby making machine and a laughing stock amongst my friends.

The funny thing is that he is a worker in church, he is a Christian. On Sunday, he spends the entire day in church, but asides Sundays, he is a pagan, he sleeps with anythingin skirts, I have cried my eyes out, he flirts with my friends, and he even has them as contact via BBM. Anytime he comes back from business trips, I see packs of condoms in his brief case and his shirt smells of feminine perfumes. The worst still is that he has FOOLS as friends, I cry out every day, I pray and fast but for the past six years it only gets worse.

He and his group of friends (married men)have a BBM group called "RELOADED" where they organise weekend get aways. Organise the latest chick to lay in cheap hotels, plan get together, where they have numerous vulnerable chicks to Bleep, party all night with their concubines, organize random bbm group with many university chicks (married men for that matter)they hook up with this girls, giving silly excuse that they are travelling for business trips.

One of his friends a senior manager in a company on the island recently travelled to kenya with one of his concubines and posts pictures of them having a sex rump, I see this through the bbm group der organised, my husband has no remourse, he lives his fone open and knows I go through it but he doesn't care.

My sister it might sound unbelievable, but many things are happening via social media, twitter, facebook were they hook up with chicks, as old as this men are, they organise private boat cruise trips with a maximum of 12 girls so dat they are surplus. They lodge on a private beach and Bleep the living day light out of them. Unilag, lasu and osu babes.

The worst has happened. I just got discharged from the hospital, I contacted STD via my husband and he feels no remorse. I have had it, I am tired, I want out, this is too much, I need a divorce. Ladun what do I do? I need comments from your blog readers. I cannot take this anymore, my husband bringing diseases to the home. If I suggest he uses a condom on me, he would beat me and accuse me of cheating on him. This men cannot get their eyes off anything in skirts. I noticed his chat with my neighbours daughter, I can’t confront her, he Is sleeping with her and recently took her clubbing.

Ladun please tell me what this girls have that I do not have, is their vagina gold plated or what. I am living in misery, I wish I we're single, I wish I cud cheat on him but am a firm believer in the word. I wish I could turn back the hands of time and dodge meeting him. Please Help!!!
just opt out.
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by ebamma(m): 10:52am On Aug 13, 2012
sex is an art not a science,have you been trying new sex skills with him,those girls he sleeps with may be teaching him new and exciting sex skills,just be patient with him and try exploring new sexual tactics with him
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by phraze(m): 10:53am On Aug 13, 2012
don't fight it and by the way who is 'laden', hope dis wasn't copied from a blogg?? cos the poster kept refering to laden. Anyways if i were you i would gather enough cash and just run-away with my kids. Go to the south, forget him. The man is enjoyin himself let him enjoy until he remembers he never involved his wife in the enjoyment.
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by segzicres(m): 10:53am On Aug 13, 2012
Ppl that r telling her to pray r jus annoying! Prayer alone won't solve her problem.......she needs to take actions n pray for GOD to support them.......there is no hope for this marriage.......better start ur life again.....there's always a 2nd chance
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by mhozzis(m): 10:59am On Aug 13, 2012
Who is LADUN please.
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by Nobody: 11:03am On Aug 13, 2012
Maybe when he had nothing, you use him rob then. Now he has, he is flexing his muscles and asking u "what can you do now?". You see, you just have to live with it, their is nothing to kill that adrenal rush except u castigate his sexual hormones. You still have long way to go lady... Your decision would be based on what your family and his family will conclude on. So that if you do anything, you already have people supporting u. But for now OYO
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by Nobody: 11:05am On Aug 13, 2012
Mstchew!... Sounds too bad to be true...u must be a senseless lady to let this happen for so long,and come to dis forum to tell us ur superstory
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by budusky77: 11:05am On Aug 13, 2012
The funny thing is that he is a worker in church, he is a Christian. On Sunday, he spends the entire day in church, but asides Sundays, he is a pagan, he sleeps with anythingin skirts, I have cried my eyes out, he flirts with my friends, and he even has them as contact via BBM. Anytime he comes back from business trips, I see packs of condoms in his brief case and his shirt smells of feminine perfumes. The worst still is that he has FOOLS as friends, I cry out every day, I pray and fast but for the past six years it only gets worse.

The worst has happened. I just got discharged from the hospital, I contacted STD via my husband and he feels no remorse. I have had it, I am tired, I want out, this is too much, I need a divorce. Ladun what do I do? I need comments from your blog readers. I cannot take this anymore, my husband bringing diseases to the home. If I suggest he uses a condom on me, he would beat me and accuse me of cheating on him. This men cannot get their eyes off anything in skirts.
My question is what kind of church does he attend, And why do you have such friends, and what kind of friends do you have that are STD positive, am beginning to suspect fowl play here.
Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by suolboy(m): 11:06am On Aug 13, 2012
First of all, the poster says her husband is a worker in the church and not an elder. I will also say such type of men are killing the gospel. but for the poster, i will only say u can't run away from the present situation, try to jet a job if u don't have one so that u will be busy and make ur own money. Also try discussing it with ur pastor about ur husband's life style.
My advise for girls and boys is that don't rush into marriage. I always say I can't court a girl less than two yrs and study her very well both when she comes to my place and when i go to her place. Also study the friends of ur intended spouse.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Flirts With My Friends And Have Them As Contacts On BBM by Bluediamond1(f): 11:06am On Aug 13, 2012
Dis is d height of it all.Lets get it straight,am gonna b realistic wit u,am not yet married though bt 1thin i alwys tel my galfrnds who r is dat;dont eva be of d notion dat ur husband can neva cheat on u.u say so coz he kips it away frm u,but wia he throws it right in ur face,my dear dats d limit.i've seen pastors n deacons cheat so pls 4gt dat church worker thing.tnk God u already av 2kids,pls back out.its not a do or die affair.who says 4better 4worse?den wait until he brings u AIDS or beta stil Hepatitis,d silent killer...

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