slimyem: All i require to be a submissive wife is that my husband respects me as much as i respect him....and all will be well!!

You r wrong lady,....submission in marriage for a woman has no requirement. Just be submissive to him,shikena! Even if he were a womanizer,an alcoholic,a abusive husband,an irresponsible guy etc,....just submit to him

Please marriage is not for any lady who cant submit. If you know you cant submit, please remain single and save us this high rate of divorce. There is no progressive institution that does not have a leader, marriage is not different. It is just that many women because of feminism and lesbianism finds it difficult to accept their husbands authority. They will accept thier bosses authority, they will accept thier parents authority but when it comes to their husband feminism sets in.The foolishness and reprobacy of these end times is responsible for all these! People will intentionally question the scripture because they dont want to obey it. Any chritian woman who does not submit to her husband is living in egotism and arrogance and is puffed up by her achievements or knowledge. Feminism or women liberation are for lost souls and reprobate minds.Submission for a woman is a sign of strenghts not weakness and carries unusual blessings. Abrahams wife in the Bible called him Lord. How many of our self acclaimed so called morden liberated women can do that? Remember that rebelion is as the sin of withccraft, that why we have so many witches this days! My wifes submission to me brings out my best for her. Truly, theres is nothing I cant do for that woman, including laying down my life for her.

***i know say na woman go start this thread****
Quadruple mtcheewww!
OP submit means exactly it says...SUBMIT! Submission. Submissive. Submissivity. U wan spark a lousy feminist argument, eeediot
***clicks the SUBMIT button on NL page ***

dinachi: Please marriage is not for any lady who cant submit. If you know you cant submit, please remain single and save us this high rate of divorce. There is no progressive institution that does not have a leader, marriage is not different. It is just that many women because of feminism and lesbianism finds it difficult to accept their husbands authority. They will accept thier bosses authority, they will accept thier parents authority but when it comes to their husband feminism sets in.The foolishness and reprobacy of these end times is responsible for all these! People will intentionally question the scripture because they dont want to obey it. Any chritian woman who does not submit to her husband is living in egotism and arrogance and is puffed up by her achievements or knowledge. Feminism or women liberation are for lost souls and reprobate minds.Submission for a woman is a sign of strenghts not weakness and carries unusual blessings. Abrahams wife in the Bible called him Lord. How many of our self acclaimed so called morden liberated women can do that? Remember that rebelion is as the sin of withccraft, that why we have so many witches this days! My wifes submission to me brings out my best for her. Truly, theres is nothing I cant do for that woman, including laying down my life for her.

STRAIGHT OUT OF MY BUCCAL CAVITY!!! Tell them!!
Madam feminist, wanna know where rebellion lands you? Ask Lucifer!
Come, bros, do you want to contest for president in 2015? I will donate my house as your campaign headquarters!

all4naija: Lol... It beats my imagination when submission as a tool by men to do what they like is now seen as being a measure of responsibility on the side of the women by some posters here. Jeez! To be submissive means to give up and accept to be belittled in this present generation. There are working women who earn more than men.

The part in bold is most times the reason why this sort of debate pops up. Money is not everything. It is also not authority (or power if you like), simply, it is weak power. Economic success may buy you many things, but it won't buy you love, respect and/or submission.

On the other hand, power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely. It is unfortunate that we have men who prefer extremities and misuse authority or the privilege of submission given to them by God through their partners. It is also deplorable that we are debating scrapping leadership positions because some folks without people skills abuse them. Oribibe ko logun orififo!

The present society is beyond mere village characters our forefather were used to.For example a man can wish to marry many wives as he wishes(mostly in our African society) and have affairs outside of marriage sometimes without it being pronounced as a bad thing.

lol @ village character. Polygamy is an issue for another day. Scratch that! No sane person justifies cheating.

The pilot-co-pilot relationship IMHO defines what a marriage should be.

Key: The man = Pilot, The Wife = Co-pilot, Marriage = Aircraft, flying, flight etc.

Pilots depend on copilots to share flying duties.

Always sitting right next to their pilot, copilots, also known as flight officers, assist the captain and play a crucial role in navigating a safe ride. Duties involve a little of everything from pre-flight planning to landing the aircraft. While the main concern is making the pilot's job easier it also means maximizing the pilot's level of situational awareness. No copilot's job is simple.

Flying an aircraft is a particularly demanding job and the captain cannot do it alone. The pilot will often instruct the copilot to monitor the flight instruments regularly. This allows the flight crew to proficiently meet all of the demands of flying by multi-tasking as a team. Altitude indicator, altimeter, airspeed indicator and horizontal situation indicator are examples of the flight instruments a copilot will be asked to monitor. The copilot will not only have to monitor but also operate flight instruments and controls.

Before a flight takes off, the copilot and pilot will have determined who flies and who takes on the other flight responsibilities. If the copilot is in charge of flying, then knowing the take off and arrival procedures is imperative. The copilot will already know the weight, balance, and if the airplane is loaded properly. Basically, the copilot will memorize the ins and outs of the craft, which is vital to the big picture in commandeering any type of aircraft ...

http://www.ehow.com/m/info_8112079_duties-copilot.html

This is what I know and want in marriage-- roles, gender roles. Where is Kandiikane?

Frankie9ice:

You r wrong lady,....submission in marriage for a woman has no requirement. Just be submissive to him,shikena! Even if he were a womanizer,an alcoholic,a abusive husband,an irresponsible guy etc,....just submit to him

This is a joke...right?

Would love to believe this coogar, but obviously I'm sure this is not the one I know very well.
The coogar I know fores his opinion on everybody even when they are unfounded or go against the grain or norm
Then he insults everybody with every name possible.

How can he be married?
Unless his wife was bethroted to him from birth.

coogar:

very good question.....
my headship is actually a matter of responsibility and accountability - this is where african men generally screw things up. in sane climes, the head serves his subjects, in africa, the head wants to be served. accepting my authority means she cannot resist my will. this does not mean she cannot express her fears or disagree with some of my decisions...she's my helper not a doormat!

It better to do it in African way bcuz western world encourages divorce

Compare divorce rate in african and oyinbo marriage

Why are people always argueing over this issue?
Women that do not believe in biblical submission should look for the few men who share such sentiments and get married to them,or better still stay single.
Marriage is not for everybody,it comes with prices and sacrifices.

Nashville:

So do you believe in equality in marriage? Do you think it can really work? Two captains in a ship? Two CEOs in one organisation? Two Presidents for one country? Two governors for one state? Tell me how it works, I am listening!! Or you may let your wife be the leader when you get married

and where was it stated in the Bible that a husband and wife re not equal? a subordinate doesn't submit. submission is a choice n not a duty.

50calibre:

You seem to be championing the course of ignorant women who don't know their role in their quest for equality with men.

I am just laughing at you, I really hope you do get what you see i.e a really stubborn woman who will really put this your belief and theory to the test.

I only pity women who are mislead by your advise, because they will only have themselves to blame by the time they are in their 50s and single or divorced.

Foolish women get carried away by this so called male-
female equality cr*p being pushed by feminists who advise women to be rebellious to their husbands all in the name of equality whereas they themselves go home and submit whole heartedly to their husbands.

It has been proven time and time again that in any marriage where a woman doesn't want to submit to her husband doesn't last. Just look at marriages of old, and look at the modern marriages, the stats speaks for it self.

So many divorces with children left in the custody of the woman who fails to train and instruct the children right, they grow up and end up being failures.

Yet people won't learn

speak for yourself d quality of life u want to live. if u want a glorified slave, go to d slave market and let us have peace. some wise men know wat it means to be leaders in their homes and enjoy d benefits. i don't know if you re a co-creator wit God that u know men n women re not equal. if u re a christian, please read your bible and pray for understandin from God. if u're not, don't expect your wife to submit cos it's a biblical concept.

@all the wanabe feminists, why will you submit to your boss, but not your husband? Why will you submit to your parents but not your husband? Only foolish women argue about submission. Every wise woman understands that submission dosent degrade but it elevates. You stoop to conquer! Any woman who argues about submision to the husband is suffering from the demon of pride, and remember it is pride that kept satan where he is today.Marriage is a CHOICE! If you are too proud and dont want to submit , then dont marry. Remain single and leave married folks out of your satanic wisdom. Dont join the new age movement in destroying one of the greatest institutions that God made. Finally,God resists the proud but gives grace to the humble! Submission is a sign of humility.If you are not humble as a woman , then marriage is not for you.If you want to make all your choices without any input, fine and good, just dont marry! You cannot eat your cake and have it. You want to be married, then learn submission , you dont want to submit then dont marry!

Mowire:
I agree with you on this. The man should know that being head means the buck stops @ his table. Even if the wife decides to "help him" bear bear the blame.

please help me tell them!

some ladies have read wide yet they have shallow knowledge of the concept 'submission', should i call that western brainwash.
what some of our ladies learn from western education is gender equality- which can never be,any earthly principle against laid down divine principle is bound to fail.
did Adam not tell Eve of d forbidden fruit,yet she disobeyed as a result of wanting to be independent.
during decision making,make ur points known wt humility,if ur husband agrees,gud,if nt,same noni

dinachi: Please marriage is not for any lady who cant submit. If you know you cant submit, please remain single and save us this high rate of divorce. There is no progressive institution that does not have a leader, marriage is not different. It is just that many women because of feminism and lesbianism finds it difficult to accept their husbands authority. They will accept thier bosses authority, they will accept thier parents authority but when it comes to their husband feminism sets in.The foolishness and reprobacy of these end times is responsible for all these! People will intentionally question the scripture because they dont want to obey it. Any chritian woman who does not submit to her husband is living in egotism and arrogance and is puffed up by her achievements or knowledge. Feminism or women liberation are for lost souls and reprobate minds.Submission for a woman is a sign of strenghts not weakness and carries unusual blessings. Abrahams wife in the Bible called him Lord. How many of our self acclaimed so called morden liberated women can do that? Remember that rebelion is as the sin of withccraft, that why we have so many witches this days! My wifes submission to me brings out my best for her. Truly, theres is nothing I cant do for that woman, including laying down my life for her.

...well said

fellis: @all4naija, great job man.

This is the dictionary meaning of the word 'submit'; I don't understand the strange definitions the people on this thread are giving to the word:
sub·mit [səb mít]
(past and past participle sub·mit·ted, present participle sub·mit·ting, 3rd person present singular sub·mits)
verb
v. sub·mit·ted, sub·mit·ting, sub·mits
v.tr.
1. To yield or surrender (oneself) to the will or authority of another.
2. To subject to a condition or process.
OR
1. To give in to the authority, power, or desires of another.
2. To allow oneself to be subjected to something.

All the descriptive verbs in those definitions ( to give in, to yield, to surrender, to be subjected) imply something that is forced, something that is not gotten via any type of diplomacy.

I see people on this thread advocating submission because the Bible says so. The Bible also says that women should not speak in church and should always cover their hair therein (Corinthians) yet we don't see any women advocating things like this in this day and age and there are countless women preaching in churches and having their own ministries.
The truth is that times have changed.
We are no longer in the era where men were the sole bread winners and so had the most say on how the money they earned for the family should be spent. Another thing is that women are more exposed these days, there is hardly any sphere in society where you don't see women doing the exact same thing men do, their lives are no longer strictly restricted to taking care of the house and children, they get the same education men get and get practically the same exposure as men. Yet they are supposed to just shove all that knowledge and experience under the carpet and submit to another person when it comes to making decisions. Submission made more sense back then in those days when women did little outside the home and didn't have the exposure/knowledge men had.

Any marriage will last and be a happy one when BOTH parties are happy. Not when one party is 'surrendering' or 'subjected' constantly to the will of the other.

One unfortunate thing about this submission issue is that a lot of men look at laws in the Bible about submission of women in marriages and conclude, based on these laws that they must be superior to women and women exist only to be subjected to men. This is what has led to many sexist attitudes that pervade our society today. Also, a lot of callous men are taking advantage of the submission thing to trample on the rights of women and to treat them badly in marriages. And in spite of this bad treatment a lot of women will stay put in their housed and not complain/resist simply because they see the husband as the one who knows best.

I understand that men will resist any thing will cause them to cease being the head of the family. It is not easy to give up a privileged role, one that puts you in charge of others, gives you the final say, makes you superior etc. It is not easy to give up such a role and so the men will advocate submission.

....who is this person, wise sayings from u...u r recognized

Hi-Dee:


Guy, you must be a dictator or at least, have that tendency of being one. If I were a lady, I go run from guy like you... I advise you change that 'selfish' attitude.

Hi-Dee, thank you. I thought I was the only one thinking that way.

fellis: @all4naija, great job man.

This is the dictionary meaning of the word 'submit'; I don't understand the strange definitions the people on this thread are giving to the word:
sub·mit [səb mít]
(past and past participle sub·mit·ted, present participle sub·mit·ting, 3rd person present singular sub·mits)
verb
v. sub·mit·ted, sub·mit·ting, sub·mits
v.tr.
1. To yield or surrender (oneself) to the will or authority of another.
2. To subject to a condition or process.
OR
1. To give in to the authority, power, or desires of another.
2. To allow oneself to be subjected to something.

All the descriptive verbs in those definitions ( to give in, to yield, to surrender, to be subjected) imply something that is forced, something that is not gotten via any type of diplomacy.

I see people on this thread advocating submission because the Bible says so. The Bible also says that women should not speak in church and should always cover their hair therein (Corinthians) yet we don't see any women advocating things like this in this day and age and there are countless women preaching in churches and having their own ministries.
The truth is that times have changed.
We are no longer in the era where men were the sole bread winners and so had the most say on how the money they earned for the family should be spent. Another thing is that women are more exposed these days, there is hardly any sphere in society where you don't see women doing the exact same thing men do, their lives are no longer strictly restricted to taking care of the house and children, they get the same education men get and get practically the same exposure as men. Yet they are supposed to just shove all that knowledge and experience under the carpet and submit to another person when it comes to making decisions. Submission made more sense back then in those days when women did little outside the home and didn't have the exposure/knowledge men had.

Any marriage will last and be a happy one when BOTH parties are happy. Not when one party is 'surrendering' or 'subjected' constantly to the will of the other.

One unfortunate thing about this submission issue is that a lot of men look at laws in the Bible about submission of women in marriages and conclude, based on these laws that they must be superior to women and women exist only to be subjected to men. This is what has led to many sexist attitudes that pervade our society today. Also, a lot of callous men are taking advantage of the submission thing to trample on the rights of women and to treat them badly in marriages. And in spite of this bad treatment a lot of women will stay put in their housed and not complain/resist simply because they see the husband as the one who knows best.

I understand that men will resist any thing will cause them to cease being the head of the family. It is not easy to give up a privileged role, one that puts you in charge of others, gives you the final say, makes you superior etc. It is not easy to give up such a role and so the men will advocate submission.

This is the best contribution ever.

Men should realize times have changed...

And for any marriage to be successful, there must be Respect and Agreement on all relevant issues as it were.

Tobiegal:

This is the best contribution ever.

Men should realize times have changed...

And for any marriage to be successful, there must be Respect and Agreement on all relevant issues as it were.

how can that be the best contribution so far?
fellis took too much emphasis on the word "submit" and went straight to the oxford dictionary. the fact is these laws were written in a different language and a lot of meanings get lost in translation. "submission" in that context is not "forced" otherwise it would be a blatant "obedience".........doing something whether you are happy or unhappy is just obedience. submission in the biblical sense is what you are happy at doing...if you are not happy, then it's not submission.

coogar:

how can that be the best contribution so far?
fellis took too much emphasis on the word "submit" and went straight to the oxford dictionary. the fact is these laws were written in a different language and a lot of meanings get lost in translation. "submission" in that context is not "forced" otherwise it would be a blatant "obedience".........doing something whether you are happy or unhappy is just obedience. submission in the biblical sense is what you are happy at doing...if you are not happy, then it's not submission.

This is rich.
So the words in the Bible have their own special definitions?
So we are not supposed to apply the English meanings of the words in the Bible when reading it even if the Bible was written in English ?
Wonderful.

fellis:
This is rich.
So the words in the Bible have their own special definitions?
So we are not supposed to apply the English meanings of the words in the Bible when reading it even if the Bible was written in English ?
Wonderful.

the bible was originally written in aramaic before getting translated to english language. most of these words are not the direct translations - just the closest available in english language.

Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
5:23For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
5:24Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing


Women are told to regard their husbands as Christians(the church) regard Christ.
Infact two word are used in those verses; Submit and Subject. Those verses don't sound like they are telling the woman to do the husband the favour of submitting to him

But whatevs, you can give it your own interpretation; a lot of Christians do that anyway.

fellis:
Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
5:23For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
5:24Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing


Women are told to regard their husbands as Christians(the church) regard Christ.
Infact two word are used in those verses; Submit and Subject. Those verses don't sound like they are telling the woman to do the husband the favour of submitting to him

But whatevs, you can give it your own interpretation; a lot of Christians do that anyway.

so are christians "forced" to worship God or they do it willingly? can you now see the word "submit" as explained in the dictionary is not the direct translation but the closest english word to the aramaic version of the word?

coogar:

of course, men cannot always be right.....and when he is wrong, the partner should come to his aid. she is expected to work with her partner to put things right and minimize the consequences rather than using them to prove a point or as an excuse for rejecting him in some way. a man who has a submissive wife acquires a greater sense of self respect because he knows that she respects his authority in her life and she is not in any way trying to belittle him.



if a man already knows the woman he's married to is smarter than him, there won't be any argument. for instance, i am a quack in the kitchen - it's not possible for me to argue at what point should salt or pepper be added to a pot of stew. it's not my forte so whatever my wife decides to do won't be contested by me - she's superior in that field....same principle applies if the subject is my area of my specialisation!




marriage is not a competiton.....it's a journey undertaken by the husband and the wife in which they have to take decisions on which road to take at every junction in their journey. there's going to be a time when the couple would desire taking different roads - this is where mutual respect is expected to kick in. if there's love between them, they would work it out between themselves which road to take. if they both decide on road 1, then road 1 it must be regardless of what the outcome is. they would either succeed together or fail together.......there's no shame in that!

Did someone steal your log in details....I find myself nodding to all you wrote on this topic.

Luxythere:
Did someone steal your log in details....I find myself nodding to all you wrote on this topic.

you stole it.......

coogar:

so are christians "forced" to worship God or they do it willingly? can you now see the word "submit" as explained in the dictionary is not the direct translation but the closest english word to the aramaic version of the word?

lol, Christians are forced to worship God now. It's either you worship God or face eternity in hell. How is that not forced?

I read a book on submitting "Fascinating womanhood" Helen Andelin.

Its a step by step on how to be a female in a marriage

fellis:
lol, Christians are forced to worship God now. It's either you worship God or face eternity in hell. How is that not forced?

you are not forced to worship God - it's a choice! you either take it or leave it. "submission" is also a choice, a woman either buys it or not. it's a free will otherwise it would be called oppression! if the bible says submit to your husband as you submit to God then there's no force......which renders your literal meaning of submission as null and void....

Luxythere: I read a book on submitting "Fascinating womanhood" Helen Andelin.
Its a step by step on how to be a female in a marriage

are you male or female?

coogar:

you are not forced to worship God - it's a choice! you either take it or leave it. "submission" is also a choice, a woman either buys it or not. it's a free will otherwise it would be called oppression! if the bible says submit to your husband as you submit to God then there's no force

Let's not kid ourselves.
It is forced.
It's either the woman submits according to the dictates of the Bible or face punishment from God for disobeying His commands/committing sins.

fellis:
Let's not kid ourselves.
It is forced.
It's either the woman submits according to the dictates of the Bible or face punishment from God for disobeying His commands/committing sins.

if submission is "forced" then every christian woman should be practising it in their homes, no? think about it - it's a privilege given to a loving and respectful husband by a wife. she cannot be forced to render it, it should be earned!

coogar:

if submission is "forced" then every christian woman should be practising it in their homes, no? think about it - it's a privilege given to a loving and respectful husband by a wife. she cannot be forced to render it, it should be earned!

This context has been posted here gazillion times ...I really don't know why people like to chug down people's throat .....una well done o cooger your attention is needed elsewhere , this thread has ran it's course

jidegirl12:
This context has been posted here gazillion times ...I really don't know why people like to chug down people's throat .....una well done o cooger your attention is needed elsewhere , this thread has ran it's course

where?