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I'm A Mother Of 2 Boys, And I Can't (and Won't) Support Feminism / Girls night out discussions / 11-yr-Old Girl Gets Pregnant For Five Boys (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by freecocoa(f): 10:15pm On Aug 01, 2015 |
Timbuktou:You are just really something, you poke the bee and when it stings, you blame it? Na wa for you o. I even tire before you my dear, this isn't the first time we are having this conversation so what's the point anyways, good night o jare. |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by Nobody: 10:26pm On Aug 01, 2015 |
freecocoa: Sleep well. |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by crackhaus: 10:45pm On Aug 01, 2015 |
Lol.. these two though |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by Nobody: 11:02pm On Aug 01, 2015 |
I had to quote this. This is one of the best posts ive read on NL being the head is not beans . . .especially if you intend to make a good job of it There is a lot involved and its not something I will willingly take up. At least if you dont like the responsibility you are given in a job or elswwhere you can quit You cant really quit being the head of your home You have so many people looking up to you and the responsibility is huge; from the tinyiest of things to major life changing descsions. Sometines I dont envy men . . the responsible ones I mean. I now kind of get where you guys are coming from regards your quest to ensure you are picking the best team for the job also bearing in mind that you are allowed only one choice of only one team member for the rest of your life. No changes allowed mid project It sounds rather clinical, but I do understand your reasons better for needing to do this. The task at hand is a serious one. However even with the best laid plans, people do change, life throws curve balls and things can go off course, hence the need not just to rely one ones stength wisdom and knowledge but also on God as well. Also not forgetting that the task is 2 fold; its about your happiness and her happiness too. Its probably harder to make someone else happy than to make yourself happy. . . again as the head, you have a responsibility towards the overall wellbeing (emotional, spiritual, mental etc) of your wards. Its been a great discussion, however as you guys want us out, I will respect that. netotse: 1 Like |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by pickabeau1: 11:11pm On Aug 01, 2015 |
An0nimus: I love the trilogy...... The third one was awesome too.... Tina Turner with a lovely song too We don't need another hero Never knew she sang it for d film Sabotage.... Batshït crazy That girl was crazy....sniping people's brains fie her money And Terrence Howard shagging another man's wife n saying its not personal.. Hahaha |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by Kimoni: 12:56am On Aug 02, 2015 |
netotse: Tearoses beat me to it but this is a very logical and straightforward post. Makes soo much sense overall. A few comments - 1. I also can't concentrate for long, my attention span is very short. Glad I found a brother. To avoid drifting, I'll number my paragraphs to guide my thought process. Note also that my response is not just me responding to you, it's me thinking aloud... 2. The best part of ur write up is the emphasis on the responsibility of the head and not the title. I see that a lot of guys get carried away with the title but in all honestly, if men were to focus on the responsibility attached to 'headship" rather than the title, there would be less marital issues (my opinion). I say this because you would be so engrossed in how to move your ministry forward that you would have little or no time for side distractions and unwarranted ego trips. 3. It's okay for guys to sit together to discuss how to choose the best mates for their teams, very rational behaviour but remember it's not a one way thing. Your main partner is going to be leaving the comfort of her family to start from the scratch with you, she is going to abandon her beloved father's name to take up yours, both of you are going to be rearing children together but those kids will take only ur name and none of hers ...I can go on forever on the sacrifices ur team mate will be making just to make a success of this journey you are inviting her on. So my point is, during your permutation and combination on how to get the best mate, remember it's not all about you, it's not just about she fitting into your life, it's about both of you fitting into each other's lives. 4. Lastly, I am not sure if love is one of the least factors that should be considered like you guys say. For me, I'll say it's actually the most important. A lot happens in marriage that you would only overlook simply because you love the person. At that stage, factors like age, beauty, wealth and other materialistic factors becomes irrelevant. Only love counts!!! You can say I think like this cuz I'm female but I refuse to believe that love affects only the female species. You can tick all my box, but if I don't love you, then it's not going to happen. And yes, I am talking from experience. In my dating days, I had guys who had everything I wanted in a man, infact, over possessed the qualities I wanted but it just didnt click and I had to let go after friendzoning for a while. I consider it a lifetime of torture living your whole life with someone you have no feelings for. Everything the person does would surely irritate me. Again, you can say I am being unduly emotional cuz I am a female but I still refuse to believe that men don't do the unbelievable for love. I read yesterday of the wedding between the richest black man in the US, a portfolio investor I think, getting married to a playboy model where is the logical correlation?? I have seen more enough to be convinced otherwise. In choosing a partner, I'll say follow your heart, but take your brain with you. 2 Likes |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by Nobody: 4:09am On Aug 02, 2015 |
Kimoni. Awesome post...I showed it to my brother and he said good points. I love you... |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by tollu: 5:19am On Aug 02, 2015 |
This here is just a pictorial representation of the bottom line of Kimoni's post. Like you and Netotse, attention span for debates... ... Odikwa very short. From where I'm standing, men that take such hard and clinical approaches to choosing a mate must have been emotionally battered in the past by one aunty and love. I pray for forgiveness for that wicked geh and healing for the hurt man. I borrow ApexTitan's acronym and say NAWALT I have been enjoying this thread thoroughly for some weeks now but things got interestingly skewed for me this past couple of days. I'm not complaining sha since I'm not a "boys" a la "Boy's discussion thread". P.S. FOLLOW YOUR HEART BUT TAKE YOUR BRAIN WITH YOU. That really is all for both sides of the fence. P.P.S Congratulations on your graduation Keppyy 3 Likes
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Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by Nobody: 5:55am On Aug 02, 2015 |
tollu: Thank you... Yes, I too should respect the thread... Goodbye boys. I'm out |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by Nobody: 9:05am On Aug 02, 2015 |
Title Vs Responsibility: I find it disingenuous that people demand that a man take full headship responsibility but condemn his identification as head. The title of head of home is hardly ceremonial and when a man has proven to be a worthy leader, he has earned the right to be treated as such. Even if he hasn't earned it, he is still at liberty to identify as head of home . That is the nature of the traditional home. Of course, he is at liberty to relinquish his powers and authority but that's wrong, even though that's the trend today. I doubt there are husbands who spend their days chanting "I am the head. I am the head" all around the house. More than likely, such conversations only come up when authority is challenged or headship is being "dragged"(thanks TV); a symptom of modern orientation and the current femcentric worldview. When both parties understand their roles there will be no need for such reminders to arise. 3 Likes |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by damiso(f): 9:33am On Aug 02, 2015 |
B netotse: So we don't get accused of trespassing again and also because I don't have energy for typing , I agree with most of your post. my stance was more against the thought of the perfect mould it or fit is within the 'a particular age range' . I agree TV01 did say he was not being prescriptive. Kimoni ,tearoses and tollu have also made valid points. Don't worry we will stop encroaching on your 'zone' |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by netotse(m): 4:06pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
Kimoni:Thanks for the tip on numbering paragraphs...will try to do that mentally. You're right, marriage is about fitting into each others lives. That said, there are some things that only men can teach each other and that's the reason for this thread an example is a post somewhere on this thread where TV broke down the difference between what you need to get a girl and what you need to keep a girl, that post opened my eyes to stuff I had previously misunderstood. I've heard it said that women cannot raise a man, much the same way a man cannot raise a woman. On the issue of love, it differs, each man will have a different ranking but you're right love is extremely important, it makes things a lot easier when your wife is the person that toggles your mumu switch. On the issue of the playboy-portfolio thing, different strokes for different folks maybe he's trying to compensate for something. |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by edwife(f): 5:22pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
netotse: Timbuktou: Agreed 100%. In the household in which i was raised, my dad was the head of the family.He didn't wear a badge nor was he authoritative,he was simply the man of the house.My dad is a very quiet man but he just has this charisma,i can't explain it. I believe in headship not because i am an inferior gender but because i understand my role as a woman,a wife and a mother. To tell you the truth,it's only on NL that i got to learn that it was an issue for some-it has never been an issue for me because i was raised around it. 1 Like |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by pickabeau1: 6:32pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
Haha Just watching an awesome comedy The Last Man on Earth Anyone seen it? |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by netotse(m): 6:52pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
damiso: lol...y'all are welcome anytime...as observers though |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by An0nimus: 6:58pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
pickabeau1:So far, the 'Arnold Schwarzennegar reboot' movies aren't so bad. Meanwhile, the guys on the gunner thread would be looking to skin you as we beat Chelsea to the shield. Funny Mourinho had to throw his medal away Arsenal signing Cech is a BIG plus. 1 Like |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by Kimoni: 6:59pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
keppyy: Thanks Keppy. Love you too... |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by Nobody: 6:59pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
See mention oh! @ Netotse, I agree largely with your post especially the part about responsibility. Reminds me of a time when I used to be jealous of my boss and how his salary must be multiples of mine. One time I had his delegation for week, come and see me begging God to bring the nucca back by the third day, I thought I was going to die from the snow of emails and never mind the number of meetings I had to attend. Mehn, was very happy to return to minion state when nucca came back o. As for the rest of the discussion, I guess I am that naive (covers face), I was raised by people who did not believe in stereotypes and that largely has always informed my disposition towards men, women and anumals as my son often writes. I nor get the 'pawa' . |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by An0nimus: 7:03pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
@netotse the ladies will be back. The thread has been through this phase before |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by netotse(m): 7:08pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
An0nimus: only if we let them... . There's nothing wrong with them posting here, as long as it's in line with the purpose of this thread. It's up to us to keep this place sane. 1 Like |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by netotse(m): 7:13pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
tollu: Hey long time, not necessarily battered, emotionally under developed is also a possibility. @Keppyy You seem like good people, you should stick around...what fun is a boys room it there are no girls to discriminate against? |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by Nobody: 7:17pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
netotse: Phew!!! Thanks for inviting me back... I was so boreed, I began hating you.. I'll be nice... I even changed my Gender... 1 Like |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by pickabeau1: 7:20pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
An0nimus: Which other Arnold movie do we have I know of expendables 3 and sabotage Let them skin It's good to retain the shield but you need perspective..its not a major title... Cech was an awesome move Arsenal has not had a keeper since Lehrman |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by Nobody: 7:23pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
pickabeau1: At least we agree on something... CHELSEA forever ... Sai Mourinho!!! |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by pickabeau1: 7:25pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
keppyy: Erm..what do we agree on It was good to see Mou stewing like a kid derived of his toys hahahahha |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by Nobody: 7:28pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
pickabeau1: Are you an Arsss lover I'm conmfused niiiii.. |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by pickabeau1: 7:31pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
keppyy: Haha..now I get 1 Like
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Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by An0nimus: 7:35pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
netotse:aye aye captain pickabeau1:The Last Stand Let them skinWe need a striker and DM. It'll be a miracle if Walcott turns to a super 9 |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by pickabeau1: 7:40pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
An0nimus: Seen it..some drug stuff...a sheriff..its ok What you think you need and what Arsene thinks you need are parallel lines |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by An0nimus: 7:40pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
pickabeau1: any image for this? it'll be good use it to taunt Chelsea fans(like keppyy ) from time to time.. |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by An0nimus: 7:44pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
pickabeau1:He should sign Benzema jare |
Re: Boys Night Out Discussions by Nobody: 7:48pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
pickabeau1: Okay..I read the post upside down |
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