'Honey, I'm feeling very cold', she said, and he took off his coat and draped it around her. She smiled gratefully, resurged by the crescendoing warmth within.
The storm continued unabated, making nonsense of the umbrella they both shared. It was barely big enough for one person, not to talk of two persons seeking shelter from it. Seeing this, he decided to bear the rain, and gladly abdicated his position beside her. She gratefully snuggled onto the brolly handle, smiling at his drenching figure in the rain.
Her shoes were designer models, which he had bought for her on her birthday the previous week, in addition to a blackberry phone, but for which he would have gotten his car engine fixed.
This caused her great concern, for she feared that the flood in front would forever smear the look of those shoes if she stepped with them into it. Her bag was already full, and she couldn't carry it, the brolly and the shoes together. He had a ready solution, and from his pocket produced a water proof bag, with which he carried for her, her shoes. She smiled patronizingly, stating how much of a darling he was.
Getting home, he remembered that he had some calls to make, and had, in the rain, forgotten to purchase vouchers for his phone. He asked her if she had some credit, and she hesitantly replied in the affirmative, but when he asked if he could make use of it, she shook her head in the negative.
'Why?' He asked, perplexed.
'Cos I have some calls to make too', she snapped. 'You should have bought some credit just now', she railed on. 'Since when did you become such a pest?'
He looked at her, dumbfounded, wondering and asking himself what LOVE really was...
THE END

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MY FRIEND: I'm getting married in two weeks! I'm so excited, hope you'll be there?
MYSELFslightly envious) I'm so happy for you. Where's the venue?
MY FRIEND: HSBC, Apapa.
MYSELF: That would be great. I will try to make it.
MY FRIEND: You must! It will be so lovely! You must meet Jim.
MYSELFwondering who's Jim) Is that HIS name?
MY FRIEND: Yea, he's such a lovely and amazing person. I'm so much in love (clutches her bosom).
MYSELF: Oh, but I thought Tolu was equally lovely and amazing?
MY FRIENDsuddenly serious and seemingly irritated) Oh, that? We broke up 2 months back. He's one of the worst things that have happened in my life.
MYSELF: Really? Just like that after...how many years?
MY FRIEND: Three wasted years! We weren't meant for each other - we were never compatible.
MYSELF: That's not true; at least we always saw a different picture. Even my boyfriend told me about Tolu's love for you - you know guys don't hide such things from themselves.
MY FRIENDIrritated) Please, stop. Did he pay you to do all this?
MYSELF: No, just thinking aloud. Anyway, (feigning a smile) I wish you all the best.
MY FRIEND: (jumping on me excitedly) That's all I need from you. Thanks.
MYSELF: But, don't you think it's too early to talk about marriage?
MY FRIEND: It's never too early. He's unlike Tolu who was forever planning. He paid my rent even before I agreed to date him and bought me a new Blackberry phone, something I had been begging Tolu for, for months.
MYSELF: How did Tolu take it?
MY FRIEND: Who cares? I no longer had feelings for him and I was so much in love with Jim.
Myself: (convinced she fell for Jim's money) It is well. I wish you all the best.
*********
Five months after marriage. My phone rings. It is MY FRIEND.
MY FRIEND: Hello, good morning.
MYSELF: Oh, dearie! How are you doing?
MY FRIEND: I'm good... How about you?
MYSELF: (notice her sulkiness) Are you okay? You don't sound well.
MY FRIEND: That bastard! Do you know this is the third time he's beating me?
MYSELF: Who're you talking about?
My friend: Who else, but Jim! Because I accused him of sleeping with other women, he’s turned me into his punching bag!
MYSELF: (calmly) You mean he's sleeping with other women?
MY FRIEND: (barks) Do you think I'm joking? He started since my pregnancy became obvious and rarely gets home before 11pm every night.
MYSELF: (Thinking aloud) Too bad. What kind of man beats up his pregnant wife?
MY FRIEND: A monster! A bastard! I regret the day I said “yes” to him. Tolu never raised his hand against me, not even when I was irritatingly annoying.
MYSELF: (remembers my boyfriend telling me only a few days back that Tolu was in love again) Too bad. At least Jim is very generous (I know I’m being sarcastic but can’t help it).
MY FRIEND: Not anymore. He made me resign from my job and has made me a full-time housewife. I rarely go out, except, probably to the church and market.
MYSELF: It's well. But, I'll advice you to bear it all. Marriage isn't a bed of roses... Maybe he’ll change; we strive to...
MY FRIEND: (cutting me off) The bastard just drove in. I will be dead if he catches me making this conversation. I will get back to you later…
MYSELF: Okay, dear, but... (the line has already gone dead)...Too bad.
THE END

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