I need some advice.i am dating someone now and he is 28 and our age difference is just 2yrs (im d younger). He loves me and respects me so much that i have never seen anything like it. I love him too. Problem is dat we just finished school and he has not started working and i dont mind it cos we did a professional course that could make us not wait long b4 getting a job. But d thing is dat i get pressurised from people saying that he is wasting my time. And dat he is tying me down.he is very responsible and has high value 4 women.we were even best friends before we started dating.although d relationship is not perfect, but it's d type i want. i have dated in d past, even d so-called settled ones i dated still hurt me in one way or d other. Abeg! Is it a good idea to still hold on to him cos i feel he is worth it!?
Thanks!

I will give u several to choose from:

Like d book readers who follow quotes from writers like zombie: follow ur heart. If u think he is not good for u, leave him. Dnt help him to waste ur time.


Like d hypocrites: at 28yrs, still no job for him. U are getting old. a relationship shldnt be more than 6months before he proposes and u marry. Leave him and do something better with ur life!

Like d foolish ladies: sister, at 26yrs u are still young to entangle urself in a relationship that is bearing no fruit. I am not askin u to leave him, but av others who are ready to meet ur needs. Have fun and if he finds out and can't take it, leave him and enjoy ur life. Life is too short my sister. Cheers.

Like d dejected: my dear, i am 35yrs old, single with a good job and happy. I can't allow one man to turn me into a slave. Give him ultimatum to get a job, if he can't av, dump his ass or he will be collecting from u.

Like d b!tches: listen baby, any man who can't pay ur bills shld be dumped!

Like mynd: tell him ur mind. as in, what is disturbing u now. Tell him u dnt knw if he is worth holding on to.If he is a MAN, he will undstnd, if he is a baby, he won't. And if didn't, move on with ur life!

Okay, now, like me, KINGwax: baby, i dey short of words o. I tot both of u shld undstnd d present situation in Nigeria. It's hard to find a man dt holds a lady in high value. Pls, keep praying, and both of u cld set up a bizinez while it lasts. If u are not d get-rich-quick type of a lady!

Seconded

SLIDE waxie: I will give u several to choose from:

Like d book readers who follow quotes from writers like zombie: follow ur heart. If u think he is not good for u, leave him. Dnt help him to waste ur time.


Like d hypocrites: at 28yrs, still no job for him. U are getting old. a relationship shldnt be more than 6months before he proposes and u marry. Leave him and do something better with ur life!

Like d foolish ladies: sister, at 26yrs u are still young to entangle urself in a relationship that is bearing no fruit. I am not askin u to leave him, but av others who are ready to meet ur needs. Have fun and if he finds out and can't take it, leave him and enjoy ur life. Life is too short my sister. Cheers.

Like d dejected: my dear, i am 35yrs old, single with a good job and happy. I can't allow one man to turn me into a slave. Give him ultimatum to get a job, if he can't av, dump his ass or he will be collecting from u.

Like d b!tches: listen baby, any man who can't pay ur bills shld be dumped!

Like mynd: tell him ur mind. as in, what is disturbing u now. Tell him u dnt knw if he is worth holding on to.If he is a MAN, he will undstnd, if he is a baby, he won't. And if didn't, move on with ur life!

Okay, now, like me, KINGwax: baby, i dey short of words o. I tot both of u shld undstnd d present situation in Nigeria. It's hard to find a man dt holds a lady in high value. Pls, keep praying, and both of u cld set up a bizinez while it lasts. If u are not d get-rich-quick type of a lady!

Oya nice write up

SLIDE waxie: I will give u several to choose from:

Like d book readers who follow quotes from writers like zombie: follow ur heart. If u think he is not good for u, leave him. Dnt help him to waste ur time.


Like d hypocrites: at 28yrs, still no job for him. U are getting old. a relationship shldnt be more than 6months before he proposes and u marry. Leave him and do something better with ur life!

Like d foolish ladies: sister, at 26yrs u are still young to entangle urself in a relationship that is bearing no fruit. I am not askin u to leave him, but av others who are ready to meet ur needs. Have fun and if he finds out and can't take it, leave him and enjoy ur life. Life is too short my sister. Cheers.

Like d dejected: my dear, i am 35yrs old, single with a good job and happy. I can't allow one man to turn me into a slave. Give him ultimatum to get a job, if he can't av, dump his ass or he will be collecting from u.

Like d b!tches: listen baby, any man who can't pay ur bills shld be dumped!

Like mynd: tell him ur mind. as in, what is disturbing u now. Tell him u dnt knw if he is worth holding on to.If he is a MAN, he will undstnd, if he is a baby, he won't. And if didn't, move on with ur life!

Okay, now, like me, KINGwax: baby, i dey short of words o. I tot both of u shld undstnd d present situation in Nigeria. It's hard to find a man dt holds a lady in high value. Pls, keep praying, and both of u cld set up a bizinez while it lasts. If u are not d get-rich-quick type of a lady!

Precisely. But you still need to classify things. 28 yrs old is no bones. So sit down and have a long chat as to where this whole thing is going over 2-5 years, marriage prospects, career, family (kids etc) and start basing your decisions on his responses. Who knows, 10 years later he might still be struggling. What then?

However, his attitude and character are key. if he is determined and strong mentally then he has a chance of making it. He treats you well and respects you so that guarantees your struggle wont be in vain if he can sort himself out financially. Your target should be to get married within 2 years.

PS: Are you working too and chasing a career?

You have already testified that he is good and he is all you want. Why do you want to walk up and down when you are happy.Listen to yourself.

andromida: You have already testified that he is good and he is all you want. Why do you want to walk up and down when you are happy.Listen to yourself.

But she still needs to look at the relationship. At her age, marriage is a likely next target for her and she needs to know that he is onboard. What if he wants a few more years to develop his career and she wants to settle now? These are questions she needs to ask at 28.

facing d fact,getting a guy like dat in naija nw is like looking for an iroko tree in d desert,for christ sake what else do u want,he makes u happy n dats what matas,u just said it,u guys just graduated,give him sometime,and fortunately u did proffesional courses u can start with dat,with wat u wrote,i give ur guy 2ys to be a lil bit ready,abeg o girl stick to ur man,ur happiness matters d most,but most importantly talk to him and know his plans for u and d time frame,and also try to get sometin doin,good luck

haitto99: facing d fact,getting a guy like dat in naija nw is like looking for an iroko tree in d desert,for christ sake what else do u want,he makes u happy n dats what matas,u just said it,u guys just graduated,give him sometime,and fortunately u did proffesional courses u can start with dat,with wat u wrote,i give ur guy 2ys to be a lil bit ready,abeg o girl stick to ur man,ur happiness matters d most,but most importantly talk to him and know his plans for u and d time frame,and also try to get sometin doin,good luck

Same here. I said the 2 years thing too

JUST AS THE CONTRIBUTORS ABOVE SAID, SIT DOWN WITH HIM AND YOU GUYS SHOULD PLAN WHAT THE FUTURE BOTH OF YOU WANT FOR YOURSELVES, FROM THE LONG CHAT, YOU WILL KNOW IF YOU ARE PART OF HIS PLAN AND WHAT HE INTEND TO DO IN THE NEAREST FUTURE. I WON'T ADVICE STARTING ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP NOW. MAY GOD HELP YOU GUYS IN YOUR JOURNEY AND PROVIDE THE NEEDED JOB.

Atheist:-D:


But she still needs to look at the relationship. At her age, marriage is a likely next target for her and she needs to know that he is onboard. What if he wants a few more years to develop his career and she wants to settle now? These are questions she needs to ask at 28.

You are on point she should talk to him about her fears.she will want to marry in a few years time and if he is a nice man and loves her he will want to marry her- nice men are by nature willing to commit i don't think professional exams is all they have been discussing all these while.She has something good, she should hold on to it

andromida:

You are on point she should talk to him about her fears.she will want to marry in a few years time and if he is a nice man and loves her he will want to marry her- nice men are by nature willing to commit i don't think professional exams is all they have been discussing all these while.She has something good, she should hold on to it

Precisely, but they must talk. Not in 2 years time she is on nairaland crying about how she wasted her life with a guy and he didnt eant to fully commit/settle.

you said he is a graduate, respects and loves you. Just finished school and looking for a job. The only reason they seem to pressurise you ( according to my understanding) is that they feel him being jobless currently is tying you down. Babe i have learnt that no one knows tomorrow. He sounds like a cool guy and would advice you to hold on as he is not just relaxing. He is still looking for employment. What if you dump him today then the next thing he gets employeed? you would have thrown all this goodness away for what? what i love about nigerians is that we also are business minded people, maybe he can start his own bzns. I have seen people go from nothing to big ( all in good time). It is hard to find someone who understands you and who you also understand in life. Do not throw it all away just because of a temporary disorder. Remember that behind every succeful man, there is a very strong intelligent woman who knows goodness when she sees one. Hold on child. Its gonna be alright

Monicasque: you said he is a graduate, respects and loves you. Just finished school and looking for a job. The only reason they seem to pressurise you ( according to my understanding) is that they feel him being jobless currently is tying you down. Babe i have learnt that no one knows tomorrow. He sounds like a cool guy and would advice you to hold on as he is not just relaxing. He is still looking for employment. What if you dump him today then the next thing he gets employeed? you would have thrown all this goodness away for what? what i love about nigerians is that we also are business minded people, maybe he can start his own bzns. I have seen people go from nothing to big ( all in good time). It is hard to find someone who understands you and who you also understand in life. Do not throw it all away just because of a temporary disorder. Remember that behind every succeful man, there is a very strong intelligent woman who knows goodness when she sees one. Hold on child. Its gonna be alright

Sounds good. She has lots of good advice to go on. She cant go wrong. Who said nairaland isnt good for romance advice?

SLIDEwaxie:
I will give u several to choose from:

Like d book readers who follow quotes from writers like zombie: follow ur heart. If u think he is not good for u, leave him. Dnt help him to waste ur time.


Like d hypocrites: at 28yrs, still no job for him. U are getting old. a relationship shldnt be more than 6months before he proposes and u marry. Leave him and do something better with ur life!

Like d foolish ladies: sister, at 26yrs u are still young to entangle urself in a relationship that is bearing no fruit. I am not askin u to leave him, but av others who are ready to meet ur needs. Have fun and if he finds out and can't take it, leave him and enjoy ur life. Life is too short my sister. Cheers.

Like d dejected: my dear, i am 35yrs old, single with a good job and happy. I can't allow one man to turn me into a slave. Give him ultimatum to get a job, if he can't av, dump his ass or he will be collecting from u.

Like d b!tches: listen baby, any man who can't pay ur bills shld be dumped!

Like mynd: tell him ur mind. as in, what is disturbing u now. Tell him u dnt knw if he is worth holding on to.If he is a MAN, he will undstnd, if he is a baby, he won't. And if didn't, move on with ur life!

Okay, now, like me, KINGwax: baby, i dey short of words o. I tot both of u shld undstnd d present situation in Nigeria. It's hard to find a man dt holds a lady in high value. Pls, keep praying, and both of u cld set up a bizinez while it lasts. If u are not d get-rich-quick type of a lady!

hehehehe,you have made my day...
Best reply ever.

Youngpo413:





hehehehe,you have made my day...
Best reply ever.

u shouldn't have brought up an old topic

MrIknowAll:
u shouldn't have brought up an old topic

it`s new to me...

Youngpo413:



it`s new to me...

And you had to awaken it? Some people sha

Emmysteve:
And you had to awaken it? Some people sha

yes,anything wrong with it?

The first person to comment has said it all.

You need some time alone to think. Think about it thoroughly. You need not to only think about today, but where the future holds you.

This man is as good as it gets. They say good things do not come easy. The fact that he is a graduate and still looking for a job does not determine his tomorrow. The richest men started from nowhere. Be a strong woman, stick with your man. Yeah I can say that time is not really on your side at the moment, but this man is definitely your husband.

Plan with him. Be his mentor. Be the foundation of his success. Work together and grow as one. I'm telling you, you will have the last laugh. Don't allow your family members even your mother to discourage. There comes a point in time, where you have to make decisions on your own. You have to be a woman and make strong independent actions.