Funny African Proverbs
It is only a stupid cow that rejoices at the prospect of being taken to a beautiful abattoir – Zambian Proverb.
No matter how far an eagle flies up thesky, it will definitely come down to lookfor food – Zimbabwe Proverb
An army of sheep led by a lion can defeat an army of lions led by a sheep. – Ghanaian proverb
The man who marries a beautiful woman, and the farmer who grows corn by the roadside have the same problem- Ethiopian Proverb
A short man is not a boy- Nigerian Proverb
No matter how hot your anger is, it cannot cook yams- Nigerian Proverb
The frown on the face of the goat will not stop it from being taken to the market – Nigerian Proverb
An old lady feels uneasy when dry bones are mentioned in a proverb – Ghanaian Proverb
The same sun that melts the wax, hardens the clay – NigerienProverb
The madman, who throws a stone into a crowded market, forgets that his ownmother could be hit by his madness. – Ugandan Proverb
He who goes to sleep with an itching anus wakes up with smelly fingers – Nigerian Proverb
You can add more funny Proverbs in the comment box below to continue the fun......

Only a courageous woman can fry a bunch of
plantain without tasting any-
Albert Marcauley (1872)
.
He who says nothing last forever has never tried Hausa perfume- Nelson Mandela (1973)
.
He who completely unwrap moimoi and gala b4 eating cannot keep a secret-
Abraham Lincoln (1864)
.
Any man that uses his teeth to cut shaki from
pepper soup, with his eyes wide open, is not afraid of anything- William Shakespear (1900)
'
Anyone who graduate without expiriencing strike, has never been to Nigeria-
Lord Lugard (1904)
:
He who refuse to mix agege bread and akara as a type of sandwich is a racist-
Martin Luther King jnr (1788)
.
Any man who drinks Alomo bitters without
squeezing his face, is capable of murder- Michael Faraday (1899)
.
Drinking Garri doesn't mean u're poor, but allowing the Garri to swell b4 drinking is poverty- Queen Elizabeth (1893)
.
He who runs around looking 4 scissors to cut
indomine seasoning sachet is not hungry-
Dr Nnamdi Azikiwe (1947)
.
Anyone who read this without laughing is either looking 4 job or Needs Jesus Badly- Arch. Namadi Sambo (2014)



.



.


.



BIKE MAN: Where are you going to?

PROSTITUTE: I'm going to the mortuary.

BIKE MAN: Sorry it's late, I can't drop you there except you pay me 3000 naira.

PROSTITUTE: No problem, when we get there, you'll be paid. (When they got to the mortuary, the prostitute said,) "Wait here a second, let me go get you the money."(When the man waited for an hour without seeing the prostitute, he decided to go in search of her. He pushed open the gate of the mortuary a little bit, took some steps in, before noticing someone,who appeared to be the mortuary attendant, lounging around)

ATTENDANT: How can I help you sir?

BIKE MAN: I gave a lady a ride to this place, she asked me to wait for her to go inside and get the money for the ride, but didn't come back.

ATTENDANT: No one entered here! So I don't know what you are talking about.
(The bike man insisted and decided to stay and wait for the lady. The attendant thought for a
while and asked him to follow him into the mortuary room. When they got there)

ATTENDANT: (He picks up a stick beside him, and points it towards the bodies) If you know you entered a bike and didn't pay, quickly raise up your hand and bring it out or else I will beat all of you with this stick! (Quickly, one of the dead bodies raised up her hand and threw the money at the bike rider.)

If you were the bike man, what wil l you do?














A M P R O U D L Y N I G E R I A N !

checkdate: Only a courageous woman can fry a bunch of
plantain without tasting any-
Albert Marcauley (1872)
.
He who says nothing last forever has never tried Hausa perfume- Nelson Mandela (1973)
.
He who completely unwrap moimoi and gala b4 eating cannot keep a secret-
Abraham Lincoln (1864)
.
Any man that uses his teeth to cut shaki from
pepper soup, with his eyes wide open, is not afraid of anything- William Shakespear (1900)
'
Anyone who graduate without expiriencing strike, has never been to Nigeria-
Lord Lugard (1904)
:
He who refuse to mix agege bread and akara as a type of sandwich is a racist-
Martin Luther King jnr (1788)
.
Any man who drinks Alomo bitters without
squeezing his face, is capable of murder- Michael Faraday (1899)
.
Drinking Garri doesn't mean u're poor, but allowing the Garri to swell b4 drinking is poverty- Queen Elizabeth (1893)
.
He who runs around looking 4 scissors to cut
indomine seasoning sachet is not hungry-
Dr Nnamdi Azikiwe (1947)
.
Anyone who read this without laughing is either looking 4 job or Needs Jesus Badly- Arch. Namadi Sambo (2014)



.



.


.



BIKE MAN: Where are you going to?

PROSTITUTE: I'm going to the mortuary.

BIKE MAN: Sorry it's late, I can't drop you there except you pay me 3000 naira.

PROSTITUTE: No problem, when we get there, you'll be paid. (When they got to the mortuary, the prostitute said,) "Wait here a second, let me go get you the money."(When the man waited for an hour without seeing the prostitute, he decided to go in search of her. He pushed open the gate of the mortuary a little bit, took some steps in, before noticing someone,who appeared to be the mortuary attendant, lounging around)

ATTENDANT: How can I help you sir?

BIKE MAN: I gave a lady a ride to this place, she asked me to wait for her to go inside and get the money for the ride, but didn't come back.

ATTENDANT: No one entered here! So I don't know what you are talking about.
(The bike man insisted and decided to stay and wait for the lady. The attendant thought for a
while and asked him to follow him into the mortuary room. When they got there)

ATTENDANT: (He picks up a stick beside him, and points it towards the bodies) If you know you entered a bike and didn't pay, quickly raise up your hand and bring it out or else I will beat all of you with this stick! (Quickly, one of the dead bodies raised up her hand and threw the money at the bike rider.)

If you were the bike man, what wil l you do?














A M P R O U D L Y N I G E R I A N !

I go take the money and start my bike and zoom off. I render a service so I deserved to be paid