Yippie! This will be the first post on Inspirati!™, the newest section on .com for the soft things of life and I am hoping you will like it! Okay, being a parent is a huge, huge task! It is easily the most tasking job on earth, and to worsen matters, there is no salary or allowance and don’t even dream of taking a leave! But like Henry Ward Beecher said, we never know the love of a parent till we become parents ourselves. The 21st century is no doubt a very challenging period to be a parent. Combining the stress of jobs and social engagements with your parenting life is more hectic than a three-day traffic jam on Lagos-Ibadan Expressway. To make life a little bit easier (and interesting) for parents, there are seven things you MUST discuss with your children. As in, you MUST. If you have been overlooking this before, it is time to change o! Communicating meaningfully with your child is extremely important. Let’s do this!

1-GOD
Although it must be stressed that is not interested in people shoving down their faiths down other people’s throats, you need to educate your kids about God. Do not misunderstand me, I am not saying turn the brains of your tiny tots into jellies or bamboozle them to the extent that they are not capable of any creative or rational thinking. Whatever religious training you will be giving your children, let the summary be based on the fact that love is the highest form of worship. Teach them to love others, serve humanity, with special emphasis on kindness, mercy, compassion, spirituality, reason, tolerance, justice, forgiveness, courtesy, confidence and respect. Teach them all that God abhors and that the same God created all that exists. Do not train up your child to become a fanatic who is nothing but a nuisance to the community.

Let them appreciate people of other faiths and respect their beliefs. Let them know of the deep mysteries of life and that there are some questions that do not (or may never) have answers. Teach your children peace and how to reach it within themselves, with others and with their Creator. Before you can do this, you need to be sound yourself spiritually. So teaching your kids the divine powers of the Universe will benefit you as a parent. If you are an atheist, you still owe it to your kids to let them know the basis of your (un)belief. That one na task number one.

2-SEX, SEX and SEX
Yes ke. Seks! I know this is not the most comfortable of topics to discuss. Even some married couples find it very difficult for them to yan themselves the koko about the koko (me I don’t know why). But if you do not educate your kids about sex, the society will misinform them, usually with devastating consequences. If you are not too sure as to when to start the discussion on the great topic of sex, just observe when they start asking curious questions, kids are naturally curious and they will ask you funny stuffs like how women get pregnant or some scenes they saw in a movie or even an advert poster in town. Do not tell them nonsense about how watermelon is inside your pregnant wife’s belly. Explain to them in the most relevant and enlightening way. The world has changed and they get to know all this eventually, but in the wrong way. Do not demonize sex before them, it will only stoke their interest and at the same time, do not glamourize sex. Other topics related to this include menstruation, contraceptives, safe sex, abortion, dangers of extra- and pre-marital sex and many others. Observe your kids and entertain all their questions. Consult with experts if you are still lost BUT never let anyone else teach your kids about sex. IT IS YOUR JOB. And if you do not, it is your FAULT.

3-MONEY
For many of us, our parents are civil servants who know absolutely nothing about money. They have spent all their lives toiling for salaries even if that has not stopped the cycle of poverty. Have you noticed that civil servants (I am not talking of the fat thieves stealing at the parastatals and looting the federal civil service) are always complaining of money, and are always in debt? Teach your kids what they will not teach them in school: how to make and keep money, of course, in clean ways. Teach them how to save, let them know the worth of money, the dangers of debts and why they must fight poverty. does not subscribe to the trash of ‘some of us have to be poor’. Let them understand how global trade and commerce work and do not just rush them through school and expect them to look for jobs and become debt-ridden civil servants too. Nothing bad in being a civil servant but let them know about multiple streams of income. Teach them how to economize and not be like our stars and celebrities who buy N15 million jeeps after they get their first N20 million. This will also help you a lot as a parent. But do not teach them to be excessively materialistic. Enlighten them on the importance of wealth and ways to achieve it. The Yorubas will say iran meta kokin toshi (three generations do not perish in penury). Some families have reached the tenth generation.

4-ALCOHOL, DRUGS and other similar substances
Even if you are a brewery or smoke like a chimney and have used almost all the narcotics in the British Formulary, educate your children about dangers of these substances. Let them know the effects of consuming these chemical substances. If you love your kids, you need to let them stay away from these noxious substances in the society. I repeat, even if you drink like a fish and smoke like an Indian locomotive, let your kids be aware of the dangers of such a lifestyle. If you have shame, you will not even do such things in their presence. I cannot imagine a responsible father smoking in the presence of his ’3-year-old angel’. Remember the words of James Baldwin: “Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.” What you put into kids, they give back to the society. Do not give the world blind drunks and stinking addicts.

5-DEATH
For many kids, the first time they experience a death, it is usually a huge shock for them and they become totally bewildered or even scared to the extent that some begin to have nightmares. Then they begin to ask you awkward questions like ‘When is granny coming back’? or ‘When will my rabbit wake up?’ Death is a mystery even to adults so you can imagine how the brains of kids try to process the loss of a beloved one. Do not wait until a tragic moment before you discuss the inevitable end of all humans with your children (or just assume that with time, they will understand), and groom them on the most realistic way to react and how they will cope when you are no more. Take it one step at a time and calmly answer all their queries (which I tell you, will come in torrents). There is no better teacher than the (responsible) parent. Roger that…lol!

6-THE INTERNET
In a world where many adults themselves have a vague idea of what the Internet is, this can be quite challenging for many parents. But it is what you can learn (before your kids outsmart you…lol!) It is quite important to let them know from a very early age the clear dangers posed by the Internet and the incredible benefits that they can also accrue from it. Most likely, when you were growing up as a parent, the Internet was not an issue and your parents might not have given you any tutorial on cyberspace but as a modern parent, times are changing and if you want your kids to survive and excel, you must adapt as a parent. Be Internet-savvy yourself and do not wait until they talk of promotion in your office before you hurriedly learn Microsoft Word…lol!

7-TIME
Yes, time. Let your children know that the very essence of life and existence is time and he who wastes time squanders away his life. You really do not have to stress yourself to do this. You can start from the basic measurements and units of time such as seconds, minutes, hours, days and years. Explain to them the importance of a microsecond. For example, you can illustrate to them that Usain Bolt is the fastest man on earth simply because of tiny fractions of a second or draw schedules for their activities so they will have a focused and goal-driven view towards life and not just live from day to day without any sense of direction. Teach them to value time and hopefully at the end of the day, you will see that you have not been wasting your time. I leave you with a quote from Barbara Johnson: “To be in your children’s memories tomorrow. You have to be in their lives today.”

Very best of wishes and thanks for your time!

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@op, very well written, love it.
@all, its never too early and not too late to educate your kids on some of vital issues of life by the parents, because if we as parents fail to do it, others will do it, and most likely in a wrong way.
May God help all parents.

Nyc one....i like

Good one. God bless.