People do not stay the same, which is why it's important to continuously learn about your spouse! I know I am not the same person that I was at 17, when I first met my husband, and he is also a different person! We all change, grow and adapt in life and our personalities totally reflect that! Listed below are 7 important reasons to continuously learn about your spouse... let's go!


1. CHANGE

As I mentioned briefly above, we all change as time passes. This is the most dominant reason to study and learn about your spouse and how they operate. What they like and dislike, what their hobbies are, or even favorite foods, are continuously changing! Think about what experiences you both have gone through together that have shaped you individually and as a couple.


2. INTIMACY

The more you know about your spouse, the more intimate you become. It really reaches into the depths of who they are when you know every little bit about them - the good and the bad! It makes sexual intimacy way more passionate because of that deep connection.


3. RESPECT

It's good for us ladies to know that men speak the language of respect while we speak the language of love. Showing interest in what your spouse is interested in displays a deep respect for who they are! Learn about what interests your spouse and do it together!


4. HUMILITY

We have no problem doing what we love to do because let's face it, we're prone to selfishness. Investing in your spouse and their personality traits and what makes them who they are not only allows you to know them better, but also humbles you a bit because you're not focused on your own interests!


5. LOVE

What better way to say "I love you" to you spouse than to get excited about their interests and passions? It's so nice to learn as much as you can as often as you can about your partner. They will definitely feel loved and totally blessed!

6. GIFT GIVING

Another great reason to continuously learn about your spouse is to know what things they like so you can find the perfect gifts for birthdays, holidays, or just because! I always feel so blown away when my hubby gets me a gift perfectly suited for who I am, not only because it means I got a great gift, but also because it means my husband has really been paying attention to who I am right now, and what I want!


7. EXCITEMENT

Lastly, it's really just exciting to continue to learn about your partner! It's almost like you're dating again when you find out new things. There's always something new to learn and it's fun to see them grow and change and develop interests and hobbies. As the years pass, this excitement can mean the difference between a lifelong love, and a temporary one... and that's a big deal!

It definitely takes work to continuously learn about your spouse! You must be willing to observe, ask questions, be engaging and most of all be a good listener! Having good listening skills is essential for building trust and openness.



What are some fun, new things you ladies have learned about your spouses that you'd be willing to share?!

(Culled from a community blog )

Nice thread Jide

Now here's my two penny's worth:

8. COMMUNICATION:

As you grow older in your union with your spouse, you learn how to communicate better with them. If like me, you started off with a gra-gra approach to solving problems, you learn with time that it's better to stand back, take deep breaths to fully access a situation first before jumping in half-cocked. But most importantly, you get to understand him better, so things that seemed like a big deal at the start of the union won't really seem so on later years.


9. TRUST:

Yep, trust. You learn to trust each other better and don't feel the need to live your lives in each other's pockets. You aren't joined at the hip so you learn to let go. You even get to understand that it's healthy to give yourselves some breathing space and also some valuable "me time".


10. TOLERANCE:

All those annoyingly, niggling little habits of your spouse that used to get you going, make you wanna hit the roof top...you learn how to live with them or find practical ways / solutions to the "issues". You learn through experience how to reach a compromise and not lose your cool. All in all, you two grow together with each other and learn a lot through experience.

Keep it coming Efe. Very insightful and helpful Points.

*yawn* but I need to hit the sack now. Nite

jidegirl12: Keep it coming Efe. Very insightful and helpful Points.

*yawn* but I need to hit the sack now. Nite

Night for you, morning for me...

Morning babes

Nice one jidegirl.That humility one really is something I have learnt esp when dealing with trying to accept my husband for who he is; and not trying to 'bend' him to suit me (and my family ).

Also good points by Efe and CC.Tolerance dat one na good one again.Yorubas call it amojukuro (sorry cant translate it but I think it means tolerance to an extent ) is very important in dealing with certain issues. I had to learn that we are two different people brought up by different people in different backgrounds(in our case very different locations and religions) so of course we wont always have the same POV on most most issues.

By the time I finish all these, there will not be a " me " time.

Let me add my own..

15. Learn how to argue and quarrel..., use the opportunity to chill out alone and have a you time.

after, come back, cry and make sweet love. It kinda reset the clock.

^^ #15 already??
But you're right , 'me' time is very important in a relationship, but learning how to fight and going thru all that emotional process you outlined up there is what I don't understand but different strokes, as long as it rocks your boat .


Good points CC & Dami, @Trust his judgement and tolerance ( amojukuro- (let go) part) are both coordinated, even tho I trust him as a person, still it took me a while to cut loose and relinquish many things for him to take over.. .. ... then as we grow older together and l realized I don't have eyes behind my head and I want to spend the rest of my life with this guy so why should I overburden myself when I have a partner who will do a good job.

And Humility ... Don't even get me started on what I have to embrace and accept.

Where's , Byvan and co?

chaircover: I am going to add my 2 kobos worth and that is to

Trust his judgment
That was hard for me. I grew up being taught to be very independent and I can do many things myself. I had to learn to leave certain things for him to do and to trust that he will do them well . . . and if he didnt do them well this time, there is always an opportunity for him to get it right next time.

That is like an advice directed at me.

Jide,byvan is a prayer warrior in health section naw.(U know now)

My 2 kobo.
SPACE
Everyman needs his space at times especially when everything and everybody is becoming too choking.

^^ I know

Space / Me time is very crucial too.