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Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by rebella(f): 11:17pm On Aug 22, 2014
Dygeasy: By being interested you mean you explicitly expressed your interest or you were just give cues or clues passively for him to act on?

I doubt it's the former so you, my dear weren't friendzoned. There just was once upon a time, an unobservant n*gga lived.
lol @ unobservant, anyway the crux of the matter still remains, when you are friendzoned take a long walk

1 Like

Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by daveP(m): 11:19pm On Aug 22, 2014
Hmm, this issue would never rest still. Dygeasy come finish that tori o!
Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by Nobody: 9:16pm On Nov 23, 2014
Where do people get this information from? Every body seems to be living by the same rules.
Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by veave(f): 10:04pm On Nov 23, 2014
What has this long epistle got to do with the fact than i am crushing on the op undecided tongue
Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by Nobody: 10:57pm On Nov 23, 2014
cheesy
veave:
What has this long epistle got to do with the fact than i am crushing on the op undecided tongue
Do we have a friend zoning situation here veave?
Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by Truckpusher(m): 5:09am On Nov 24, 2014
What is friendzoning ? because, here in the Atlantic ocean we don't know about this. angry

4 Likes

Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by Nobody: 5:10am On Nov 24, 2014
Sophyrocks:


I completely agree with you on the bolded. As for guys who complain about been friendzoned, Simply get out of that zone and move on with your life. If you open up your feelings and let a lady know how you feel about her on time then make the decision to move on if her answer is negative, You won't be friendzoned!! Tell yourself the truth and move on. LOTS OF LADIES OUT THERE TO CHOOSE FROM!

Although most nice guys are friendzoned but its pure fallacy to believe that all friendzoned guys are Nice guys. Anybody can be friendzoned.

one girl almost friend zoned me,she message when she got problems or when she Hot, but you know what, a stranger alway end up satisfying her. man i just erased her memory outta my head. although na smash i wan smash sha, but still i ran

anyways na mars i dey sha. how earth

4 Likes

Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by niggi4life(m): 5:33am On Nov 24, 2014
PLEASE HELP ME, I HAVE BEEN FRIENDZONED BY MY WIFE OOOOO cry

11 Likes

Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by AmINotHuman(m): 5:35am On Nov 24, 2014
Well, for all the "nice guys" out there, no one owes you a relationship. A woman is not obligated to date you because you managed to fulfil the basic requirement of being a "nice guy". The real question is, what else can you bring to the table? As shallow as this sounds, are you good-looking? Rich? Smart? Talented? Funny? Any thing more than just being a "nice guy"?

Being a a nice guy is nothing but the bare minimum. Saying "if I were your boyfriend, I won't treat you like that". It's not always about what you won't or don't do ("At least I'm not like the other guys", "At least I won't break her heart" ... and several other reasons while you're not a bad person).

What can you contribute to her life? Women invest too much into themselves (appearance-wise and so on) to meet a certain standard and you have to meet up with that standard, being a "nice guy" just isn't enough.

All in all, you can't force someone to fall for you. If a woman isn't romantically interested in you, there's no need to force it or pressure her or guilt trip her into dating you. It'll only make you her doormat.

I recommend this article for those who want to face the harsh realities of life: http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harsh-truths-that-will-make-you-better-person/

3 Likes

Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by symbian03(m): 5:36am On Nov 24, 2014
But honestly, what's bad in having female friends without the so called benefits? sex is just overrated cry . I've got so many female friends and I do stuffs for them without expecting anything in return like I would for any male counterpart. Am I being a fool here? definitely not! So if I've got 50 female friends, would going intimate with all of them give me that 'smart guy' title most guys wants? undecided

8 Likes

Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by Nobody: 5:41am On Nov 24, 2014
Friend zone is the most dreaded zone for me. It's just selfishness of the highest order. Girls can be so selfish chaii! undecided
Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by onadana: 5:46am On Nov 24, 2014
When you go into a relationship...be prepared to receive all the package,competition,heartache's,betrayal(sometimes),love etcLove is beautiful if you know how to play.Love is sweet money makes it sweeter.It irks me when guys feel bad that they spend and spend and yet she dumps them...didn't you lay her?Can she take that back?As long as you folks have not tied the nuptial knot no body has a hold over anybody.Get it. cool
Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by symbian03(m): 5:47am On Nov 24, 2014
Amefrica:
Friend zone is the most dreaded zone for me. It's just selfishness of the highest order. Girls can be so selfish chaii! undecided

What exactly do you expect in return when you help a female friend?
Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by Konjour(m): 5:47am On Nov 24, 2014
Seems this 'zoning' stuff is a bigger deal than I thought. If you're in a 'zone', its definitely cuz you want to be there. Sticking around in such zones with futile hopes raised, to me, means that you probably deserve to be there. Nuff said.

Nice guys finish last? That belief applies to an extreme minority of 'nice guys'...at least of the ones I know.

A lot of the nice ones I know are really having some hard times selecting their pick among the plethora of 'options' they're being bombarded with everyday, basically cuz they are 'nice' and are seen as final 'bus stops', rather than connecting ones.

Indeed, there are plenty of fishes in the sea as the saying goes. If your bait is good, your hooks might be torn off the line if you're not careful enough.

I live at sea so I've seen it happen a lot. cheesy

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Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by Nobody: 5:52am On Nov 24, 2014
Nice write up...trust me this friend-zone of a thing can be wicked,a lady that happened to be my friend for more than five years was expecting more from me,the day she finally knew I was not interested in a relationship with her she felt very disappointed and heart-broken,so my advice to all we guys out there is that if a lady is having a crush and interested in you and you don't have interest then please let her know so that she will move on with her life because putting her on friend-zone might make her think there is still hope or maybe you are shy to ask her out,and by the time she finally knew that she can never be more than a friend after a long period of friend-zoning trust me she will feel like killing you,it hurts alot

3 Likes

Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by tintingz(m): 6:06am On Nov 24, 2014
When a guy is nice some girls use them, take advantage of his nice nature and dump or friend-zone them, only girls that knows the value of being nice keep them and love them. smiley
Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by passionate88: 6:07am On Nov 24, 2014
Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by jauntty: 6:13am On Nov 24, 2014
If u are "friendzoned" then its ur fault. I always define all my relationships with females. If I want a relationship and u saying 'friendship' I take a walk. Simple! Ironically guys also friendzone gals, so its not just gals who r guilty. Infact, some guys will not only friendzone a girl but also " sexzone" her. Love is a function of ur location and chance, so why imprison urself. I had this Cutie I liked back then in Univ. We became close, but wen I start reading her the love epistles, she was like ' she likes me but wanted us to be friends', I zoomed off. Few weeks later I hooked up wit another Cutie, that was wen she started getting jealous and becoming interested. Too late. #no_dulling

3 Likes

Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by seedord247(m): 6:14am On Nov 24, 2014
Beeeches be like grin

1 Share

Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by madjune(m): 6:20am On Nov 24, 2014
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Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by Nobody: 6:21am On Nov 24, 2014
How do you guys type lengthy words without getting tired??

4 Likes

Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by BigBen10: 6:22am On Nov 24, 2014
Op you make sense joor especially as regards the nice guys arguments. I am one of such nice guys. I have different experience with ladies but never let them take away my diginity or get friendzoned.

There was this girl which I wanted to ask out about a year ago. We started well and we were making headway but I guess I was too dull for her. I invited her one evening with hints of my intention. She refused to come stood me up from 7-10pm. When I Called her she kept saying she's coming and eventually that she is watching film and too lazy to come.
I swallowed the bitter pill and let it go. I tried maintaining contact but nothing changed.

Now a year after reevaluating(the guy she liked then didn't like her back). she starts texting me that "I did not even say anything again". I laugh. I guess her fast and furious guys has dulled her. she Now hugs me whenever she sees me. issokay.

I made several attempts at getting close to other ladies but they were not forthcoming. But suddenly a good number of them are starting to rethink me . Its now my trurn to pick and choose who is too "hyper" for me.

so the nice guys out there just chill take your time don't bend your moral nature. Yes you may not have the so called beautiful babes but there is that one beautiful girl who fancies you and your "dullness".

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by Nobody: 6:26am On Nov 24, 2014
symbian03:


What exactly do you expect in return when you help a female friend?

Friendship is mutual, rub my back while I rub yours. Not some parasitic girls, that would extremely feed on you and wouldn't want to do anything or give something up for friendship's sake.

2 Likes

Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by Votukpa(m): 6:27am On Nov 24, 2014
AmINotHuman:
Well, for all the "nice guys" out there, no one owes you a relationship. A woman is not obligated to date you because you managed to fulfil the basic requirement of being a "nice guy". The real question is, what else can you bring to the table? As shallow as this sounds, are you good-looking? Rich? Smart? Talented? Funny? Any thing more than just being a "nice guy"?

Being a a nice guy is nothing but the bare minimum. Saying "if I were your boyfriend, I won't treat you like that". It's not always about what you won't or don't do ("At least I'm not like the other guys", "At least I won't break her heart" ... and several other reasons while you're not a bad person).

What can you contribute to her life? Women invest too much into themselves (appearance-wise and so on) to meet a certain standard and you have to meet up with that standard, being a "nice guy" just isn't enough.

All in all, you can't force someone to fall for you. If a woman isn't romantically interested in you, there's no need to force it or pressure her or guilt trip her into dating you. It'll only make you her doormat.

I recommend this article for those who want to face the harsh realities of life: http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harsh-truths-that-will-make-you-better-person/

Did any one read this?
Have a read and save urselves from the friend zone enigma.
Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by jauntty: 6:32am On Nov 24, 2014
wakacome:
so my advice to all we guys out there is that if a lady is having a crush and interested in you and you don't have interest then please let her know so that she will move on with her life
Totally agree with u. Even tho its hard to tell a girl who is crushing on u that without making her feel bad its still d best thing to do. Had this girl close to my work place who is my friend. After a while her calls and chats became 'emotional funny' and she was becoming jealous if I joke around with her female colleagues n stuffs like dat. One day I told her I needed her advice : that I have this gal who I like as a friend but can't date. (She knew I was talking abt her). She feel bad tho but we remained gud friends. (I even encourage her to accept the guy she is dating now).
Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by Nobody: 6:34am On Nov 24, 2014
rebella:
Nice one ihedinobi2, I especially agree with you on the nice guys finish last. Friendzoning at time can be a bit complex, in my experience, most times the "zoned" put themselves in the zone, they know they already have feelings for the zoner and then decided to start off first and friends, probably to get to know the "zoner" better. Then from there they enter the friendzone, because the "zoner" doesn't see them as anything more than friends. I actually find it annoying when people complain about being friendzoned, nobody is forcing you to stay, take a walk!! if someone doesn't appreciate your love look for someone who will appreciate you, quirks and all.
At times, its not like the Zoner doesn't realise that the zoned is a great person, its just that the zoner can't help but feel nothing, in this case the zoner should let the zoned walk or cut off contact instead of leading them on.




Exactly! When people talk of being friend zoned, i only blame the zoned. We are all humans, and we enjoy being loved and cared for so i won't blame the zoner. If a girl says she doesn't love me "that way" , that's it! I'm out, i wont waste my time. Personally i don't believe in wooing a girl and making her fall in love, I'd never ask a girl out . I simply tell her how i feel. If the feeling is mutual, a great relationship can start, if not i wont try to persuade, i just walk away and deal with my own feelings. No need trying to convince her

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Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by Opiosko: 6:35am On Nov 24, 2014
MizMyColi:
Well, true, that.
If he's the pestering kind who just won't understand no matter how I try to make him see, I employ maximum avoidance, to a fault.
I won't even accept any gifting or make him feel comfortable around me.

There are people too, that we meet, who you bond with and at the same time you just know, this one's filial.
I have one in particular who does exactly what you've described below.
He tries to steer clear because he knows it won't happen, yet He loves me deeply.

Now whether he agrees or not, there are those times when we all need someone to show us that they care.
That's what I try to do despite his feelings for me or not.
I think he understands.
I also know when to cut off, like go radio silent.
It all boils down to wisdom being profitable to direct a person's path.
Adannaya u are wise...but my new wife is wiser. Truely, Wisdom is profitable to direct....
Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by Feraz(m): 6:41am On Nov 24, 2014
symbian03:
But honestly, what's bad in having female friends without the so called benefits? sex is just overrated cry . I've got so many female friends and I do stuffs for them without expecting anything in return like I would for any male counterpart. Am I being a fool here? definitely not! So if I've got 50 female friends, would going intimate with all of them give me that 'smart guy' title most guys wants? undecided
Nope! The writeup isn't talking about you gaining sex from female friends and all. Friendzone is not about you having benefits from female friends, it's about loving one out of all your female friends but she not reciprocating this love. She knows you do love her and will go any length to prove this fact but instead of letting you go, she doesn't. It hurts sometimes especially when you know your intentions are genuine. Some go the extent of scuttling your chances with others just cos they want you being around them, showing them that attention they so want.
Funny thing, when you are hooked up with someone else, she becomes jealous and start showing you all the love you once wished for.

And Ihedinobi my n*gga strikes back!!! grin Where's wackyj1 to complete this? wink

2 Likes

Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by youngvizzy1(m): 6:42am On Nov 24, 2014
I couldn't finish reading it, too long to read, who else didn't read it
Re: Closing Arguments On Friendzoning And "Nice Guys Finish Last" by sunnyflakes(m): 6:44am On Nov 24, 2014
I AM COMING BACK TO THIS GIST LEMME HAVE A HEART TO HEART WITH GOOGLE AND eBay

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