Well, the girl wasn't sensible. She should have told her sister that the work was too much, and not told the man. As for the man, that's for another day.

Strong and sensible opinion?
Ok I've heard you.

I hope that settles it

TribalEAST:
when cococandy can't counter a strong and sensible opinion, she does the above.

Talon05:

Well-done. Really well-done.

Typical. Very typical of you. You just have to try your best possible to ridicule this woman by finding lapses in her life, finding fault in something she has no power over just to achieve your aim because she has a differing opinion to yours?, now that is very low of you. If doing this brings peace and serenity into your life, go on.

All the best.

you just gotta enjoy this guy's comment. These feminists are just plain foolish and wicked. Just cos she differs in opinion with hers, she decided to dig around just to find something to use against her. Smh! That's why debates with carefreewannabe never ends; she veers off topic and takes you through a merry go round till you start sensing you've lost direction, a feeling she terms as victory on her part.

TribalEAST:
you just gotta enjoy this guy's comment. These feminists are just plain foolish and wicked. Just cos she differs in opinion with hers, she decided to dig around just to find something to use against her. Smh! That's why debates with carefreewannabe never ends; she veers off topic and takes you through a merry go round till you start sensing you've lost direction, a feeling she terms as victory on her part.

I didn't bring envy in families into the discussion.

carefreewannabe:


I don't care whether she is successful or not, everyone is successful on NL

I just think that envy in a family is nothing to be proud of.
A family should be a supportive and not a competitive system.
If there is envy and competition in a family, then something is very wrong with it.

You are right on this but this lady is just a victim of circumstance and you trying to rub it in her face is not fair.

I am happy for her, despite all the competition and envy in her family, she turned out really fine and thats something only few people can achieve. She went from being a victim to a victrix so step back and stop what you trying to do to her. Again, its not fair.

carefreewannabe:


You are free to ignore me if you think that I am boring.

How would I when you find it difficult to ignore me, huh?

Amelian:





thanks for the congrats on my new marriage, but why shud I announce this one to nld or to any website, when the ones I mentioned didn't smell the time of day... abeg ooooo, chillisauce, remove eye from my marriage, focus on yours. [b]Am not the type that will display pics of my private affairs online. [/b]For me, marriage and even the ceremony itself is very private to me and my hubby. At least, when we did the Introduction, traditional and white wedding, I didn't beg for your contribution, or any onelse.
so biko, remove eye . chillisauce

why will i remove my eyes when i was the one supporting you during that crisis. Is that how you treat a sister .

Anyway, make sure its not lagos marriage, if not.

meanwhile, your pics is scattered all over nairaland by you. are you not the yellow sisi, with a fashion shop

carefreewannabe:


I didn't bring envy in families into the discussion.

you made it a subject when you pulled it from her comment with its subtle nature and blew it beyond proportion.

TribalEAST:
the man is not the one subjecting her to slavery but her own sister. I don't think the man demanded all the effort she puts in. I believe the wife must have assigned her own duties to her sister due to lazy and female wickedness. Perhaps, she believes since they are assisting her that much, then she ought to slave for them. The man might not know she washes for him thinking it's his wife that does it. If he knew and didn't stop it, then I blame him. But I think the wife could have restrained him, claiming the affair was between she and her sweet and willing to help sister. The man had every right to throw her out of his house for being challenged by her. The wife now has 2 problems to deal with: doing the chores and trying to win back a sister's love. As for the lady, she needs to bury her pride and return or be on her on to face the consequences.

everything here, you find a way to turn it into gender war, dont you people get tired ni

i don talk my own, talk your own then move on. ah ah. na wah

Talon05:

You are right on this but this lady is just a victim of circumstance and you trying to rub it in her face is not fair.

I don't consider her a victim because she was born into a polygamous home.
I have a problem with this mindset "My mother was better than the other wives."
Either you marry into a polygamous home and consider the other wives your family or you better stay out of it.
And as a child from a polygamous home, you better learn to show more respect to the mothers of your half-siblings.

Are you a family or not? What now?

I am happy for her, despite all the competition and envy in her family, she turned out really fine and thats something only few people can achieve. She went from being a victim to a victrix so step back and stop what you trying to do to her. Again, its not fair.

Maybe she turned out just fine, maybe not. I don't know.

TribalEAST:
you made it a subject when you pulled it from her comment with its subtle nature and blew it beyond proportion.

Nothing was subtle about it.

carefreewannabe:


Nothing was subtle about it.

it was subtle cos it was just chipped into her comment and not the topic nor the main body, but you singled that little line out and sat on it like it's a new thread. Go back and check the amount of posts you've had over the issue.

TribalEAST:
it was subtle cos it was just chipped into her comment and not the topic nor the main body, but you singled that little line out and sat on it like it's a new thread. Go back and check the amount of posts you've had over the issue.

And your point is?

carefreewannabe:


I don't consider her a victim because she was born into a polygamous home.
I have a problem with this mindset "My mother was better than the other wives."
Either you marry into a polygamous home and consider the other wives your family or you better stay out of it.
And as a child from a polygamous home, you better learn to show more respect to the mothers of your half-siblings.

Are you a family or not? What now?



Maybe she turned out just fine, maybe not. I don't know.

Am I a family?, really carefree?

What if, just what if her mother was indeed a better wife to her father?, oh please stop acting like you know her story. You know nothing about her and her family so you have no right to condemn or chastise her on whatever it is she say about her family. And yes publicly or publicly.

carefreewannabe:


And your point is?

Lay off her. Trying to ridicule her for some cheap browny point is very low of you. And to think you doing all that just cause she got a differing opinion to yours.

Talon05:

Am I a family?, really carefree?

I wasn't talking about you.

What if, just what if her mother was indeed a better wife to her father?, oh please stop acting like you know her story. You know nothing about her and her family so you have no right to condemn or chastise her on whatever it is she say about her family. And yes publicly or publicly.

I am not acting like I know her story, I am only referring to what she chose to share with us.
Is it a crime?

carefreewannabe:


I wasn't talking about you.



I am not acting like I know her story, I am only referring to what she chose to share with us.
Is it a crime?

YES

Talon05:

Lay off her.

Or else?

Trying to ridicule her for some cheap browny point is very low of you. And to think you doing all that just cause she got a differing opinion to yours.

Yeah, I really think it is ridiculous from someone from a polygamous family to come online and to tell everyone, who cares, how her mother was so much better than the mothers of her other siblings.

My family is a unity, not a war zone so I find her message quite disturbing.

Talon05:

YES

Then call the police.

carefreewannabe:


Or else?




Yeah, I really think it is ridiculous from someone from a polygamous family to come online and to tell everyone, who cares, how her mother was so much better than the mothers of her other siblings.

My family is a unity, not a war zone so I find her message quite disturbing.

Then call a police.

Talon05:

Then call a police.

Why, is it a crime?

carefreewannabe:


Why, is it a crime?

If her post is disturbing you in anyway then YES its a crime.

Talon05:

YES

Then call the police.

carefreewannabe:


Then call the police.

I will if that will help you find peace.

Talon05:

I will if that will help you find peace.

I have a lot of peace.
My mama did not have to compete against other wives to get daddy's love.
Neither will I have to endure such stress.

Very entertaining section on a hot day

My only problem with this young girl is the level of her confusion. If you think men should help out in the home, then he should do so irrespective of his employment status. If you think he shouldn't, same goes. But to wake up one morning and decide he must help because now he's unemployed? even though he's proven to be capable in keeping his own end of providing finances.

Anyway, I think men should help out when they can (and make out time even when they think they can't sef). It's hard juggling work and house chores and feels bad when the men are lounging around doing nothing.



Is this even a feminist thing?

carefreewannabe:


I have a lot of peace.
My mama did not have to compete against other wives to get daddy's love.
Neither will I have to endure such stress.

Oh miss carefree, miss-i-have-a-perfectlife-and-a-perfectfamily. Now, clap for yourself.

I'm sure many people on here dont think you have peace, now thats something to worry about.

Talon05:

Oh miss carefree, miss-i-have-a-perfectlife-and-a-perfectfamily. Now, clap for yourself.

I'm sure many people on here dont think you have peace, now thats something to worry about.

MOST PEOPLE HERE ARE RE*TARDS.
I am happy those re*tards think something is wrong with me and my life. It actually means that everything is ok.

carefreewannabe:


MOST PEOPLE HERE ARE RE*TARDS.
I am happy those re*tards think something is wrong with me and my life. It actually means that everything is ok.

It cant be luck all these "retards" think the same thing of you, maybe you should go sit somewhere quiet and do some re-evaluation about your life.

Think about it.

Talon05:

It cant be luck all these "retards" think the same thing of you, maybe you should go sit somewhere quiet and do some re-evaluation about your life.

Think about it.

It is not luck, it is collective backwardness.

Nonso23:


This is bullying.
She is being human not idealistic. It's only normal that she likes her mother better than the rest of the wives and I see nothing wrong in broadcasting it to the world - as long as it is not a crime and she's being true to herself.
The family grew up competing amongst themselves and turned out very okay. I believe you know that there is such a thing as healthy competition?
She said she had a beautiful childhood, great parents, siblings and half siblings, she said has a stable job and a loving family and above all she is happy. I believe that's all we need to conclude that she turned out just perfect.
There is no particular ideal socio-dynamic formula for every family. As long as they turn out to be responsible citizens their model is good too.

The topic is about house chores and husbands not envy in families. You are veering off a tangent.

Yeah yeah yeah, now you all defend her family because you like her opinion but when she insulted the family of the person she described, nobody mentioned anything.