I created this thread the day nairaland crashed. Didn't get much inputs before that happened. Now I'm recreating the thread again to get your honest opinions. Thanks in anticipation.
I've been dating this great lady for some time now and we love each other dearly. We intend to take it to the next level but there is this snag. She is born-again but I really don't care about religion. Don't get me wrong,i know the difference between right and wrong, and to the best of my ability,i do try hard to do what I consider right.
We both know that once I approach her parents, one of the questions they will ask will be "are you born-again?". My answer will be a simple " no". She knows this and has been trying hard to get me to say yes but I don't see myself doing that. She says if I love her as i claim,i should answer the question in the affirmative but what would that make me? I know there is more than 80% chance of not receiving her parents' blessings if I say the truth and I really don't want to lose her.
Right now, my answer still remains "no". Now my dear friends, what do you think? Do I lie or stand by what I believe in?(I'll rather do the latter).

Op, I wouldn't advice you to go into something as serious as marriage on a framework of lies. What if you say yes, and when finally you both get married, you don't live the lifestyle of the born again you claimed to be? Her family will know you lied to them and that is the beginning of unnecessary drama that is very unhealthy for the peace and well being of your marriage.

My advice to you is stand your ground and for God's sakes do not lie. Let your yea be your yea and your nay be your nay. It will save you a whole lot headache later on. If they don't accept it, well then, so be it. It is better to go into the marriage with a clear conscience than start something you are not sure of finishing. And your born-again girlfriend should know that lying is the same thing as committing murder. She needs to re-examine her faith and beliefs.

Ishilove: Op, I wouldn't advice you to go into something as serious as marriage on a framework of lies. What if you say yes, and when finally you both get married, you don't live the lifestyle of the born again you claimed to be? Her family will know you lied to them and that is the beginning of unnecessary drama that is very unhealthy for the peace and well being of your marriage.

My advice to you is stand your ground and for God's sakes do not lie. Let your yea be your yea and your nay be your nay. It will save you a whole lot headache later on. If they don't accept it, well then, so be it. It is better to go into the marriage with a clear conscience than start something you are not sure of finishing. And your born-again girlfriend should know that lying is the same thing as committing murder. She needs to re-examine her faith and beliefs.

You just said my mind... I mean building a marriage based on a lie? It doesn't seem very smart to me.. Thanks a lot.

pleas advice https://www.nairaland.com/1790903/see-bad-girl-o tank u

adahib: I created this thread the day nairaland crashed. Didn't get much inputs before that happened. Now I'm recreating the thread again to get your honest opinions. Thanks in anticipation.
I've been dating this great lady for some time now and we love each other dearly. We intend to take it to the next level but there is this snag. She is born-again but I really don't care about religion. Don't get me wrong,i know the difference between right and wrong, and to the best of my ability,i do try hard to do what I consider right.
We both know that once I approach her parents, one of the questions they will ask will be "are you born-again?". My answer will be a simple " no". She knows this and has been trying hard to get me to say yes but I don't see myself doing that. She says if I love her as i claim,i should answer the question in the affirmative but what would that make me? I know there is more than 80% chance of not receiving her parents' blessings if I say the truth and I really don't want to lose her.
Right now, my answer still remains "no". Now my dear friends, what do you think? Do I lie or stand by what I believe in?(I'll rather do the latter).

don't lie

adahib:

You just said my mind... I mean building a marriage based on a lie? It doesn't seem very smart to me.. Thanks a lot.

Not only is it not smart, it is also not the right thing to do. Wish you the best.

Ishilove:
Not only is it not smart, it is also not the right thing to do. Wish you the best.

Thanks ma'am

ERTHAENIGMA:
don't lie

Okay....

Don't lie,tell them you aren't,but not ruling out the possibility of been one...religion can be a sensitive issue in marriage.

Yomieluv: Don't lie,tell them you aren't,but not ruling out the possibility of been one...religion can be a sensitive issue in marriage.

Makes sense.....thanks

Come on guys.... Kindly help a brother out please.

If you stand by what you believe is right and answer "no" when her folks eventually ask you, hope you wont feel bad when you eventually lose her as a result of your response to the question?. #justthinkingoutloud



Is not a good sign to start a marriage when both parties are not in agreement. Their must be compromise if you want your future with her to thrive. The question is, who is ready to sacrifice and compromise?







BROS YOU SEF WHY YOU NO BELIEVE IN GOD NA? ;DU DEY MISS O

2goodbobo: If you stand by what you believe is right and answer "no" when her folks eventually ask you, hope you wont feel bad when you eventually lose her as a result of your response to the question?. #justthinkingoutloud



Is not a good sign to start a marriage when both parties are not in agreement. Their must be compromise if you want your future with her to thrive. The question is, who is ready to sacrifice and compromise?








BROS YOU SEF WHY YOU NO BELIEVE IN GOD NA? ;DU DEY MISS O

Hahahaha....you are correct bro but we all can't share the same believes na

Be born again...... what do you really have to lose?

dazz661: Be born again...... what do you really have to lose?

Thanks for the advice but that's not the issue here.

adahib: I created this thread the day nairaland crashed. Didn't get much inputs before that happened. Now I'm recreating the thread again to get your honest opinions. Thanks in anticipation.
I've been dating this great lady for some time now and we love each other dearly. We intend to take it to the next level but there is this snag. She is born-again but I really don't care about religion. Don't get me wrong,i know the difference between right and wrong, and to the best of my ability,i do try hard to do what I consider right.
We both know that once I approach her parents, one of the questions they will ask will be "are you born-again?". My answer will be a simple " no". She knows this and has been trying hard to get me to say yes but I don't see myself doing that. She says if I love her as i claim,i should answer the question in the affirmative but what would that make me? I know there is more than 80% chance of not receiving her parents' blessings if I say the truth and I really don't want to lose her.
Right now, my answer still remains "no". Now my dear friends, what do you think? Do I lie or stand by what I believe in?(I'll rather do the latter).

bros, na thunder by fire she go dey do for night ooo.she no go ever let u sleep when she dey cast and bind all those mammy water dem and spirit husbands for night.shey u go fit bear dat one?

adahib:

Thanks for the advice but that's not the issue here.

How far? Have you resolved your issues with your woman?

Just say the truth an let ur mind, soul and spirit be at rest with you

Before I say my piece, I wanna ask you a question. What is your religion? You didn't say if you're christian or Muslim or even an atheist.

lefulefu:
bros, na thunder by fire she go dey do for night ooo.she no go ever let u sleep when she dey cast and bind all those mammy water dem and spirit husbands for night.shey u go fit bear dat one?

Bros I don reason this side of the matter oo. We get understanding for that one. Hahaha

Ishilove:
How far? Have you resolved your issues with your woman?

Not yet, we are still on the matter. I've told her where I stand. She is unhappy with it. Still trying to convince me though.

BluePearls: Before I say my piece, I wanna ask you a question. What is your religion? You didn't say if you're christian or Muslim or even an atheist.

I'm an agnostic. You can now contribute. Thanks

bro i like your point


my own babe na church going born again

and im a home dwelling born again...

i honestly dont see the big deal in church attendance

im also not ready to change my belief that the church of God is beyond brick and mortar business centers we have these days

in fact i wont budge...

shes very religious...im very industrious

bro i like your point


my own babe na church going born again

and im a home dwelling born again...

i honestly dont see the big deal in church attendance

im also not ready to change my belief that the church of God is beyond brick and mortar business centers we have these days

in fact i wont budge...

shes very religious...im very industrious

i think its like one commenter earlier said...better to hold on to what you are and what u will not forsake than worry about keeping up appearances one is not even in a position to sustain.

Do anyting for ur gal,,,if she wants you to steal, plss do cos she's your one and only

@Op in every relationship there must be compromise, so standing your ground all the time is plain foolishness (no offence taken). If you love someone as you rightly said you should be ready to shift ground sometimes, these guys who tell you don't lie are they even married to tell you anything. Aren't you even giving your future a thought whether your kids will be born confused (just like you) on what religion to take. #beguided

peterjero: @Op in every relationship there must be compromise, so standing your ground all the time is plain foolishness (no offence taken). If you love someone as you rightly said you should be ready to shift ground sometimes, these guys who tell you don't lie are they even married to tell you anything. Aren't you even giving your future a thought whether your kids will be born confused (just like you) on what religion to take. #beguided

I was tempted to respond to your post in like manner (with insults) but I then asked myself how would people differentiate the two of us if I did. So I'll rather take the advice and leave the rest. Thanks

hadizadeezy: Do anyting for ur gal,,,if she wants you to steal, plss do cos she's your one and only

Hahahaha... Thanks my sister but I really can't steal for anybody. That doesn't mean I won't do my utmost for her..

Their daughter is not born again so why wil they ask.

Ask her to pray for you to come in contact with the Holy spirit so you can become born again as well. With God all things are possible.


But God will help US. We the so called born again who are meant to draw people closer to God are making them drift away because of our selfish interests.

sholasholala: Ask her to pray for you to come in contact with the Holy spirit so you can become born again as well. With God all things are possible.


But God will help US. We the so called born again who are meant to draw people closer to God are making them drift away because of our selfish interests.

Me sef tire oo.. I think I need serious prayers oo. Not sure it'll work though..hehehehe

So if you will not be born again, her parents will not give their blessings what next?