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Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) - Family (38) - Nairaland

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My Elder Sister Is Feeling Suicidal / Are you feeling angry right now? Let-off steam here! / Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by thorpido(m): 8:18am On Mar 23, 2016
Noneed77:
I feel so dejected and unhappy with myself right now. It feels like a mystery to me that these things keep happening to me at the same period over the years.

It started way back in 2013 February to be precise, i felt sick and got admitted in the hospital. No body could detect what the problem was as i was placed on typhoid and malaria drugs. The sickness came with severe cough. The doctors had to discharge me even without recovery. It was later around April i discovered i had TB (that was after my three weeks orientation camp) let me say it was by the Grace of God that i survived it. I did test and it was confirmed that i had the virus. It took me some time before i recovered after taking the drugs for months.

In February again 2014 towards the end of my youth service, i met this girl (youth Corper also) and we started dating. Though it didn't last long but i must confess through out the duration of our dating i had no peace of mind. Its always one problem or the other. I can't say if the girl actually duped me or not but i spent alot for her out of my small allowance. There this guy that she was dating before we met i even had a little clash with him over her. She told me so many things about him that it's me she wanted. That the guy had connection and frozen her nysc account. That was what made me fell to the extent of spending for her. I spent roughly about 30k on her. Everything later ended.
Few months later God helped me to secured a contract job which i saved about 600k. After the contract i bought a car for business purposes. Though my family were against it but i didn't listen to them. I used few months to learn it.

Around January 2015 i started the work but i discovered it wasn't what i wanted. The business wasn't moving fine so i made up my mind to sell it.

In February 2015 when i was about selling it, i got involved in an accident that condemned the Car, i even had to use the remaining money left with me to pay the car i damaged because i was at fault (that was after police intervention)

I lost everything and back to square zero.

I went into sports journalism and seems to be doing well and even earning from it.

So i made up my mind to start living alone. I rented an apartment but before parking in, my family kicked against it saying why should i start living alone when i have sister that we have being living together for long. That it doesn't make sense but i didn't listen to them i went ahead and bought everything and parked it. The very day i finished everything that was when my eyes opened after calculating the money i spent (roughly about 30k because i paid half of the rent . I became angry with myself. Now i am thinking of renting out the room and sell everything that can be sold then return to my sister.

Why i am i taking the wrong decisions even when i advised not to? Why sad events keeps happening to me around February and March every year. Must i be involve in one thing or the other that make my life unhappy? Is it because i am still jobless? I am just confused about everything. I don't feel happy

I don't see anything strange happening to you.You are just making bad decisions based on the fact that you do not think through before taking actions.In life you go step by step and not just rush into things.
From the things you wrote,you go contrary to good advise from your family and that has been your greatest undoing.In as much as there is nothing wrong taking decisions on your own,you can also make do with good counsel.Begin to listen to you family and good friends whenever you decide to make decisions.Seek their opinions even if you won't follow their opinions,consider and weigh them.
As per your health,sicknesses can come at anytime to anyone.You just need to learn to prevent diseases by maintaining good hygiene and presenting yourself early at a hospital if you have symptoms of any illness.
When it comes to women,if a man does not date the right woman,it can be akin to pouring water into a basket.You need to use your head more than your heart when it comes to women.
Wish you well.

2 Likes

Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by GenyEbere(f): 8:26pm On Mar 23, 2016
Ggggg

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Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by thorpido(m): 10:45pm On Mar 23, 2016
GenyEbere:
I felt like ending it all on sunday but thank God for the baby kicking inside me that keeps reminding me that he need a life,I have a husband who sees nothing good in me,insults me my mother relation at any slightest opportunity,no physical abuse but the emotional abuse is killing,he wants to do as he wish,dont question him even if he comes back 12am,my opinion is useless cos he doesnt need them,we dont talk now simply because I told he has time for other activities except church,he never allowed me to work,he has money and boasts about it and want me to virtually beg him for everything else he wont provide it,leaving is not an option cos I cant have custody of my kids cos of no source of income,i like being independent but he wants me to be crawling and begging him. How do I handle this situation already am depressed.
Sorry about your situation but truth be told,you didn't lay your foundation properly.Were you the one who chose not to work or he made it a condition for you in the marriage?No woman should go into marriage without a source of income except by mutual consent.
Your husband can't change.He has always been and will always be that way.
Whatever it is,you will have to get a source of income and become independent.Abusers usually don't want their partners to work so they have control over them.Leaving the marriage might be an option for you.You might not be able to get custody of the kids but you will have your life back.
I know someone in an abusive relationship who just left the house with the kids.I don't know if that could work in your situation.

Taking your life is not an option.You've got kids who need you.I'm sure you have a family too-parents or siblings.They need you.

4 Likes

Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by GenyEbere(f): 11:06pm On Mar 23, 2016
Gggg
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by thorpido(m): 7:49am On Mar 24, 2016
GenyEbere:
I didn't lay the foundation well,he suggested I quit to have the kids and I agreed thinking thats the best for me but later realised I made a mistake,Am praying God to help me have my life back either in it with him or out,he has unforgiving spirit and believes God will answer his prayer while holding a grudge
1 Peter 3:7 says,
'In the same way,you husbands must give honour to your wives.Treat your wife with understanding as you live together,she may be weaker than you are,but she is your equal partner in God's gift of new life.Treat her as you should so that your prayers are not hindered'.
Show your husband this scripture.

I don't know if your husband has anyone he listens to - an elder or pastor.Let such a person talk to him.I feel however that your husband is set in his ways from the way you describe him and such men rarely change.What you should do is begin to look for opportunities to earn an income.Get financial freedom.Your life may continue with him or may not.
You deserve happiness in life and should not be tied down with anyone who takes away your joy.
Taking your life is not the solution.

2 Likes

Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by GenyEbere(f): 9:36am On Mar 24, 2016
thorpido:
1 Peter 3:7 says,
'In the same way,you husbands must give honour to your wives.Treat your wife with understanding as you live together,she may be weaker than you are,but she is your equal partner in God's gift of new life.Treat her as you should so that your prayers are not hindered'.
Show your husband this scripture.

I don't know if your husband has anyone he listens to - an elder or pastor.Let such a person talk to him.I feel however that your husband is set in his ways from the way you describe him and such men rarely change.What you should do is begin to look for opportunities to earn an income.Get financial freedom.Your life may continue with him or may not.
You deserve happiness in life and should not be tied down with anyone who takes away your joy.
Taking your life is not the solution.
thank you very much am relieved by just talking about it

1 Like

Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by PresVA: 9:41am On Mar 24, 2016
GenyEbere:
thank you very much am relieved by just talking about it
Hi, I think you should get a source of income, it will go a long way helping you out of the situation. ..
All d best. .. Remember, this is just a phase, it will pass smiley

3 Likes

Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Knetpro(m): 10:46am On Apr 07, 2016
Tgirl4real:
The thoughts of starting a counselling/encouragement thread for people that are depressed or suicidal had been on my mind for a long time now. I wanted to create an avenue where they can open up and get solace from people around here.

Please let's share...

Thanks for this great post.

With the deplorable situation in the country right now and the much-desired change by Nigerians still far from being realized, it is normal for people to develop suicidal tendencies.

This is a welcome development indeed.

Kudos to you and keep up the good work.
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by sky2000: 11:05pm On Apr 11, 2016
thorpido:
I don't see anything strange happening to you.You are just making bad decisions based on the fact that you do not think through before taking actions.In life you go step by step and not just rush into things.
From the things you wrote,you go contrary to good advise from your family and that has been your greatest undoing.In as much as there is nothing wrong taking decisions on your own,you can also make do with good counsel.Begin to listen to you family and good friends whenever you decide to make decisions.Seek their opinions even if you won't follow their opinions,consider and weigh them.
As per your health,sicknesses can come at anytime to anyone.You just need to learn to prevent diseases by maintaining good hygiene and presenting yourself early at a hospital if you have symptoms of any illness.
When it comes to women,if a man does not date the right woman,it can be akin to pouring water into a basket.You need to use your head more than your heart when it comes to women.
Wish you well.


I think you have a point, sometimes you have to think far and take your time well!!
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 1:01am On Apr 22, 2016
I got admission in 2014/15 session, but deferred until this session because I had many older siblings still in school. Well. My mom was hoping to raise some funds for this session but all our efforts fell short. It seems i may lose this admission since there is no money to even defer this session.
I have been attending lectures since january and we are about to start the 1st semester exams this month. My course adviser told me that once exams are through all patments and registrations are definitely over.
I am so so depressed about this. I will definitely kill myself if i drop out.
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by yoursloyaly: 2:42pm On Apr 22, 2016
Well what can I say? I ran my life down by myself and I have disappointed everyone that cares about me, although they do not know it. I am dying in silence because I cant begin to tell anyone what I've brought upon myself. I know if I had been more honest and open to people, I wouldn't have ended up like this. Now it is too late to make amends because I would break my people's hearts. I am currently "homeless" because of how neck deep I have gotten. I hope I sleep and never wake up.

1 Like

Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by scampy(m): 6:48pm On Apr 23, 2016
yoursloyaly:
Well what can I say? I ran my life down by myself and I have disappointed everyone that cares about me, although they do not know it. I am dying in silence because I cant begin to tell anyone what I've brought upon myself. I know if I had been more honest and open to people, I wouldn't have ended up like this. Now it is too late to make amends because I would break my people's hearts. I am currently "homeless" because of how neck deep I have gotten. I hope I sleep and never wake up.

I will advice you make peace with your people by talking to someone that you believe should be able to help. It might be an elder in your family or a religious leader in your faith. Try to erase that thots of sleeping without waking up.

Remember, there is always a way if only you seek for it. Peace.
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by scampy(m): 6:50pm On Apr 23, 2016
timonski:
I got admission in 2014/15 session, but deferred until this session because I had many older siblings still in school. Well. My mom was hoping to raise some funds for this session but all our efforts fell short. It seems i may lose this admission since there is no money to even defer this session.
I have been attending lectures since january and we are about to start the 1st semester exams this month. My course adviser told me that once exams are through all patments and registrations are definitely over.
I am so so depressed about this. I will definitely kill myself if i drop out.

Cc: Bellong
Thorpido
Tgirl4real

TeHN
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by thorpido(m): 8:40pm On Apr 23, 2016
timonski:
I got admission in 2014/15 session, but deferred until this session because I had many older siblings still in school. Well. My mom was hoping to raise some funds for this session but all our efforts fell short. It seems i may lose this admission since there is no money to even defer this session.
I have been attending lectures since january and we are about to start the 1st semester exams this month. My course adviser told me that once exams are through all patments and registrations are definitely over.
I am so so depressed about this. I will definitely kill myself if i drop out.
How much is your school fees?
Can you open a thread seeking for help for your school fees?You have to be authentic because you will be subject to scrutiny.

1 Like

Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 8:44pm On Apr 23, 2016
thorpido:
How much is your school fees?
Can you open a thread seeking for help for your school fees?You have to be authentic because you will be subject to scrutiny.

I need #80000 to complete my school fees. https://www.nairaland.com/3064609/appreciate-input
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by thorpido(m): 8:57pm On Apr 23, 2016
yoursloyaly:
Well what can I say? I ran my life down by myself and I have disappointed everyone that cares about me, although they do not know it. I am dying in silence because I cant begin to tell anyone what I've brought upon myself. I know if I had been more honest and open to people, I wouldn't have ended up like this. Now it is too late to make amends because I would break my people's hearts. I am currently "homeless" because of how neck deep I have gotten. I hope I sleep and never wake up.
Your story reminds me of the story of the prodigal son in the bible.One very important part of the story is that the bible says,'he came to himself'.He said i can't continue this way.I will go back to my father's house , even if all I can get is the treatment of one of my father's slaves.
You will have to let people know things are bad and to what extent so you can receive help and be rehabilitated as it were.It's not too late to make amends.Yes you will break some people's hearts but it will be the beginning of your recovery.
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 9:01pm On Apr 23, 2016
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by bellong: 2:11pm On Apr 24, 2016
@timonski,

How much have you raised?

When is the deadline to pay?

@yoursloyaly,

Do you care to talk about it?

Know that it is never too late to turn back. Realising one's mistake is a giant step to solving a problem.
Don't back down in making amends.. Tell your people and I am sure, someone will find a place to take you back and excuse your folly.
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 2:38pm On Apr 24, 2016
bellong:
@timonski,

How much have you raised?

When is the deadline to pay?

@yoursloyaly,

Do you care to talk about it?

Know that it is never too late to turn back. Realising one's mistake is a giant step to solving a problem.
Don't back down in making amends.. Tell your people and I am sure, someone will find a place to take you back and excuse your folly.
The deadline is 1st week of may, sir. I need ~ 150k for school fees and other fees. But since I have raised ~N68500 I need roughly 80k.
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by justme2000: 1:13am On Apr 25, 2016
21
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by thorpido(m): 7:55am On Apr 25, 2016
justme2000:
I want to ask a question here and I need real judgement.

Where did I get it wrong?

Here is my story.

I was 30 when I got married just 2 years back.

Though I came from a very very poor background, I have God's favour, I was gainfully employed over the last 8 years and even before I met my wife, I was an international employee working in the best places in the world. I had real money from my hard work.

One committment I have made to God is to love and cherish the woman I will eventually marry. I dont womanize, no smoking and no alcohol.

Ever since I met my wife even before we were married, I do send her 80% of my monthly income. Basically she gets almost all my hard earned currencies as I do not earn naira.

I boght a house even before we met and when we got married, I completed the house taking 2m naira from her.

Suddenly the unforseen happened, I got suspended from work do to downsizing. Came back to Nigeria fully and tried to seek alternate employment. Eventually got one and left again due to same downsizing. Since the last 3 months I have been seeking another employment, meaning I am jobless.

Now my wife brought her brother 4 years younger than me to live in the house without seeking permission from me. I had to over look it to avoid family issues.

She is the violent type that always slap and tear my shirt at every little argument and because I have decided not to hit a woman in my life, I will just over look everything. I have had to replace her phones twice because she smashed same out of annoyance.

So this time, a little argument came up and she ended up tearing my shirt. So i had to slap her.

Then I got the shock of my life.

She started explaining telling her brother that

1. My hands are unfruitful as I have been experiencing bad luck to the point that I dont even earn a kobo
2. That she feeds me and my family
3. That this house she bought it with her money and all the assets in it so she is tired of helping me.

Jesus, I was shocked as I could not imagine this.

I worked really hard to make sure this woman is comfortable.

Sent her around the globe including the bahamas with this same unfruitful hand.

Paid house rent at 2m/yr using this same hands before I decided to complete the house i had bought as a bachelor.

Besides completing our current house, I furnished it fully with this same unfruitful hands

Sent her and her mum to the US when we had our baby with this same fruitless hands.

So my question is, is it bad for a man to treat his wife right?

If you were in my shoe, what will you do?
Seems your relationship was a long distance relationship.That means you probably didn't know your wife well enough.You should have known what her temperament is like and decide if you wanted a violent wife(using your words).
One other bad part of your foundation is showing your wife too much money from the beginning of your relationship.Why send so much money to the one you are dating when you are not her father?Moreover,you said you came from a very poor family so you should have family members to take care of.I hope your wife didn't marry you just for the money.
You should double your efforts to get a source of income so you have something to bring to the table.You should have saved enough too while you worked i hope so you have something to fall back on.
You should help your wife control her anger(talk to her about it when she is calm and let her attend anger management classes if she can.Since you have also started to slap,you both should work on managing conflict.

1 Like

Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by AUTOCHECKN: 9:38am On Apr 25, 2016
Hmm
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by dominique(f): 6:31pm On May 03, 2016
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by hpk(m): 5:24pm On May 24, 2016
The past is only alive if you keep it alive. You can’t change yesterday but you can build today for tomorrow. Don’t shackle yourself with regrets. Don’t start feeling sorry for yourself. Whatever your previous circumstances, others have gotten through the same or worse. Appreciate yourself as a tested survivor: strong and determined. Learn from the past but don’t assume that your past automatically
equals your future. Instead, fill your life with anticipation. Set your goals. Write your to-dos. Just because you haven’t done something before doesn’t mean that you can’t start doing it right now. Be the new, dynamic you. Right now. Cheers!!!
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 5:28pm On Oct 05, 2018
my life is really tough at the moment. I have always suffered all through my life until now.

I suspect I have a mental illness. I have always wanted to go to Yaba to get my head checked out, but have always managed to put it off.

No work for a while now. the freelancing site where I worked suspended my account and seized all my funds.

No one to ask for help. The entire universe is against me it seems. no food. no hope. everything is very bleak. I am a good person, I work hard, but maybe not smart. No one to give me a little push until I stand on my feet.

What is the point of it all??

In my apartment, no light, no food in the kitchen or pantry. no petrol in the gen. no nothing. life too hard. I can easily rest more if I didn't have this body which I owe a lot of attention to.

If I were an amphibian, or a ghost, or mere air, I wouldn't have to suffer voices or severe despondency all the time. My world is gray. I have sought color all my life but it seems the universe decided I would never live in color. Grey seems to be my lot. Grey and a lot of black.

I started taking care of myself at age 14. I am 25 now and things are still very difficult. I have started so many ventures to help my situation but my mental predisposition does not allow me to concentrate. I keep hearing voices in my head. Two years ago, I explained to a friend of mine what was going on: the voices, the anxiety, and depression. He suggested that I take up weed. That was the worst decision I ever made.

After just two minutes of inhaling a goodly amount of the weed smoke, I have my first episode of psychosis. I had never experienced anything like before. I was taken to a hospital where the doctor gave me injections to calm my heart down and send me to sleep. I stayed in the hospital for two days and then discharged. But since that episode, my life has not remained the same.

Two months ago, I was hit by a series of serious misfortunes that shook me to the bone. I couldn't work so my clients on Upwork fired me.

I am at an all-time low and I am beginning to question the meaning of life. To me, life has no meaning. I reckon if I leave now, in another 80 years everyone I left on earth will meet up with me. I don't fear death. I have actually made my peace with death, but I do not want to die.

However, I don't know how long I can hang on. I am desperate and my situation and brokenness have killed my spirit. I seriously want to give up.
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by THEMODSARECRAZY: 5:46pm On Jan 29, 2020
I'm most likely to die anytime soon, hopefully someone finds my body and buries me on time

1 Like

Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 10:42am On Jan 30, 2020
Knock knock

1 Like

Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Darkseid(m): 10:52am On Jan 30, 2020
Lynette2cute:
Knock knock
This one you're knocking here, don't tell me you're feeling suicidal sad sad

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