Segeggs: does your father "give an helping hand" in the kitchen?

Insult not intended.

i think thats were i got this from. my dad is ova 70, and u still see him tryn to help my mum out in the kitchen. maybe becos he once lived abroad sha.

bad meat: I cook for my wife!I help her do the laundry,my friend if u think its easy for the female folks,take a break and do all the chores at home,u will find out its a lot of work!I pay my wife allowances for her trouble!she is my wife,flesh of my flesh!

You get sense.

Miner13: To me i can't leave house work to my wife whenever am at home.
There would day, i would take over evry kitchen work to show her everytime i am better in the kitchen.

Besides!

Whenever couples help each other in house work. The joy knows no bound. What a happy home

You too, but your compostion get as e be.

dayleke: Guys,I think we need to change our mentality when it comes to this.
There are no set rules in when it comes to doing chores around the house.
It's your house too for crying out loud.
There's nothing I can't do around the house.It does not make you less of a man.
I do dishes,cook,clean and what have you?
The same thing that makes you look forward to a hot meal when coming from work also applies to your wifey,
She too is entitled to get that when she gets back from work(provided you are home).
As she is doing the laundry,I'm folding the clothes.
There is joy in sharing na.....

You three!

Some people would do well if they keep some not so useful traditional mental in the box. Things has really changed and still changing. Traditionally it was the sole responsibility of the man to provide for the family in the past. But today, in some families women are providers. Women are taking up career jobs, businesses and vocations, all that in their bids to assist their families. Should these women who may be in better opportunity or privilege to work, sit at home and watch their homes lavish in poverty becos it's not their responsibility to work and provide financially for family? Even when the man of the house is incapable?
Also some men should stop this kiss and tell attitude. U do something in ur family then u go out make it a subject of discussion with ur friends. And after being washed by ur friends u harshly come home feeling bad or even venting anger on ur wife. U r not helping ur home. families differs and hav what works for them, u don't measure ur family base on what ur friends or relatives says. Whatever good for the success of ur family should be ur concern.
A responsible woman will not take her husband for granted for helping out at home
Just like a responsible man will willingly assist without thinking his ego will be tempered with.

Segeggs: does your father "give an helping hand" in the kitchen?

Insult not intended.

Till date, youngman. As a matter of fact he is very good at slicing vegitable, okro, chicken and anything slicable. If we decide to pick beans in his domain (sitting room or out side), he gladly join us. Or is it when its time to do general cleaning? He takes the lead.......I gat no lazy 'asss' as a father.

ITbomb:
I read somewhere about the word 'Help-met'

We live in a different kind of society where men and women both carry equal (or close enough) burden.
So how about helping each other?

Sijo01:


Till date, youngman. As a matter of fact he is very good at slicing vegitable, okro, chicken and anything slicable. If we decide to pick beans in his domain (sitting room or out side), he gladly join us. Or is it when its time to do general cleaning? He takes the lead.......I gat no lazy 'asss' as a father.

doesnt he have a job?

in yorubaland, it is called gbewudani.

angiemartinez: i think thats were i got this from. my dad is ova 70, and u still see him tryn to help my mum out in the kitchen. maybe becos he once lived abroad sha.

well, this is naija and we grew up here.

Omen100:

She like were soft like pawpaw yam. With all honesty, I used to do the same but she took my simplicity for pliability to the extent that she expect me to wash the dishes after friends & family members finished eating and as a native Africa traditional man, I put a final end to all the nonsense play by always sitting in front of the Television like a Boss anytime she is in the kitchen cooking and she dare not say a word. ...

she is your wife bro,no form james bond in your marriage before it...............I didn‘t say anything o!

Segeggs: doesnt he have a job?

in yorubaland, it is called gbewudani.

Its not you fault.

No woman can compete with me in any house work,even my twin sister don‘t compare herself.my girl friend bows to my cooking,always seek for more after eating.When i visit her,i do d cooking while she watch and learn.
Helping a woman out in kitchen shows how humble,how sincere and how you feel for your woman,and there is no joy compared to that.

Beync: Some people would do well if they keep some not so useful traditional mental in the box. Things has really changed and still changing. Traditionally it was the sole responsibility of the man to provide for the family in the past. But today, in some families women are providers. Women are taking up career jobs, businesses and vocations, all that in their bids to assist their families. Should these women who may be in better opportunity or privilege to work, sit at home and watch their homes lavish in poverty becos it's not their responsibility to work and provide financially for family? Even when the man of the house is incapable?
Also some men should stop this kiss and tell attitude. U do something in ur family then u go out make it a subject of discussion with ur friends. And after being washed by ur friends u harshly come home feeling bad or even venting anger on ur wife. U r not helping ur home. families differs and hav what works for them, u don't measure ur family base on what ur friends or relatives says. Whatever good for the success of ur family should be ur concern.
A responsible woman will not take her husband for granted for helping out at home
Just like a responsible man will willingly assist without thinking his ego will be tempered with.

Well said.

If a man can cook and he is able to do some domestic chores very well, by the time he finally marries and he is able to assist his wife sometimes in doing these things domestically, such a man would always be known to be a "true partner" to his wife and immediate nuclear family!.....Afterall, your wife is not your slave!!

tpia@:




Well said.

thank you

uj_sizzle:
We live in a different kind of society where men and women both carry equal (or close enough) burden.
So how about helping each other?

I would not allow u carry equal or almost equal burden with me .
I am the provider , it is my duty n pride as a man to provide for my household .

Segeggs: does your father "give an helping hand" in the kitchen?

Insult not intended.

I cn proudly say my father does give a helping hand wen he cn specifically pounding of yam! He's in his late 50's with a married daughter bt still helps around d house! He didn't grow up rich n even with his sisters around, he's mum insisted d boys participate in house chores. My father does nt know how to cook, bt once it comes to pounding yam, he used 2 help us b4 he got older, n we generally stopped pounding yam. We are all in skul n wen non of d children are around, my father does as much house chores as possible oda Dan cooking cos he's terrible at dat. My parents shared d chores equally as dey are both against getting a house help 4 no specific reason. N to tink dat he's an authoritarian! Even with all dat, u dare nt overstep ur boundaries, to say it's demeaning makes me laff, Cos if u meet my dad, u had neva know such a man will collect a Broom from his 10yr old daughter n sweep cos he thinks she's too tired to. My father is nt perfect bt I will definitely appreciate a husband with dat quality.

Wow! The amount of awesomeness and theoritically accepted views on this thread are quite intoxicating. It makes me want to go into the kitchen right now and wash a few dishes just to prove I can do chores

On second thought, I'm not married yet...so it's very possible that the kind of woman I spend the rest of my life with may just be the kind who cautions, gently suggests or prevents me from performing kitchen duty by saying these words,
"baby, you really don't need to do that...I'll take care of it, it's not so much".

But like I said, I'm not married yet and I shouldn't know or be too sure of what arrangements might be made between my future wife and I after putting things in perspective, as well as putting specific circumstances into consideration. #justsaying

Bullshit ... Arrant nonsense...

How can a Woman be in the home and a man enter kitchen to cook or wash plate..... For what...

If u really want to help the wife , get a maid after the first child.

Nonsense men. Love in the kitchen, no woman that truly respects her man will let him step into the kitchen to cook.... Whaaaaaaat... Why did I marry you, if I wanted to cook wash and fry plantain myself I would not pay that hefty bride price. To wash plate.... If u really love or wife buy her stuff..... I repeat buy her stuff. When u travel, when ur coming from work. When she delivers... E.t.c

DoNt wash her pant.... Ooooooooh

Well it depends on the man...my husband, God bless him never eats and leaves his plate on the table or in the sink. RIght from when we were dating, i think its all in the upbringing. He always washes his plate and if he meets any plate or pot in the sink (very rare too cuz i wash up as i cook) he washes it along with his.

After washing up, he even cleans the gas if its dirty


i clean up the house (light cleaning -mostly our room, bathroom and the kitchen) every day because its just both of us in the house (no kids yet) but every weekend he does better cleaning that includes sweeping, dusting and mopping of the sitting room and all the rooms.

Everybody that comes to our home ways says its like a hotel- always sparkling clean and its all because of his help

Some men are well brought up while some are just natural helpers and thankfully, i married one that is both. I can never take him for granted.

When my grand dad was alive,he provided all the family needs. Pay all the house bills and still do all the hard work. My dad also try his best to provide for the family but since he doesnt have a great job,mum bears the major financial burden. He still helps at home with hard jobs. Nowadays our young men sit in front of TV,do no house chores,even the hard ones but still expect their wives to bring money to the table. Modern men are simply lazy. If you will not help your wife,then dont ask for her help too. After all you will still take her for granted for rendering assistance. As for me I can spend my last kobo if my hubby needs it and he can spend his energy in house chores if i need his help. And it works for us. Shalom

Some men just don't want to do anything. A man opened a thread here sometime ago saying his wife has refused to wash his clothes after giving birth to their second child. How thoughtless can some people be? How can a man expect to do all housechores and do his laundry join? It disgusts me to no extent when men refuse to lift a finger and assist their wives under the guise that 'she's not working'. So back breaking chores is not work huh?

Our Men need to rid themselves of this mindset that housework is exclusively a woman's duty. Stop seeing your wife as a maid and treating her like you're doing her a favour. by the time she's in her 40s she'll be all worn out looking a decade older, you'll decide to jump out to chase fresh blood knowing fully well that you made her the way she is. God is watching you in super HD.

sexkillz: You're a good man bro. This is the difference between men and small boys. . .

As long as she is your wife, your marriage-mate, mother of your children, there is NOTHING too big to help her with. It's not as if she is expecting you to take over her responsibilities as a wife and mother, but common sense and human empathy and love should prevail over a woman you call wife and you should help her out often. . . A wife is not a maid.

If she is happy, you are happy. Now, what's too much to do for your own happiness?

Please close thread now! Enough said!!

People like OP is the reason why many marriages ll head to the rock,there is a thin line between a man's ego and his stupidity.

Which normal person ll think that washing the plate he ate with,tidying his home is demeaning.

Miner13:

well, what you are saying can't put an iota of belief in me, that you can do all this for your wife.
Easy said than done

some men do it.
Not all men are inconsiderate.
Thanks.

byvan: People like OP is the reason why many marriages ll head to the rock,there is a thin line between a man's ego and his stupidity.

Which normal person ll think that washing the plate he ate with,tidying his home is demeaning.

dont mind those girls who end up with their types, when they see responsible guys who will treat them like their better halves and not as a maid, they wont agree, they will be complaining that he's not rich, he's not social, etc.
Thank God for me sha.

greatgod2012:


dont mind those girls who end up with their types, when they see responsible guys who will treat them like their better halves and not as a maid, they wont agree, they will be complaining that he's not rich, he's not social, etc.
Thank God for me sha.

Most ladies these days ll rather die in riches than live modestly,some actually think that assholez are manly.The guys too are confused,they want working class ladies, they want a home keeper, they want a personal LovePeddler,they want a baby factory,they want a cook that can whisk out a plate of fufu and vegetable soup at the press of a button, want this!!want that!!everywhere.......

If she is helping with household finances then why cant you help with domestic work

^^^ Hardly will you see a home where both parties don't contribute to the running of the home financially. Yet some of these men see it as the woman's duty to do all the chores in addition to her own work. What manner of mentality is that?

Sijo01:


Its not you fault.

My dear, I was even surprised you replied the rude thing in the first place..

Anyone who can not ask questions without being rude is better ignored.

dominique: ^^^ Hardly will you see a home where both parties don't contribute to the running of the home financially. Yet some of these men see it as the woman's duty to do all the chores in addition to her own work. What manner of mentality is that?

The matter just tire person. How can helping YOUR own wife with house chores in YOUR home be seen as a big deal especially when you are both working your arss off to make ends meet. The first few responses from the males have been good though.. All hope isn't lost.. .

Kai! This is one area I respect my hubby. There's no chore he can't do. Sometimes he tells me 'baby,relax lemme take care of things.'. Esp when I was pregnant n after delivery, I enjoyed oo. D bros go even make amala sef n poundi too.

Pls assist her esp without her asking you to. You'll see the result in a more respectful n loving wife. Her thanks will be heartfelt n it'll spill over to how she treats u.

angiemartinez: That is the area where my hubby gets me angry, he dosnt just help with the kitchen at all. am like what will it cost u? will it make you less of a man? abeg i just try try to do my thing without bothering him

didnt you discuss this at the courtship stage when you people were still dating,didnt you study his iq to know what he will be capable of doing and not doing

dominique: Some men just don't want to do anything. A man opened a thread here sometime ago saying his wife has refused to wash his clothes after giving birth to their second child. How thoughtless can some people be? How can a man expect to do all housechores and do his laundry join? It disgusts me to no extent when men refuse to lift a finger and assist their wives under the guise that 'she's not working'. So back breaking chores is not work huh?

Our Men need to rid themselves of this mindset that housework is exclusively a woman's duty. Stop seeing your wife as a maid and treating her like you're doing her a favour. by the time she's in her 40s she'll be all worn out looking a decade older, you'll decide to jump out to chase fresh blood knowing fully well that you made her the way she is. God is watching you in super HD.

hunnn? Tel me this is not true