texaco1:
then be ready to marry as many men as possible , because no sensible man will take that from you , except he is banging somebody else outside and doesn't care a hoot about you or what you do

funkybaby: why do i need my man's permission before i build a house

of course i will inform him before i start but that does not constitute seeking his permission.

its my hard earned money and i can spend it however it pleases me as long as I do not put my finances or the family in jeopardy

texaco1:
then be ready to marry as many men as possible , because no sensible man will take that from you , except he is banging somebody else outside and doesn't care a hoot about you or what you do

Messilo: @op Mitchewwwwww to you, you expect kids here that have not marry before, that have no experience whatsoever; to advise you matrimonially mitcccccchhhhhhhhhhhheeeeeewwwwww to you again.

funkybaby: why do i need my man's permission before i build a house

of course i will inform him before i start but that does not constitute seeking his permission.

its my hard earned money and i can spend it however it pleases me as long as I do not put my finances or the family in jeopardy

funkybaby: why do i need my man's permission before i build a house

of course i will inform him before i start but that does not constitute seeking his permission.

its my hard earned money and i can spend it however it pleases me as long as I do not put my finances or the family in jeopardy

gbanikiti: there's nothing wrong in a woman building houses and acquiring properties. Maybe the posters wife felt he would not approve it. To me,I don't need anyone's permission to build houses. Its my personal decision.

smartchoice: No man deserves to be treated like that!
Outta your life send her immediately...but wait plot it well, don't confront her @ all...till you're ready to send her packing....BTW check your children's paternity...urgently I TRUST NO MAN OF GOD!..... Confirm and be sure they're your children n not the Father (no one is a reverend!)
Stop eating her food or drinks....POISON 101,

funkybaby: why do i need my man's permission before i build a house

of course i will inform him before i start but that does not constitute seeking his permission.

its my hard earned money and i can spend it however it pleases me as long as I do not put my finances or the family in jeopardy

nayef:



You will surely end up single!

Law-confessor:
Nawa oo! Dis one na real yawa.

One can say affirmatively dat d rev MAY be having an affair wif her already.

As it stands now, its beyond wot u alone can handle- i do not c it as a bad idea at dis juncture to involve som certain ppl,<strong> lik d rev. in ur current parish,</strong> urs/her close relatives.

I must commend u for not finkin d "grin" word for d sake of ur kids.

Pray Hard too n may Holy Mother Mary Intercede for U.

gbanikiti: there's nothing wrong in a woman building houses and acquiring properties. Maybe the posters wife felt he would not approve it. To me,I don't need anyone's permission to build houses. Its my personal decision.

2ndChance: I have seen similar threads on this topic before but never imagined it could happen in my marriage.
My wife and I have been married for about 10 years now and we have been blessed with both male and female children. For the first 7yrs of the marriage, I earned about 8x my wife's salary and everything was sweet and rosy. We were the envy of most families with houses and landed properties both in the village and the city where we live. But about 4yrs ago, my wife got a better job which made her salary slightly higher than mine. But more importantly, the new job gave her access to bulk money by way of loans, grants, etc and ever since, my family has never been the same again. My wife suddenly became unruly, she doesn't consult me on any issue concerning the family again. I have sat her down on countless occasions to know what the problem is but she refused to say what is responsible for her sudden change in attitude. Even when I seek her opinion on projects concerning the family, she shows indifference most times. I then resolved to continue to engage her and be as open as I can hoping that things would improve and indeed I really noticed some slight improvement. But when I was about to settle down and relax, I got the shocker of my life -my wife had built and completed a building without my knowledge! As if that was not shocking enough, I later found out that the man who has been fronting for her on the said project is the same Priest (Reverend Father) that joined us in holy matrimony!!!
I am really confused right now, having mood swings between laughing and angry at the same time. I just don't know how to handle this.

Ujujoan:

I'll give you an instance, when I first got married, I confided in a 'friend' of mine about a habit of hubby's I detested. She pushed me into doing something I never would have done, something that almost crumbled my young marriage but for the love of God. What opened my eyes (and I think that was God's way of helping me out of that dilemma) was when I saw this 'friend's husband doing the same thing I complained to her about, even worse than my husband.

This so-called 'friend' who was advising me on how to 'handle' my husband was doing absolutely nothing about her own husband.

At that point I did a 360 degree turn . . . I apologized to my husband about the way I was handling it and today, by God's grace, he has completely dropped that habit . . . . not for anything I did, but out of his own personal resolve to stop it because it made me unhappy.

Salligreen:

See, this is complicated and not about forgiveness but discipline. Your wife exchanged gifts with a priest and a different priest helped her build a house without your knowledge! Begging for forgiveness after the deed is done is useless, time for you to stamp your authority as a man. And are you sure you didn't maltreat her when you earned more than her? Also, you don't have to sell her house, maybe you guys guy turn it to a family investment and manage it together
You seem to be too religious, you need to stop believing too much in these priests. Its time for you to change some things about yourself, start going to other places to have fun besides the church (don't fornicate!). You've been a good guy for too long and like they say good guys always come last!

Ishilove:
So it is easy to just send the mother of your children and a woman you have spent ten years of your life with packing just like that abi? Is that how they handle marital issues in your village.

It is very obvious you are not married. Shior

nbright: 360 degree... That means you still do the same things..

Chatters:

Well said

FlamingGun: You have received very good advice from most contributors to this thread.

FORGIVENESS IS KEY.

But you should also find out WHY she feels so insecure about sharing critical information with you.

Could it be that she cannot trust your judgment, or is not quite comfortable at your reaction?

Have you in the past abused the privileged information she shared with you?

Many here have blamed the priest. Perhaps dialogue with him in the presence of your wife would clarify things. Could he have acted with the understanding that you were aware of the project?

Please give your wife even more love during this critical period of your relationship. She will not respond well to bullying from you. Genuinely try to LISTEN to her fears and concerns, and address them calmly and maturely. You can actually turn this round into something very positive.

I wish you and your wife the very best.

FG

funkybaby:

***rubs baby bump while flashing fourth finger on the left hand with 18carats diamond ring***

funkybaby: why do i need my man's permission before i build a house

of course i will inform him before i start but that does not constitute seeking his permission.

its my hard earned money and i can spend it however it pleases me as long as I do not put my finances or the family in jeopardy

funkybaby: why do i need my man's permission before i build a house

of course i will inform him before i start but that does not constitute seeking his permission.

its my hard earned money and i can spend it however it pleases me as long as I do not put my finances or the family in jeopardy

smartchoice: No man deserves to be treated like that!
Outta your life send her immediately...but wait plot it well, don't confront her @ all...till you're ready to send her packing....BTW check your children's paternity...urgently I TRUST NO MAN OF GOD!..... Confirm and be sure they're your children n not the Father (no one is a reverend!)
Stop eating her food or drinks....POISON 101,