A discussion happened during a seminar on marriage and they was no conclusive answer to the question posited as a result of time constraint.

As a man if you discover that your wife purchased a land without your notice and went ahead to build on it till completion without telling u...what will be your reaction....

As a lady can u build a house without informing ur spouse

Taiwo hassan *ogogo* was the husband and this lady, can't rem her name
She took her frnds advice
I didn't finish watchin that movie sef

As the husband, i will collect the house keys, original documents and sell the house.

Collect the original doc, Do change of ownership asap

ChrisChino: As the husband, i will collect the house keys, original documents and sell the house.

akraym: Collect the original doc, Do change of ownership asap

And you both think a woman that built a house behind your back would foolishly hand over the documents to you?keep dreaming. If a lady builds a house without you knowing then know that 1)you have been giving her reasons not to trust you with such information 2)the wife does not care what your opinion is.

If the guy is the lazy type, then he deserves it, who knows, he might have squandered her money and she would have never moulded a single block her whole life.

That's an insult to the man. Different people would react differently, I would likely ignore her, as long as I have a roof over my head, that is her business.

ChrisChino: As the husband, i will collect the house keys, original documents and sell the house.

Most women will rather have you dead than watch you do this.

No I cannot, if for any reason I feel I cannot trust my spouse with such information I did be long estranged from him.



See how some of them are claiming I ll collect and do bla bla bla, most men have no idea... .

ChrisChino: As the husband, i will collect the house keys, original documents and sell the house.

akraym: Collect the original doc, Do change of ownership asap

On what grounds?

You guys assume the woman would just meekly let you go ahead and implement your fantasy talk?

People keep secrets in marriage when they know the other party will not support their dreams and ambition. Probably the wife knows if her husband knows she wants to build a house, husband might collect and sqaunder the money. It goes both ways shaa

bennyrazz: People keep secrets in marriage when they know the other party will not support their dreams and ambition. Probably the wife knows if her husband knows she wants to build a house, husband might collect and sqaunder the money. It goes both ways shaa

Lol!

And the thought of a married woman building a house in her own name actually brings tears so some "men's" eyes, you know.

EfemenaXY:

Lol!

And the thought of a married woman building a house in her own name actually brings tears so some "men's" eyes, you know.

it does not bring tears, it brings pain. A woman that does that as surely bruised the man's ego and they might be war. But let's face it, women keep secrets more than men and they sure know how to keep their secrets SECRETS. I describe such women as green snakes that are very poisonous and should they sting you with their bite it would be bad so really its not advisable for women to be too too secretive if you want marriage to last. You might keep secret of buying the land but when it gets to building the house, let him know

bennyrazz: it does not bring tears, it brings pain. A woman that does that as surely bruised the man's ego and they might be war. But let's face it, women keep secrets more than men and they sure know how to keep their secrets SECRETS. I describe such women as green snakes that are very poisonous and should they sting you with their bite it would be bad so really its not advisable for women to be too too secretive if you want marriage to last. You might keep secret of buying the land but when it gets to building the house, let him know

Well then, if men could only just realise how much of a green snake women are, then it would do them good not to invite their venom, much less their bites, don't you think?

The bolded bit of your advice is wrong. Be honest from the start. No partiality or half measures. If you're going to be secretive then do so (at your own risk) to the end.

EfemenaXY:



Well then, if men could only just realise how much of a green snake women are, then it would do them good not to invite their venom, much less their bites, don't you think?

The bolded bit of your advice is wrong. Be honest from the start. No partiality or half measures. If you're going to be secretive then do so (at your own risk) to the end.

not all women are green snakes some are very gentle, after God it is their husband. My advice is not a general one per se, some men can be very irresponsible when it comes to investing and saving moneyvwhile some are financially reckless. They will be like, bring the money and let us spend it all while some women are, let us save some money get a property somewhere and husband as a hard heart, the best thing to do is to commit him. Buy the land in both of you names (mr and Mrs). All what some men need is just a little push when it comes to investments and just wait and see them go all the way, but if you know your husband does not need a push then you can sit down and plan it from the onset.

I would feel bad because such project takes time to plan thus, she decided to keep it away from me. I will surely move on as though it never happened in a couple of days. I have learnt not to bother about such in life anymore nonetheless, I don't think I can trust her words anymore as such, it might have a strain on our marriage.

bennyrazz: not all women are green snakes some are very gentle, after God it is their husband. My advice is not a general one per se, some men can be very irresponsible when it comes to investing and saving moneyvwhile some are financially reckless. They will be like, bring the money and let us spend it all while some women are, let us save some money get a property somewhere and husband as a hard heart, the best thing to do is to commit him. Buy the land in both of you names (mr and Mrs). All what some men need is just a little push when it comes to investments and just wait and see them go all the way, but if you know your husband does not need a push then you can sit down and plan it from the onset.

Only a boy playing the adult game called marriage would do that.

Anyway, before a woman makes the step to go the extra mile of buying and securing land in her name, then building on it, she really must have studied the man she's married to, and is simply casting out her safety net. Moreso if effective, adult, communication is an issue between them.

EfemenaXY:

Only a boy playing the adult game called marriage would do that.

Anyway, before a woman makes the step to go the extra mile of buying and securing land in her name, then building on it, she really must have studied the man she's married to, and is simply casting out her safety net. . Moreso if effective, adult, communication is an issue between them.

yea especially if the man is busy nursing his polygamy agenda via having concubines and baby mamas

bennyrazz: yea especially if the man is busy nursing his polygamy agenda via having concubines and baby mamas

Lol!

Then it makes perfect sense for her to lookout for her's and her children's futures. In such a scenario (polygamous setting), it's every woman and her kids!

beau49: And you both think a woman that built a house behind your back would foolishly hand over the documents to you?keep dreaming. If a lady builds a house without you knowing then know that 1)you have been giving her reasons not to trust you with such information 2)the wife does not care what your opinion is.

Why must you say the wife does not trust the huaband. What if she is a wayward wife or the greedy one or a feminist. I beg

EfemenaXY:

Lol!

Then it makes perfect sense for her to lookout for her's and her children's futures. In such a scenario (polygamous setting), it's every woman and her kids!

yea it makes perfect sense a man doesn't become polygamous overnight, you don't wait for him to be polygamous before you take steps to secure the future of your children, there are signs and once a woman start noticing those signs, she should secure her future.

Witty07:
Why must you say the wife does not trust the huaband. What if she is a wayward wife or the greedy one or a feminist. I beg

That's why I gave two instances, what you mentioned falls into the second one.

If your wife does that,check yourself well.
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