Don't ask me why am asking this question

But I really need to know the Pro and Cons of living with your in laws.

I will ask you Roki are they moving in?

Dancing ETI- GEEE, let me finish first...

trekkie: there are no pros only cons; if u can avoid this, do so.

True but let somebody lie atleast.

What do you mean

Over familiarity causes discontent. Have some pride and get your own place, even if it is a room and parlour. At least it is your own space. No one can come and chase you or disrespect you.

There's only one pro I can think of and that's regarding giving a helping hand with the kids.

rokiatu: Don't ask me why am asking this question

But I really need to know the Pro and Cons of living with your in laws.

lmao!!

don't kill 'em o!!
that's all i have to say!

kandiikane: There's only one pro I can think of and that's regarding giving a helping hand with the kids.

Good one.

There are a some pros but I think the cons far out weigh the pros even if they are not as many in number; they are significantly more important in the scale of things. For example the ptential for conflict over kitchen duties out weighs the benefits of have someone else prepare the meals.

Unless its a temporary stay, not a very palatable course of action.

baby_123: Over familiarity causes discontent. Have some pride and get your own place, even if it is a room and parlour. At least it is your own space. No one can come and chase you or disrespect you.

It ain't the matter of not been able to have your own place.

What if your Husband is out of town for a while and you are pregnant, and this is your first pregnancy and he don't want you to live alone while hes gone he suggest you live with his mom till he return what will you do?

MsDarkSkin:

lmao!!

don't kill 'em o!!
that's all i have to say!

You bad girl, imma kill you. This ain't abt me trust me.

It depends on d PIL involved, some are very pleasurable to live with while some are very difficult.
My MIL had lived with us and it was d most wonderful experience i've had in my whole married years, very hospitable, very interesting and pleasurable, very wonderful woman, infact, im looking forward to having her back, we all want to have her live with us, so we normally hijack her from one another. Im even thinking of going to where she is now to bring her to my place.
Awwwww, oh Lord, pls, i dont want to lose my MIL now.

rokiatu:

It ain't the matter of not been able to have your own place.

What if your Husband is out of time for a while and you are pregnant, and this is your first pregnancy and he don't want you to live alone while hes gone he suggest you live with his mom till he return what will you do?

I will stay with my mum or fly her in to stay with me pending hubby's absence. Sorry, I can't stay with inlaws. All the flaws hubby tolerates and even thinks is cute, will not be accomodated by inlaws. . You want to go to inlaws as a pregnant, even cranky/clingy lady. Hmm, I hope your MIL is not the type that farmed till she gave birth. Visit? No problem. Live? No please. It would even take a lot to actually live with my mum. Living in my own space is something I can't even sacrifice on, anymore.

baby_123:
I will stay with my mum or fly her in to stay with me pending hubby's absence. Sorry, I can't stay with inlaws. All the flaws hubby tolerates and even thinks is cute, will not be accomodated by inlaws. . You want to go to inlaws as a pregnant, even cranky/clingy lady. Hmm, I hope your MIL is not the type that farmed till she gave birth. Visit? No problem. Live? No please. It would even take a lot to actually live with my mum. Living in my own space is something I can't even sacrifice on, anymore.

so would you suggest I kick my mom out because of a woman. Don't be impossible dear.

my grandmom lived with us before she passed away - no big deal....she had her own apt with housemaids in the boy quarter... i don't recall any major problems.

As much as possible don't live with them.

It is bad enough living with a woman with their wahala. I can't imagine living with my in-laws in the same house. Not even my own family members. I like my peace and quiet and don't want to be battling with characters from both sides in the same house.

If you love your husband, you will respect his mom.

There are no CONS....

if your husband is an only son, the sisters are either married or stay in diff schools. they ve got a block of flats of which your husband occupies one himself though cooking is general. and lest i forget, ur husband runs the family business. would you consider staying with ur inlaws even if they are very warm people?

I don't think I'll like to do it because living with any adult that is not your spouse is so difficult it is easy to get on each other's nerves why destroy a good relationship you've built over the years. What God has joined together let no one put asunder. Even the children of the union it will come a time when they must leave the nest for just the 2 of you.

it depends on d in-laws involved.

kandiikane: There's only one pro I can think of and that's regarding giving a helping hand with the kids.

shikena!

What context? If you live in a mansion, it might not be too bad but one room, two rooms etc.
Context 2 How is your relationship with your inlaws? Good, Bad, Fair, Enemies
Context 3 Reason? Are they sick? Some old folks come to Lagos for treatment at special hospitals?

PROS

If your inlaws are not lazy, they help with kids, you can go on dates without kids.
If you are super olodo they can help with kids homework
If you can't cook, good food for everyone and time to learn if the inlaws are good sha
Building a legacy and a relationship with family it could come in handy in future


CONS
Added cost of living
Depending on the relationship it could be a nightmare
You cant argue with your husband/wife unrestrained. That could be a good or a very bad thing
No privacy. Our society loves secrets due to evil folks, instance if you are building a house in Lagos or planning investment. Your info is out there.
No privacy. Woman can't dress seductively at home
No privacy. Can't walk around naked anymore if you are into that (assuming you have no kids)
Child Sexual predators can be a grandpa, uncle, cousin etc, extra security needed

obowunmi: If you love your husband, you will respect his mom.

There are no CONS....

thank you, sometimes, when i hear or read about how some women talk about their in-laws, especially, their MIL, i often wonder if they really love their hubby and if they realise that d woman gave birth to that their hubby b4 they are able to marry him........smh.
I just want everywoman to remember that every DIL is a potential MIL.
May God help us all.

trekkie: there are no pros only cons; if u can avoid this, do so.

Gbam!!!

If you are broke,u can beg money.

greatgod2012:



thank you, sometimes, when i hear or read about how some women talk about their in-laws, especially, their MIL, i often wonder if they really love their hubby and if they realise that d woman gave birth to that their hubby b4 they are able to marry him........smh.
I just want everywoman to remember that every DIL is a potential MIL.
May God help us all.

God bless you with the line 3.
Trust me ALL these MIL haters are very oblivious of that FACT. Their potential DILs will definitely hold the same view about them.

rokiatu: Don't ask me why am asking this question

But I really need to know the Pro and Cons of living with your in laws.

Pros:
* if you have children, they get to know their grandparents, which is in my opinion is very important.
* most grandparents find joy in seeing their grandchildren grow up
* if they are not too old, they can help out especially if you have little ones
* you don't have to worry about going to pay them a visit since they are now under your nose
* it could benefit your family financially

Cons:
* It’s quite an adjustment getting to live and know your partner, and now you’ve added another variable
* you are now outnumbered in your home
* it could have a negative financial impact
* if you have adequate space, privacy may not be an issue

Nevertheless, the pros outweigh the cons. The relationship will obviously go through stages of forming (conflicts), storming (more conflicts), norming (understanding how to treat each other), performing (ripping the benefits). The time this all takes would depend on all the parties involved.

All CONS, no PROS

Stay away from my house and come only when you are invited.
Thats the only guarantee we will see our grandkids

rokiatu:

It ain't the matter of not been able to have your own place.

What if your Husband is out of town for a while and you are pregnant, and this is your first pregnancy and he don't want you to live alone while hes gone he suggest you live with his mom till he return what will you do?

Go stay with your inlaws. At least someone will be nearby during emergency.

Cook for you.
Sometimes do your laundry
Always checking on you because you are carrying their grand child.
Teach you the culture or language
Teach you some cuisine your husband loves while he was growing up
Give you his child hood experience....


For cons,

You might not be able to eat the food you want at a particular time.
Minimum space.

That's all I can think of now.

Above all, respect your self and always remember you are the guest.