Administrator for pls.

He who finds a good wife finds a good thing, but
beyond the success of making a good choice of a
partner, a study has shown that there are other
factors that are instrumental to having a lasting
union and marital bliss.
According to the study, one of the keys to a long-
lasting marriage, successful or harmonious marital
union, is for the wife to be happy.
According to the study, the more content the wife
is with the marriage, the happier the husband
would be, which would improve his well being and
general health. The study, published in the Journal
of Marriage and Family on September 2, 2014
found that when it comes to harmonious marital
union, the woman’s happiness is more crucial
than the husband’s in maintaining marital bliss
and in the health of the relationship.
Above and beyond the key role women play in the
home such as Raising the children and supporting
the husband, their well being, happiness and joy
could determine how enjoyable and lasting the
marriage would be.
The study, led by a Professor and Chair in the
Department of Sociology, Rutgers University,
United States, Dr. Deborah Carr, advised that men
who are unhappy in their marriage should avoid
being selfish and focus on their wives’ happiness.
The study emphasises that the key to marital bliss
is all about women’s feelings, and the happier they
are in the marriage, the better.
The researchers studied about 400 couples in
which at least one of the partners was over the age
of 60 years old and had been married for 39 years
on the average.
The couples were given surveys to assess the
quality of their marriage. The researchers also
assessed the quality of feelings that they held
towards one another by asking a series of
questions such as, if they felt their spouse
genuinely appreciated them, how often they argued
and if they felt their spouses respected their
opinion or point of view. The participants were
also asked to write a diary, which detailed the last
24 hours that they had spent with their spouse, and
to assess their own feelings of happiness during
shared activities like shopping, chores and
watching TV.
Carr and her colleagues found that in general, the
couples that were used in the study reported very
high levels of life satisfaction, which led the
researchers to conclude that long and happy
marriages had some link with high levels of life
satisfaction. For married men, how highly their
wives rate the marriage affects their overall
happiness.
There was also a trend seen with the levels of life
satisfaction reported from both partners and the
happiness of the wife. The couples in which the
female partner reported higher levels of overall
happiness reported greater life satisfaction on both
sides. Carr explained that when a woman is happy,
she tends to naturally want to do more for her
husband, which in turn makes him happy too. She
explained that for both spouses, being in a better-
rated marriage was linked to greater life
satisfaction and happiness and that the study is
important because the quality of a marriage can
affect the health and wellbeing of older people as
they continue to age.
The researchers also suggested that when women
are unhappy, they tend to be more vocal about
their unhappiness than men are. When a woman
is unhappy, therefore, her husband may also feel
so due to her disposition. While previous studies
have shown that happiness has an important role
in a people’s general health and wellbeing, a study
from the University of Wisconsin-Madison
reported that depression was more common in
people who remain in stressful marriage situations.
In addition, this new study showed that the key to
a happy marriage and a happy life might just be to
make the wife happy.
“The quality of a marriage is important because it
provides a buffer against the health-depleting
effects of later life stressors and helps couples
manage difficult decisions regarding health and
medical decision making, hence, the quality of a
marriage can affect the health of older people as
they age,” Carr explained.
The researchers said the study is particularly
important because health and wellbeing can be
impacted by marriage quality and that how happy
a woman believes her marriage is has a direct
impact on the quality of her husband’s life,
regardless of how he feels about their nuptials.
In other words, happily married women are also
more likely to boost their husband’s ego by
praising him and less likely to give him the kind of
tongue-lashing abuses associated with families with
marital problems.
According to 100weddingtips.com , the secrets to a
happy marriage include effective heart-to-heart
communication to understand each other’s needs
and happiness, being a good listener, laughter,
good humour, honesty, which involves clarity of
feelings and intentions, showing love, affection,
respect, and equality, which involves sharing
house work, etc.
Reacting to the study, a consultant psychologist,
Prof. Toba Elegbeleye, said making each other
happy in a marriage should be mutual and not
one sided. He added that when every other thing is
okay, there is the possibility that a little effort
would allow for happiness and that it may not be
entirely correct for somebody to make initiating
and complementing happiness in another person’s
lives his sole duty. He said, “I think it’s mutual in
the sense that when one initiates it, the other
person complements it, it’s not necessary that one
person has to initiate it at all times,” he added.
“There are other things in a marriage that make
for happiness beyond the conscious efforts of the
husband to initiate happiness, such as, if the
woman becomes pregnant and delivers at the right
time without any problem, if the social standing of
the couple in their mini-society is quite good and
they have financial surplus, the happiness is
guaranteed. But when most of these ancillary
perquisites are not there, how can a poor husband
make his wife happy.”
He explained further that men tend to be less vocal
if they don’t have happiness in their marriage
unlike women who tend to show theirs. “It could
be seen as a sign of weakness and failure for the
man if he shares such, not forgetting that he has
several social outlets, unlike women for whom it’s
quite unusual to go to bars or pubs to make up for
a bad marriage, hence, they tend to seek approval
and sympathy from other people so as to find an
outlet for their emotion.
“So, for men, rather than go to meet other
colleagues of theirs to start telling them about the
problem in their marriage, they might take solace
in drinking, going to social club or womanising,”
he said.

Hmmn..._shey_na_only_man_waka_do_all_these.