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Getting Pregnant Before Marriage - Family (3) - Nairaland

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Important Things To Discuss Before Marriage / Men That Want Their Women Pregnant Before They Can Marry / You Must Get Pregnant Before We Can Wed! (1) (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by NEROSKY(m): 4:24pm On Dec 28, 2012
Mustymohd2: to me any lady i Bleep b4 getin married, true 2 god i wont promise her hnd of married
you be mumu! If u wan buy car,you nogo test am,esp tokunbo

Buh it could be berem thats in dis mess.. Com u beta talk tru
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by 2sexy(m): 4:27pm On Dec 28, 2012
James Lucia: a guy asked my cousin to get preg befor marriage she did n d man dumped her.
angry angry angry angry bad bad bad... some people do things without regarding what if it were their sister or future daughters.

1 Like

Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by Pirosaw: 4:27pm On Dec 28, 2012
I am proud of such lady and most ladies reply, the man in question is not prepared for marriage, what is love, love that can make marriage work is an unconditional love, why must she get pregnant? the man is selfish and not matured for marriage, tell the lady to stand by her decision, if the man is for her then he should accept her decision, pregnancy is not a guarantee that the person will have a baby, anything can happen. Marriage is for companionship first of all. Ladies you people are Queens don't allow men who are not for you to deceive you into marriage. Marriage are for matured mind.

2 Likes

Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by kulyie: 4:28pm On Dec 28, 2012
Okija_juju: SIMPLE RULES!!!

Tell your cousin to sign a PRENUPT saying that should she fail to carry belle after the wedding and its medically confirmed that its as a result of her fault, she would agree to a divorce with no financial settlement.. #SIMPLE!!!
thats very ok,fair enough,however depending on how desperate she is to wear the ring,it makes her look like the only reason her husband is getting married to her is for making babies,nothing more.if i were in her shoes however,i wont even sign that kind of agreement because i know theres more to me than making babies,i have more worth and more things i have to offer than just making babies,that is why its a pleasant experience to marry a man that doesnt look at you from down below but sees you as a complementary partner
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by awatefe: 4:29pm On Dec 28, 2012
stillwater: By sleeping with the lady before marriage is he not contributing to this so-called 'waywardness'? Nigerian men are hypocrites! Freaking razz things.

Be quite...
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by Nobody: 4:30pm On Dec 28, 2012
berem: It seems it has become a new trend for some men to request
for their spouse to be to be pregnant fIrst before the proper marriage
takes place.I have had the opportunity to ask about 20 yet to be married
men and 15 of of them wants their wives to be to get pregnant first.I
also asked them why they wanted it,I was shocked when they all said "I
don't trust nigerian girls these days".
I have a cousin who is gonna be 34years by next year and she is not yet
married.There is this guy she was introduced to for marriage but the man
gave her condition that she must get pregnant first.My cousin being a
very stubborn lady refused and said she will never get pregnant before
marriage.Her mum has been worried because of her age and also being the
first daughter.
My main worry now is that her mum wants me to advise her on what to
do.Right now am confused.I don't know what kind of advice to give.Should
I advise her to get pregnant or wait for the right time? Am really
scared the guy might leave her if she refuses to get pregnant
first.

I have told you to upgrade your syntax girlfriend ! grin grin
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by awatefe: 4:32pm On Dec 28, 2012
debrief08: Lol, This is a classic swallowing panadol for another persons headache.
Lol @ loosing men because of her sturborness, so a jhuman being can choose wwhat they can and cannot live with, hia na wa oh, I am rolling on the floor at her sisters now joining her by rejecting a short man.
Let them make their choices and stand by their principles, what kind of marriage will I go into with such an ultimatum? Today its get pregnant out of wedluck, tomorrow it is resign from your job ( I am sure then you guys will pressure her to "keep her husband"
I am so proud of her for desipte her age she will refuses to be bullied into a marriage, if she goes in with desperation and giving into silly ultimatums she will live the rest of her married life at a disadvantage.
If he doubts her fertility he should request for a medical test of fitness, Marriage is about companionship and partnership, if he doesn't get that, na him sabi.
I thank God for your cousin, better be single and happy than bullied into a marriage to make you and her mother happy

the best post i have read on this issue.
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by Okijajuju1(m): 4:34pm On Dec 28, 2012
kulyie: thats very ok,fair enough,however depending on how desperate she is to wear the ring,it makes her look like the only reason her husband is getting married to her is for making babies,nothing more.if i were in her shoes however,i wont even sign that kind of agreement because i know theres more to me than making babies,i have more worth and more things i have to offer than just making babies,that is why its a pleasant experience to marry a man that doesnt look at you from down below but sees you as a complementary partner

My darling...

THE PRIMARY FUNCTION OF MARRIAGE IN NIGERIA IS PROCREATION...

Companionship and co are all secondary..
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by AZeD1(m): 4:34pm On Dec 28, 2012
Any man that tells a woman to get pregnant before marriage, just wants a baby making machine at home.
@Berem your cousin is responsible for her life and you should just keep on posting her mother.

1 Like

Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by Philolos: 4:34pm On Dec 28, 2012
berem: It seems it has become a new trend for some men to request for their spouse to be to be pregnant fIrst before the proper marriage takes place.I have had the opportunity to ask about 20 yet to be married men and 15 of of them wants their wives to be to get pregnant first.I also asked them why they wanted it,I was shocked when they all said "I don't trust nigerian girls these days".
I have a cousin who is gonna be 34years by next year and she is not yet married.There is this guy she was introduced to for marriage but the man gave her condition that she must get pregnant first.My cousin being a very stubborn lady refused and said she will never get pregnant before marriage.Her mum has been worried because of her age and also being the first daughter.
My main worry now is that her mum wants me to advise her on what to do.Right now am confused.I don't know what kind of advice to give.Should I advise her to get pregnant or wait for the right time? Am really scared the guy might leave her if she refuses to get pregnant first.

@OP, there are always two sides to any story. Perhaps the so-called husband (or guy) to be is also unsure of himself and wants to see that his sperm is potent enough to produce a child. Perhaps he doubts himself, which your cousin should also pose to him as a fair question. It's not only a question of whether your cousin is fertile but is her partner too. From another standpoint, this calls for good negotiation skills/tactics from your cousin if she really likes the guy. Of course in most negotiations, you would ask for the moon knowing you can't get it. Especially since the guy in this case feels like he has an upper hand because the lady's child-bearing clock is perceived to be winding down. Your cousin should nullify this perception in your cousin’s mind by pointing out to him cases upon cases where healthy child bearing has occurred in women up until their early 50s. He should assure the guy that there is no cause for alarm. The earlier he proposes and the nut tied, the earlier child bearing and raring can commence. He should not be or become an obstacle to their potential fruitful union.

She should tell the guy that he is the one wasting everyone’s time right now, including the time of some of us on NL. smiley
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by kulyie: 4:35pm On Dec 28, 2012
Pirosaw: I am proud of such lady and most ladies reply, the man in question is not prepared for marriage, what is love, love that can make marriage work is an unconditional love, why must she get pregnant? the man is selfish and not matured for marriage, tell the lady to stand by her decision, if the man is for her then he should accept her decision, pregnancy is not a guarantee that the person will have a baby, anything can happen. Marriage is for companionship first of all. Ladies you people are Queens don't allow men who are not for you to deceive you into marriage. Marriage are for matured mind.
exactly.if he gives you conditionalities,you too give him conditionalities,if he wants you to get preggy before marriage, u too make him sign that if he is caught having extra marital affairs,half of his life savings is going to your pocket.if its children he wants and not necesarily you,give him and wait for him to f up,(because there is a very strong likelihood that he will engage in extramarital affairs) when he's caught,u can decide to leave the child with him or take the child and walk away from the marriage richer,at least equation balanced,each party has fulfilled his own side of the bargain
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by Nobody: 4:37pm On Dec 28, 2012
Okija_juju:

My darling...

THE PRIMARY FUNCTION OF MARRIAGE IN NIGERIA IS PROCREATION...

Companionship and co are all secondary..


No wonder the shithole is losing it because of the misplaced priority.

1 Like

Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by kulyie: 4:38pm On Dec 28, 2012
Okija_juju:

My darling...

THE PRIMARY FUNCTION OF MARRIAGE IN NIGERIA IS PROCREATION...

Companionship and co are all secondary..
look at my response to pirosaw,i wanted to quote you instead of him,that response is for you
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by tsticks1(m): 4:40pm On Dec 28, 2012
GETTIN PREGNANT BEFORE MARRIAG IS WRONG LIKE WRONG

1 Like

Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by buchibabe: 4:40pm On Dec 28, 2012
Richvkunt:

Berem,
you be small pikin.
Talk about your self.
I know wetin I dey talk- some girls destroy their wombs and ability to concieve by engaging in more than 50 abortions/D&Cs before they clock 25 years of age.
Take it from some one who knows.

50 abortions bfor 25yrs Na big lie. Any babe wey try dat one na mortuary straight even bfor d 20th one. Small small abeg. Make ur lie no blind me abeg

2 Likes

Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by tsticks1(m): 4:42pm On Dec 28, 2012
I DNT SUPPORT IT

1 Like

Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by hrykanu231(m): 4:42pm On Dec 28, 2012
stillwater: By sleeping with the lady before marriage is he not contributing to this so-called 'waywardness'? Nigerian men are hypocrites! Freaking razz things.

Next time use the word some men and stop the fallacy. abi u no get papa and brothers ni? Pack well o.
@OP: I dnt subscribe to it, but some people want "INSURANCE" o
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by kfako1: 4:42pm On Dec 28, 2012
tchidi: Dunno about others, but I have a strict 'no sex b4 marriage' rule!! If u can't wait till we r married, (not even traditionally sef, church!) Then back off! She should hold fast to her values! If he loves u, he'll love u even if u don't give him a child... My 2 cents sha! undecided

You are very funny.. U will wait a long time. Look around u and check for how many ppl behind u that hold the same values. Talking about ur girlfriends not to talk of guys. I respect ur decision but u are on a long thing.

A virgin doesn't make u a good or bad girl as far as I'm concern. It ur character and personality that matters.

Y do must ppl with the same view change their mind. Reality kicks in. Also depends on how old u are.
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by huninaija(f): 4:47pm On Dec 28, 2012
As for me I cannot get pregnant before marriage.. If I'm good enough to get pregnant for you am I too bad to get married to? As for me not happening...

For others it depends on the situation at hand, age could be a factor, some cultures also prefer a woman to get pregnant before marriage etc

If it was my auntie I would try and convince her to talk to the man and ask him why he's so keen on having a baby now, and if they could at least do trad before any baby..

1 Like

Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by freecocoa(f): 4:47pm On Dec 28, 2012
NEROSKY:

hey young maama! Go get pregnant and get married...the man just wanted to be sure you can conceive..If you like make you loss the child who cares
Since when is the matter about me biko?

You get sense so?
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by babymama3: 4:47pm On Dec 28, 2012
berem: It seems it has become a new trend for some men to request for their spouse to be to be pregnant fIrst before the proper marriage takes place.I have had the opportunity to ask about 20 yet to be married men and 15 of of them wants their wives to be to get pregnant first.I also asked them why they wanted it,I was shocked when they all said "I don't trust nigerian girls these days".
I have a cousin who is gonna be 34years by next year and she is not yet married.There is this guy she was introduced to for marriage but the man gave her condition that she must get pregnant first.My cousin being a very stubborn lady refused and said she will never get pregnant before marriage.Her mum has been worried because of her age and also being the first daughter.
My main worry now is that her mum wants me to advise her on what to do.Right now am confused.I don't know what kind of advice to give.Should I advise her to get pregnant or wait for the right time? Am really scared the guy might leave her if she refuses to get pregnant first.


This is a sure sign that the husband to be is deranged
This will be a marriage made in hell
This cousin of yours will be expected to meet demands through out that marriage and she could never do enough to please the eediot
God help her if the baby turns out to be a girl or a series of girls her misery will intensify a million times
He may 48 hrs after delivery demand she loses weight or transforms herself into Bianca Onoh
If she is wise,she will kick that slimeball to the curb and read the writing,she does not need a vision to tell her that this is not the one

Let him find another mgbeke to impregnate

3 Likes

Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by Nobody: 4:49pm On Dec 28, 2012
tchidi: Dunno about others, but I have a strict 'no sex b4 marriage' rule!! If u can't wait till we r married, (not even traditionally sef, church!) Then back off! She should hold fast to her values! If he loves u, he'll love u even if u don't give him a child... My 2 cents sha! undecided

it's always awkward when kids talk about marriage.

1 Like

Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by kulyie: 4:50pm On Dec 28, 2012
buchibabe:

50 abortions bfor 25yrs Na big lie. Any babe wey try dat one na mortuary straight even bfor d 20th one. Small small abeg. Make ur lie no blind me abeg
hehehehe abi o.and some of them dey find virgin.una go see virgins for maternity ward.yeye dey smell
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by kulyie: 4:52pm On Dec 28, 2012
baby_mama:


This is a sure sign that the husband to be is deranged
This will be a marriage made in hell
This cousin of yours will be expected to meet demands through out that marriage and she could never do enough to please the eediot
God help her if the baby turns out to be a girl or a series of girls her misery will intensify a million times
If she is wise,she will kick that slime all to the urb,she does not need a vision to tell her that this is not the one
word! Correct one at that
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by gsalvatore(m): 4:53pm On Dec 28, 2012
Nobody wants a Non-Tested Marchandise.
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by kulyie: 4:55pm On Dec 28, 2012
huni_naija: As for me I cannot get pregnant before marriage.. If I'm good enough to get pregnant for you am I too bad to get married to? As for me not happening...

For others it depends on the situation at hand, age could be a factor, some cultures also prefer a woman to get pregnant before marriage etc

If it was my auntie I would try and convince her to talk to the man and ask him why he's so keen on having a baby now, and if they could at least do trad before any baby..
not even trad,court wedding sef.i even happy say women don dey wise up.dem don dey use their number 6 enter marriage instead of the thing between their legs cheesy
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by mstutu: 4:58pm On Dec 28, 2012
Wot happens wen u agree and after weeks or even months of sleeping together, you dont get pregnant even tho you know nothing is wrong with you .its God that gives children.

1 Like

Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by babymama3: 4:58pm On Dec 28, 2012
Things happen and a woman finds herself pregnant before the wedding
Not the best but stuff happens
But for a man to give it as a condition,he is saying loud and clear that you are only as good as your uterus
He has no iota of love for you

That is what he is telling you,only a desperado will bow to such stupidity


That is a control freak
So what happens after she is pregnant and he decides to leave her anyway?
It has happened to many many girls
Carry belle and the man moves on then you are reduced to begging a man to come and take the shame away from your family abi?
See how Bisi Ibidapo - Obe was disgracing herself with pregnancy that she was begging Dino to come and claim,selling herself kobo kobo
Tufia!

2 Likes

Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by kulyie: 4:59pm On Dec 28, 2012
A-ZeD:
Any man that tells a woman to get pregnant before marriage, just wants a baby making machine at home.
@Berem your cousin is responsible for her life and you should just keep on posting her mother.
exactly

1 Like

Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by freecocoa(f): 4:59pm On Dec 28, 2012
Double post.
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by lordgbengs: 4:59pm On Dec 28, 2012
Quite a funny issue but from the post i have read,i think some questions need to be answered:

Are they currently having sex? this might prompt the guy

Also do not judge the guy, he might be talking from experience or maybe he prayed somewhere and he was told the wife needs to get pregnant before marriage, i think communication is key

We do not need to judge anybody but listen to the whole story before judging.

IMO to those saying the lady should move on, do you guys think its easy to get a guy to marry these days even the un-serious ones are not ready, she is 34 and our time is running out for a lady, she needs to be wise in taking the decision.

I feel water will always find its own level
Re: Getting Pregnant Before Marriage by claremont(m): 5:00pm On Dec 28, 2012
The man involved simply stated his requirement in order for marriage to occur. If the girl involved doesn't like it, she can continue waiting on the lord while the man gets someone else. This is a very simple matter that shouldn't require all these insults and mudslinging. I'm sure there are multitude of ladies out there who are very willing to meet the man's requirement.

Marriage (these days) is a buyers market, and men are the buyers! grin

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