coogar:

don't mind the hypocrites....
all of them would grow up to become wicked mother inlaws - the new breed are actually worse with their sons. are these not the same women who follow their sons to school to slap the teachers who disciplined their sons? siddon there dey look - in the next 20 yrs, someone would come here to ridicule babyosisi and sisikill for dragging pot of stew with their daughters-in laws.

Hahahahaha
My children already know I may stay in a hotel and operate from there to do omugwo
I like my space and don't like staying in people's homes
I am a good predictor of moods and if I smell any tension,I don go be that
The mothers in law of my generation will not be the type described here
We will go there with our high heels ,jeans ,the latest hair do and rent correct car park for driveway
Any pim from Son or daughter in law,I will give them waka on their individual faces and drive off
I won't be that kind of MIL that will pack and occupy space
Not my portion IJMN

stillwater:

Nope, not happy.

why are you not happy? Haven't I assured you of her peace of mind, what else do you want me to do?

2sexy:

Whether married or not, my life wouldnt be much different... okay, my wife wouldnt have to deal with any of this because her MIL wouldn't be available. so I guess you are rest assured that my wife will live peacefully okay? Are you happy now?

Ma friend, what you doing here! Talking about MIL you never had yet! As a future petroleum Engineer, pray you marry a old wife, if not, if you get those offshore job of one month on and off. She go hear whim for your wife hand.

stillwater:
I know it's still a rude shock to you that the mama that gave you bre.ast to suck is not utterly blameless.
Me too, I'm in awe when reality suddenly hits me.

whoever said mothers are blameless...
of course, she's not perfect - no one is! however, i would rather deal with her imperfections myself, my wife is not in any position to deal with such just like i cannot deal with the imperfections of her mother! if my mum offends my wife, i expect my wife to tell me so i can speak to my mum about it......that's the way things should be done!

babyosisi:


Hahahahaha
My children already know I may stay in a hotel and operate from there to do omugwo
I like my space and don't like staying in people's homes
I am a good predictor of moods and if I smell any tension,I don go be that
The mothers in law of my generation will not be the type described here
We will go there with our high heels ,jeans ,the latest hair do and rent correct car park for driveway
Any pim from Son or daughter in law,I will give them waka on their individual faces and drive off
I won't be that kind of MIL that will pack and occupy space
Not my portion IJMN

LOl . . . reminds me of my friend's mum, who did her omugwuo from her office, via e-mail and phone calls!

Who has time for Omugwo when you never complete your work load for the year. wetin you go tell Oga Governor wey give you political appointment for Abuja? Say you waka go Umuahia for Omugwo . . . go and come back na, if your replacement won't welcome you!

You know Oga coogar likes arguing blindly!

Ujujoan:

LOl . . . reminds me of my friend's mum, who did her omugwuo from her office, via e-mail and phone calls!

Who has time for Omugwo when you never complete your work load for the year. wetin you go tell Oga Governor wey give you political appointment for Abuja? Say you waka go Umuahia for Omugwo . . . go and come back na, if your replacement won't welcome you!

You know Oga coogar likes arguing blindly!

while you love arguing deafly and dumbly.....

coogar:

while you love arguing deafly and dumbly.....

Sheeesh!

Sapele_Don: Could not help but throw this in before leaving for work.

Strange as it sounds,this story really bothered me all through the night in a way I still can't place my hands on.

Men should be very careful about who they make their wives.

From some of the commentaries I have been reading from some of the females here I am assuming (A) they are either not married (B) divorced and happy to cheer another woman towards a divorce (C) simply to young to know the definition of MARRIAGE and everything it encompasses.

Just imagine a commentator saying after telling the husband and mother inlaw her feelings and nothing is done,she will explode.

I read that line and looked at my family across the breakfast table and cannot but bless God for my family.

Just celebrated my eleventh(11th) year wedding annivesary and so can semi-authoritatively talk about marriages,the intrigues and the behind the scene not too pleasant happenings.

Has my marriage been perfect?no.

Who is the chief culprit?me.

I had three weddings(church,registry,traditional)andat all the weddings,the same sermon was preached to my wife by the people joining us in our holy matrimony.

And that is KNOW now that by getting married to him,you are also getting married to his FAMILY and the wife should not only consider herself to be a WIFE but also a DAUGHTER.

Again let's go back to the posters narrative.

She got tired of her mothers inlaw constant complaints?but she could also be your mom,and I am sure your mom sometime while growing up complained about somethings you did.

Did you get FED up with your mother and start throwing a fit?

Wives comes and goes, but mothers will be the same and until you realize that mothers will always be in their son's life permanently,then you will keep having problems in your marriage.

Again,this brings me to the question of what kind of marriages people get into this days.

A marriage based on love and mutual respect not just for each other,but by extension to the extended family will always stand the test of time.[b][/b]

Apparently the posters husband's did not see this fiery part of her before making her a wife,as no man will sanely make a woman a WIFE that with total disregard to decorum,start insulting HIS MOTHER in his presence then use the work place stress as an excuse.

For the SINGLE men reading this. Please and please know the kind of woman you want to make a wife.

In this case the husband willingly or unwillingly got married to this woman,so should deal with the consequences.

spot on!

Ujujoan:

LOl . . . reminds me of my friend's mum, who did her omugwuo from her office, via e-mail and phone calls!

Who has time for Omugwo when you never complete your work load for the year. wetin you go tell Oga Governor wey give you political appointment for Abuja? Say you waka go Umuahia for Omugwo . . . go and come back na, if your replacement won't welcome you!

You know Oga coogar likes arguing blindly!

Yes ke
Modern omugwo
Old things are passed away mehn

coogar:

don't mind the hypocrites....
all of them would grow up to become wicked mother inlaws - the new breed are actually worse with their sons. are these not the same women who follow their sons to school to slap the teachers who disciplined their sons? siddon there dey look - in the next 20 yrs, someone would come here to ridicule babyosisi and sisikill for dragging pot of stew with their daughters-in laws.

Yes. If the teachers had minded their business, they would be no slap. I said it on this forum once or many times that in 2010, I slapped a teacher who slapped my niece, NIECE OOO not daughter. You don't hurt people close to me and expect to get away with it. I am not against disciplining a child and I have made that known here many times but when you decide to over-use your power of authority because you think the other person is helpless or isn't the right place to confront you, then you must be wicked.

Coogar, I did not marry my husband for any eediot to insult him directly and/or indirectly. The day any sister, uncle, aunty, father, mother, brother insults my husband, I will figuratively kill that person. I protect my own, I don't leave them out to be eaten alive by beasts and I expect my husband to do same and even more.

I repeat, there is only so much a human being can take. ME, I was born strong, tough and ready to send to hell witches and wizards in human form. I don't beg to be noticed and I don't expect an inlaw to do same. I am bringing up my kids same way. My daughters must have that spirit of a "tiger" and (Peaceful) in them. That has brought me so far, that was what attracted their father to me in the first place

Go to women that are childless or women that only had baby girls and they will give you chilling stories of what they have endured in the hands of their MIL and other inlaws and when the husband is on his wife's side,they conspire to turn his heart against her.
Obviously you are passionate about your mother and there is nothing wrong with it

I know about that, and I have seen it happen. But the OP isnt in that picture, is she?

It is not ok for an MIL to criticize her DIL's cooking or housekeeping or motherly roles,so please never allow your relatives do that to your wife
No woman will take kindly to that.
Just like no man will stand his Wife's mother or relatives lecturing him on how to make more money to become a better son inlaw for them
That is the equivalent

Agreed,I cant allow my relative. But always remember that it depends on the context under discussion, which in this case is the MIL and her DIL--the OP over-stepped her boundaries.

If my husband enjoys my food and my MiL comes and criticizes me and takes it upon herself to cook for her son because she says I am a bad cook,I would want her to leave too.that will be the action of almost every woman.
You owe it to your wife to give your mother and relatives rules and instructions when they visit to forestall any problems.It is insulting for a wife to be ridiculed in her own home by guests under her roof just because she is married to their son.
I am talking to you now as a married woman in the business a while too

If I enjoy my wife's food( I know a good food when I taste one) and my mum say's the food isnt good, then I would not want that. BUT if she isnt a good cook, I will find a way for her to learn from my mum. Me I know like poor food because I was not raised in that way. How can i be in my own house and still be thinking of my mum's food? ehn? Abeg oo.

I read you talking about beating or slapping your wife,i dont know your age but you need to change that ugly mindset
It is never ok to slap your wife,it tells more about you than about anything else

Ma'am, in all that has been said, I still respect your views... no matter how I may written it. I am not a woman beater as such. picture this, I am very gentle person, I dont easily get angry, I laugh off certain this, very tolerant, but if you know by this personality and later heard that I slapped someone, I can bet you that you will be forced to ask what happen. You be forced to ask why and what resulted to such. That is just that because before ever I could do something like that, then it means its has gotten to a point of no return.

Let me leave you with one last word hopefully it will mean something
No woman goes to her husbands house to show The man or his mother pepper most women come into marriage with all their heart with this idea that it will all be love in the air from all but many are often met with the worst hostility you can think from their inlaws and sadly husbands too in instances.when you see a woman lash out at her MIL try to find out what the MIL did,I guarantee most times,the MIL has pushed her to her limits.
Secondly many of those very nasty MILs didn't just become nasty MILs they are nasty people to begin with ,people who don't get along with neighbors and others

I can also guarantee you that if a woman comes into my house with hope of building a happy home, she will also be given the best of everything that I have got. I promise you here and now that she will, most of the time, have cause to be grateful to God for finding a man like me.

At the bold text, I agree with you. Everything I have said so far was used with my mother in the picture and trying to correlate with what the OP has done. If you permit me, my mother was an easy going person and flows well with everybody. I also know that my mum could tell my wife if there was something she wasnt do right, but she is wise enough not to let it seem like a bossy MIL. because of age, she would intelligently convince her DIL to see reason why she should it her way.

Like the neighbour I described who was insulting her mother, I have watch my mum do that a lot of times to different people. she tells them how and why. therefore, you will be left to think if she was saying something right or wrong, which most of the time, they always seem to agree with her. That's how she does her thing.

Dont also forget that sometimes, a mother warning is the a mirror of life, such that if a child does not heed his mother's warning, he end's up regretting it for the rest of his life. I am saying this due to what I saw happen to my mother's 1st son.

In all of this, I can only be careful and that's why I say there is no automatic shirt in my house, she will have to earn it as much as I earns hers. Pardon me; I am just trying to be careful.

Above all, it was REALLY nice to meet a new set of friends. Wow! no wonder they say that every disappointment is a blessing in disguise. I was banned at the romance section and I wandered around the street of NL which landed me here because I am following ivynwa, who happened to be the earlier poster of this thread.



I also want to thank everyone that has contributed to this thought-provoking ,brain-teasing and life-revealing debate. It was fun having you all.

I think this and the politic section is where I may be hanging out come 2013 plus, who know like money? Of course the the BUSINESS section.


babyosisi, I really appreciate the time spent here with you, stillwater, coogar, sapele don, the op. edit: kobojunkie

May God see us all through this year and beyond and also continue to bless our individual families. Amen ciao!

Vikin:

Ma friend, what you doing here! Talking about MIL you never had yet! As a future petroleum Engineer, pray you marry a old wife, if not, if you get those offshore job of one month on and off. She go hear whim for your wife hand.

Vikin:

Ma friend, what you doing here! Talking about MIL you never had yet! As a future petroleum Engineer, pray you marry a old wife, if not, if you get those offshore job of one month on and off. She go hear whim for your wife hand.

lmfao laughing in india *nehi nehi nehi nehi*

[quote author=jennykadry]

[/quote


I wonder how good turn out to be old! A good wife!

2sexy:

Whether married or not, my life wouldnt be much different... okay, my wife wouldnt have to deal with any of this because her MIL wouldn't be available. so I guess you are rest assured that my wife will live peacefully okay? Are you happy now?

Definitely not happy as I feel pity for any women who will end up with a man of your mentality. I can just imagine the heartaches and pain the person will have to endure when the honeymoon period(assuming their is one) is over.

Here is the question I asked you earlier

Kobojunkie:
Just one question! It is that it is OK for you to watch your mother abuse, disrespect and humiliate, another woman whom you supposedly love (just wondering is you married her to be pin-cushion for your mother's insults and venom) in her own house(I am assuming here that you know that once you are married, your house becomes your wife's as well),but it is not Ok for that women who has endured much abuse from your mother, on your behalf, to retaliate?

Kobojunkie:

Definitely not happy as I feel pity for any women who will end up with a man of your mentality. I can just imagine the heartaches and pain the person will have to endure when the honeymoon period(assuming their is one) is over.

That is what you think because I dont share your view. But I know I have heart of Gold but just want to be careful so as not to have it shattered. I can pamper a lady but I also learnt their language the hard way... screwed to my brain.

2sexy: That is what you think because I dont share your view. But I know I have heart of Gold but just want to be careful so as not to have it shattered.

It is not about my view really, it is about what you said . . . I didn't put these words in your head, or make you type them.

Just one question! It is that it is OK for you to watch your mother abuse, disrespect and humiliate, another woman whom you supposedly love (just wondering is you married her to be pin-cushion for your mother's insults and venom) in her own house(I am assuming here that you know that once you are married, your house becomes your wife's as well),but it is not Ok for that women who has endured much abuse from your mother, on your behalf, to retaliate?

@2sexy, can you please answer the above? thank you

Kobojunkie:
It is not about my view really, it is about what you said . . . I didn't put these words in your head, or make you type them.

I understand... I just cant tolerate nuisance. It depends on who is in the picture.

From all you have said, I can also assume that you are not even as bad as the woman I have put in my picture. But you know some people do change as after marriage and may be a with a child or two in the marriage, automatically assuming that the have arrived and therefore want to bring out their true colour.

It is for this reason I say there are no automatic shirt, taking a cue from my elder brother. Hope you understand.

2sexy: I understand... I just cant tolerate nuisance. It depends on who is in the picture.

From all you have said, I can also assume that you are not even as bad as the woman I have put in my picture. But you know some people do change as after marriage and may be a with a child or two in the marriage, automatically assuming that the have arrived and therefore want to bring out their true colour.

It is for this reason I say there are no automatic shirt, taking a cue from my elder brother. Hope you understand.

I am sure and the nuisance as you have made it obvious will be the woman you marry . . . hence the reason why I feel pity for whomever will decide to take on that role. Nothing but pity in fact. As it is obvious , as you continue to skirt around the question that you will be OK with her mistreatment.

People do not change after marriage . . . marriage has nothing to do with it. Change happens only when the person in question decides to turn a new leaf, whether after, before, pre, post marriage. However, most people change for the worse, and not for the better, hence the reason why I, again, feel pity, for that woman, whomever she may be.

jennykadry:

@2sexy, can you please answer the above? thank you

and I am telling you that my mother wont do such if she were still alive. Humiliating, abusing, oppressing someone wrongly, NO! I wont and that will mean that she is a good wife. The same also applies to be reversed. There are too sides to a coin isn't it? I wont be partial in any condition.

2sexy: and I am telling you that my mother wont do such if she were still alive. Humiliating, abusing, oppressing someone wrongly, NO! I wont and that will mean that she is a good wife. The same also applies to be reversed. There are too sides to a coin isn't it? I wont be partial in any condition.

You haven't answered the question yet

babyosisi:

Davidylan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have been walking the length and breadth of nairaland in search of you,asking of you
Wow my dear brother this na ya eyes?
Good to see you are alive and well
Sill hot headed and smart?
You don marry yet?
Finished your graduate school?
Working?
Where are thiefofheart,,debosky ,pataki and all the people that stormed NL those early nairaland days.we had loads of fun .

(((((((((((((((((((Hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))


*Sorry for the off topic *

my sister. the kain happiness wey grip me when i saw your moniker. Good to note you are doing very well as well.
lol a big YES to all your questions except the marry part o. Good women are hard to come by, i would not like a thief to reap where she has not sown.

Kobojunkie:

I am sure and the nuisance as you have made it obvious will be the woman you marry . . . hence the reason why I feel pity for whomever will decide to take on that role. Nothing but pity in fact. As it is obvious , as you continue to skirt around the question that you will be OK with her mistreatment.

People do not change after marriage . . . marriage has nothing to do with it. Change happens only when the person in question decides to turn a new leaf, whether after, before, pre, post marriage. However, most people change for the worse, and not for the better, hence the reason why I, again, feel pity, for that woman, whomever she may be.

and I am also letting you know that I am my wife will have to earn whatever she deserve. NO partiality.

If she was a good wife and tells my mother to leave my house, I am still telling you that I wont take it. I know that if such happens, my wife tell my mother to leave my house in my presence, she will definitely burst into tears. And you know what that is what I wont not be happy to see-- her tears.

The bottom line is that no matter how I try to make you see reasons, you wont. My up bringing is different. maybe I have been exposed to some bad experiences which has made me draw my conclusions, and i think I have also said what I have seen wives do to their husband. This does not mean that i am wishing to marry a bad wife or assuming that all women are the same,which of course they are not, but has really made me VERY sensitive with whom I am having a relationship with.

This bring to mind the landlord's wife. I mean the same compound where we rented while building our house. The parent of the landlord didnt like the wife and I wont blame them because I saw her display some traits of bad wife.

I want to ask you now, what crime could your husband commit now that will make you not to visit him at his hospital and also not cook for him to eat?

She was even flirting with another man within this period.

It may surprise you that it was my mother who cooked for this man and she would often sending me to go and give him at the hospital. Till the man left that hospital, she( the wife) never went there. It is not that my mother is the alpha and omega but it is who she was at heart, a loving and kind soul. Therefore I know she will NOT humiliate my wife unjustly.

The tenants had to make arrangement to alert his parents which the mother came and played her role as a mother. Now back to your question... if this this kind of wife, I can tell you that I WONT give a DAMN how she being treated because she deserve every bit of it.

The wife of this landlord is beautiful no doubt. But left for me o, I cant leave with such a person.

davidylan:

my sister. the kain happiness wey grip me when i saw your moniker. Good to note you are doing very well as well.
lol a big YES to all your questions except the marry part o. Good women are hard to come by, i would not like a thief to reap where she has not sown.

did you women see that? I laugh in chinese *wong fi fu chi*

2sexy: and I am also letting you know that I am my wife will have to earn whatever she deserve. NO partiality.

If she was a good wife and tells my mother to leave my house, I am still telling you that I wont take it. I know that if such happens, my wife tell my mother to leave my house in my presence, she will definitely burst into tears. And you know what that is what I wont not be happy to see-- her tears.

The bottom line is that no matter how I try to make you see reasons, you wont. My up bringing is different. maybe I have been exposed to some bad experiences which has made me draw my conclusions, and i think I have also said what I have seen wives do to their husband. This does not mean that i am wishing to marry a bad wife or assuming that all women are the same,which of course they are not, but has really made me VERY sensitive with whom I am having a relationship with.

This bring to mind the landlord's wife. I mean the same compound where we rented while building our house. The parent of the landlord didnt like the wife and I wont blame them because I saw her display some traits of bad wife.

I want to ask you now, what crime could your husband commit now that will make you not to visit him at his hospital and also not cook for him to eat?

She was even flirting with another man within this period.

It may surprise you that it was my mother who cooked for this man and she would often sending me to go and give him at the hospital. Till the man left that hospital, she never went there. It is not that my mother is the alpha and omega but it is who she was at heart, a loving and kind soul. Therefore I know she will NOT humiliate my wife unjustly.

The tenants had to make arrangement to alert his parents which the mother came and played her role as a mother. Now back to your question... if this this kind of wife, I can tell you that I WONT give a DAMN how she being treated because she deserve every bit of it.

The wife of this landlord is beautiful no doubt. But left for me o, I cant leave with such a person.

Your mama dey try oh, cooking for another woman's husband while the wife is alive and well! I don't think people should meddle in other people's marriages. You can cook and take to him in the hospital, no wahala, but not take over feeding the man!

Do you know why he was hospitalized? Do you know if he was being treated for gonorrhea which he contacted from an ashewo? If you were the wife, will you visit him or cook for him?

But you mum went and made her look bad by cooking for her husband. I don't know sha, but that doesn't seem right!

2sexy: and I am also letting you know that I am my wife will have to earn whatever she deserve. NO partiality.

Hence the reason why I feel nothing but pity for the wife and the marriage . . .

Haba! Women and dia wahala,me i no go tolerate wahala 4 my house o.But wait o wats d essence of being married wen u cnt even enjoy it.Abi na 2 marry white gal beta pass?? Dis kind tin tire me o

2sexy:
I know about that, and I have seen it happen. But the OP isnt in that picture, is she?


Agreed,I cant allow my relative. But always remember that it depends on the context under discussion, which in this case is the MIL and her DIL--the OP over-stepped her boundaries.

If I enjoy my wife's food( I know a good food when I taste one) and my mum say's the food isnt good, then I would not want that. BUT if she isnt a good cook, I will find a way for her to learn from my mum. Me I know like poor food because I was not raised in that way. How can i be in my own house and still be thinking of my mum's food? ehn? Abeg oo.




Ma'am, in all that has been said, I still respect your views... no matter how I may written it. I am not a woman beater as such. picture this, I am very gentle person, I dont easily get angry, I laugh off certain this, very tolerant, but if you know by this personality and later heard that I slapped someone, I can bet you that you will be forced to ask what happen. You be forced to ask why and what resulted to such. That is just that because before ever I could do something like that, then it means its has gotten to a point of no return.



I can also guarantee you that if a woman comes into my house with hope of building a happy home, she will also be given the best of everything that I have got. I promise you here and now that she will, most of the time, have cause to be grateful to God for finding a man like me.

At the bold text, I agree with you. Everything I have said so far was used with my mother in the picture and trying to correlate with what the OP has done. If you permit me, my mother was an easy going person and flows well with everybody. I also know that my mum could tell my wife if there was something she wasnt do right, but she is wise enough not to let it seem like a bossy MIL. because of age, she would intelligently convince her DIL to see reason why she should it her way.

Like the neighbour I described who was insulting her mother, I have watch my mum do that a lot of times to different people. she tells them how and why. therefore, you will be left to think if she was saying something right or wrong, which most of the time, they always seem to agree with her. That's how she does her thing.

Dont also forget that sometimes, a mother warning is the a mirror of life, such that if a child does not heed his mother's warning, he end's up regretting it for the rest of his life. I am saying this due to what I saw happen to my mother's 1st son.

In all of this, I can only be careful and that's why I say there is no automatic shirt in my house, she will have to earn it as much as I earns hers. Pardon me; I am just trying to be careful.

Above all, it was REALLY nice to meet a new set of friends. Wow! no wonder they say that every disappointment is a blessing in disguise. I was banned at the romance section and I wandered around the street of NL which landed me here because I am following ivynwa, who happened to be the earlier poster of this thread.



I also want to thank everyone that has contributed to this thought-provoking ,brain-teasing and life-revealing debate. It was fun having you all.

I think this and the politic section is where I may be hanging out come 2013 plus, who know like money? Of course the the BUSINESS section.


babyosisi, I really appreciate the time spent here with you, stillwater, coogar, sapele don, the op.

May God see us all through this year and beyond and also continue to bless our individual families. Amen ciao!

I have enjoyed reading this response from you
You don't need permission to speak about your mom,it is obvious you love / loved her
Did I read you say she passed away,I know you must miss her and a thread like this must re open wounds for you
May God help you bear her loss
Keep those sweet memories of her alive and take care
may God guide and protect you and give you a good woman for a wife and bless your marriage abundantly.

davidylan:

my sister. the kain happiness wey grip me when i saw your moniker. Good to note you are doing very well as well.
lol a big YES to all your questions except the marry part o. Good women are hard to come by, i would not like a thief to reap where she has not sown.

Nna shine your eyes well well
There are many hawks parading as wife materials
Women with alternate agenda
God will not let that type come near you IJMN Amen

Maybe I have told this story b4

There was one that married our inlaw,nobody knew the girl already had a bobo somewhere in Florida and used our inlaw for papers to come to the USA
The man spent money,did trado wedding sef,filed and brought her here
As soon as her green card appeared in her hand she absconded while he was at work and ran to her lover
I am a woman o,but I have seen our women in action
How about the Nigerian woman her husband used machete and almost turned her hands into ngwo ngwo pepper soup after she used him to get papers while seeing her Haitaian lover on the side.When they imprisoned him,Nigerians in North Carolina carried placard and rallied for his release or reduced sentence because of what the woman put him through.

Not your portion I say

i'm happy the naija men got duped.
any man who ignores his immediate environment and decides to marry a girl from onitsha deserves to be ripped off! unless a man is marrying a spouse he left in nigeria before travelling, there's no pity for any nigerian man in texas going to babyosisi's village in mbaise to find a bride!

babyosisi:

I have enjoyed reading this response from you
You don't need permission to speak about your mom,it is obvious you love / loved her
Did I read you say she passed away,I know you must miss her and a thread like this must re open wounds for you
May God help you bear her loss
Keep those sweet memories of her alive and take care
may God guide and protect you and give you a good woman for a wife and bless your marriage abundantly.

Yes... I loved her and this month, on the 18th of December, will make it 4 years since she left us.
She pampered me and my other siblings and she was our mother and father from birth into adulthood. My only pain is that she didnt live long enough to eat the fruit of her labour.

But I guess she would be smiling in her grave because we learnt to be tough and survived without her. It wasnt easy initially but we fought on. She actually died in my arms. I watched helplessly and slowly as she left this world.

Please do not see me as someone that will maltreat my wife. Everything I have said is because of what I have experienced and seen happen around me.

Which mother will be happy to see her son not having a car but a wife who had nothing when she came into the his house has a bus used for transport and even went as far buying for her brother. They will conspire to fight her son in his own house, threatening to kill him etc. Read between line plus all I have been saying and you will know who I am referring to here.

May your sons never meet or marry a bad wife.

Thank you also for the prayers.