fromuk:

Red_Lips

if u don't care u will not be writting with vexation, from your post you are not happy, be a goog girl and somebody wil bring liquor to your family. Gaskiya.

Speak English. Vexation isnt even a word. Who's vexed anyway? I wrote out my opinion. I just think it's lame that people are making up excuses for themselves because some dorks decide to go home for wives. again, who cares?

and what the hell is a "goog" girl? Is that a new breed of women? Btw I'm taken so please comot from my face.

uyai:

Most of the guys who go back are taxi drivers and mental health workers who do three jobs to survive. A guy like that is intimated by well made young girl who is making more than he does by just having one job. They go back home and spread their hard earned dollars knowing very well that the girls will jump up on any dollar bill.

My other uncle went to nigeria and did this very big high class state of the art weddding to this very tall 'sand beautiful out of the world woman. SHE WAS SHOCKED WHEN SHE GOT HERE. Not only were they living with in one room, they were living in his sister house married to my uncle above. can you imagine that.

Most of the time it has to do with self worth. A lot proffesional nigerians marry here. It mostly those mental health workers and taxi drivers who go back home at least from what i've seen and heard.

Lol. I've seen a few cases like that myself. A cab driver wont get a wife here but he'll definitely get one after showing off a few George Washingtons in Nigeria then pretends that it's cos there are no good girls aboard. hahhaa

quote author=fromuk link=topic=11142.msg1089726#msg1089726 date=1178220473]
Red_Lips

if u don't care u will not be writting with vexation, from your post you are not happy, be a goog girl and somebody wil bring liquor to your family. Gaskiya.
[quote][/quote]

fromuk right on the money.

@ Red Lips u one angry, blistered b----

wonder who stole ur heart? is it the tinman?

why didnt you just type the word out? oponu.

It's amazing how much i tend to piss people off with my mere opinions. yet Im the one who's "vexed"?

ko le to 'yen now . . .there was no call for the insult

take my advice and save up on some good karma so that when u go and come back again. . .

ziddy:

ko le to 'yen now . . .there was no call for the insult

who's the one that started by more or less calling me a bitch for stating an opinion?

Seriously, go bother someone else.

Thanks.

uyai:

Most of the guys who go back are taxi drivers and mental health workers who do three jobs to survive. A guy like that is intimated by well made young girl who is making more than he does by just having one job. They go back home and spread their hard earned dollars knowing very well that the girls will jump up on any dollar bill.

My uncle imported one like that, now not only did the woman openly cheat on him, he was jailed for laying a finger on her. Now she has the house and the kids while he pays child support.

My other uncle went to nigeria and did this very big high class state of the art weddding to this very tall 'sand beautiful out of the world woman. SHE WAS SHOCKED WHEN SHE GOT HERE. Not only were they living with in one room, they were living in his sister house married to my uncle above. can you imagine that.

Most of the time it has to do with self worth. A lot proffesional nigerians marry here. It mostly those mental health workers and taxi drivers who go back home at least from what i've seen and heard.

lol,the mental health worker part.

Even our naija women are beginning to buy wedding gowns and go home,marry a man and bring him over so the women are beginning to do same.

I know a girl that quit her high paying job in Lagos to marry this Nigerian in Texas only to find out on arrival the guy was a squatter in someones apartment and delivered pizza for a living.

babyosisi:

I know a girl that quit her high paying job in Lagos to marry this Nigerian in Texas only to find out on arrival the guy was a squatter in someones apartment and delivered pizza for a living.

davidylan:

Might I add that the marriage ended in less than 2 years and the man imported and married another girl few months after the divorce was final.

all i have to say is that, it depends on the guys motive. If he goes back home to marry a girl bcuz he thinks he can overpower the babe or bcuz he wants a submissive wife, some one he can control or 4 wateva reason in that line of thought if u get my drift, then he will be in 4 a big shock bcuz, when those ladies get here they will definitely (100%) be affected by the culture, no doubt about it and they will change one way or the other.

But when u marry a girl here, wat u see is wat u get kindoff and there is no room 4 shock or dissapointments if u did ur homework well.

Unlike wit going home to get married, no matter how good the girl is, culture change is inevitable.

If u disagree, ask those who went home to get married, they will tell you. I am not saying that the girls start running wild, all i am saying is that there will defintely be a change in behavior.

peace.

@Fromuk
Red_Lips is a good lady from her response
I ll bring liquor 2 her family

It got nothing to do with Naija women, all African women in the west want to be like Janet jackson, whitney houstney,celin dion, all the stars in the USA, tell me how many stars have been a good wife to their husbands? so no man in his right senses wants them as a wife. I will advice you girls to also come home and pick your husband, take him to the states and then control him as those white girls want to control their husbands.

Your men comes home and pick a good wife, you girls should also come home and pick a good husband, is simple.

Echidime:

It got nothing to do with Naija women, all African women in the west want to be like Janet jackson, whitney houstney,celin dion, all the stars in the USA, tell me how many stars have been a good wife to their husbands? so no man in his right senses wants them as a wife. I will advice you girls to also come home and pick your husband, take him to the states and then control him as those white girls want to control their husbands.

Your men comes home and pick a good wife, you girls should also come home and pick a good husband, is simple.

Echidime,say what?
where in the world did you get that stereotype?
Marriage is not slavery,there is no need for a woman to control a man and a man better not try to control a woman.
Women are not maniacs that ought to be chained down and controlled.

Every good woman ought to love,honor and respect her husband and every good husband owes her same.

uyai

I have 2 uncles medical doctors they came back to 9ja to marry their wives and they are still leaving peacefully.

Red_Lips
I no say u be prof for yanky, u still d vex be a good gyl and i will introduce you to many 9ja guys in yanky. If things work well may be the give ur people some liquor for ur head.

fromuk:

uyai

I have 2 uncles medical doctors they came back to Nigeria to marry their wives and they are still leaving peacefully.

only the man and woman concerned can make that claim.

davidylan

marriage is for better for worst, she supose dey happy say she marry many d wey d look for many yrs now no way. Men no plenty like women so make she follow am squat may she go start to deliver her onw kebab or chicken and chips.

uyai
at least we never hear so we no go asume

fromuk:

uyai
at least we never hear so we no go asume

I'm sure you meant to address me,na true.

Nairalanders interesting thread. No comment.

Keep your yahoo yahoo contacts to yourself, fromuk. Again, pele but Im taken

osisi Im not surprised at all about that pizza story but why any woman would just agree to marry someone without knowing his entire story. pitiful.

Hmm.
I actually did ask her the same question,the man said he was a graduate working on his masters degree,she believed him.
He came home carried wine,her people drank and gave their daughters hand in marriage.
The girls was a little desperate to leave naija at that time though,she was an only child and had just lost her mother and here came a prince and swept her off her feet.

The pizza delivery was not as bad as sharing an apartment as a squatter with a new wife.

last time I heard of her she was with a white man,lol.

figured her high paying Lagos job would have had her travel on her own in due time.

The man was so down and out that this girl paid for her own ticket to America.

for better for?,  that is marriage. accept it or don't, if she cannot stay with the pizza guy believe me if she marry an oil guy and unfortunatly things gets a twist she will not cope as well that is gyls for u. allways wanting comfort when half of them can never work out comfortability for themselves.
redlips i believe if u see a yahoo guy you go rush am like say you are from russia, dey dia 22yrs if you no minus something from yor real age,before u know it na 30 you go d hit by that time na hotmail or google guys u go find like british visa.

Someone translate fromuk's words to English for me, please

Thanks.

All i got was "blah blah english visa". Not sure why I would want an English visa.

Redlips
maybe u are not a nigerian if you are you will understand my english mixed with pigin.

Great Question; Great thread.

Most times, people like myself just go through threads and then learn without replying cause what happens afterwards leaves you imagining if all is well with everybody. Threads begin well and then degenerates into fights and quarrels that is why I like keeping put most times. But on this, I will like to contribute.

To begin with, marriage is a thing of choice and no one is to blame another for making a mistake or for making the best out of it. So one can marry to a girl in diaspora or a girl in Nigeria. The choice is yours and likewise the chics too.

1, Where you marry and when you marry depends on what you want in life.
2, There have been cases of women married back home and brought abroad who misbehaved.
3, There are chics married back home who still misbehaved

Therefore it is relative and there is no yardstick for measurement.

But I guess the question in this thread arose 'cause maybe many went home and married. MAN IS A PRODUCT OF HIS ENVIRONMENT. In contributing on this therefore, most Nigerian chics abroad tend to imbibe the cultures of thier host countries so much that they now feel it is the best. And they call this independence and women emancipation, forgetting the values for a good family which is held in high esteem in our land back home. Soomeone on this thread wuoted the bible and said FOR TWO SHALL BECOME ONE and said it is a 50-50 thing. I will like to point out to the person that in God's punishment to Eve in Genesis 3:16, He told that I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conceptio; and in sorrow thou shall bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, AND HE SHALL RULE OVER THEE. Most girls in diaspora fail to know this and consider men equals. This explains why the divorce rate is high over here.

It doesnt have anything to do with the man's job. Taxi driversand mental health workers dont mean much but having good homes. The girls in diaspora have same responsibilities with guys here as thier families back home worry them for support just as they do to the men too. So diaspora is just about hussling to make it and be big.

Another thing depends on if you want to live in diaspora for long. Some guys want to go home and some feel they have arrived in diaspora and so home? Only when they feel like.

90% of Nigerian girls in diaspora are hussling as you are doing. They all want to meet thier needs back home.

Many still marry in diaspora and are living well and many are not. Same goes for guys that marry back home.

There is also the cultural and traditional angle to it: If you always think home, then know that in most clans and homes back home, you are not married until your people marry with you.

PS. I ONLY AIRED MY OPINION. YOU MAY NOT LIKE IT BUT PLEASE NO INSULTS. I WILL TAKE IT YOU ARE BEREFT AND INTELLECTUALLY AND ARGUMENTATIVELY LOW IF YOU INSULT. I WILL RESPECT YOUR OWN OPINION; SUPPORT OR OTHERWISE TO THIS

Its not really just about good and bad attitudes. I think the more salient issue is that for some strange reason, African girls tend to be deeply influenced by the western culture, and tend to loose their roots, thus incompatibility issues then arise.

Nigerian girls come over her, and suddenly start going to rock concerts, listning to indie music, joining environmental protests, buying guitars, going rock climbing, reading Bacon, and a host of other strange things.

This simply doesnt happen to Nigerian guys for some reason.

abegee!am free for any girl from obodo oyibo to marry ooooooh!i would pass for handsome and tall too.i dont mind jare.lol!

my advice for those in diaspora is that they should never make the mistake of going back home to marry,,,a friend of mine made this mistake and he is living to regret the action.I also know of a guy in texas who married a babe from naija,,this lady got to US,went to school to study nursing,eventually she started dating other black americans even after 2 kids.At the end,her husband was beaten up by these american guys,,and this hangered the guy who now as a result frustration killed the lady in question.
Nigeria has changed dramatically if you want to marry either in US or Naija,pls first thing is to use your head! Don't marry a girl because you think she can be morally upright cos she is from African,don't marry a girl cos you think she was well brought up,,there is more to marriage tha all those.Whether diaspora or Naija babes, there is no guarantee!