Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? - Romance - Nairaland
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12 Signs You Have Commitment Phobia And How To Fix it / Are Guys Scared Of Dating Or Marrying Working-Class Ladies? / Why Do Men Get Scared Of Commitment& Responsibilities (2) (3) (4)
| Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by Canibus: 4:46pm On Apr 08, 2008 |
Commitment Still Scares Me. Why? I am a good looking guy of 23, but i wonder why I still see commitment as a big problem. It scares the shit out of me. Why is this and what is the way to eradicate it? Because I really want to enjoy a very stable relationship. Maybe is the reason why I don't waste time on toasting,if after[b]2 weeks and no green light[/b], I scram off. Please sincerely speaking open up Nairalanders. |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by sistajay(f): 5:47pm On Apr 08, 2008 |
Vex for wetin? you'll spend all your time bed hoppin, if you don't learn to commit. You will commit when you fall in love, cos love changes everythin. |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by ztyle(m): 5:56pm On Apr 08, 2008 |
Sista-jay - Sorry to Ask wetin this guy dey yarn? i confuse oh!  |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by chinda3: 5:59pm On Apr 08, 2008 |
2WEEKS AND NO GREEN LIGHT sorry oooo,but are u trying to tell us u r a player or wat?  |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by ssRhino: 6:01pm On Apr 08, 2008 |
IF within 2 weeks of talking to a lady, u already "u scram off" then, u surely not yet ready to even date, cos i am sure that if you meet a lady and she give you a green light in less than 2 weeks, you will come back here and complain on how cheap she could be, na wa oh, what exactly do u want. You can't be talking of commitment, if you cant even scale thru the hurdle of toasting the babe right. Check within and find why you are not patient enuf for something you sure could be good. |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by Joey82(m): 6:28pm On Apr 08, 2008 |
@poster u're scared of commitment cos u r still a baby @ heart. dont worry, u'll soon grow into a man. what defines a man is patience with bold and giant strides which u lack. |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by Dreloaded(f): 6:32pm On Apr 08, 2008 |
Hopefully you'll commit to the Aids ward |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by TheSly: 1:20pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
IF within 2 weeks of talking to a lady, u already "u scram off" then, u surely not yet ready to even date,Who has the time for long thing? 2 weeks is even too much!  A day would be better!   |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by SamMilla1(m): 1:27pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
@poster, I think you are not yet ready to commit yourself to anybody, A good lady deserves more than two months to give her green light unless you met her on a night club. It does not mean that both of you will not be going out together but remember we are talking about commitment. This is another human being with a different brain chemistry. Forget the similar physiology. You don't have to give them time to make up their minds, Get matured. I wish you goodluck on your next try. Canibus: Remember, stop abusing people for their opinions. All you have to do is to report to the board moderator.Its her job to decide what to do with the post.If you keep sounding like this, people will be scared of giving you advice. |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by dobberma27(m): 1:45pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
lets all give the brother a break he asked a question so we shld be offering solutions,anyway it does happen to most guys even me but i believe all it takes is time you wld definitely find dat gal dat wld keep u cool u get  |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by mikkyphp(m): 1:58pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
@poster i feel your pain, i used to be grossly petrified though for other reasons. the answer: just get a girl that seems to fit fairly into your ideal sppecs for a gf/wiffy, then take it step by step. chiks could be very annoying, but you'll only get worked up and feel like wantin-out if you think like a "MAN"! thats where you need patience to work.take your time, dont speak any words at such moments or you may just mess everything up. try to calmly see d situation thru' her lenses and discuss your disaffection with her calmly.thats if she's reasonable sha try not to lose your temper. and with time she'll also try to understand u and u her. but she has to be someone you like o if not, you'll lose your patience easily. , to be continued, |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by uspry1(f): 2:10pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
Poster It means you are not ready to be committed to your girl yet! Have you thought to sit down and figure out what kind of woman you want for your wife?. . .finding the characteristics of wife you look for?. . .weighs PROS and CON about relationship or flaws you try to work out? Here is helpful tips on the following link at below: 10 Insights You should take steps into serious relationship before you get marry her/him https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-95533.0.html From that link above has summarized at below for you to find in order to make the strong relationship between two people connect that is based on: [list] [li]Trust[/li] [li]Spirituality[/li] [li]4 Characters[/li] [list] [li]Humility[/li] [li]Kindness[/li] [li]Responsibility[/li] [li]Happiness[/li] [/list] [li]Personal Hygiene[/li] [li]Communication Skill[/li] [li]Personal Habits[/li] [li]Strong Connections[/li] [list] [li]Good Chemistry and Compatibility[/li] [li]Shared Common Interest[/li] [li]Shared Common Life Goal[/li] [li]Deeper Emotional[/li] [li]Sexual Compatibility[/li] (refer the knowledge of sexuality) [li]Agreed Financial Obligations/Compromise Equally[/li] [/list] [/list] Don't let your mind clouds you or fear/scare take over you!!! Remember LOVE CONQUERS ALL!!! |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by Dreloaded(f): 2:30pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
Rofl All gone |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by SweetT1: 2:32pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
@D-reloaded I recommended you for a nairaland moderator. |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by Easybaby(f): 2:37pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
wetin this guy dey yarn? He yarn say he no fit commit to a girl [color=#990000] |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by Nobody: 2:53pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
Easybaby: no he yarn say i'm no fit toast girl pass 2 weeks. na craig david style im dey do - i met this girl on monday . . took her for a drink on tuesday . . we made love by wednesday. . anything longer than that and he's walking away. . . |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by TheSly: 3:00pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
He yarn say he no fit commit to a girlMake he go commit to a bwoi na? abi ? |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by wildfire(m): 3:12pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
Hi guys, This our nairaland brother really needed an advise or a clue to his problem, i wonder why on earth Nigerians won't change for the better. He expected you to give him something he can hold/rely on to make a dramatic change of his situation rather you guys were just disappointing him by not focusing on the topic, though some nairalanders are very very understanding, i commend those that are very understanding, those who try to help people that needs it, not those that uses it as weapon. Please nairalanders try to help guys who are in need, God bless!!!  |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by mikkyphp(m): 3:14pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
@canibus heheheehehehehehehehehehehehehehe well, true story filthy mouth i must say. this type ehn, if u come house without money one day, kai kalawai, she go fry your ass, L ;DMCAO @wildfire no mind dem jare, na busy body dem be |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by bawomolo(m): 3:30pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
You will commit when you fall in love, because love changes everythin. ha ha ha, yeah right. |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by Sisikill: 3:31pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
You're 23. What's your hurry? |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by hisgrace2: 3:33pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
because of yah head and yah d i c k wey be like d same, |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by tglaz(m): 3:37pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
I perceive you are a pessimist?If I am right,please take a dive for the better. |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by frank316(m): 4:00pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
i think you have some insecurites that is making you withdraw after trial. have you ever, really dated a girl? i mean are you still a virgin? another reason could be that you are scared that they dont really like you, their response is not encouraging you and you are scared of rejection. you are turned off by words like 1) i have a boyfriend 2) i am not interested 3) why do you ask? please i am not in the mood to talk 4) i dont have time for all these tings you are talking about. My man, slow and steady wins the race. bring out your time for a woman and dont mind her nagative response (i call them jelly walls) if you try with one and it does not work out learn fronmyour mistake and try another and for Gods sake stop being scared of commitment, it is one of the best ways you can enjoy life. |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by Bblak(f): 4:15pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
@Poster Take your time, Prepare your mind for committment and you shall be committed.Gdluck |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by jkpretty(f): 4:27pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
U give up being scared when u find the right girl u can't afford missing. |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by kingkams(m): 5:02pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
Bros, all you have to do is make up your mind and go for it BIG TIME once you find the right one. You might be suprised at the outcome. Remember, have faith in yourself and your ability. |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by mikkyphp(m): 5:47pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
this line always works if u don't know how to toast a girl: "I love you talk your own" |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by ashe2(f): 5:51pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
u are not just ready who knows u jus mite neva be till u die and dont scared u wont be d last or the first one to be not jus ready u neva know a lot of people are not just ready but wen u are u wnt nid anyone to tell u i jus hope u wont be pound foolish and penny wise and let dat rite gal gou jus mite end up with mixed bred jezebel and karashika!! come to think of it its bin long i heard or watched dat film |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by Pennywise(m): 5:52pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
Quote from: Canibus on Today at 01:17:44 PM @D-RELOADED-- u can see why i said no stupid comments,WHAT DO You MEAN 'AIDS WARD'Statements like these make you think that some threads are actually traps that have been set up in wait for the usual customers. So one has to tread carefully. The poster's comment (regarding a 2 week ultimatum) surely bring's him out as a seasoned player even at 23. Some guys will include a budget and vary it according to the girl's percieved worth within a given time frame. It is hard to blame these guys because there is so much love scam going on. On the other hand well intentioned genuine relationships frequently don't go any where because the girl chose to be clever by half. My guy, I think you are in serious trouble and this is no joke. I however hope you will get someone to whom you feel connected before you are 30 otherwise your life and carrier is screwed. |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by dee02(m): 7:53pm On Apr 09, 2008 |
frank 3.16: what is all dis story above now?IRRELEVANT JARGONS! @poster you are scared of commitment because you are not ready mikkyphp: what are you on about?hez not asking for chat up lines dimwit! |
| Re: Why Am I Still Scared Of Commitment? by almondjoy(f): 5:18am On Apr 10, 2008 |
@poster You don't have to go about toasting. You may have a serious problem on your hands without knowing it. Let's go back to the classroom please! Listen students. Committment has to do with a solid, healthy, psychological foundation beginning from infancy. If people have failed you in the past. . . you learn not to have close ties. It is called habituation. Unfortunately, there is no cure for this kind of dysfunction. It has a lot to do with trust or love. Most people who were not given attention in infancy and early childhood. . polygamous set ups especially. . . never realize these kinds of goals. They keep jumping from girlfriend to girlfriend and woman to woman without any satisfaction in the end. It is recommended. . . by me of course, that new mothers should breast feed their male infants especially for at least 2 years to enable them learn to trust their people in their environment to a certain degree. They that need more than the female infants as you can see around you. Men have more dysfunctional relationships than women. Trust in this case meaning the ablity to maintain loving relationships for extended periods of time. . . not with your heart and soul! Na Erikson talk am ooooooooooooooh No be me!
@Topic So, please this is some serious problem. . . please find a way to commit to someone before it is too late. As you get older, it can only get worse. One of the dangers of polygamy I say. Too many children and not enough love! Too many children growing up lost. This also happens in monogamous homes, don't get me wrong. But I think this kind of behavioural science. . . .can only explain why a lot of people cannot commit to one person. They grew up in such environments where there were no clear cut boundaries in relationships. One father. . .12 mothers, 1 biological father, 2 step fathers 6 half brothers, 1 full sister 4 runaway mothers with 8 different new husbands. . . more step upon step children. . . . and so on and so forth. . . it is not surprising that one will find it hard to commit to anybody if you have spent the whole of your life trying to figure out who is who. @poster Not saying polygamy is your problem, but I feel that is why many children all over the world grow up as dysfunctional adults unable to commit in relationships. Unstable role models in their lives. When that is not the case. . .drugs and alcohol or some form of psychosis must be present. Please check which you have and start the desired therapy. Always willing to lend a helping hand to the lost and weary!  |
(,if i were to be God i will strike you 50 times for such a blasphemy you[b] NONENTITY[/b]I Need Ur Help Ooooo. Only Mature Minds Pls. U Just Have To Read This. / What Is The Difference Between Friendship And Relationship? / Can The Daughter Of A Rich Man Fall In Love With A Broke Guy?
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