jennykadry: Reference indeed. Let me catch any woman here that will bash a man for hitting a woman in this section of the forum.

This is the reason why I don't post much in this section. The things I have read especially from people I "respect" is .......I don't even know what to even add there sef

naijababe:


That is not a very politically correct statement.

chaircover: I am referencing this thread too, because if I understand right, we are saying that in some instances that it is ok for a man to beat a woman with koboko! and if a man is pushed to the wall by whoever, man or woman, its OK to use his fists.

Thank God we are all different and our anger thresholds are different. So someone with a short fuse can kobokolise his wife because she used foul language (haba shebi abuse can be physical, emotional, verbal and so on) and one can swap one for the other naw!

I am surprised at debrief and I am "singularing" her out because she has been through violence and has worn the t-shirt and I would have expected that she will be the first person to be against any form of violence & to suggest other ways to deal with altercations but it is those of us who have never received a slap from anyone before who are horrified at the level of violence that this family have shown.

. . . . And for the record No one has said what the woman did was right and yes she needed to be punished . . . but beaten to stupor & bleeding Is that the only way that she could have been reprimanded? what a family of thugs!

chaircover: I am referencing this thread too, because if I understand right, we are saying that in some instances that it is ok for a man to beat a woman with koboko! and if a man is pushed to the wall by whoever, man or woman, its OK to use his fists.

Thank God we are all different and our anger thresholds are different. So someone with a short fuse can kobokolise his wife because she used foul language (haba shebi abuse can be physical, emotional, verbal and so on) and one can swap one for the other naw!

I am surprised at debrief and I am "singularing" her out because she has been through violence and has worn the t-shirt and I would have expected that she will be the first person to be against any form of violence & to suggest other ways to deal with altercations but it is those of us who have never received a slap from anyone before who are horrified at the level of violence that this family have shown.

. . . . And for the record No one has said what the woman did was right and yes she needed to be punished . . . but beaten to stupor & bleeding Is that the only way that she could have been reprimanded? what a family of thugs!

IbnTimothy:
From your story,
The man has given his family far too much licence into his home in total disregard for his wife.
Beating up his sister is trivial; I will have her arrested so that she will learn not to stray beyond her boundaries. Even my mum has no right to come and dish out orders in my home, she has to channel her complaints through me, and trust me to handle things my way or get out. What I owe my parents is care and respect. They don’t have to stay in my house if they won't let me be.

Every Nigerian need to know that your first family becomes your extended family the moment you get married.
That said: I will also make my wife understand I didn't just drop from the trees; they were in my life before her.

AjanleKoko:

That's how you know pipol wey no get wife for house.
Na so e easy?

@Topic,
Any man that uses physical violence on his wife is definitely certifiable. A complete nutter.

A-40:

Na u sabi! Any woman that wants to isolate me from my family has something to hide IMO! For a wife to insult my elder sister it means she can insult me too

Metalgoong:
This is one of those moments when feminists suffer momentary dementia . .
Now, they all are happy because their sister in law was beaten to pulp. . .
ooh, the woman beater is now a hero ( he is no longer an animal, but a REAL man) . . He did the right thing by defending his wife!
Hypocrites! . . tomorrow same group of women will be using some selected bible passages to deceive the gullible ones!

chaircover: So my eyes are now deceiving me. The man is now being reprimanded. . . . .Okay ooooooo!

AjanleKoko:

You kinda write like coogar.

chaircover:
. . . .dear wifey my little advise to you is to just be getting your aboniki and plaster ready cos that koboko is going to be used on you soon thats if it already hasnt been used. I don say my own!

dayokanu:

You sef dey see am? A man is allowed to beat a woman if he is defending another woman.

Thats one thing about people Its only bad when you are the victim

Sisi_Kill: I have some questions. . .

Will the beating be okay if the sister was younger and/or unmarried?

Sisi_Kill:
Should the brother have kept his hands to himself only because she is older than him and because he wants his wife to enjoy her marriage?

Sisi_Kill:
Is the sister slapping the brother justified because she is older?

Sisi_Kill:
Is the the Sister justified in fighting the wife because she is just the wife?!

Sisi_Kill:
Do we expect her to act differently if the wife was her own sister?

Sisi_Kill:
Will the scenario be better if it was man vs man or woman vs woman?

Sisi_Kill:
If the answer to all of that is NO why then are we using the qualifiers. . .married woman, older sister, sister in law, younger brother, man, woman etc? What we are inadvertently saying is that it is non-violent acts are limited to just these people. Anyone outside of that. . .it's a free for all!!

chaircover: I hear you debrief and my apologies for saying you edited your post. I could have sworn that in your first post you said nothing about the man but obviously I was mistaken and I am sorry for that.

What I am trying to say is that violence should be a NO NO! Why because there are no defined lines and like most vices, once they start are very very difficult to stop. No one deserves to be beaten with koboko. This is 2013 and we are not animals.

The sister clearly did wrong but 2 wrongs dont make a right. I still 100% believe that this situation could have been handled much better.

damiso:

You know i entered someone's car in Nigeria and i saw a koboko.I asked the driver why do you have a koboko in the car and he was like its for lastma,okada,VIO and all the sundry maluus(cows) on lagos roads .I was like and your oga knows you use koboko on people?He was like yes ke.I was like Mr..... abeg when you are driving me around dont use koboko on another human being.Pls. I was truly horrified(i dont want to believe that you can flog lastma sha).

Violence of any sort should be abhored.The man should have just ignored his sister.Silence they say is the best answer for a ..........Or better still call the husband to come and carry his property.Then later (not in front of the wife) tell her in clear terms that he did not like her conduct.As much as i tell my mum off on behalf of her sis in law,its not the sis in law prerogative to then insult or beat up my mum.As much as me and my siblings will say mummy you too crossed your boundary, i would not be happy for my uncle to flog her.I trust my family sha,their own drama na all mouth .

D_BestDoc: I was wondering what kind of a man could beat up his mother.just discovered karma is at work in your family.if your mother could beat up her mother inlaw when she had the chance to, then i see no reason why you wont beat her mercilessly cos she must receive what she gave in hundred fold.its perfect she has sons that reason like her.

ileobatojo:

Exactly! You and I hold similar positions on this and we have been consistent with this stand on these boards over time. So people trying to scream hypocrisy probably have a problem with reading. There have been several threads where this issue was brought up including that controversial Jenny thread where we put the blame on a female poster for initiating the physical altercation so what are we talking about here?

If I beat my husband first, why would I be upset if he beat me back? I wouldnt even go and say it outside because i know the blame is on me! So just because I'm a woman and 'a man must never beat a woman', I have free rein to go around physically assaulting men?

naijababe:

I don't think anyone on this thread believes the sister was right to go and threaten the wife in her house but the wife comes out of this looking much worse by letting hubby assault his sister so badly. Would she have condoned the same degree of assault on her mother or sister?

Michky: What should she have done eh? Gone out to seperate the serious fight between brother and sister and get hurt in the process? Look, lets remove wife from this matter. To me, its just a normal brother-sister fight which would probably have been happening since child hood.