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Who Invented The Molue? A Satire - Literature - Nairaland

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Who Invented The Molue? A Satire by nuwell(m): 3:09pm On Apr 19, 2013
I guess the joke's on me now. A few weeks back, I came to the awe-inspiring realization that the big, Mercedes Benz 911-powered commuter buses a.k.a Molue, that were once (and on some routes still are) the 'rave' of the moment on Lagos roads are actually...

…*drum roll, fanfare*...

...'Made in Nigeria!'

‘What an astonishing discovery!’ Yeah, I can almost hear you say 'duh' or 'eh hen, wetin come happen?' Its okay. I also sneered at myself.

I had always been convinced (I don't know by what, in retrospect) that they were decommissioned German military personnel carriers imported into Nigeria to aid public transportation! Can you beat that? Making a mountain out of a mole hill abi na Molue out of an Okada? Such an assumption must be the consequence of matching an often overactive imagination with more than a passing interest in warfare history, spiced up with a few well-meaning but misconstrued world war movie storylines. That was a mouthful, I'm sure. Anyway, I had even gone online at google.com to certify my suspicions. Of course, the effort was fruitless but not so uneventful. At least, I got offers for some 911 truckheads that looked to be in good condition. (*Rolls eyes*)

Well, I was still a tiny bit sceptical when my fruitless search made me contemplate d possibility of what eventually became my 'Revelation of The Truth'. Belated Eureka!

I asked (no, more like mentioned my suspicions to) a Senior Citizen who gleefully confirmed SOME of the following facts:

Molues were (and still are) in fact, Proudly Nigerian innovations, particularly Lagos,
* The power and transmission systems are German developments BUT the chassis, seats, fittings and accessories (I pray o!) are Nigerian,
* The electrical systems (or lack of such) are Nigerian customizations of the original German installments,
* The passenger capacity of the vehicle is an extraneous variable dependent partially on the installed seating capacity, the desperation of the commuters and the bullying or intimidatory abilities of the bus boys (more often ‘bus men’ or Papas, as I recently observed) which quantity is also a function of the individual's hands-on (bus-on) experience, temperament (the more outspoken, the better), 'communication' skills (the raspier or more aggressive-sounding, the better), sometimes alcohol consumption and retention capacity (for morale boost) etc

But I digress now, so back to the subject.

I came across posts by a member of an established online social forum on the history of road transport in Lagos and was particularly blessed (It was afterall an answer to prayers) and enlightened by the section on the Molues. However, for all its good intentions, the articles did not reveal who conceived the notion of customizing the Mercedes Benz 911 heavy-duty, flat bed truck into a mass transit machine. I don’t think even its German manufacturers foresaw this potential.

So, the question still remains…

Who invented the Molue?

Is there anyone out there with the answer?


(c)www.nu-well..com

Re: Who Invented The Molue? A Satire by nuwell(m): 7:42am On Apr 23, 2013
Haba! Still no answers? I recommend this question be introduced into WAEC syllabus, in that case.
#The Ultimate Test Question
wink
Re: Who Invented The Molue? A Satire by Ishilove: 2:10pm On Apr 30, 2013
I was once elbowed in the bosom while rushing one of these dinosaurs. The poor booob throbbed for days! angry
Re: Who Invented The Molue? A Satire by nuwell(m): 2:39pm On Apr 30, 2013
Ishilove: I was once elbowed in the bosom by while rushing one of these dinosaurs. The poor booob throbbed for days! angry

Ouch!
grin grin

Eyaah! Pele sha
Re: Who Invented The Molue? A Satire by Ishilove: 3:21pm On Apr 30, 2013
nu-well:


Ouch!
grin grin

Eyaah! Pele sha
As in ehn... Right in the middle sad

I abandoned the vehicle and went to a corner to cry sad
Re: Who Invented The Molue? A Satire by nuwell(m): 3:27pm On Apr 30, 2013
Ishilove:
As in ehn... Right in the middle sad

I abandoned the vehicle and went to a corner to cry sad

And I can be sure, the culprit was blissfully unaware? He/she must have boarded the vehicle themselves, I'm sure
Re: Who Invented The Molue? A Satire by Ishilove: 3:31pm On Apr 30, 2013
nu-well:


And I can be sure, the culprit was blissfully unaware? He/she must have boarded the vehicle themselves, I'm sure
This is an understatement. The dude was using his elbow, a very muscular elbow by the way, to demolish everything that stood in his path. My booob was unfortunate to be in the line of fire and it paid dearly for it.
Re: Who Invented The Molue? A Satire by nuwell(m): 3:39pm On Apr 30, 2013
The Curse of the Molue...
Wasn't designed to breed gentlemen...or ladies.The same theme is beginning to happen with BRT's as well now. The saving grace is the modicum of dignity that queuing instills. If not,eh! Even now sef, try to board a BRT when people have been standing in line for a hour or two, one has to be careful. Interestingly, I don't witness too many molue-hustling scenes these days. Dem no send them like before
Re: Who Invented The Molue? A Satire by Ishilove: 3:47pm On Apr 30, 2013
nu-well:
The Curse of the Molue...
Wasn't designed to breed gentlemen...or ladies.The same theme is beginning to happen with BRT's as well now. The saving grace is the modicum of dignity that queuing instills. If not,eh! Even now sef, try to board a BRT when people have been standing in line for a hour or two, one has to be careful. Interestingly, I don't witness too many molue-hustling scenes these days. Dem no send them like before
Molues aren't as popular as they used to be
Re: Who Invented The Molue? A Satire by Ishilove: 3:48pm On Apr 30, 2013
You remind me of naptu undecided
Re: Who Invented The Molue? A Satire by nuwell(m): 3:55pm On Apr 30, 2013
Ishilove: You remind me of naptu undecided

undecided
.
.
wink
.
.
smiley
.
.
grin

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