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The Day Guyman Fell - Literature - Nairaland

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I Fell In Love With A Vampire / Have U Seen This Story: The Day Guyman Fell / Jonny Kennedy:the Story Of The Boy Whose Skin Fell Off. (1) (2) (3) (4)

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The Day Guyman Fell by ChikaSunday(m): 10:02pm On Dec 26, 2012
THE DAY GUYMAN FELL.
Majekodumi: that is my name. The boys call me Majek, while the girls call me Maj. Segun, Wale, kola, and Nnanmdi are also involved. Ours was to trick people to into buying dead phones which they don’t find out until they reach home when it’s too late. If you ever meet us again, we deny you, because there was never a receipt. Our modus operendi? We look for dead Nokia phone with good casings. There is this liquid called Mr. shine which we use to clean these casings until they turn new; we stuff the phone with sizeable chunk of solid fufu or eba from a nearby buka and couple it. We put the coupled phone into our right trousers pocket. Next we get the same model of phone that is working, this real phone we hold out in the street of Olayeni in computer village or along Awolowo way in Ikeja near Ikeja Bus Stop ready for unsuspecting preys to come by.
This particular Friday 05-08-2011, at Awolowo Way I held out the real phone, A Nokia X2 using the normal, “Ss, ss, ss,” sound to attract buyers, while the dead phone containing eba was in my right trousers pocket.
“Ss, ss, ss” I continued as passers buy come across me from Ikeja Bus stop. As I brandished it again , a mugu just appeared.
“How much?” The young casually dressed lady asked.
“15K”, I answered.
“8”, she responded.
“No, no, no, I give you 13”.
She makes to go, “If you no go gree, okay now.”
“Wait, wait, wait, take am for 10”, I bargained.
She looked back and said, “8K, that’s what I have, and I know say I go fit get am inside market.”
“Well, you win”, I allowed her to touch it. As she checks the working phone, I gave her the normal dummy, “The battery is not fully charged. E go soon quench, when you reach home just charge am.” I took it from her while she opens her bag: that was when I did our usual Computer village wonder: I put the real phone into my left pocket and brought out the dead phone, eba fully loaded inside. Immediately she counted the money and handed it over to me I thanked her with a smile and moved quickly while she put the phone inside her bag.
Hurrayyy!!!! Majek!!! Wale hailed me as I crossed the road quickly to to meet him. “Yeah, maga don fall again and guy man must wack,” I cajoled and followed him through Olowu Street.
Fifteen minutes later in the food joint almost opposite Juli pharmacy, the two of us were busy downloading Blackberry (ie Beans & Bread) when the curtain opened to reveal two stern looking policemen and the young buyer. Officer na him be this”, She pointed at me.
“Wutin haphen?” the beans with bread couldn’t allow me to pronounce properly. As I tried to Speak again “Wet…” a gun butt hit me stopping me right there and I collapsed, beans and bread still in my mouth. The next time my eyes opened I was behind counters at Araromi police station near Adeniyi Jones.
Conceived and written by Felix Chika-Sunday
of Wiseheads Galaxy
08032606847
bloodofjesusinme@yahoo.com

Re: The Day Guyman Fell by nedu2000(m): 10:17pm On Dec 26, 2012
;DGood 4 U̶̲̥̅̊.......how much U̶̲̥̅̊ use settle police?

1 Like

Re: The Day Guyman Fell by VivicaMadawa(f): 10:33pm On Dec 26, 2012
the story is funny.

1 Like

Re: The Day Guyman Fell by dasdexter(m): 11:31pm On Dec 26, 2012
guyz dis is not a story(mayb d op's own is story) it happened real, we were in a bus, me & my pal wen a guy brought out a bb askin us to help im open d battery pack cos d stuff was real stiff, jst wen we were tryin to open it d bus jerked & d bb fell off & scattered revealin a pile of dirt insyd it, mehn u shoulda seen dis guy'z face, d feelin of bein duped off 8k for a purchasin a trashcan. I jst pity d dumbass nxt tym he would b a lot smarter

1 Like

Re: The Day Guyman Fell by ChikaSunday(m): 10:19pm On Jan 01, 2013
Guys do you like the story? I will be posting more soon. And if you need a creative writer for any kind of document, please do call me.
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by EfemenaXY: 6:50pm On Jan 02, 2013
Chika-Sunday:
Guys do you like the story? I will be posting more soon. And if you need a creative writer for any kind of document, please do call me.

Is this a real story or fiction? shocked shocked

Pls tell me it's fictious angry angry angry

1 Like

Re: The Day Guyman Fell by HumbledbYGrace: 2:49pm On Jan 03, 2013
Iam not gonna tell u I like the story BUT I need an update soon,m hooked wink
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by amiskurie(m): 4:42pm On Jan 04, 2013
Nice one,but do you think its save to post our works here,somebody might copy and make use of it.

1 Like

Re: The Day Guyman Fell by ChikaSunday(m): 12:09pm On Jan 28, 2013
Efemena_xy:

Is this a real story or fiction? shocked shocked

Pls tell me it's fictious angry angry angry

its fiction based on the actual activities of these miscreants. Any time you come to Awolowo way in Ikeja between Ikeja bus stop and Under-bridge you see these guys brandishing their spoils doing Ss, Ss, Ss.
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by ChikaSunday(m): 12:49pm On Jan 28, 2013
HumbledbYGrace: Iam not gonna tell u I like the story BUT I need an update soon,m hooked wink


Okay no problem. the police got hold of him and took him to Burundi: do you know what happens in Burundi? I want to receive your guess.
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by ChikaSunday(m): 12:59pm On Jan 28, 2013
amiskurie: Nice one,but do you think its save to post our works here,somebody might copy and make use of it.

I understand you my brother. There are two things that can happen to one's innovations: you keep your works because of fear of theft/piracy and you die without nobody seeing them an hearing about you or you take a risk and show off some of your works, probably as you pray and as fate may have it, a helper comes or stumbles on your work and your evolution begins. Therefore, this is what I do: I keep my movie scripts away from public eyes, i show off the less prized works. presently two movie directors are working on two of my blockbuster movies, one in Asaba and the other in Port-Harcourt. it's more risky not to take a risk at all. Thanks, you may call 08032606847.
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by EfemenaXY: 1:02pm On Jan 28, 2013
Chika-Sunday:


its fiction based on the actual activities of these miscreants. Any time you come to Awolowo way in Ikeja between Ikeja bus stop and Under-bridge you see these guys brandishing their spoils doing Ss, Ss, Ss.

Hmmm....okay. Never knew that though.

Chika-Sunday:



Okay no problem. the police got hold of him and took him to Burundi: do you know what happens in Burundi? I want to receive your guess.

I have absolutely no idea.

What happens in Burundi? undecided
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by ChikaSunday(m): 1:04pm On Jan 28, 2013
nedu2000: ;DGood 4 U̶̲̥̅̊.......how much U̶̲̥̅̊ use settle police?


Nedu I no com fit settle dem, dem carry me go Burundi. you know about Burundi?
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by ChikaSunday(m): 1:09pm On Jan 28, 2013
Efemena_xy:

Hmmm....okay. Never knew that though.



I have absolutely no idea.

What happens in Burundi? undecided

The bad gus there make love to you if you are a male; and if you are a female, your fellow chics make love to you too: i no you don't understand.
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by EfemenaXY: 1:12pm On Jan 28, 2013
^^ You mean it's some sort of g@y community? undecided
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by ChikaSunday(m): 1:23pm On Jan 28, 2013
Efemena_xy: ^^ You mean it's some sort of g@y community? undecided


No-o-o my dear! White college. Haven't you heard of white College?
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by EfemenaXY: 1:25pm On Jan 28, 2013
^^ No. sad

What is it anyway?
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by ChikaSunday(m): 1:30pm On Jan 28, 2013
Efemena_xy: ^^ No. sad

What is it anyway?
E--fe-mena: white college or Burundi means Nigerian prison or cell. Do you like the whole stuff, ha, ha, ha?
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by EfemenaXY: 1:34pm On Jan 28, 2013
^^ OMG!! shocked shocked shocked

Now I get you lipsrsealed undecided

No, I don't like the stuff (scams/prison) but I do like your write-up.

Kudos to you smiley
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by ChikaSunday(m): 1:40pm On Jan 28, 2013
Efemena_xy: ^^ OMG!! shocked shocked shocked

Now I get you lipsrsealed undecided

No, I don't like the stuff (scams/prison) but I do like your write-up.

Kudos to you smiley




Okay enjoy this short movie script and call me

THE HEART OF MAN


SYPNOSIS
There is a wilderness in marriage: many families went through it unscathed; some scathed; others vanquished. Would Nasa and Zack survive? The heart of ma--n.



FELIX CHIKA-SUNDAY

Of

WISEHEADS GALAXY
Ablase with Ideas & Run with Technology
wiseheadsgalaxy@yahoo.com, bloodofjesusinme@yahoo.com
08032606847










SCENE2: DAY 4 HOURS 30 MINUTES LATER
EXTERIOR: ON A BROKEN DOWN TRUCK IN FRONT OF A SHOP
A sorrowful theme begins to play underground as camera gives a shot to a little girl sweeping at the front of a shop and Nasa sitting beside a pack of smoozy yoghurt on a broken down truck in a street; her tears roll down her cheeks.

NASA
God; you know that I’ve told him the truth: that the condoms belong to Jessica who doesn’t want another pregnancy: since they have 2 sets of twins already. No; I will go back. It’s my matrimonial home.
[She stands up. She walks away in a camera long shot]


SCENE3: DAY
EXTERIOR: NASA WORKING ON THE GENERATOR
The sorrowful theme continues as camera views Nasa squatting beside the generator, looses the plug and the foam filter covering, shedding tears. She works on the head of the plug still shedding tears.

…TO BE CONTINUED
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by EfemenaXY: 1:42pm On Jan 28, 2013
Is that all?? angry sad

What am I gonna do with that? undecided
 
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by EfemenaXY: 1:55pm On Jan 28, 2013
^^ Hahaha!!!

Nice 1! I can almost picture that in my mind's eye...village setting, no doubt grin

Hubby's occupation: Farmer or probably unemployed.

Wife: Semi-literate houswife... cheesy

*** Why's your post suddenly hidden? *** undecided
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by EfemenaXY: 6:12am On Jan 29, 2013
Chika-Sunday:


The bad gus there make love to you if you are a male; and if you are a female, your fellow chics make love to you too: i no you don't understand.

I'm sorry Chika, but I've just gotta ask...did that ^^ happen to you, over there in Burundi?

I know, I know, I'm a nosey parker...but I just can't help myself... sad
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by HumbledbYGrace: 6:53am On Jan 29, 2013
Efemena_xy:

I'm sorry Chika, but I've just gotta ask...did that ^^ happen to you, over there in Burundi?

I know, I know, I'm a nosey parker...but I just can't help myself... sad
I was wondering too

@Chika please write ur 'tory here. I can't guess
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by ChikaSunday(m): 10:45am On Jan 30, 2013
Efemena_xy:

I'm sorry Chika, but I've just gotta ask...did that ^^ happen to you, over there in Burundi?

I know, I know, I'm a nosey parker...but I just can't help myself... sad


No, it's just fiction, it hasn't happened to me, I just learn from other people's experience. Actually I am gifted to create images, ideas and scenes from what is already existing or there about. So my dear, if you have any thing for me to write for you or your friends let me know. presently two of my movie scrips are with two different directors, one in Port-Harcourt and one in Asaba.
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by ChikaSunday(m): 10:51am On Jan 30, 2013
Efemena_xy: ^^ Hahaha!!!

Nice 1! I can almost picture that in my mind's eye...village setting, no doubt grin

Hubby's occupation: Farmer or probably unemployed.

Wife: Semi-literate houswife... cheesy

*** Why's your post suddenly hidden? *** undecided



Have you read this scene?
SCENE1: DAY
EXTERIOR: IN FRONT OF A HOUSE
An action theme starts underground as camera shows a woman, Nasa, 25 Year old, average height with T-shirt and jean knickers burst open a door, running out and slamming it back while she bolts shouting “yea! Yea!” jumping over the balcony in a premonition as the door opens again to reveal her 32 year old tall Husband, Zack tagging a wrapper on his shoulders. holding out a bag containing two condoms while on her pursuit.
NASA
Yea! Yea!
[She runs towards the gate]

ZACK
Why are you running? Eh? Why are you running? Don’t ever come back to this house again: don’t eve--r!
[He is holding out a bag containing two condoms while on her pursuit but grabs and aims a bottle at her]

NASA
[Turns in time to see the weapon flying towards her]
Yea! God!
[She dodges and closes the gate behind her quickly]
God! Hnm, hnm.

ZACK
Just 6 months after our wedding, just 6 months! You’re keeping condoms for other women, keeper! Keeper! You’re deceiving yourself! You’re deceiving yourself. Basta--rd ashawo: Bad daughter of a good mother. Don’t ever come back to this house again: don’t eve--r! I--gbaraja! (LovePeddler-Ika dialect in Delta state)
[He walks away closing the door behind him]
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by ChikaSunday(m): 10:55am On Jan 30, 2013
HumbledbYGrace: I was wondering too

@Chika please write ur 'tory here. I can't guess

Dear, i don't understand this one, can you make it Clearer for me.
Re: The Day Guyman Fell by ChikaSunday(m): 1:48pm On Feb 01, 2013
THE HEART OF MAN

from scene 1 to 3


SYPNOSIS
There is a wilderness in marriage: many families went through it unscathed; some scathed; others vanquished. Would Nasa and Zack survive? The heart of ma--n.



FELIX CHIKA-SUNDAY

Of

WISEHEADS GALAXY
Ablase with Ideas & Run with Technology
wiseheadsgalaxy@yahoo.com, bloodofjesusinme@yahoo.com
08032606847



SCENE1: DAY
EXTERIOR: IN FRONT OF A HOUSE
An action theme starts underground as camera shows a woman, Nasa, 25 Year old, average height with T-shirt and jean knickers burst open a door, running out and slamming it back while she bolts shouting “yea! Yea!” jumping over the balcony in a premonition as the door opens again to reveal her 32 year old tall Husband, Zack tagging a wrapper on his shoulders. holding out a bag containing two condoms while on her pursuit.

NASA
Yea! Yea!
[She runs towards the gate]

ZACK
Why are you running? Eh? Why are you running? Don’t ever come back to this house again: don’t eve--r!
[He is holding out a bag containing two condoms while on her pursuit but grabs and aims a bottle at her]

NASA
[Turns in time to see the weapon flying towards her]
Yea! God!
[She dodges and closes the gate behind her quickly]
God! Hnm, hnm.

ZACK
Just 6 months after our wedding, just 6 months! You’re keeping condoms for other women, keeper! Keeper! You’re deceiving yourself! You’re deceiving yourself. Basta--rd ashawo: Bad daughter of a good mother. Don’t ever come back to this house again: don’t eve--r! I--gbaraja! (LovePeddler-Ika dialect in Delta state)
[He walks away closing the door behind him]


SCENE2: DAY 4 HOURS 30 MINUTES LATER
EXTERIOR: ON A BROKEN DOWN TRUCK IN FRONT OF A SHOP
A sorrowful theme begins to play underground as camera gives a shot to a little girl sweeping at the front of a shop and Nasa sitting beside a pack of smoozy yoghurt on a broken down truck in a street; her tears roll down her cheeks.

NASA
God; you know that I’ve told him the truth: that the condoms belong to Jessica who doesn’t want another pregnancy: since they have 2 sets of twins already. No; I will go back. It’s my matrimonial home.
[She stands up. She walks away in a camera long shot]


SCENE3: DAY
EXTERIOR: NASA WORKING ON THE GENERATOR
The sorrowful theme continues as camera views Nasa squatting beside the generator, looses the plug and the foam filter covering, shedding tears. She works on the head of the plug still shedding tears.

INTERIOR: ZACK SLEEPS IN THE DARK
ZACK
[He wakes up suddenly as the light comes up.
Wao! Light?
[He scrolls his eyes in awe and he rushes out of bed]
Then Zicky must be is around!
Zicky! Zicky boy! Are you back? Zicky! Zicky where are you? Zicky
[He gets to dining table, sees the smoozy yoghurt]
Hnmm, smoozy: this is my favorite yoghurt.
[He grabs 1 quickly, sucks excitedly while moving to the front door]

EXTERIOR:
Camera views the working generator, tools lying beside it; the oil stains on the floor and the piece of dirty rag, no Zicky.
ZACK
O boy! Where are you? Zicky!
[Zack arrives to a halt seeing Nasa on a ladder repairing the outside light while sobbing.]

ZACK
What are you doing there? Eh? Didn’t I ask you never to return to this compound again?
[The half consumed yoghurt still in his hands as he advances slowly]

ZACK
I said what are you doing here?
[He barks advancing more menacingly]
Sorrowful theme starts playing underground

...To be continued next week

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