This husband and wife couple I have become close to,do not use deodorant and the smell is obvious.They are also new immigrants.
I have been in a workplace ( in my shait packing days) where a fellow Nigerian was being made fun of by co workers for smelling,I could smell her too but she belonged to deeper life and was very unfriendly so I never got close to her but behind her back people ( americans and non Americans) made horrible remarks and likened her offensive odor to her being African.I am African too and it kinda hurt.
Over the years I have met many other Nigerians that simply refuse to wear deodorants.
One of them hosted a party and she stunk up her own party and nobody told her a word yet everybody smelled her that summer and just endured it.

But I want to help this young couple badly,for their own good.

I don't want this young couple that I am very fond of to become an object of ridicule in their environment that's if they haven't already.They are also looking for jobs and I fear this may hurt them if an intended employer smells an offensive body odor.
But how do I introduce them to deodorants?
What is the best way to do this without embarrassing them or hurting their feelings?

Make it a gift

You know this is one of my pet peves. I always wonder how they don't suffocate themselves with the stench. Their sense of smell must be very poor. Even if you don't want to use deodorant, mentholated powder nko?

Solution: approach the wife armed with a deodorant and ask her to use it. That right now the one she is using is not so good as she is still having body odour. She will tell her husband and he will try it as well. That is how you will save the day. No one likes to be a nuisance and made fun of. Just make sure you buy a good deodorant for her.

The best way to do it, it's just TELL them.

First impression, they might feel offended but after that, they will be greatful to you.

As a NIgerian,how do you feel when the foreigners laugh at them and tag them to have an African smell. D you just sit and feel bad for them?

Pls take action ASAP.

ATMC: Make it a gift

That was what my best friend advised and I almost gave them that for Christmas but then I thought if that would be enough to encourage the habit of daily use or shaving under the pits which is what I would want especially the woman to do.
This is not easy at all

If u are friendly with her, tell her her story as if it happened to someoneelse n see how she reacts then broach d topic, do u grab?

baby_123: You know this is one of my pet peves. I always wonder how they don't suffocate themselves with the stench. Their sense of smell must be very poor. Even if you don't want to use deodorant, mentholated powder nko?

Solution: approach the wife armed with a deodorant and ask her to use it. That right now the one she is using is not so good as she is still having body odour. She will tell her husband and he will try it as well. That is how you will save the day. No one likes to be a nuisance and made fun of. Just make sure you buy a good deodorant for her.

This may just be what I'll have to do
It is still tough
can you imagine driving up to someone's apartment to practically tell them that they smell?

One of them was hospitalized and I went to visit them at the hospital
It was so bad,I was so embarrassed
The doctors and nurses going in and out and I was just thinking what the discussion at the nurse's station would be about the smelly Nigerian patient and their smelly family and friends.

nwando:

This may just be what I'll have to do
It is still tough
can you imagine driving up to someone's house to practically tell them that they smell?

Even if she fights you, trust me she will take the correction. I don't know how people can prove they don't know that they don't smell fresh or clean. I won't even be able to stand myself. I have done this before by the way and it worked perfectly. We are still friends. I am a very direct person too. And if you don't like correction then I leave you alone, as I don't want to offend my insides.smh.

baby_123:

Even if she fights you, trust me she will take the correction. I don't know how people can prove they don't know that they don't smell fresh or clean. I won't even be able to stand myself. I have done this before by the way and it worked perfectly. We are still friends. I am a very direct person too. And if you don't like correction then I leave you alone, as I don't want to offend my insides.smh.

Tell me
What exactly did you do
How did you introduce the topic

This couple is younger than me so I believe I could pull this off better than if they were older

I cannot understand too how people cannot smell themselves
I went shopping the other day and while I was trying on clothes at the store I was like OMG,I forgot to wear deodorant which happens occasionally when I wear black and want to prevent the deodorant from smearing on the outfit so I rub the thing after dressing but in a rush I forget.
I asked my daughter to sniff me and see if she smelled anything,she said no,I still was so uncomfortable and rushed back in the car and rubbed some from one I keep in the glove compartment.

nwando:

Tell me
What exactly did you do
How did you introduce the topic

As I arrive, I take out the deodorant. Ehen, nwando come, take this. The one you are using is not working too well so try this one. I use it myself as well. . And then we move unto other conversations like, ehen what did you even cOok? I am hungry jare. If she comes back to ask if she smells, you say no, but you are not smelling as fresh as you should. It is also unisex so oga can use it if he wants as well. Try "Secret"

baby_123:

As I arrive, I take out the deodorant. Ehen, nwando come, take this. The one you are using is not working too well so try this one. I use it myself as well. . And then we move unto other conversations like, ehen what did you even cOok? I am hungry jare. If she comes back to ask if she smells, you say no, but you are not smelling as fresh as you should. It is also unisex so oga can use it if he wants as well. Try "Secret"

@nwando can u be this direct lol

In fact I am calling them up today to schedule a visit
I have been in this situation too many times and said nothing
There was a Nigerian pastor and his wife,perhaps the worst stench of all
As soon as you stepped into their home,the stench was unbelievable
The whole house was spotless though,you could eat off their floors but the whole family had a very terrible body odor and I knew them for 3 solid years and never said a word

nwando: In fact I am calling them up today to schedule a visit
I have been in this situation too many times and said nothing
There was a Nigerian pastor and his wife,perhaps the worst stench of all
As soon as you stepped into their home,the stench was unbelievable
The whole house was spotless though,you could eat off their floors but the whole family had a very terrible body odor and I knew them for 3 solid years and never said a word

Funny thing is a lot of them are very neat people.

ATMC: @nwando can u be this direct lol

It is better not to linger and start tripping over yourself explaining what you mean. If you are short and cut to the chase without being demeaning with long stories describing how and where they smelled. All the better.

ATMC: @nwando can u be this direct lol

To a close friend yes,I can be pretty blunt
Nwando aka babyosisi
But the wife here is perhaps 10 years my junior and the husband maybe a little less and they lookup to me as a big sis
I want to do this without appearing condescending
I have rendered some help to them at various times and I don't want it to appear that I am now taking that liberty to talk down on them and tell them they smell
But I need to do this
I would hate for some American to tell it to them in a way that could be devastating to them

So how many deodorants should I take with me?
One for the man,one for the woman?
Should I talk to them together or just speak with the wife only?
How do I ask the man to excuse us?
Should I put itin a gift bag or just whip it out of my handbag


Kai this is not easy o

Gosh
I hope they are not on nairaland,they are a very young couple

nwando: So how many deodorants should I take with me?

Gosh
I hope they are not on nairaland,they are a very young couple

The wife is the target so one is enough. Once the wife accepts, the whole house will smell fresher and cleaner. She will introduce it to the rest of her family. Just like if you know a friend that is always stained at that time of the month and you know a better alternative, wouldn't you tell her?

Tell the wife when she is alone. Just drop by, don't make any appointment to see the both of them. On your way there call to see if she is home. If she is alone, all the better. You should know the man's schedule by now.

baby_123:

The wife is the target so one is enough. Once the wife accepts, the whole house will smell fresher and cleaner. She will introduce it to the rest of her family. Just like if you know a friend that is always stained at that time of the month and you know a better alternative, wouldn't you tell her?

Ok dear
Oya to the rest of my questions,what say ye
I added more

How I wish I will call and the husband is away
That will be my best case scenario

If they r on nairaland the better na... I feel u on being looked upon and all dt, just do it as u r convinced

nwando:

Ok dear
Oya to the rest of my questions,what say ye
I added more

How I wish I will call and the husband is away
That will be my best case scenario

Answered on top. You can also call to check up on her often. Once she says hubby is out, that will be your time to make it happen. Just stop by the store and tell her you are dropping by. Whip it out of your handbag. A gift of it is insulting imho.

Dont forget to get them mints as well, because i'm sure your nose is wondering why their mouths are smelling when they're talking to you.

You might as well start selling house cleaner, breath mints, deodorant, perfume, body spray, alum( for cleaning snail), kaun for ogbono, and other clean smelling products like air freshener
( for when they want to knock you out in their house with their body odour), etc etc.

Why not make some small money while you're in the business. That way, you accomplish more- your "friends" stop smelling, you start selling, and the whole world will thank you for reducing the hole in the ozone layer.

baby_123:

The wife is the target so one is enough. Once the wife accepts, the whole house will smell fresher and cleaner. She will introduce it to the rest of her family. Just like if you know a friend that is always stained at that time of the month and you know a better alternative, wouldn't you tell her?

Tell the wife when she is alone. Just drop by, don't make any appointment to see the both of them. On your way there call to see if she is home. If she is alone, all the better. You should know the man's schedule by now.

Weekend will not be good then
They'll both be home
He works during the weekdays and I will look and find my day off and hopefully he will be at work then I call and show up.

There is a chance we will meet at an event tomorrow
Can I call her aside at that ceremony and tell her about it there or will that appear awkward?
What I will hate is for her to say to her husband
"Frank can you imagine sister Ify said I have body odor and that I should use this deodorant?"

* see stalking and monitoring*

Some people must work for boko haram.

Lol

nwando:

Weekend will not be good then
They'll both be home
He works during the weekdays and I will look and find my day off and hopefully he will be at work then I call and show up.

There is a chance we will meet at an event tomorrow
Can I call her aside at that ceremony and tell her about it there or will that appear awkward?

Depends on your relationship with them. At the event if she is smelling tell her that you want to go for a bathroom break if she wants to come. Carry your glove compartment deodorant or one that comes out of the holes of the applicator liquid like and offer it to her. Use it and offer it to her.lmao. Tell her its the best one, and its good for a woman to freshen up occasionally. I say its better when she is alone really. She will be less embarassed.

ATMC: Lol

You dey laugh?
I have been faced by similar situations many times before and did nothing
If I sit to rationalize all this,I will simply retreat again and say nothing because I would hate to offend
But then If I am smelling I would want someone to tell me and help me not to smell,that is my motivation here

I will get back and let you folks know if I was able to do it tomorrow but keep the suggestions coming.

Ko easy ra ra o

nwando:


But then If I am smelling I would want someone to tell me and help me not to smell,that is my motivation here

You've already told us you dont smell, although all your friends and family do.

So, just focus on those smelly people stinking up your nostrils, and how you can get them to stop smelling.

nwando: I will get back and let you folks know if I was able to do it tomorrow but keep the suggestions coming.

Ko easy ra ra o

Tomorrow is sunday, so i assume you're referring to church.

Are people safe, because obviously you want to earn your pay.

tpia@:
Dont forget to get them mints as well, because i'm sure your nose is wondering why their mouths are smelling when they're talking to you.

You might as well start selling house cleaner, breath mints, deodorant, perfume, body spray, alum( for cleaning snail), kaun for ogbono, and other clean smelling products like air freshener
( for when they want to knock you out in their house with their body odour), etc etc.

Why not make some small money while you're in the business. That way, you accomplish more- your "friends" stop smelling, you start selling, and the whole world will thank you for reducing the hole in the ozone layer.

@ op,since both of them can't seem to smell each other, someone needs to tell them and that someone is you. If they are smart enough, they'll sniff themselves and thank you later.

Rotmyt:

@ op,since both of them can't seem to smell each other, someone needs to tell them and that someone is you. If they are smart enough, they'll sniff themselves and thank you later.

I have decided that I will do it,what I am planning now is the least offensive way to accomplish that.
Tell them I must
My mind is made up on that

Obviously your mind is not made up on how to get proper work outside posting on nl.

My own question is so people who smell dont know that they do? Its a difficult thing but its easier if they are younger and look up to you.My mum told 2 of her shop girls.And bought them deodorant.I guess cos she is older they knew it was more like an admonishment and so did not take it personal.