Would Salami believe that lie? I dont think so.

gameboy727: Would Salami believe that lie? I dont think so.

really
dont forget they were at logger head
before he got fired.

where are the other followers of this blog na?

now im goin into my cave till you guys pop out...
no post till you guys post...

Boy i just started reading ur story from d begining and what i have 2 say is that "THIS STORY MAKE SENSE".

Salami will swallow that easily.

following lik mad

Daniel2802: Boy i just started reading ur story from d begining and what i have 2 say is that "THIS STORY MAKE SENSE".

thats nice,
i think you should hurry up and catch the train.

thanks bro.

Damex333: Salami will swallow that easily.

nice prediction
lets see who predits perfect.

workin on next post.
expect it...
lets say tomorrow.

scon-p:
following lik mad

thats great.

thanks.

EPISODE 31

I HAD JUST LIED but it did not matter, my emotions had taken over me.
Surprisingly, my right hand man dropped his gun. I guess pastor Salami had told him to do it.
I heard pastor Salami steps approaching me from behind. As each step advanced, my heart pounded simultaneously. Has he decided to blow off my head himself? I could assume that because my right hand man had dropped his gun. Grasshopper said he was a murderer. I could not believe this man was the pastor I knew; his life is just antithetical. Yet before now, I saw him as an angel fall from heaven.

As pastor Salami approached, I dropped my head; it was a style to watch him from the base. I tried to pick his shadow. He came closer inches apart.
I could already imagine his hand curling on the trigger behind me ready to fire. I closed my eyes. I began to welcome the spirit world to receive my soul.

Next, I heard steps amble slowly beside me to my front. I did not open my eyes nor raise my face. I felt he wanted to blow me off from my forehead, or on this battered heart. I was ready; I prayed my last prayer, it was simple and true. I said-

‘Lord Jesus, please take me on your wings to the spirit world where I might avenge all these doers of evil’

The urge to gain vengeance had consumed me far beyond the urge to seek eternal forgiveness. However, I did not blame myself for such action or thought.

I waited. Quiet seconds were ticking away. Nothing happened. However that was no guarantee that the trigger would not be pulled the next minute; based on that I still bowed in expectation.

My legs were betraying me; they began to shake as I battled with my thought.
Just then, a calm voice erupted beneath my nose-

“David-“
I raised my head, pastor Salami was standing in front of me. He had dropped his gun, although he still had it in his hand; at least he was not pointing it at me. That did not seem to cure my reflex fear; the sight of the gun still made my legs shake the more.

‘What does he want to say, or does he believe the lie I told him?’ I was trying to brainstorm
I raised my head and looked at him, this time firm, concealing every iota of fear.

“Get up” Pastor salami said.
I wondered what he was up to I looked at him, as if asking him with my eyes if he meant what he said.

‘Get up’ he repeated gently again.

I could not understand this man. His mood was like the fluctuating weather; unpredictable most times.
I struggled with my vibrating legs, I never wanted him to see it, but it seemed like that was the only place he was looking. I felt timid.

I stood before him looking at his face but not his eyes.
He pointed to the chair and told me to seat.
I was surprised at his sudden drama.

As I sat down, he joined me on the three-setter. My right hand man also relaxed on the three-setter opposite us. I was thinking he was supposed to clean the mess grasshoppers death had caused, but he sat so convenient, surprisingly he did not even go to mourn grasshopper. He did not even touch him nor whisper his last words to him. Strangely the last thing I saw on his face was remorse.

I knew he had killed Grasshopper to save Pastor Salami, but did he do it in his best state of mind? Did he really love to save the pastors life or was it more than that?
I could not understand how someone would be so unconcerned about the death of his co-worker. Is this part of the meaning of the word ‘cannibal’, or does it means emotionless? Even if a person were your enemy, that vacuum should be there anyway.

It was later on I understood that he was just acting based on the laws of the volturis Empire but what I never knew was if he ever felt anything like remorse for humans.

Backing the first rule of the Empire was an under note that made some specifications.
When I saw it, I knew that heartlessness was a law around here.
The rule read-

‘If a person is guilty of murder and he is murdered by capon or the president, no sign of remorse or any question would be welcomed. Else such a person would be guilty of a higher sin, and shall be treated as a co-conspirator against the volturis Empire’


I was waiting for what Pastor Salami would say, but he seemed to take it slow.

‘Grasshopper was my man, a man who I loved’ P. Salami began.
I looked at him, was it story time again? He had previously said that my presence had a therapeutic effect on him. Was that true?
Well, I just kept silent to examine closely the turn of events.

‘When your dog begins to bark at you, yet you are still feeding it. When it begins to threaten you and welcome the strange people, then, such a dog should be sold to the Calabar people, that’s if the individual is not a Calabar person’

It was just then I wondered what tribe pastor Salami was.
‘is the dog owner a Calabar person?’
‘That’s why I never sold my dog’ he replied.

‘You killed the dog because it was forming alliance with outsiders and barking at you?’
I asked
He gave a vain smile.
I knew the alliances he was talking about was not to be pluralized he was referring to me in particular.

‘So what would you do to the alliances?’

‘I would question them or charge them with conspiracy to kill me.’

I could not say anything, I had direction it back to myself I knew what was coming next.

‘And that is why I’m asking you for the last time to tell me the truth. I know you are not the dog you are a visitor. What did Grasshopper say?’

I watched him very blank of ideas. He began to romance his gun. Something told me that even if I said the truth he would still kill me anyway.
However, in knew that so long there is life there is still hope. I must try my best, even if it costs the last drop of blood to stay alive. I must be alive to await my dues ex machina if he or she lies somewhere in my future.

I thought of what to tell pastor Salami. Of course, I could not tell him the truth, I could not tell him he gave me an inkling to hope and truth that would be disastrous. However, I must say something. I knew playing games with pastor Salami could cot me my life short. I began to see my self sinking deep into the quagmire of self made confusion.

What would I say?
Then I remembered my days in boarding school and how good we were at telling lies.
I had a friend then called Mahmud …

********************************************

BOARDING SCHOOL-about a year from now.
SS3-




It was the first Saturday of the month, and as usual, it was our normal visiting day.
Mahmud was our house captain, we were mates and we were very intimate.

Previously my dad had called me and told me that he would not be able to make it down to our visiting day. He had complained of tight schedules and office spillovers.
Mom that would have been an option had also traveled for a wedding. It was not easy on me; I was financially down. It was so terrible I could bet that the desert was more fruitful than my locker, as at then…

But sometimes friends fall in the same quagmire.

‘David, mehn this visiting day is so screwed for me, pop c see said he aint going to show and you know I’m damn broke’ Mahmud had complained to me.

‘Oh boy na the same shoe we wear o’ I replied

We were in ss3 and we knew that the last thing to do was to break lockers to steal provisions; it was on that note we devised a plan.

The next morning parents came and parents went. People ate people drunk.
Some frolicked, some cheered; the whole school was a big cafeteria.
Boys ate whole chickens; some drank a whole crate of minerals. In fact, I saw a boy splitting an EVEREST of pounded yam, he had missed home food so much that he dipped his two hands into the mountain, and like an individual fanning himself with his two hands, he hungrily savaged the whole food. It did not take him five minute!
Mahmud and I just sat and watched the turn of events. We grinned at each other at the thought of our plan.

As the evening approached, parents began to leave their wards for their houses. It was then we began our operation.
We sat in front of our hostel gate, blocking the entrance completely. As each junior student came, we tasked him for money.
We used rhetoric’s, fallacies, force everything possible just to convince them to give us what we want. Those that were stubborn we punished right on the spot and threatened to make their life miserable for the remaining days we had to spend in the school. These set of people usually concurred after a short punishment.

That evening we gathered a total sum of twelve thousand. We were just to ourselves and shared it 50-50.
We also went eating from person to person; those who had brought food to the hostel.
We also gathered bottles of drinks that sustained us for a week

The next morning I was in class as usual when our labor master called me out. He had already called out Mahmud. That gave me inkling that junior student had reported. He took us to his office and ordered us to explain what we did.

‘I learnt you punished innocent students and extorted so much money from them, was that true?
’
I did not know what to say. The fear of God that I got from our archaic church although we had left by then was still in my heart. I did not know what to say and the truth was not an option; but thank God, I had a friend called Mahmud.

As Mahmud was about to say something the labor master phone beeped.
He excused us,
Then Mahmud told me the greatest tip on lying. He said;

‘The best way to lie is to go very close to the truth. The farther you go from the truth the wider the lacuna. When you totally deny, one finger would point back at you, one finger you never noticed’

By the time the labor master came back in, I had become a professional liar…

We simply told him we collected the money with the aim of buying some needs in the hostel. We said the boys would not contribute so we used force. When the labor master doubted, we said we had already sent for the wall clock. When he asked whom we sent, I lied and told him my father. I gave him my father’s number to call him right away, but he seemed to believe me.
He then wanted to punish us for punishing the student. However, we lied that our housemaster had ordered us to do so. We knew he had a big quarrel with our housemaster and there was no way he could ask him. He then said we would have to apologies to them, but we rejected it and said we were ordered to do it. in anger he sent us out of his office and told us to come back. However, we never did, we knew there was no use.


*********************************************

As that big thought came to my mind, I knew three words were important in my lie to keep so close to the truth.
One ‘father’, two ‘Amanda’ three a word starting with‘s’
But I knew I couldn’t use Amanda so I thought of a rhyming word, I concluded with ‘sister’

Then I replied.
‘Truly I’m sorry I spoke out of annoyance the other time…’

‘I would forgive you if you now tell me the truth’ Salami interjected.

I robbed my hands together to feign fear and humility then I spoke.
‘He said, you took away his father, sister and soul..’

He looked at me closely I knew he was falling for it.

‘I knew I heard father and something like sister, but I know that’s not all’

‘Maybe if you heard anything else, you can tell me, probably I was too emotional to listen’

He looked at me for a short while. I looked into eyes s0o he would not think I’m lying.
Then finally, he said.

‘I believe you, thanks for saving my life….may God save yours to, if he wishes’

I looked at him, I did not know if it was prayer or curse.
I did not know if I should say Amen.

Type on.

dear followers-

check out my latest poems on my blog

jayloyexten.


-ie
CHURCH BOY
ABORTION?

TO DAMEX, DANIEL, PROFINGO, SLICKEST, SCON- P, GAMEBOY, ENOMASLY, *And others which name i may not mention, to the quiet followers of this post, guests just everybody.
i'm saying a BIG THANK YOU
for following all this months, weeks and days.
God bless you!

"what Lurks In The Dark"
takes a new look
as tragedy, adventure, climax and fun begins.
here is the dark part and crux!!
i would have named it part two...in fact it is
expect it by tomorrow.

would David be smart enough to get out, would he be just lucky or would it be a thing of providence?

lets roll!
love you all.
dont forget to check my blog
jayloyexten.

jayloyexten: TO DAMEX, DANIEL, PROFINGO, SLICKEST, SCON- P, GAMEBOY, ENOMASLY, *And others which name i may not mention, to the quiet followers of this post, guests just everybody.
i'm saying a BIG THANK YOU
for following all this months, weeks and days.
God bless you!

"what Lurks In The Dark"
takes a new look
as tragedy, adventure, climax and fun begins.
here is the dark part and crux!!
i would have named it part two...in fact it is
expect it by tomorrow.

would David be smart enough to get out, would he be just lucky or would it be a thing of providence?

lets roll!
love you all.
dont forget to check my blog
jayloyexten.

owk,i rili appreciate ur work waiting 4 ur 2moro's update.

EPISODE 33


‘I saved your life, are you going to save mine to?’
I broke the silence that sustained between pastor Salami and I.

He looked at me with a questioning look; a volcano of laughter lurked beneath his face.
‘Oh you are so funny boy, tomorrow is Friday and you are going to be our savior’

‘But I saved your life, would you still let me die?’

‘You are special and your death would be a special one. Your death would bring liberty to the Volturis Empire.

‘If the Volturis Empire needs a savior, then sacrifice one of the volturis. Or if it seems evil to you to sacrifice the volturis, here is grasshopper, go ahead and sacrifice him. He is dead already’

‘Grasshopper?’

‘Of course, he makes a perfect sacrifice, doesn’t he? He is already dead, he is a sacrifice already, why sacrifice me, what do you see in me? I am just a boy, a little boy. Remember you said that i make nothing but bankrupt in the market of cannibals, so why are you concerned about my flesh? Grasshopper would make a perfect sacrifice. Let me go home, let me see my parents again, I need to see my little sister. I am tired of this night of misery. Let it end now. I swear I would tell nobody. I will keep everything I saw, heard and imagined secret, please cant you see that there is no need of me dying?’ I said almost breaking into tears

‘You don’t understand’ the pastor replied.

‘Pastor is that all you have to say?’ I said sorrowfully

‘The thing is that grasshopper cannot make the sacrifice for you’

‘Why, but he is dead’

He grins ‘you don’t understand, down in the ground are numerous dead humans, if we were looking for one, we would go there and pick ten’

‘So what is stopping you, go ahead and pick one, can’t you see that my death is unnecessary?’

‘If your death was unnecessary then why did I abduct you?’

‘You see that is what I am talking of, there was no use’

He scoffs gently.

‘Are you scorning me in my misery? For the fact I saved your life, would you not consider saving mine to? Sir you are a father, you have a daughter, how would you feel if she is been sacrificed to an unknown god?’

‘My daughter is not in this country, and no one dares touch her. Look, I do not have anything against you, your parents recommended that you should come down here’

‘And be sacrificed?’
I asked as if I had never had that before. Although I had heard my dad was involved and I had seen his number on pastor Salamis phone, I had also discovered my dad gave me pastors Salamis number in the feign for my aunt, but every thing was still a night mare which I couldn’t come in terms with

‘Your parents gave you up, because you reminded them of a terrible event that they wouldn’t like to remember’ He continued

The foundations of my heart shook
‘What do you mean?’ I asked; my eyes glowing with sheer amazement

‘Who do you look like, dad or mum….’

Immediately the question brought a flash back to my mind…



**********************************************

FIVE YEARS AGO (I was twelve years then)

It was a Saturday morning and I was listening to a television program.
It was a family affair thing. There the journalist was discussing some family issues, basically on how children no longer resemble their parents..
He said
‘Children now look so much like their mothers even if they are males’

Many people called expressing their views about the common event of no or single resemblance.

Some said that if a child does not resemble his father, then that child is not the child of the man.
But the point was seriously opposed on the basis of gene drift, concentration of a gene, and a recessive gene which may just show up suddenly.

Some other men said that the women of now and days were very deceptive and unfaithful.
One man commented saying,.
‘Most of our wives go play the away game with some mechanics and crude individuals, bare bastards and in our ignorance; they push them on us’

He was so emotional about it that he shared his life experience of how he had married his first wife and had four children.
But one fateful morning he woke up only to discover that none of his children actually resembles him.
In curiosity and quest for the truth, he went for check up in the hospital. He couldn’t bare his wife,s infidelity, when the doctor told him he had a low sperm count. His wife later opened up after severe battles and threat to quit.

Many men seconded the man. Some even shared more terrible experiences than the man did.

Then the journalist began to rap things up he said;
‘The matter is simple, the topic well discussed. If you are a child and you do not look like your parent, you better go ask them before it becomes too late, this goes to our husbands and wives, well this is not a yardstick for infidelity…’


‘David breakfast is ready’ mum billowed from the kitchen.
Next dad called me, he had ran out of patience, probably the hunger had so eaten him deep.
Against my wish I left the program and ran to the dinning table.

The table was set already, dad Vera and mom were already seated.
It was bread egg and tea. I led the meal prayers that morning.

‘Father bless and sanctify this food, every impurity we pray you remove. In Jesus name I have prayed. Amen’
That was the normal food prayer; I had prayed it from time immemorial.

As the meal went on, the question I got from the program began to ring in my mind, I couldn’t keep it any longer
Then I asked

‘Dad and mom, Vera looks so much like mommy, in fact people get confused and say it is daddy, how about me, who do I look like?’

Everybody burst into laughter, but I knew I wasn’t joking
‘I am serious why is everybody laughing’ I questioned with a bit of anger.

Then mom gave dad a funny look, they seemed to communicate something to each other, I wasn’t interested, all I cared was an explanation before accepting what the media had just fed me with,

Mom laughed louder this time, then she spoke in between laughter.
‘Oh my son, why are you asking such questions, cant you see, you look like Jesus?’

‘But I have never seen Jesus before how then can I know what he looks like? After all he was a white and I am not, mommy who do I look like’

‘Oh the bible says we were created after the likeness of God, we were created in Gods own image and after his likeness’

‘Then why don’t we all have one face?’

‘Oh we are made to vary, that’s the beauty of creation’

‘I don’t understand what you are saying’ I interjected

‘The bible says…’

‘I do not care what the bible says!’ I blared with impatience

There was a sudden silence.
Then I turned to dad,
‘Dad who do I look like?’

‘You look like me, perfectly!’ he said without wasting a second.

‘Oh no, I do not look like you, you have a big nose and I don’t, your lips are as big as a big basket but mine is as small as a small basket hole’

Everybody burst into mad laughter. I did not know when I joined the wagon, I was serious and never wanted to.

In no time I killed the laughter, and went back to my serious mood. Before I could say anything dad had interrupted, I guess he perceived I was not satisfied by the vain answers

‘Actually,’ he began ‘you are just a very special child I do not know what scientist call it whether its gene drift or some show up of some recessive gene in a new generation, your case is something like that. I had also asked that question before, but I did not have to think too far. By the time I observed your small head, small nose, small mouth and small everything, I knew you were the exact replica of my father who died when I was very young’

‘So you mean I look like a dead man?’

‘Are you calling my dad a dead man?’

‘I’m sorry sir, but-‘

‘But what? Do you know how much I loved my dad before he died?’

‘I’m sorry sir’ I began to feel bad.

‘No it’s no problem, so are you satisfied?’

‘Sure I am; I was only been inquisitive’

‘It’s normal especially at your age, when puberty covers you like the stars cover the sky’


We all giggled and consumed our meal happily as usual. I had no reason to doubt my parents; they had showered me with love. I believed I was their child, and there was never a doubt in my mind’


*********************************************


‘David,’ pastor Salami shook me.

‘oh I’m sorry I was kind of lost on thoughts’

‘You should’

‘I know’

‘Who do you look like?’ he asked again.

‘I look like Jesus and my grandfather’

‘Of course they could feed you with that’

‘Who are they?’

‘I do not know’

‘Sir please speak in clear terms’

‘Look I have a home to go to; I was to have some nice time with my wife’

‘Sir tell me plainly, are you trying to say that my parents are not my parent in real sense?’

‘What do you mean by real sense?’

‘Alright, are they truly my parent?’

‘Go and ask them yourself’

‘Show me the way out, so I could ask them’

‘So you think you are smart? When you become spirit you can ask them in spirit’

‘Please sir just tell me’

‘That what ?’

‘Please sir’

‘Fine! I do not know, and don’t ever ask me again, when you are dead go in spirit and ask them’

‘sir-‘

He reached for his bag, the bag grasshopper had brought.
‘Oh my penis for libido excellence its been quite a while’

I did not dare look at his direction; I could not bare the sight, besides, my heart was heavy.

Then he came back to his seat, the bag beside him.
‘David, you were never meant to come to this world’

‘Thank you sir!’ I said with a stoic look.

‘I know you think I am evil, but cannibalism was created by God and your death is scriptural. I am a pastor and everything I do is according to the bible’

‘Sir I do not believe that, you tried to rape me, and that was not scriptural’

‘The bible says in the second book of psalms, ‘kiss the son lest he be angry’ I only wanted to kiss you, nothing more’

‘Never! I don’t know what you were attempting, but I know something for sure, you are gay and God is against that’ I looked directly into his eyes and let the word sink

‘Where in the bible did God say ‘thou shall not be gay?’
Besides what did you think of Jesus? Didn’t the bible say John was always lying on the breast of Jesus? If you call me gay, then Jesus was. I am only following the footsteps of Jesus.’

I looked at him with disgust “you are blaspheming and God would never forgive you’

‘That’s all you can say, you cannot prove me wrong, I did not write the Bible’
I
I knew he was right, I do not have the facts to counter him. Although I knew Jesus was pure and in Him was no sin at all, I was only a baby in scriptures I couldn’t find the right passages to disprove him. But I used one thing, and that was my sense of morality.

‘You are a cannibal, and cannibalism is totally against God. The bible says ‘thou shall not kill’, cannibalism is murder!’

‘I accept that I am a cannibal, but I am no murderer’

‘It makes no difference’ I interjected

‘Well it does and listen to me very well; You do not read your bible so you can say anything you like. For your information, God accepts cannibalism; he created it. Come to think of it, where is it written in the bible that cannibalism is a sin?’

‘I do not know, what are you driving at’

‘Fine. Genesis chapter 9 verse 3 reads,
‘Everything that lives and move about will be food for you just as I gave you the green plants, I now give you everything’

‘Tell me don’t humans move about? God has given us everything; it is left for us to choose what we want to eat! And I, pastor Salami Jacobs I have chosen to eat human flesh and drink human blood, it is my choice, God has given us freedom of diet!’


I was lost and confused. I didn’t know what to say. What he said was like soured beans in my stomach. I looked at him, his charisma, voice, boldness and logic was all convincing.
I dropped my head and prayed to God, I didn’t say much, I just said
‘God please help me’

Immediately I remembered one of the memory verses I crammed while we were in our archaic church. Then every Sunday every body would cram a verse of the bible related to the study, it is usually called memory verse.

It came to me.
‘Never sir, you are interpreting the bible wrongly Genesis chapter 9 verse 6 says
‘Whoever sheds human blood by humans shall their blood be shed, for in the image of God had God made man kind.’
God is against cannibalism, and that is where He made his point clear’

‘Wow I never knew that. I was expecting you say that, but that is just a verse of the bible, and you cannot pick a bible verse and stand upon it without reading other bible verses’

‘But the verse is clear’

‘It is clear but your mind is not clear, and until you mind is clear you would be incapable of perceiving things clearly’

‘my mind is clear’

‘no it isn’t. but lets leave that for now. Follow me to Deuteronomy chapter 28 verse 53
It reads (he said reading from his tablet)

‘and thou shall eat the fruit of thine own body, the flesh of thy sons and of thy daughters, which the lord thy God had given thee…’
‘That is the bible and I did not write that’

I was short of words; I did not know what to believe again.

‘You see your former church had fed you with so much false doctrines, that was why I had to tell your father to leave’

"So you were the one that..."

EPISODE 34

comes tomorrow.
ceteri paribus.

Thanks.

jayloyexten: EPISODE 34

comes tomorrow.
ceteri paribus.

Thanks.

We should be saying the thanks cos you've really tried. Thanks bro.

EPISODE 34

It was a big step to hope, but a bigger step to knowing the truth.

Previously, the pastor’s words had created a vivid picture of my parents been the most inhuman creatures living on this planet earth, well that was after the volturis empire.
However, all of a sudden I saw a huge wave of light standing at the end of my tunnel.
The pastor had just confessed unconsciously that he had convinced my parents to leave our archaic church. It was such a revelation!

All dad was doing that night, the feigned anger, the vulgar words, the sudden decision to go to the SPIRIT AND THE BLOOD REDEMOTION MINISTRY everything, was all a plan to execute a bigger plan.

My dad was so blind; he could not see the hidden meaning in the name of the church.
He did not understand that the name of the church was just a big irony staring him at the face.
He could not see the damnation that lurked in the drinking of ‘Christ’s blood’.

The fat bread of death was his satisfaction, satisfaction on the surface, grief at the base.
He wasn’t aware of the kind of redemption the ministry offered, if only he had known that the ministry would redeem his life from life and hand him over to death, if only he knew, probably he would have thought twice. He never saw the initiation coming, or probably he did, but why would he choose it?
The pastor had called it ‘ignoramus volturis’, THE IGNORANT VAMPIRES..

There was no way this sect of people would be accepted by God they had taken an oath to be with the devil, they had drank the blood of the dead, they had been joined unknowingly with the devil. On their fore heads is the invisible mark 666. They are damned. They would not receive pardon; they cannot, unless they flee from the church.
It was quite amazing how so many people could be in such bondage and yet be unaware of it

Nevertheless, I learned something from what the pastor had said.

If of a truth he had persuaded my dad to leave his church, come, and join him in his ministry of doom, then one thing became sure, my dad was once pure and innocent.
However, the big question thrived ‘where on earth did my father meet such a man?’
I wished that day was never created.

I could not fathom the deepest truths of my dad or pastor Salami but I knew that in a matter of hours I would know. I do not know how, but I just knew.

I shifted from the pastor to the end of the three-setter, leaving him on the other end. As I watched him, an overflow of spontaneous thoughts spinned in my head like the spinning of a car wheel, at off speed limits.
I tried to bring my mind to equilibrium, and see if I could speak some sense into his head. Or more crucial, some pity. I needed his mercy like I needed oxygen, after all that was why I saved his life in my unconscious foolishness.

‘What kept you from sacrificing your daughter? After all the bible says you shall eat the flesh of your sons and daughters’ I asked with a mockery undertone.

‘Oh I have eaten two of my children already. One was so fat and plump like an elephant; I had named him Nathaniel. He was so handsome, his neck folded like clean ridges. His skin glowed like a roasted meat. His cheeks were so puffy like a pregnant woman. More amazingly, his buttocks were endowed like a female.’
He gave a vain smile and continued.

‘I could not resist him. I ate him when he was thirteen. His flesh was so sweet, I spiced it and ate it at different times with my wife.
His younger sister to was almost like him. Her breast was like a cluster of plump grapes. One day when my wife went to work, I laid her on the bed, penetrated her. Her skin was velvet, I did not know when I got excited and was pouncing on her like ping pong. She fainted in the process; maybe I was too hard on her.’

‘I couldn’t let her die and waste in the grave. She was meat. I also could not let my name go down the drain, not to talk of the stigma she would carry all her life. On that note I killed her myself and ate her.’

‘One day my wife called me aside and said that if we continue this way we wouldn’t have any offspring left, so we sent her abroad. She is about fourteen now. She was the last child. Funny enough, all those years they never knew we were cannibals. This empire was where I ate my two children. So what are you? A bastard, a hopeless boy, what is so special about you? Why should I have a conscience to devour you? As far as I am concerned, you are a dead sheep on the altar of sacrifice!’

I did not know what to say. I had thought my point would strike him so hard; so hard that he would become remorseful and consider the need of my existence.
But what could I expect from this demon? He could not exercise control over his children, he raped his daughter, ate her and her younger brother to.
He did not feel shame or remorse; he was so bold to tell me.

Now it became clear that there was no hope for me, not even an iota. I felt my world crumbling before my face.

Suddenly I fell into a big trance. I could not explain it.
The weather was cold; it was far deep into the night. The land was vast; it was a thick forest. All around me were naked humans, just males and very few females. All of them were cannibals. They were chanting loud songs their language was exotic, it sounded like so many languages, but none in particular. Then I saw my self bundled like an Egyptian mommy, with face left open. I was placed on a wooden altar, there were sticks beneath me.
A man came and stripped me naked. My boxer was the only thing left on me; I was a lamb on the altar.
At first, I was not conscious of what was above me, but by the time I heard the voices of thousands of owls and bats chanting songs of misery above me, I knew I was beneath a very big old tree. That was the first time I saw bats and owls together. It was a horrible sight. My heart pounded, I felt it expand.

A macho man came and threw fire beneath the altar, I could feel the fire from the base of the altar tearing my boxer apart and roasting my buttocks. He held a calabash beside the altar and said some incarnations. His face was painted, he had lots of beads on his body.

Suddenly I saw pastor Salami not too far from me in full nudity shouting,
‘Libido strength! libido strength! Give me the succulent part, sweeten my heart!’

I woke up from the vision.
I was beginning to sweat, my heart pounded so fast. Tears were forming in my eyes, I could feel doom sucking me like the maggots.
For the first time in my scene that horrible night, I could see nothing but hopelessness, haplessness, doom, evil, death!
My heart failed me.

The sacrifice was made for Friday. Then I shall be placed in nudity upon the altar.
It was just hours from me, I tried to envision the scene, but it was to scary to behold.
The more hours I spent in this empire the more doom is unraveled before my eyes.

I bowed my head in dismay.


‘All I did was right in the sight of the lord.’ The pastor began
‘The lord is my shepherd I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside the still waters… you see, because I have been doing the will of God, nobody could touch me, no spirit, no demon. Not even your spirit by this time tomorrow’

Why is he scared? Why did he quote the psalm for protection if deep down he did not see the wrath of God coming?

‘Why is my sacrifice necessary? Is it not to appease the ballistic spirit from taunting you and tormenting you?’ I replied.

‘Yes that is for the younger minds and for this empire as a whole’

I did not say anything.

He continued.
‘Don’t be scared of death, when you die, your spirit would stay in purgatory. We the voloturis would pray on your behalf to God, He always hear us, he will save you. Do not worry purgatory is a fine place. Then from purgatory, you would get to heaven. You shouldn’t fret, you would get to heaven before us all. You see you have a bright future.’ He grinned.
I boiled.

‘I really don’t know why you are beginning to fret didn’t the bible says do not fear them that can kill the body but fear him who can both kill the body and throw the spirit in hell? We can only kill your body, there’s no need to panic.’
Pause
‘ Purgatory is sure with heaven at last!’ he concluded

I wanted to speak but no words came out.
My body and spirit was burning with fire. I felt like tearing him apart. How could he so boldly talk about heaven? Who gave him the guts?

When he saw I was not saying anything, he continued.
‘Don’t worry, the festival would be interesting. You would choose the way you want to die. I guess that would be fair’

I looked at him.
Why was he taunting me?
It still pained me that I saved his life.

I felt like spitting into his face. He disgusted me so much that I preferred been in the soak away than been in his presence. My heart boiled. What pained me the most was how he effortlessly blasphemed the bible. I was beginning to wonder if he was human, no he can’t be, he must be Satan himself. I could not imagine a smarter Satan.

Then I did not know how the words came;
‘Except you repent Hades would be empire for ever’

I guess every pain, every anguish and every event in this empire drew me closer to the God I worshipped in our archaic church.

My words didn’t do anything to him, rather he burst out into wild laughter.
I watched him with tears in my eyes. I did not know if I was sobbing for him or I was sobbing for my self. I felt a ball of tear roll down my cheek. I quickly cleaned it to avoid him from seeing it.

‘Oh we are in Hades already, we are beneath the ground. This building is an underground’ he grinned.

Suddenly I remembered what I heard someone say some hours ago
‘Pastor Salami Jacobs is coming in, down the tunnel’
Then my heart had glowed with ecstasy that my savior was coming to me. I never knew it was the devil coming. So this house is truly underground.
I began to imagine the exact location of the building.
Somehow, I could tell either that it was on the outskirt of Kaduna or the state after Kaduna, which is Abuja. I had a feeling that I was not to far from home. But how much console could that bring, when the constituents of home were far from me, they had betrayed me.

‘This is not Hades; this is not the Hades I’m talking of’
My mind was wandering as I spoke.

‘Well this is the farthest place I could go into the ground. For the Hades you talk of, God forbid that I ever go there.’

‘The bible said hell is only meant for the sinners. l I am not a sinner. I have not committed a single sin.’

‘In fact I have a church where I bring multitudes of souls into the kingdom. I save people from sin. I have fought the good fight of faith; I have laid hold on salvation, hence a crown of righteousness awaits me from God almighty’

‘God forbid!’ I interjected

‘You are so bold and I do not know why. You judge, and that makes you guilty of the law. The law says in Mathew chapter 7 verse 1 judge not that you may not be judged. So why are you trying to remove the spec that is in my eye when a big mountain has blinded you eye?’

‘sir-‘

‘You must understand that you do not just take the sweet part of the bible and make your belly sweet. You must take the bitter part as well, that is what makes you a true Christian’

‘The bitter part of the bible that you have not taken is that cannibalism is a sin, cannibals are sinners, and all sinners are meant for Hades!’ I spoke confidently.

‘How many times do I have to show you the bible?’

‘You always quote the bible wrongly’


‘You see you are judging me and that makes you guilty of the same law you are claiming to know’

I wanted to say something, but he came in, so I kept shut.

‘See the bible is so complete. I never knew how to spice the human body when cooked until I had a peep at the scriptures’

He paused and gave me a proud look.

‘Ride on with your bunch of blasphemies’ I said almost in a whisper.
I did not know if he heard, but he did not react anyway.

‘The book of Ezekiel chapter 24 verse 10 to 12 reads;
‘heap on wood, kindle the fire, consume the flesh, and spice it well, and let the bones be burned.
Verse 11-Then set it empty on the coals thereof, that the brass of it may be hot and may burn, and that the filthiness of it may be molten in it, that the scum of it may be consumed.
Verse 12-she hath wearied herself with lies, and her great scum went not out of her,
Her scum shall be in the fire’

‘What do you have to say about this?’ he questioned in mockery.
I could see how easy it was for him to convince my dad about his church. He was so good at turning the bible upside down.

As I observed the pastors big grasp of confusion, somehow it made me doubt my parents the more. He had said that his children never knew he was a cannibal. It is deducible that my parents were cannibals and never revealed it. Was their plan to eat me just as pastor salami had eaten his children? He was so proud with his wrong, he could have convinced my parents to eat me up.

However, why would they ever concur to such invitation? Or wasn’t I their child? If I was then they could not dare it. Nevertheless, the evidence levied against them was so strong, both the ones the pastor had said, and the ones that lied in my reminiscence.

Concerning the verse he had read; I could see the level of his myopic vantage point. God was angry at a city, I had seen it in the previous verse, when he passed me the tablet.
Verse 9 read
‘Therefore thus saith the lord God; woe to the bloody city! I will even make the pile of fire great’
It was a city been addressed and not a female as it depicted.

Something began to bother me.
Was it that he never saw the previous verse to understand how the other verses came about? Why was he so swift in relating it to cannibalism? I looked at his empty pride and vain wisdom; all I could do was shake my head in pity for him.

‘Can you see the Bible has taking my side again?’

‘Really?’ i said with a bit of scorn in my voice

‘Oh res ipsa loquitor, the facts speak for them selves.’

‘Oh I see’
I did not try to argue with him, I just pitied him.

‘Well I told you that you should not just pick one verse of the Bible and confuse yourself, you must go round and be sure the bible is really saying what you think. I will prove it to you again’

‘Let me see another heresy’ I said beneath my breadth. I knew if he had heard that it could result into something else so I just kept my voice low.

‘Ezekiel chapter 5 verse 10 says
‘Therefore the fathers shall eat the sons in the midst of thee, and the sons shall eat their fathers…’

As he continued, I could not help but doubt what I believed in.
Could he be right? Probably cannibalism is just scriptural.

Pastor salami is so gud in turnin d bible upside down. Nice work bro

Collect the holy bible from the freaking agent of evil and read the whole chapter to him.

scon-p:
Pastor salami is so gud in turnin d bible upside down. Nice work bro

mehn, thanks boss.

Damex333: Collect the holy bible from the freaking agent of evil and read the whole chapter to him.

well it seems like he is lookin for an alibi
usually in such quest, pipl tend to seive out thier parts and
leave the rest.

hint- the pastor shoud get home in the next episode.
david would go to bed-
wat would happen.
;-)

EPISODE 35



I thought I had strong reasons why I believed that cannibalism was not just a barbaric act, but also a sin to both God and man. However, when I began to examine these confusing quotes from the bible, a book I so much believed in, I had no choice than to re-examine my philosophies.

Suddenly, some questions began to bother my mind;

‘Why do we have so many cases of cannibalism in the bible?’
On the other hand, why is the bible so vague?

Before I could complete my catalogue of questions, a voice spoke from within.
‘You never took time to study it, so why the fuss’


The pastor continued.
“Maybe Ezekiel chapter 5 verse 10 could still sound unclear to you, it’s no problem. However, I am going to take you through scriptures until you believe that God created cannibalism and appoints cannibals from age to age. Nevertheless, because of the weak brethren, we do not go about telling people that cannibalism is right, eat the dead or do not discriminate cannibals; rather we save their consciences from condemnation by keeping silence.

“Cannibalism is all over the bible as hairs are all over my body. In fact it would take me a week to dish out an introductory sermon on cannibalism, if it were the full subject it would take me all the days you have spent on earth to deliver just chapter one.”
He ended with a taunting grin.

I kept a dummy face.

He continued.
‘I didn’t write the book of Zechariah, but check out what it says, mind you its God speaking here-
Chapter 11 verse 9
‘Then said I, I will not feed you: that that dieth, let it die; and that that is to be cut off, let it be cut off; and let the rest eat every one the flesh of another’

“I do not know if you took note of the last portion of that verse?
It was a command, not a choice.
It was emphatic not empathic; He did not consider the flesh of the person been eaten, He did not say that everyman may choose to preserve his son or daughter if they look beautiful. He stressed it out without missing words. Let everyone eat the flesh of another! Who are you to question the authority of God?”

I did not say a word; there was actually nothing to say.

“Your Thomatic heart may still be wobbling between two choices, it’s not your fault, your former church had bathed you in the waters of confusion and deception.”

He cleared his throat
Back to Deuteronomy 28 verse 57
‘And toward her young one that commeth out from between her feet, and toward her children which she shall bear: for she shall eat them for want of all things secretly in the siege and straitness , wherewith thy enemy may distress thee in in thy gates’

“Now you may not understand that verse very well, when the bible said ‘for she shall eat them for want of all things’ you may think he is talking of poverty. However, you must understand that for economy of words God may choose to use ambiguous terms to convey more than one message.”

“Now ‘the want of everything’ there means for the want of all the blessings of God.
She shall eat her children because she want to obey the full scripture because full scripture begets full blessings. For the want of the fullness of Gods blessings, she takes the bitter part of the word and becomes a cannibal. You may not understand the blessings that comes from been a cannibal. That is the underlying interpretation of that verse”

“I understand the concept so much and that is why I make every member of my church an Ignoramus Volturis. Fine, they may not be aware and probing like you, but its for their benefit, so that every worshipper may enjoy the fullness of Gods blessings. That fullness can only come by cannibalism” he was firm.

I began to think.
For Gods sake, God was pronouncing a curse on this country; it was no blessing!
It does not sound like some commandment or a standing order to eat humans.
God made his stance clear from Genesis when He said that whoever sheds man blood, his blood also shall be shed, for man is created in the image and likeness of God
They taught us in church that God cursed Cain for just killing his brother, what of if he had eaten his flesh; probably that would be death on the scene
I watched him to see how much more confusing verses he held.

“Well that wasn’t all,” he continued
“God also promised us the flesh of our enemies, he said we could eat them, and make our belly full.”

“Isaiah chapter 49 verse 26 reads
And I will feed them that oppress thee with their own flesh; and they shall be drunken with their own blood, as with sweet wine: and all flesh shall know that I am the Lord…”

“This verse was what changed my perspective about cannibalism, to a more perfect form. It was not just about God giving us the flesh of our enemies to our enemies, it is much deeper, and if you are not sensitive, you may never understand.
As a true worshipper, you must delve into the intent and purpose of God for making any law whatsoever. As the lawyers always say, ‘equity looks on the intent and not the form.’”

“It was then the light of the word shone on my heart, glory to God, that day I understood that God preferred his enemies been killed and eaten. It really does not matter who eats the flesh, but it would be more beautiful if his children do so, if they can.
From that day on, by Gods grace I direction my teeth and proboscis to the flesh and blood of my enemies.”

“I eat those who threatened to expose me, and those who pose a threat to the country in a way I don’t like. Well, that is why during elections, I am usually the richest man on earth. I use capon as a face, I kill our enemies, and I sell lots of humans to politicians for rituals, well that’s by the way’

He paused and shot me a funny gaze.
‘I see you are getting convinced?’ he asked with a smile

‘I think so’ I lied’

‘Wow, that’s lovely by the time I’m done you, you would wish that you spent your few years on earth cannibalizing’

‘You wish’

‘What did you say?’

‘I said it’s just a wish by the way’

‘Sure it is, but more than a wish, an error. A deep error that you would love to mourn for. You would want to beg me to spare your life, so that you can cannibalize with zeal. Maybe I could consider that’ he gave a bold grin.

Turning me into a cannibal? never! I rather die!

‘I see’ I replied

“Now the last thing I would like to prove to you before I go, and probably before you die, is the existence of so many cases of cannibalism in the bible.
Often times it was as a result of famine, but it was always a proclamation from God to the people, to enjoy cannibalism”

“Enjoy?” I spoke out unconsciously.

“Oh, you have no idea how sweet the human part is”

“I hope someone finds you as a sweet delicacy some day” I shot at him.

I taught I had just insulted him, but to my surprise, he laughed it away.
I failed again to bring him down to an emotional state of realization

“Isaiah again, chapter 9 I will start reading from the end part of verse 19…”

I smiled at his deception in my mind.
He was always fond of not reading the whole thing. I could not decipher if that was ignorance or a bunch of deceit well seasoned with foolishness.

He continued
“No man shall spare his brother,
And he shall snatch on the right hand and be hungry; and he shall eat on the left hand, and they shall not be satisfied: they shall eat every man the flesh of his own arm.”

“That is one scene, lets ride on,” he said
“Ezekiel 5 verse 10,
Therefore the fathers shall eat the sons in the midst of thee…it’s like I have read that before, have I?”

“I thought you said it would take you a week to say the introduction on cannibalism. We have not gone a night and you are out of bible verses? I thought they were as the hairs on your skin. Probably you don’t have much hair after all”

I did not know when I said all that. My heart was beating, I was scared, yet the words just rolled out of my mouth with ease.

The pastor watched me closely, speechless for some seconds.
“Are you mocking me?”

“No you are mocking your self”
I said that in my mind, it did not dare jump out of my mouth.

There was silence.
I knew silence could breed anything, even death. My right hand man had already fallen asleep. However, I could not trust his sleep. He was asleep some minutes ago when he killed grasshopper.

“Does it look like I am mocking you? I was only getting to accept the bitter-truth that cannibalism is not just scriptural, but made and approved by God. I was lost in the awesomeness of your explanation of the bible. I was riveted. I never thought my beliefs were wrong, I never knew that my philosophies were inconsistent. But by the time you began to shed light in the darkness of my ignorance, oh my God! I could not help but cover my face in shame. Then suddenly, like the outage of light in our country you ran out of scriptures…”

“I can never run out of scriptures,” he said proudly.

“Then prove it”

“I told you before that it would take me the whole of the years you have spent on earth to tell you a bit.
This was just the tip of an iceberg.
Where would I have started? Would it have been Necro-Cannibalism, which is the eating of the dead?
That alone would take your entire child hood before you became a teen.
Or would it have been the histories of the Binderwurs of central India? Or the great Shaktism cults in England?
Or the history of cannibalism in Congo and Zaire basin?
Oh I can tell you of all the forms of cannibalism…”

“But we were talking about the bible and not the history of cannibalism in the secular world” I interjected

“So what is your point now?” he questioned showing a bit of frustration.

“My point is that you give me more verses in the bible where God approves cannibalism, probably I could believe in cannibalism and also believe that my former church fed me with lies and not you feeding me with lies”
By this time I was sure that he had ran out of stuff. I was determined to mock him to the face.

He looked at me with amazement and slight confusion
“What is your aim?” he asked

The question was undoubtedly coming from a confused person.

“Aim? How do you mean? I do not have an aim. You said I was corpse, dead, cadaver, and have no use. Besides, you and not I have the passionate aim to kill me. I have no aim; can a dead man have an aim or dream? Just as you said, ‘you have no future you are as good as death!”
I did not let a single fear consume me.

“You talk as if the fear of death hasn’t engulfed your mind like a big embrace.”

“Didn’t you tell me not to fear? Didn’t you quote the bible saying; I shouldn’t fear them who can only kill the body, but do not have the power to throw the soul into hell? Why should I fear? You said I was going to be suspended in purgatory where the effectual fervent prayer of the Volturis Empire would throw me like a handball into heaven. Didn’t you say all that? Why then should fear hold me like the embrace a loved one?”

This was mockery, and I was ready!

“Fine, its good you took it” he replied defeated.

“Back to the bible verses Pastor Salami Jacobs”
I called his full name so that the mockery could sink deeper.

Suddenly he stood up from the sofa.
It was as if he wanted to take a good position to shoot me.
He looked at me for a while and then shook his head,
“You think I do not know other passages?” he spoke softly.

“Of course you don’t” I said in my mind.

“You want to test me?” he asked

“Test? That is impossible”

“The book of second Kings Chapter 6 verse 25 to 29…”

“Oh you have said that before, that was the first instance of cannibalism you gave. It talks about two women who ate their children, but one was so stubborn. You called it the first instance of cannibalism in the bible.”

I could not keep the laughter that was bubbling like an effervescent gas in my stomach.
It flew out. I tried to control it, but it coughed out to a jeering laughter. I could feel the way the laughter bit the pastor, like the sting of a bee.

I could see the sudden anger in the pastors’ face.
He really would have blowed-off my head, but he just stood watching.

My right hand man suddenly woke up and stood up.
I said it, his sleep was fake, I knew he was coming to finish me. Probably he had been pretensciously eavesdropping all this while. I wondered what his perspective on cannibalism was like. Or probably he could be as foolish as the pastor or even worse.

My gaze immediately shifted to him. He came closer to me, his broad shoulders even as he approached.
He did not say a word, just the way he had acted when he killed Grasshopper.
I turned back to the pastor, as if asking him if he had made communication to my right hand man.
His expression was blanc.
The silence was killing.
Suddenly, I began to fear death again.
I knew I had stepped on the python’s tail.

Hahahahaha, you own don catch you finally.

Damex333: Hahahahaha, you own don catch you finally.

mehn no be small tin o

Kudos to you. You don make the man look like mumu.

gameboy727: Kudos to you. You don make the man look like mumu.

na so

NEXT UPDATE-
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Wow. . .wow. . .wow! Intriguing!!

This is really nice. You write just the way i'd like to write. The message being passed, the teaches, adventure and the rest of it; that's how i would wanto write.

I'm now your number one fan ow. . . .

Lemme read the earlier updates
.
.
.
Please update soonessst. . .

E<R>F:
Wow. . .wow. . .wow! Intriguing!!

This is really nice. You write just the way i'd like to write. The message being passed, the teaches, adventure and the rest of it; that's how i would wanto write.

I'm now your number one fan ow. . . .

Lemme read the earlier updates
.
.
.
Please update soonessst. . .

not too fast, numb 1 fan ke, abeg go and queue for back, na me dey numb 1 spot

Boy u dy try.

EPISODE 36

As the silence sustained between us, my heart pounded the more with giant stamps.
What is happening? I only said things the way they were. It would be the peak of childishness for him to want to rebuke me.
Would he take responsibility for his slowpoke information that are nothing but sketchy ideas? I knew I had mocked him, I had laughed at him, he deserved more, why then am I scared, scared of what, dying?
No, I should not.

It was certain that no matter what I did before the time of sacrifice would change nothing whether such actions be good or bad. I was made ready for sacrifice and nothing would bring it closer or take it farther. My submission or rebellion would not count; so why should I be courteous of my words anyway.

This was the beginning of my rebellion against the Volturis Empire. But how far would it take me, I mean how far from my grave.

I shot my right hand man a horrible stare; he returned it, wondering what was wrong with me. I turned from him to face pastor salami. After looking at him for a while, I spoke.
‘Why the sudden silence?’

He did not answer immediately; he was looking at the ground and swinging the little bag in his hand. It was as if he was gathering words to fire me.

Was he angered but shut up in a corner? Probably he felt like shooting me right away but because I was not to be killed yet, he felt his hands tied. Such scenarios could be provoking at times.
I laughed at him in my mind.

I was just having my day, Friday would be his, but anyhow I should live mine to the fullest.

He did not say anything for about ten seconds.
Then he raised his head and looked at me.
Our gaze sustained for few seconds, and then he spoke.

‘Do you try to mock me because my memory of the verses fades for some seconds? Would I not be a fat liar to say that they had faded? ’

I wanted to say something but before I could form the words, he continued.

‘Just from my head without looking at a paper I gave you numerous passages of the bible where God ordered cannibalism. All that was from my head, yet I could still remember lots of them right now if I wish.
But you are so dumb, I created a scene of me forgetting so that I could walk away to my home and see my wife. I made it seem like I forgot and you took the bait. Now you try to pose wise by all your words of sarcasm. I would not have bothered saying anything, rather I would have just walk out, taking defeat, but scorning your foolishness in my heart
However, upon close examination I felt I should show to you your bunch of foolishness’

I took a deep breadth, and as I exhaled, I exhaled into a wicked smile.
‘Am I now so important to you that you have to construct a scene of forgetting your lines to walk me out from your sight? What am I to you? Could you not just walk out? Or how should I believe that you did all these protocols for a dead man’

I could feel the way the words struck him.
One thing was obvious, he was so poor at making lies, or probably I was so smart at catching liars.

‘So blind, I wanted to see what you would say’ he responded immediately


‘Then why not prove it by giving me five bible verses on cannibalism; this time they mustn’t relate to famine. Verses with straightforward commands where God says we should cannibalize, point blanc, no indirect speeches, but crystal clear verses that you wouldn’t have to explain anything but the obvious facts would speak for themselves’

‘You think I have all the night here? For crying aloud, I have a wife. How can I seat with a dead man and talk, while the living wail for my romantic touch at home.
I am not trying to convince you to or make you accept cannibalism. The volturis Empire is large enough. You are going to die after all, so what is the point.
I was only passing time for grasshopper to bring me the succulent parts. More so I just wanted to talk about cannibalism, it has been long I had such deep conversations. Are so foolish to see that it had not been about you?. How many times must I tell you that you are only a dead man in the habiliment of the living?’

It was funny how suddenly I became so relevant to this man in so much that he could create sentence upon sentence to defend himself before me, me of all people, a ‘dead man’

‘You tried to be sly to a dead man when you could just walk away? Why, what is the use? If truly, it wasn’t about me and you debating some inconsistent philosophies of yours…oh You can bear me witness that is if you want to witness in truth, that all of a sudden you had excess of ‘defense’ which were locked up somewhere in an un-located faculty. Prove it to me if you are for real, prove it, if your philosophies had not tangled you in the web of your own dilemma, prove it, stand for what your belief and I would follow you’
I made my face tight and bold.


Suddenly before I could properly form the last word, I received the hottest slap of my life.
I had forgotten that my right hand man was right behind me at 45 degrees.
It was obvious that he had ran out of patience, he always did. His hand was rough; as hard as stone. The slap came from behind me with maximum aggression. It covered my ears, burned my cheeks and one miserable finger sunk into my eyes.

I crashed on my knees immediately, writhing in pain. My eyes saw galaxies; my ears rang like ten church bells ringing concurrently. I sunk my face into my palms, my face was terribly sore. However, for the first time in the Voturis, I did not feel sorry for my self or actions, rather I cursed beneath my breadth.

‘Are you mad?’ pastor Salami barked within range.

I wanted to shout back at him, and say

‘What have I done to you that you ordered this fool to slap me? Are you not guilty of not knowing what you believe in as you ought to? Or can’t you see your magnificent depravity, shame, and childishness? You could not win a small boy, whom you called dead man, in an argument, frustrated, you give in to physical combat. Shame on you!’

However, before I could say anything, I heard grasshopper reply.

He spoke so fast, I could read the anger in his voice.
‘He was so rude, how can someone talk to you like that, pastor you are our head. I had to shut him off, even in our culture, we the Yoruba people do not tolerate children speaking so rudely to their elders. Sir did you not listen to his insulting words, he is so daring, he is disgusting mehn!’

‘But I didn’t order you to do so’

‘You didn’t order me to kill grasshopper when I did it to save your life, now you are a living soul, thanks to me for saving you. This time I was not saving your flesh, but some thing more important to you than your flesh, your reputation. Would you then chide me for doing so? Would you spank my ass for saving you? Judge it between us. Look at your acrimonious reaction to me; you embarrass me before and because of this wild thing?’

‘You saved me and I am grateful for that. I know you didn’t just kill grasshopper for my sake but you found it an opportunity to take his stead’

‘No sir that was not my intention even though I would love your blessings and promotion’

‘You did that for selfish reasons and do not ever mention it to me again’

‘Sir how could you-‘
But the pastor shoved him with his hand

He continued
‘You said your culture taught you respect, is it part of your customs to discipline a child in front of his father, when his father is rebuking him. Is it right?’


There was silence for some seconds, but it was not absolute. My right hand man was grumbling something beneath his breadth.
Suddenly it was like his irate rose to an irritable level that he could not contain any longer.

He spluttered
‘In fact I do not even know what you see in this dumb ass. Was he not supposed to be locked up some where in the rooms, until he shall be sacrificed for the appeasement of these foul spirits wandering in the air and troubling our souls?’

‘Sir with due respect, why are you giving him all this special treatment is it necessary? Now judge this sir, because of this boy our brother died, and now we are having this quarrel still because of this boy, this snoofabitch!’ he emphasized the last word.
His voice left an impact that commanded initial silence.

‘What special treatment have I given him?’ the pastor asked after some seconds

He cleared his throat.
‘Sir for the fact that he had you for hours speaking deep things with you is enough to be called special treatment.
In fact, he was not to be aware of the sacrifice. We wanted to fool him with the word ‘chosen’. But you came and had pleasure in him. You told him things, he heard grasshoppers story. You unveiled the hidden meaning of the word chosen, when priest had advised us not to do so for the boys emotional state.

‘ You even wanted to kiss him but he pushed you away. He pushed you away, when we all were there, wishing we could have you’ he became more emotional
‘when was the last time we had a kiss?
This boy had all the time talking history of cannibalism and looking at scriptures with you when last did we do that together. Yet you call me your wife, your second wife. When did I of recent seat with you and argue things on our beliefs, cannibalism, and talks… but yet this boy…this corpse..argh!’

The words struck me like a gun shot. So this guy was a hell of a gay man. Pastor Salami calls him wife. I could not hold my disgust.
So what the pastor said then when he tried to kiss me was true.
He said addressing them
‘Didn’t your bodies rise when I tried to kiss him?...’
All these men are gay! I was assured for the umpteenth time.
But this demon, was hetero-sexual

‘Are you now jealous of a dead man? Didn’t I tell you I do not enjoy gayism any more? I told the house that gayism do not please me as a wife would do. Ive lost the deep passion. You are ugly after all. I have sucked you lips enough and there is nothing else to suck!’
He brought his voice a bit low
‘His own was fresh and it brought to my memory the good old days. Have I wronged you? Or are you now jealous of a dead man’

‘How can the living envy the dead? It’s not possible’

‘Then what is the problem? I only passed time with him and now I am on my way, is that too much?’

‘Sir I’m sorry, I just got upset at his behaviours, the way he talks is as if he knows more than you or he is even wiser than you. The other time he laughed at you, all these are very provoking sir. I know you are an upright man and may not want to recompense evil for evil, so I just had to what I did-you know I love you‘

‘It is okay, come close’
They sandwiched in a passionate embrace.
I heard pastor Salami whisper
‘I don’t mean to say you are ugly, it was a mistake. I love you to’


…………………………………….


The sudden pain that came from the sudden slap melted gently like wax, although I still had a little bruise fom which a tiny pain evaporated.

With my face still stuck into my palms, I marveled at what I was going on above my head, I could not understand why the pastor was fighting for me. At the same time, I was marveled at the love that ensured between these two shameless men.

It was very annoying that I had received this face-wrenching slap just because a Juliet was fighting for her Romeo. I had never seen gayism in this fashion, this obvious, this deep.

Anyway, I still marveled at the pastor take on my side. It sounded preposterous

Somehow, I began to see that behind his heartless heart was a soft spot for me he really did not want me dead. I wonder if he could stand it. Somehow, I had unconsciously saved him, and now somehow he had unconsciously fought for me, and rebuked my attacker, even when my attacker was his lover. Would he be man enough to kill me?

As I asked my mind that question a bold clear voice replied within me
‘That hasn’t changed his status from DEVIL’
That was true, and then I considered an obvious truth. Probably there is nothing like a soft spot for me. He is only attracted to me in a gay way. He wishes he could have me but God forbids that ever happen.
I had never seen such a disgusting man all my life.
‘PASTOR Salami’ I called the name in my mind, emphasizing the word ‘pastor’


At last, I stood up.
As they discovered I did they refrained from their embrace.

I gave my right hand man an irritating look; he returned it. The hatred that existed between us was terrible. And so it grew…

‘I should be on my way’ the pastor said.
I did not know if he was speaking to me or to his love.

My right hand man helped him carry his bag, the bag that contained the head of my love, Sandra. It still pained me that I lost her. I got her so fast and lost her so fast. The pain of her departure rose in me, streaming from my heart and rising like a fountain, in no time my whole body was in the pool of internal pain.
What does he even want to do with the heads?
I guessed as a calabar man, it must be a peeper soup.
A pepper-soup with my lovers head? May God punish you!

What is next? I asked myself.

The pastor suddenly turned to my right hand man.
‘This boy must not have the slightest inkling to the way out of this Empire. Do not trust him; he is smart. Don’t let him out-smart you’

As I heard the pastor spoke, I was glad he acknowledged something, the fact that I was smart. I grinned, but it was all imaginary.

‘I know he is smart, but he is not smarter than me. I caught him in the lavatory with his phone, he was trying to make contact.’

‘Are serious?’ he asked surprisingly, shooting me a spiteful gaze.

‘Yes, but the fool did not know that I was not far away, and in a snap, I caught him red handed’ he gave a vain smile.

I laughed in my mind. How could someone claim coincidence for his smartness, he must truly be the fool. He caught me because he was just lucky. So he had kept things to himself all this while so that he could make his brag, and claim smartness when time demands he proves ability, like now. It was funny to me, but concurrently, foolish.

‘You see, keep the bastard save’

‘Yes sir’

‘And take the phone to priest, he must ensure there is no bug in the phone’

‘But its not possible’ he smiled

‘I do not trust his father hundred percent, just in case’

‘All right sir. Sir the priest said he should stay in the same room with the girl, what is your take on it’

‘I am the king of this empire, and the priest is next to me, whatever he says must be done. You know how much I respect him. I cannot go against his words’

‘Fine sir’

‘Take him now, before I leave’

‘Yes sir’


I followed him as he went towards the door that led to the passage where I had met Amanda.
I knew another face of my life in this Empire was just about to begin.
What would happen to me when Salami is gone?
But thank God I would finally see Amanda…but who is this priest talked about?