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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria (7293 Views)
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If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by Darey00(m): 8:40am On Oct 31, 2012 |
NAIJA IS SO BLESSED What would happen in Nigeria if we are to experience an hurricane like the US East Coast is currently going through Hurricane Sandy? (GOD FORBID) Imagine say a 'HURRICANE AKPORS' is heading for Naija in 3 weeks.. First and foremost; 1. Pastor for church go prophesy the hurricane. 2. The State Governors will hold a press conference advicing the people of the states to remain calm as government is working hard to see how they can tackle the situation. 3. National Emergency Management Agency (NEMA) will grant an interview on Channels TV and AIT saying that they are well trained and prepared to handle the crisis.That they are on top of the Situation. 4. The Federal Government will wait for the Hurricane to first land and wipe out Statesthen; - Hold a day of National Mourning and Prayers and order the flag be flown at half mast. - Visit the disaster location for a first hand assessment of the damage. - Visit the survivors camp and share relief material (Mosquito nets, rice and Indomie) - Set up a committee to investigate the Hurricane andsee how we can prevent future hurricanes from visiting Nigeria. - Release billions of Naira (on Paper) for disaster management. - Sack the Minister of Water Resources for failing to contain the water. - Commend the State Governors, NEMA, Red Crossand other emergency services unit for their quick response. 5. The Senate will hold an emergency session and condemn the 'Hurricane'. 6. Churches around Nigeria will hold crusades and Programmes with Titles like 'May Hurricane wipe out your enemies'.. 'Calming the Hurricanes in your life'.. 'Finding the Rainbow in your Hurricane'.. e.t.c.. 7. M.I Abaga will release a single about hurricanes. 8. Femi Falana (SAN) will sue the Hurricane, F.G and State government for their poor handling of the Hurricane. 9. CPC, ACN, APGA and otherswill blame the PDP and Jonathan for the Hurricane. 10. BOKO HARAM will claim responsibility for the Hurricane and will promise more hurricane if governmentdoes not comply. 11. Many People will change their Blackberry Display Pictures to 'Hurricane Pictures' and Facebook status will read..Hurricane Things.. GOD BLESS NIGERIA 29 Likes |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by Nobody: 6:05pm On Oct 31, 2012 |
Would be great if it affects the Aso Rock only lol . Lucky enough, my residential home wasn't affected by the storm! Not even close! |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by Franasoan(f): 8:53am On Nov 01, 2012 |
Aki and pawpaw will grow taller 1 Like |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by ektbear: 9:48am On Nov 01, 2012 |
lol |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by SamMilla1(m): 9:49am On Nov 01, 2012 |
Obama will be named the president of Nigeria and Washington Dc will be named the Nigerian Capital |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by Rooneyboy(m): 9:50am On Nov 01, 2012 |
if it happens its effect is something I refuse to thin about. Enough casualties go dey. |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by Afam4eva(m): 9:52am On Nov 01, 2012 |
I curled this from Okija Juju's post Okija_juju: [b]Imagine say a 'Hurricane Abimbola' is heading for Ekiti State in 3 weeks.. First and foremost; 1 Like |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by eduson55(m): 9:54am On Nov 01, 2012 |
WHAT DO YOU EXPECT..? IF THEY PREDICT ITS TOMORROW ,ALL OUR GOVERNMENT WILL DO IS TO DECREASE THE PRICE OF COFFIN SO THAT ALL CAN AFFORD. THEN OUR REPORTERS WILL BE REPORTING FROM GHANA''eeem as you can see some people have been killed, hey bro,did you see how it happened?'' [size=18pt] WHICH WAY NIGERIA?[/size] 1 Like |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by yvonne4(f): 9:56am On Nov 01, 2012 |
May God forbid it!!!!!!!!!!! |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by acidtalk: 9:56am On Nov 01, 2012 |
I declare every wind of Hurricane Sandy to Aso Rock, the 36 government houses and the National and State House of Assembly. May the wind and havock not affect the Average and Poor man in the society because they neither have money to go for Medical threatment in Germany nor House to relocate to in Dubai. |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by megxo(m): 9:58am On Nov 01, 2012 |
dat is y its an 'if' statement |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by Okijajuju1(m): 9:59am On Nov 01, 2012 |
NNA SEE PLAGERISM!!! I need to start copyright protecting my shiit!! Na so I see one of my Nairaland posts on Tontoh Dike song as person DP!! Repackaged and even signed!! 3 Likes |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by Nobody: 10:01am On Nov 01, 2012 |
I don't know what will happen to Nigeria....but the chances of existence of Nigeria after the disaster would be SLIM |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by Nobody: 10:02am On Nov 01, 2012 |
Plagiarism at its worst! People have ceased to be creative! Go to facebook, dsame jokes, same quotes, same updates, different people! |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by PrinceDudu(m): 10:03am On Nov 01, 2012 |
afam4eva: I curled this from Okija Juju's post what is okija juju's problem with Ekiti state, abi na only Ekiti state horicane go fit hit |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by Nobody: 10:04am On Nov 01, 2012 |
If Hurricane Sandy were to happen in Nigeria...Nigerians would blame the govt. and hurl insults at Jona for his incompetence in stopping the natural disaster from happening |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by Nobody: 10:06am On Nov 01, 2012 |
It won't be called 'Hurricane Sandy' in Nigeria, but 'Hurricane Chioma' 2 Likes |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by rodeo0070(m): 10:06am On Nov 01, 2012 |
Kai... If Hurricane go happen, the price of Garri will definitely be affected... |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by Okijajuju1(m): 10:07am On Nov 01, 2012 |
Imanuelle: Plagiarism at its worst! Nwokem, obu mua de this joke na Nairaland!! Even Afam has quoted the original.. Na wah o!! |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by EzePromoe: 10:09am On Nov 01, 2012 |
I pity people wey dey experience power failure for the first time for that USA, dem go think say dem don go blind. 1 Like |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by acidtalk: 10:11am On Nov 01, 2012 |
After I saw this thread, I put a call through to the President to find out his plans to curtail such in Nigeria. Acidtalk - Your Excellency sir, Goddday. Jonathan - Yes, What can I do for you? Acidtalk - Just called to greet you your Excellency. Jonathan - Don't greet me Acidtalk. I see your comments about me and my government so don't act like you like me. Acidtalk - Sir, I am only stating the obvious truth. Jonathan - Now what can I do for you? Acidtalk - What steps are you taking to avoid an occurence of Hurricane Sandy in Nigeria? Jonathan - Well, as you can see, it will have no effect on us. Acidtalk - Who are the us? Jonathan - Me, Babangida, AbdulSalam, Obasanjo, Danjuma and others. Acidtalk - What do you mean sir? Jonathan - We all reside on Hilltop. 50-120feet above ground level so no way the water can get to us in our hilltops. Acidtalk - What of the common man sir? Jonathan - What else will they expect us to do than to setup relief and rehabilitation camps. Tell Aki and Pawpaw, Genevieve, Don Jazzy, Tiwa Savage, Dr Sid, Obesere, Pasuman, Daddy Showkey and others to visit them. We will also send few bags of rice, salt, cartons of indomie and soap to them. Acidtalk - And? Jonathan - And what? Of course in no time they will forget their predicament especially when we tell them we have Setup several committees to look at the causes of the hurricane. We will setup committess to go to Heaven to find out why it happend, Committee to go to hell to do its own findings, Committee to discover how much profit we can make in the reconstruction and others. Acidtalk - Is that all sir? Jonathan - What else do you want to hear? Okay I and the 36 state governors will relocate our offices for that period to the Bahamas. Acidtalk - Hmmm!!!! Jonathan - Hmmm your head. Una never start. 12 Likes |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by EzePromoe: 10:11am On Nov 01, 2012 |
Okija_juju: Ewuoooh! I feel your pains. |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by Nobody: 10:12am On Nov 01, 2012 |
The death toll would be massive. The destruction will be horrendous. The after effects will be unmentionable. Hurricane Sandy was massive affecting an area of about 800 miles. If it were to hit Nigeria how many places will remain unscathed. That could be the end of Nigeria as we know it. 1 Like |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by PeeDaVinci: 10:17am On Nov 01, 2012 |
every pastor in the churches will preach about signs of end times ,and cite the hurricane as an example |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by mdbissalla(m): 10:19am On Nov 01, 2012 |
@ OP, hw wil u describe d massive flood dat hits various towns n villages of dis country. virtually all d states were affected some are still living in flood wit little or no help. isnt dis disaster a hurricane? or is it because we dont hav much grammer to hav named it better dan flood... 1 Like |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by LordBabs(m): 10:20am On Nov 01, 2012 |
Trust naija religionists, they'd say the gods are pi$$ed off... |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by stacomaster(m): 10:29am On Nov 01, 2012 |
Pls Darey Whats Hurricane Sandy?? |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by stacomaster(m): 10:31am On Nov 01, 2012 |
Pls Wats Hurricame Sandy?? |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by daywatcher: 10:33am On Nov 01, 2012 |
as long as the hurricane is given a name from my tribe |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by Ariyke: 10:36am On Nov 01, 2012 |
kunletiwoo: It won't be called 'Hurricane Sandy' in Nigeria, but 'Hurricane Chioma'Or Hurricane kunletiwoo |
Re: If Hurricane Sandy Were To Happen In Nigeria by Nobody: 10:37am On Nov 01, 2012 |
How I wish an hurricane can sweep me,and my family to Yankee. I go like am men! |
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