I need your help. And please read on and forgive my disjointed nature of summarizing my thoughts

I got interested in computers, it really fascinated me as a child. It became more of an obsession and unfortunately my phobia for maths landed me in the Arts. Jamb + no Jamb led to the Economics, and there Maths became an ally. I hated Economics but that's where I found myself. Maths and Psychology and eventually Programming gave me the comfort need to go through the four years in school.

This period gave me the opportunity to learn, explore technology. From Linux to Programming Languages to Networking, Security , Databases etc. Just never did well at Graphics. This was a sweet period. Learning those stuff paid off. IT helped me become stronger

Upon graduation all I wanted to do was just move on quickly away from Economics, get proper training in Software Development & Architecture. I just really wanted to improve my game. Finally get to study what I've always loved and was extremely passionate about.

I got in touch with Universities abroad and most turned me down due to my "non-scientific" background. Eventually got offered an accelerated Bsc program from a school in North America. Was working outside Lagos then and had to come down a couple of times to process stuff. Eventually visa came through.

Now time for payment came and sponsor backed out on their promise of over 6 years at the last minute. This was soul shattering for me. I ran into a fatal exception. My entire life came crumbling. Had to quit my job, lost a loved one and now this. This wasn't the end of this issue. This issue snowballed no one took responsibility.

Eventually had to try and recover from the whole drama. Life became dull,depression set in and I got a job as a systems integrator. I didn't get to program at my new job, was just deploying apps. Had to deal with lots of issues at clients site. Eventually someone spotted me testing a mobile app on my phone. A conversation ensued and I got poached.

Got a development offer at a new company that was growing at a fast pace. Emphasis was placed on getting things done, this environment was perfect. Did my work well, buried myself in it just to fight off the disappointments and losses. Things changed on the outside but deep down I know there's an unfinished matter.

I got the opportunity to build, learn , relearn, apply and get results.

Now we are growing, more responsibilities are coming my way, more than ever I need to[b] improve [/b]. I need to grow. Beyond coding ad development. I need to become more of an architect. I really desire to have a deep understanding of this subject matter. Not necessarily on a theoretical level, but on a level that facilitates knowledge transfer and application into real world problems and scenarios. I wish to explore things like AI, ML etc would just love to satisfy this curiosity and be immersed.

Most people would say most of these stuff you can learn on your own from books or online videos, have tried that route. I need something more concentrated and traditional.

What can I do ?


Thanks

Shaking my head