gabbytabby:

My motor never start a fight you can never win she is going to stop the habit of a life time? All of his family have allowed it or been forced to allow it due to financial dependence and small you want to start a war that you know can cause problems in your family. Just make sure you and your hubby are not living in his house and your problems are solved with FIL its easy when you go over greet him and retire to where the MIL is he really is not your problem.

I am just giving her a choice. Obviously its bothering her enough to post about it. If so, make the wimp of a husband do something about it, or else bell the cat yourself. Life is too short to allow some cranky FIL take a dump on your peace anytime he chooses.

KILL AM NAH>>>>>>>

Rat poison to the rescue or better still put super glues on his lips while he is sleeping.

gbokukueba: @IfeLuvely

I totally understand how you feel as that is exactly how my wife feels about my father at the moment. Like a lot of people have said it lies with your husband to liberate himself just as am doing at the moment and have told my wife to no longer pick his call or call him after he told her he was going to beat me when i return to the country soon... can you beat that? Some fathers need to know where their place in life is and if they refuse avoidance is the best approach...

If the OP married to a Yoruba man, this your advise may not be the best. The honor for a father is life time, you can avoid him if he is a troube maker, but u cannot rude or insult him except u hv d information that he is not your father, u will definately not want anybody to place a curse on you. God gave parent those spiritual power when you over step your boundary with them. When you have a difficult father, the worst you can do is to manage him and pray for him. God did not give us any power to insult or rude to them in anyway.
The husband here is not the problem, the father inlaw is the problem. The behavious of some fathers are embarashing to their children the sameway it is to the outside, but according to our culture, you don't tell your father to shutup no matter the temptation because you will never pray to get d same reward from your own child.

Hallelujah, after reading sooo many replies on here, i thought I was just being over emotional n being too sensitive, but i can now finally conclude that I am not, because the first son's wife and the 3rd son's wife just called me to complain about the same issue...phew...thanks for all the advice, i have taken the good ones

IfeLuvely: Hallelujah, after reading sooo many replies on here, i thought I was just being over emotional n being too sensitive, but i can now finally conclude that I am not, because the first son's wife and the 3rd son's wife just called me to complain about the same issue...phew...thanks for all the advice, i have taken the good ones

Would you update us on status?

IfeLuvely:
@ mowire, they just keep quiet(and then gossip about it behind him), cos apparently if they don't he will refuse to pay their school fees or will not give the wife any money. the way i was brought up in my own family, my father is a respecter of all n doesnt just talk anyhow to people, so that annoys me that the wife n the other kids cannot defend themselves cos they are solely dependent on him financialy, but since me n my hubby are not depending on him wetin be his problem?

An example of what happened: he sed i hadnt call him, i sed sorry I was at work and being so busy with work (at least we have bills to pay nau) he got angry and started teling me how much do i earn that i am feeling like somebody...

Nah wah your own na Father In law.. Wetin person no go see for marriage sef...Pele dear

Lexusgs430:


Would you update us on status?

Update I now ignore.... cannot be bothered with people like that...

IfeLuvely:


Update I now ignore.... cannot be bothered with people like that...

Wow, Welcome back. it took you a whole 4 years to reply. LOLZ
Hope you have found a palatable coping mechanism that suits all ?

Lexusgs430:


Wow, Welcome back. it took you a whole 4 years to reply. LOLZ
Hope you have found a palatable coping mechanism that suits all ?

LOL... Life took over...being a wife, mother, Work and education took over. I definitely found a coping mechanism... Pray to God, do my best for my nuclear family and the family I came from, every other person especially the annoying ones are irrelevant...

IfeLuvely:


LOL... Life took over...being a wife, mother, Work and education took over. I definitely found a coping mechanism... Pray to God, do my best for my nuclear family and the family I came from, every other person especially the annoying ones are irrelevant...

Thats the best solution. We care for those who equally care about us and ignore all others.
Have a lovely week ahead.

maclatunji:


Lady, you have the wrong attitude. He is in a position of authority over you. He may be overbearing but your current attitude will not help your situation, it will only make it worse. Call him every 2 weeks and visit him with gifts and smiles once a month.

Your relationship will improve and you will have learnt to tolerate his excesses. It is all part of being a good wife to handle such issues maturely.

Word!!!

IfeLuvely:
I know i probably should not say this as a repectful person, but I cannot contain it any longer as my FIL gets on my last nerves, he really winds me up. His manner of talking and behaviour gets on my last tits, and I feel he is the one running our family instead of my hubby. The man is soo pompous,rude and obnoxious. I knew this before i got married to my hubby but i tought I could handle it, but I cant. I have been trying to ignore him, but i think my hubby is suspecting that something is up, please any advice on how to deal with such people. The man talks just anyhow...the other day he was telling a grown man that he will slap him, i dont get how some people are like this ooo...

hello madam. you opened this thread in 2012 thats like 10 years ago. And some how in 2022 you have made me to be able to sort some of my dads medical bills.
i hope you see this message one day

IfeLuvely:
I know i probably should not say this as a repectful person, but I cannot contain it any longer as my FIL gets on my last nerves, he really winds me up. His manner of talking and behaviour gets on my last tits, and I feel he is the one running our family instead of my hubby. The man is soo pompous,rude and obnoxious. I knew this before i got married to my hubby but i tought I could handle it, but I cant. I have been trying to ignore him, but i think my hubby is suspecting that something is up, please any advice on how to deal with such people. The man talks just anyhow...the other day he was telling a grown man that he will slap him, i dont get how some people are like this ooo...

Just bear am. Shey na old man? He will pass away in a not too distant future and your home will have peace.