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You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : - Travel - Nairaland

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You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by pafun(m): 12:46am On Jul 04, 2008
You know you have arrived in Lagos when :

1. the traffic policeman is carrying a baseball bat.
2 and in VI a madman and a cripple are directing traffic while the traffic police watch without interest


How you know say you done arrive naija ?
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by jekkad: 12:53am On Jul 04, 2008
by d time u see all those agberos on d street collecting chop money(they call it owo weekend and owo weekdays)
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by spoilt(f): 3:39am On Jul 04, 2008
when I drive along the highways and see people emptying their bowels (and i mean emptying! Yuk!) along the sides of the highway eg around ijora.
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by kadman(m): 6:16pm On Jul 06, 2008
and in VI a madman and a cripple are directing traffic while the traffic police watch without interest


Ha ha !! That's the funniest thing I've seen this week !
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by lucabrasi(m): 9:46pm On Jul 06, 2008
you know you v arrived when i see these boys in the hold up chanting gala yes,gala yes bros buy your gala,
when u get rolex,carter e.t.c in the case n the hold up all for less than 1,000 naira lol
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by dnative(m): 11:09pm On Jul 06, 2008
when you hear these phrases:

anything for your boys - from the boys (no pun intended) in black
your boys dey road o - same as above
oga you wan change, dollar, pound, euro, I get am for beta price - from the mallam changing forex
piyoooooor water here - from your mobile sales executives  grin
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by kingdong(m): 12:30am On Jul 07, 2008
You know yes this is lagos when the heat at arrivals hits you like a bat out of hell, getting yu all heated up. angry
Or yu ar somwhere, suddenly power is restored and there's a resounding  UP NEPAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! and yu nod yur head like agama, saying to yurself, this is lagos
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by Nobody: 10:12am On Jul 08, 2008
yeh the heat when you arrive in lagos at airport the heat alone you feel and also bad roads,ppl selling along the roads,buses that are not good to be on the road(roadworthy)NEPA self an another issue,keeps on taking light sometimes weeks there wont be light for no reason.well still love 9ger and proudly to be 9ger
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by 8ball(m): 11:06am On Jul 08, 2008
when the long queue of traffic during those rush hours periods jolt u back to reality,u'd realize that oh yes!,vis is Lagos indeed
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by ayomifull(f): 1:46pm On Jul 10, 2008
Wen u arrive late in the evening and while d plane is landing u look down and all u can c is electricity in 1% of d whole city grin
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by Reese1: 3:26pm On Jul 10, 2008
You know you have arrived in Lagos when:

-Before your plane even lands, you've already experienced death by heat smiley

-Upon arriving at the airport, you're in the line to go past immigration and a group of people behind you just start saying "Awon oloshi", "Oloriburuku ni awon people yi now!" Bi won she ma gba owo ni o wa lokan won, oshe oju wonko wonko *hiss* , just straight cursing out the airport staff lol grin

- When you finally get to "baggage claim naija style", you get in shine your eye mode real quick to make sure your bag has not been nicely taken. Scratch that, you better be in shine your eye mode as soon as your feet touch the ground.

-So you finally get through immigration, baggage claim, you're minding your business walking out of the airport, and some random dude walks up to you asking you to show some jagbajantis documents. angry

-You walk out of the airport and there are no less than 300 people standing outside the airport at 7:30pm at night just waiting, and waiting, and waiting,

-Your phone goes dead (in my case) and you're looking for a phone to use; about 6 different guys come up to you instantly (they must have smelled a money making opportunity grin ) to ask you if your phone is dead and you can use theirs, for a fee. undecided

-Your ride is an hour and a half late to pick you up cuz of "go-slow" lol
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by gem87(f): 2:11am On Sep 14, 2008
When that heat hits your face once u step out of baggage claim
there are touts or tout-looking people evrywhere
people are staring at you like u're a different colour
and everyone other than those you step out of the plane with seem darker than usual
random people are cursing each other
something like:
madam, respect yourself oo ,
and madam goes: abeg go and sit down, do u know who i am?
am still trying to get through immigration and blurt out welcum to Nigeria
and fellow travellers double up in laughter?
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by MrCrackles(m): 2:15am On Sep 14, 2008
pafun:

You know you have arrived in Lagos when :

1. the traffic policeman is carrying a baseball bat.
2 and in VI a madman and a cripple are directing traffic while the traffic police watch without interest


How you know say you done arrive naija ?

grin
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by Morenike3(f): 2:16am On Sep 14, 2008
When you smell the nasty thick air

When the sun beats on ya back

When there are no spaces between the cars

When you hear "$pure water pure water N5"

When you see too many ugly men in one place

When you hear "Give me my money"
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by MrCrackles(m): 2:19am On Sep 14, 2008
*Morenike:

When you smell the nasty thick air

When the sun beats on ya back

When there are no spaces between the cars

When you hear "$pure water pure water N5"

When you see too many ugly men in one place


When you hear "Give me my money"


shut up

ugly woman dey talk!
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by blackspade(m): 9:12am On Sep 14, 2008
-When your plane lands at night, you only see lights in V.I.
-The heat instantly intimidates you when you arrive
-If you have on anything that resembles a rapper, people will try and sell you their tape cheesy
-You can't see the original layer of road
-When you notice the air to rapidly decrease in quality

only a few, add more later cool
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by Morenike3(f): 12:51am On Sep 15, 2008
Brash!:


shut up

ugly woman dey talk!
Doyin, which one is ya own. Make I talk or waka from my face jor. shior
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by blackspade(m): 7:39am On Sep 15, 2008
grin grin grin
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by MrCrackles(m): 9:13am On Sep 15, 2008
*Morenike:

Doyin, which one is ya own. Make I talk or waka from my face jor. shior

hahaha

relax naw, why you come dey vex?! grin

anyway howz u, be easy!!!
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by komekn(m): 4:24pm On Sep 15, 2008
When your guys see you and do not say Hi, Hello with restrained, hushed voices in low tones with false smiles observing the dictates of decorum and supposed civil society.

BUT!!! jump out vocal chords screaming, Hail your name, bear hugs, hand slapping, then you take off, literally in the car horn blaring, in fact everybody’s horn is blaring , Welcome! Welcome!! Welcome!!! And you want to say slow down, watch out for the speed cameras and then you realise you are Home again what a relief, thank God I'm back and glad to be back. grin shocked grin shocked grin shocked grin shocked cool cool cool
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by kobomoje(m): 2:52am On Sep 16, 2008
u kno u r in lagos when u hear, "oshodi! oshodi!! oshodi!!" "wole pelu change e"
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by Busybody2(f): 1:36pm On Sep 17, 2008
When you mistakenly stop at the traffic lights, and people start blaring their horns at you and raining curses on your forefathers and call you JJC. grin
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by mybad: 1:44pm On Sep 17, 2008
When everybody is in a hurry and yOu see uniformed men with milk coloured shirts and red shorts branded LASTMA by the side of the roads.
When you keep hearing insults from motorists on the highway or loud remarks of ORIE O PE or AYE A BAJE NI.
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by Busybody2(f): 1:53pm On Sep 17, 2008
When commercial buses rudely barge into your space whilst driving and insult you and call you names and taunt you for being slow, then mistakenly collide with your car, and then start prostrating and begging you to please forgive them, madam 'd' madam nothing spoil grin
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by ezeagu(m): 3:22am On Feb 09, 2010
ayomifull:

Wen u arrive late in the evening and while d plane is landing u look down and all u can c is electricity in 1% of d whole city grin

1% of which city? You mean car headlights? grin
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by OgidiBoy(m): 3:28am On Feb 09, 2010
ezeagu:

1% of which city? You mean car headlights? grin

If I'm not mistaking, 50% of ppl living in Lagos have generators.

For me how I know I've arrived is the HUMIDITY shocked shocked
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by AjanleKoko: 10:17am On Feb 09, 2010
When all you hear is noise. People conversing at the top of their voices, horns blaring, dogs barking, a cacophony of noise!
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by tkb417(m): 7:10pm On Feb 09, 2010
chei
9ja don suffer grin grin grin

wahala dey o
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by snowdrops(m): 9:35pm On Feb 09, 2010
The immigration officer at the airport [arrival] starts demanding 500 naira tip/bribe
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by lekside44(m): 11:18am On Feb 11, 2010
you see the three status.
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by lekside44(m): 11:28am On Feb 11, 2010
or probably the status of eyo which was stolen sold or what ever by the president, governor, govt official or knocked down by a reckless boat/ship driver or maybe it is still there , but the absent of nepa light and lack of fuel to run the gen will not make us see it. we could have used a radar to track its position either above or below the ocean, but sorry, our radar is outdated, probably the one installed by the British who bombarded Lagos in 1861. well, i cannot even see the map of Lagos from the Google map, maybe Lagos has been sold off or given to republic of Benin as they did to bakasi
Re: You Know You Have Arrived In Lagos When : by Nobody: 1:14pm On Feb 11, 2010
the smell of rotting garbage hits your nostrils, forcing u to double over, hide under the car seat, stuff ur nose with tissue, stick ur head in a bag, ANYTHING to escape the smell, all the while people are walking past/driving past as normal.

frankly anytime i travel by road, i know i'm back in lagos just by the smell. even when i'm asleep. minus the garbage dump, lagos has an offensive smell, once ur nose breathes clean air somewhere else.

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