Sophyrocks:


I think you should answer those questions yourself. You already know the answers. Marriage isnt compulsory. I never said so.

Becalm:
@DCMG

You can not be in marriage and satisfy yourself alone. Marriage is two people coming together to become one. By being one, they share almost everything joy, sadness, grow together etc. But because it is not a perfect system, crises can arise like in the case of the poster. There is no smoke without fire, there is certainly a trigger to the wife's behaviour. As meaningless or serious the trigger may be, if it can be found out, the solution to the problem is not far-fetched. But if the individual in question is being impossible as in OP's case, you can ignore her completely (withdraw attention etc) for a while as a temporary solution only.
For your own good, leave Sophyrocks alone cos if she prepares for you? ........................

Dcmg:
From your definition,it means i'm selfish.
Isokay o!

Becalm:
@DCMG

You can not be in marriage and satisfy yourself alone. Marriage is two people coming together to become one. By being one, they share almost everything joy, sadness, grow together etc. But because it is not a perfect system, crises can arise like in the case of the poster. There is no smoke without fire, there is certainly a trigger to the wife's behaviour. As meaningless or serious the trigger may be, if it can be found out, the solution to the problem is not far-fetched. But if the individual in question is being impossible as in OP's case, you can ignore her completely (withdraw attention etc) for a while as a temporary solution only.
For your own good, leave Sophyrocks alone cos if she prepares for you? ........................

Dcmg:
You guys tend to believe everybody has the same capacity as yours.
One of the things i hate most in my life is unnecessary stress in relationship,that idea of always working to make things work in the relationship,in the words of some women "spicing up a relationship"just to please your partner even if you are displeasing yourself.Even in pains or hard times,most women dnt even care to know what you are going through,all they want is for you to satisfy their every needs and if you can't give to them what they want,that's a problem.Who get that kind strenght?
Mehn,some men dey try o,I swear.
As for me,i can never displease my self just to pls my partner.Na divorce sure pass

Sophyrocks:


Not necessarily. It depends on the reason why you dnt want to get married. Are the reasons selfish or genuine? If you can show kindness and compassion towards others, what stops you from doing the same towards your wife and children?

Becalm:
@Sophyrocks

Don't take me serious, I was only trying to scare him. You can see that he is already very scared.

Becalm:
@Sophyrocks

Don't take me serious, I was only trying to scare him. You can see that he is already very scared.

Dcmg:
The reason i MIGHT get married would be becos of having Children.
And yes,i can give tha same compasion to my children.
As a matter of fact,i love spending so much time with kids than with a woman.That's me
I could spend everything i have on my children and take them anywhere they wana go,but i can't say same for my woman partner.

Dcmg:
Yimu!Scare me say she be God?Nawa

Sophyrocks:


You see. With this mindset of yours, you shouldnt get married. Honestly. The truth about marriage is that SOMETIMES you have to displease yourself to please your spouse. But It would be veeeeeerrrrry wrong to do that at ALL TIMES because it would appear you do way much more than your partner does to make it work.

Well, every mallam with his kettle.

Sophyrocks:


Therefore, you would have to let a lady know your intentions just so that her expectations from you would be less. You would have to marry a woman who also see things the same way you do, who also wants kids but does not neccessarily need a man.

Dcmg:
Good!Not everybody will take the same sh!t

Dcmg:
If i see that kind woman i for happy o.But all the ones i encounter are desperados.They dnt av a life,they believe you should give them attention 24/7
Like seriously,where are all the independent ladies when you need them?
I only see them shouting on internet,but i'v not met any physically.

Sophyrocks:


But i get this feeling that you have issues with women. am i right or wrong?

Dcmg:
Maybe becos they are very unpredictable.

Sophyrocks:



Really? But guess what? its the same thing women say about you men too. So lets just say all humans are unpredictable. Dnt you think?

mk3jax:


Well I have a similar issue with my wife. She was miss perfect agreeing to everything I want when she was looking for marriage and after marriage, her real self started to manifest. First it was constant complain about my family for no reason, then she graduated to wanting to control my life and determine who I am to give money or not and where I can and cannot go. She complains about everything and never appreciating anything I do. I provide all the financial need of the house 100% yet she want me to take care of her parent and siblings(both married and single ones) like i am their father and every time I refuse to send them money it is quarrel. She also expect me to praise her for almost everything she does like I demand same praise for putting her under a roof, paying all the bills, feeding her and our child and making her as comfortable as possible.
She bitches about everything I do making me feel like i am a child that doesn't have a sense of making my own decision despite being very successful in my career and handling lots of real life responsibilities that she can never imagine doing.
After the birth of our child, she turned to something else which in turn made me to make up my mind that I will never have a second child. She has time to watch all her tv programs to make herself happy but as soon as I pick my remote to play a game despite working from morning to night while she sits at home, she complains and I have over time disregarded her complains and do what I want to do to make myself happy. I have just one life to live and being married to someone doesn't gives them a control over my life and if you don't want to stay married to me again, then get the fu.c.k out of my life and go take care of yourself. I almost divorced her sometime ago but just decided to calm down. I hope we do not separate because of my love for our child but if we have to, then so be it because I will not live a life of a prisoner because of a child.

Dcmg:
that makes it 1-1
I av like a lot of problems to deal with,and a relationship with a woman isn't one for what ever reason it might be,i don't just feel it.I think there are a lot of things i would rather commit to than a relationship with a woman that is more worth the time.That might just be it.

ARES:



that is what happens when you marry a woman that is more into the wedding than into the man..... wedding is over marriage has started.....there is no need for pretense anymore......she has achieved her aim and thats all that matters...... I will take it a little bit further to prove something to you..... look are her DP, When was the last time u saw your self as her DP.... It is either ur child or some inspirational write up..... never the spouse. that is how you know women who are just there because society wants them to be there not because of the man the married

texanomaly:
@DukeNija

Great advice! I think I'm in love

@op

https://www.nairaland.com/1830733/how-achieve-better-communication-skills#24997761

coogar:


•she doesn't respect you
•she doesn't appreciate you
•she is a moaner
•she compares you to her father all the time.

divorce isn't even needed now. man up & give her father a call. break it down to him how he has failed as a father to bring up her daughter the proper way.

tell him how disappointed you are to have been scammed to marry a damaged good(his daughter). tell him you are few inches away from driving a dagger into his daughter's heart & if care is not taken, he would be burying his daughter instead of celebrating christmas....

trust me, things would change......

liyuboy:
Hello Peep, i need ur advise,, i am married to a woman i tot was of a certain characteristics upon marriage and two years down the line my only source of happiness are the two children (Boy and Girl) we have.

Despite all I do (as bread winner) to please her she is not appreciative, she disrespect me, she doesn't cook for me, she complains too much, she compares me to her father daily even though i have told her her mother has a better character than her that is why her father would do anything to please her.

I am always unhappy becos of her character, i am thinking of seeking divorce.

What do u guys think?

liyuboy:
Hello Peep, i need ur advise,, i am married to a woman i tot was of a certain characteristics upon marriage and two years down the line my only source of happiness are the two children (Boy and Girl) we have.

Despite all I do (as bread winner) to please her she is not appreciative, she disrespect me, she doesn't cook for me, she complains too much, she compares me to her father daily even though i have told her her mother has a better character than her that is why her father would do anything to please her.

I am always unhappy becos of her character, i am thinking of seeking divorce.

What do u guys think?