I don't really know the section to categorize this topic so I felt I should put it here since its about friendship.

A friend of mine have a room mate who lives with her. she complains to me all the time about the girl's laziness and how she can't even pick up a broom or mop to do anything. We advised her to sit the girl down and talk to her about the chores but she prefers to tolerant and keep her silence while doing the chores in order to avoid quarrel,argument or unnecessary misunderstanding since she will soon be packing out.

Now,it happened that there was this unforeseen event that occurred while they were in the kitchen concerning a utensil which she wanted to use but the girl also wanted it but later gave it to her. After cooking,she left and want to eat then the girl came and told her that the pot was actually hers.Yes,the pot is actually hers but what annoyed my friend was that the pot was left for three days in the kitchen without been washed and No,she didn't realize at first that the pot wasn't hers since the cover was actually hers.

This event resulted into insults from the girl to my friend and this caused serious quarrel that she has been trying to avoid. If only she had trashed out the issue of laziness and other problems between them, I think this problem wouldn't have come up because the girl would have washed the pot earlier and there wouldn't have been an issue.

So,I want to know because my friend believes in tolerance...is tolerance and silence the best way of handling issues?

Sometimes, tolerance does not work. But since she has left things to escalate to this level she has to endure it and move out of the room. And she should set up some boundaries. I always tell my female friends that the best way to stay with another girl in a lodge or hostel is to set up some boundaries. Like, don't use anything that belongs to your room mate, and even if you want make sure u tell her before collecting it so that she will tell you before using yours. And even when she takes it without telling u once you find out address the issue and tell her that you don't like people using your stuffs without telling you, provide yourself with the things you need, cook on your own and don't allow her to go to your pot of food unless you ask her to but it's better you do it yourself, don't go to hers, if you want to eat her food openly tell her if she wants yours give her but never cook with her in the same pot. If you have a room mate mind how you do things and how you relate to her if not one day things will happen and you may not be able to bear it. So it's better you state your boundaries and maintain it and save yourself some headache. Girls our own just too much.

Jennydoris: Sometimes, tolerance does not work. But since she has left things to escalate to this level she has to endure it and move out of the room. And she should set up some boundaries. I always tell my female friends that the best way to stay with another girl in a lodge or hostel is to set up some boundaries. Like, don't use anything that belongs to your room mate, and even if you want make sure u tell her before collecting it so that she will tell you before using yours. And even when she takes it without telling u once you find out address the issue and tell her that you don't like people using your stuffs without telling you, provide yourself with the things you need, cook on your own and don't allow her to go to your pot of food unless you ask her to but it's better you do it yourself, don't go to hers, if you want to eat her food openly tell her if she wants yours give her but never cook with her in the same pot. If you have a room mate mind how you do things and how you relate to her if not one day things will happen and you may not be able to bear it. So it's better you state your boundaries and maintain it and save yourself some headache. Girls our own just too much.

Exactly..set boundaries!..that is the best..felt my friend's pain sha..

firstly, its expected; we girls have issues..living together is drama.
well i dont know who is accomodating who but sometimes being tolerant can be okay atimes i.e if your roomate has a sense and reasoning to understand the idealogy else it will be better to rain cat and dog. now, what i mean is that: when you try to accomodate laziness and you arent seeing efforts being made to be helpful in the house, anger piles up..then i think it would have been a nice time to chit chat calmly else the otherwise. but either way, i dont believe in tolerance. i speak out.

NaijaChild: I don't really know the section to categorize this topic so I felt I should put it here since its about friendship.

A friend of mine have a room mate who lives with her. she complains to me all the time about the girl's laziness and how she can't even pick up a broom or mop to do anything. We advised her to sit the girl down and talk to her about the chores but she prefers to tolerant and keep her silence while doing the chores in order to avoid quarrel,argument or unnecessary misunderstanding since she will soon be packing out.

Now,it happened that there was this unforeseen event that occurred while they were in the kitchen concerning a utensil which she wanted to use but the girl also wanted it but later gave it to her. After cooking,she left and want to eat then the girl came and told her that the pot was actually hers.Yes,the pot is actually hers but what annoyed my friend was that the pot was left for three days in the kitchen without been washed and No,she didn't realize at first that the pot wasn't hers since the cover was actually hers.

This event resulted into insults from the girl to my friend and this caused serious quarrel that she has been trying to avoid. If only she had trashed out the issue of laziness and other problems between them, I think this problem wouldn't have come up because the girl would have washed the pot earlier and there wouldn't have been an issue.

So,I want to know because my friend believes in tolerance...is tolerance and silence the best way of handling issues?

I no get time for that kinda long epistle

NaijaChild: I don't really know the section to categorize this topic so I felt I should put it here since its about friendship.

A friend of mine have a room mate who lives with her. she complains to me all the time about the girl's laziness and how she can't even pick up a broom or mop to do anything. We advised her to sit the girl down and talk to her about the chores but she prefers to tolerant and keep her silence while doing the chores in order to avoid quarrel,argument or unnecessary misunderstanding since she will soon be packing out.

Now,it happened that there was this unforeseen event that occurred while they were in the kitchen concerning a utensil which she wanted to use but the girl also wanted it but later gave it to her. After cooking,she left and want to eat then the girl came and told her that the pot was actually hers.Yes,the pot is actually hers but what annoyed my friend was that the pot was left for three days in the kitchen without been washed and No,she didn't realize at first that the pot wasn't hers since the cover was actually hers.

This event resulted into insults from the girl to my friend and this caused serious quarrel that she has been trying to avoid. If only she had trashed out the issue of laziness and other problems between them, I think this problem wouldn't have come up because the girl would have washed the pot earlier and there wouldn't have been an issue.

So,I want to know because my friend believes in tolerance...is tolerance and silence the best way of handling issues?
I no get time for that kinda long epistle

NaijaChild: I don't really know the section to categorize this topic so I felt I should put it here since its about friendship.

A friend of mine have a room mate who lives with her. she complains to me all the time about the girl's laziness and how she can't even pick up a broom or mop to do anything. We advised her to sit the girl down and talk to her about the chores but she prefers to tolerant and keep her silence while doing the chores in order to avoid quarrel,argument or unnecessary misunderstanding since she will soon be packing out.

Now,it happened that there was this unforeseen event that occurred while they were in the kitchen concerning a utensil which she wanted to use but the girl also wanted it but later gave it to her. After cooking,she left and want to eat then the girl came and told her that the pot was actually hers.Yes,the pot is actually hers but what annoyed my friend was that the pot was left for three days in the kitchen without been washed and No,she didn't realize at first that the pot wasn't hers since the cover was actually hers.

This event resulted into insults from the girl to my friend and this caused serious quarrel that she has been trying to avoid. If only she had trashed out the issue of laziness and other problems between them, I think this problem wouldn't have come up because the girl would have washed the pot earlier and there wouldn't have been an issue.

So,I want to know because my friend believes in tolerance...is tolerance and silence the best way of handling issues?

I no get time for that kinda long epistle JUX WANNA INFORM NAIRALANDERS OF DIA NEWEST MEMBER VERALYNX#1st tym on nairaland#

veralynx: I no get time for that kinda long epistle

I no get time for that kinda long epistle

I no get time for that kinda long epistle JUX WANNA INFORM NAIRALANDERS OF DIA NEWEST MEMBER VERALYNX#1st tym on nairaland#

Babe, I will advice you have such time for the long epistle else the day you write your own no body will have time for yours. Any ways, welcome on board.

Tolerance is the best thing to do....

One of those reasons I cant tolerate co-habitation again....Had similar experience back in school...

I had to tolerate her to make peace reign.....Thats after enough talking and advising.....I accepted maybe its her weakness....

It got to a time people started advising me about her...I chose to ignore all her flaws....And keep doing the house chores since its not even a very big room....

Please advise your friend to keep ignoring her flaws just to make peace reign....

If she knws she cant tolerate the attitude again....She should manage till the next session....