I remember my days of using the Blackberry messenger which shows the delivered and read icons, and even more recently Whatsapp, which shows the exact timing you were last active. If you use any of the above platforms in communication, then you will understand how annoying it is when someone fails to acknowledge your message when it is obvious it has been read. It is even worse you experience this social rejection in real life.

Imagine being in a relationship or talking with someone exclusively for some time and all of a sudden no goodbyes, no words…They just vanished into thin air. How do you even begin to comprehend it? How do you get closure? There is mystery in silence, as it could mean a thousand and one things.

The silent treatment is a phenomenon most people would have encountered at some point in their lifetime, and too often it is being treated with triviality. Silence is a very problematic way of communication which suggests distress tolerance and poor emotion regulation skills; it is also classified as a form of emotional abuse.

I did a little research and found out that silent treatment is highly manipulative, involves emotional game-playing which is destructive to relationships. When repeatedly used in a relationship, this silent treatment will often eventually lead to the opposite of the desired outcome because many people will get tired of repeated manipulation and will pull away. Hence, people who engage in this type of silent treatment often alienate people and sabotage their relationships.

Let’s call it for what it really is; it is bad behavior that inflicts emotional hurt on its recipient. This way some people may never heal and they become permanently scarred. The cycle of hurt would not cease; hurt people, hurt other people. Whole-hearted people value communication and honesty regardless of any situation. Anyone who still uses this approach definitely needs a change in behavioral pattern.

If you have ever been on the receiving end of the silent treatment, how did you deal with it? Share your story let’s talk about it...

If someone doesn't reply and you are not even in a relationship, it's obvious he / she doesn't want to communicate. No answer is also an answer. I don't consider it a problem. If someone ignores me, then I will not bother to contact this person again.

Just like carefreewannabe said, "no answer is also an answer".

As a matter of fact it just happened to me this morning, greeted a female friend through whatsapp she read it and logged out, still I remixed the greeting and she did the same thing...so without outwright answer she has given me her reply and the message has been passed.

ITS FRIGGING SO ANNOYING
Like u chattin wit d person on BBM and doesn't read nor reply bt den u see dat person ONLINE on whatsapp

As if its nt same phone

I get that a lot...it's normal for you to start conjuring a lot of things in your head when you receive the silent treatment. That's why effective communication is the key to any sort of relationship.

It is done mostly by dumb gals. They think it makes dem important. You are chatting with a gal, you type two sentences which require a good response but all you get is "k", "lol, "hmm" etc all of which u get after minutes of waiting. I delete such contacts straight cos they r dumb.

Dyt: ITS FRIGGING SO ANNOYING
Like u chattin wit d person on BBM and doesn't read nor reply bt den u see dat person ONLINE on whatsapp

As if its nt same phone

yea anty theriz a trick on bbm datz not so rampant but i usualy du it wen m thinkin of wat to reply ...wereby u wil send mi a message on bbm and i wud read it but u wud stil b seein dat "" sign if i dnt riply u for lyk 1yr d "" signa wud stil b dr while av read ur text 1yr ago @op it more annoyin wen sum1 reads ur mesage and dnt reply buh changin dp and statz i even rmove my blood bro on watsap b/cos he ignored me nd even my yunga sis on bbm b/cos she snobed mi but she lata started givin me lame excuse 4 not r/ply but its painful tho

Silent treatment, a silent killer. I fear it more than rejection, that's why I hardly talk to people.

And if I manage to talk to you and you don't reply, I shut you out. You can't force somebody to talk to you. No?

Life must go on abeg!

I really wonder y people do dat a lot, most especially if u and de person didn't hav any misunderstanding. Some after ignoring u for so long will only remember u wen dey need ur assistant. And it even happens on Facebook chat, especially those girls that guys are always responding to their wall posts, dey dey feel like "celebrities". I always delete such friends, no wasting time.

What about the silent treatment given here on NL...?






Yeah..., most of us will say it's a faceless forum...! But it's so annoying when one ask s/one a kwesion and there's this silence thereafter:@

Instead of vain talks and unreasonable comments is better to keep mute so you can pass the message across.

Juell: I really wonder y people do dat a lot, most especially if u and de person didn't hav any misunderstanding. Some after ignoring u for so long will only remember u wen dey need ur assistant.

You are so right bro. I usually feel bad when i experience dis. But from wat ave learned on this post i feel its best to delete such contacts totally.

If i may ask how do u respond?

I think this has just killed my relationship, wen I talk my girl, she's use to chatting wit me nd another person, only God knows who the person is?
I complain everytime abt it, bt just seems like am the nagging type...ok...decided to keep things to mysef, adjust within my brain, no complain on anything, now she says she doesn't Trust me again. We both started having compiled issues upon issues until it got out of hand...now we just have to go seperate ways...

Ymodulus:

You are so right bro. I usually feel bad when i experience dis. But from wat ave learned on this post i feel its best to delete such contacts totally.

If i may ask how do u respond?

I always tell them how I felt, tell them "now that u need my assistance u remember me right". And I won't do what dey ask me to do, like one dat asked me to like her post or something to help her unlock an application on her BB (pixmix) I refused.......lol