[quote author=Sophyrocks post=27691226]That is the Nigerian context of a good african wife, a good wife material. she must be willing to put her life on the line for the sake of her family, most of the time for her husband. she must be willing to swallow all sorts of stds, must be willing to go through emotional stress for long periods using prayer as an antidote for any problem. The longer the stress, the more stronger and virtuous she is seen to be. My people, did the bible ever describe a virtuous woman as one who suffers? Is God in supporrt of the suffering of humans?

She must be willing to be a deaf and dumb woman somewhat equivalent to a puppet or baby doll. Yet She must still be the one to hold the family together no matter what (now you wonder where the function of the so called 'Head' of family comes in). She must break her back and go through all sorts of iniquities so that she can be viewed as a 'wife material'. To the average nigerian, Marriage is pain, pain is love. That is why you see mentally unstable men who deliberately make their wives and even children, suffer. Sometimes it is done to prove a point. Such men believe that since their mothers suffered in the hands of their fathers, therefore, their wives must suffer. that is why you hear statements like "Our mothers went through this or that, why can't you go through the same"? Always comparing women with their mothers. My people, can two people from different backgrounds ever be alike? is it possible for two generations that are apart to be simiilar in choices and orientations?

After going through all these stress and tribulations, she is still expected not to change physically but to remain a sweet 16 and her s*e*x*ual prowess in bed must be top notch. My people, is this ever possible?



Anyone who reads this will be quick to sympathize and take sides with you. But the reality is that MOST times, this scenario of suffering according to you is the woman's side alone. A deeper dig will reveal something entirely different.

When you say a woman must be deaf and dumb, deaf and dumb to what? We all know how desperately too much TV and westernisation is trying and succeeding at turning our wives to emperors and regents in their homes, and you expect the man to stomach it? When the ruling is done both subtly and emotionally, using all manner of weapons, only a gold digger wouldn't put up resistance.

The fact that no two people from different generations will be d same does not imply that there are no benchmarks that are timeless. Challenging your husband under any guise is wrong and will be resisted.
The proverbs 31 kind of woman is meek, hardworking, temperate, and considerate. I didn't add respectful. It is not suffering. And who says the task of catering for a home is not a suffering of sorts too?

[quote author=poik post=27779842][/quote]


why are you requoting me? Answer my question truthfully. why are you dodging? do you have something to hide? are you a perfect man or not?

All that matters is that you spend quality time with your family. I am very time conscious, I understand the concept of time and please everything I can do to cut corners and spend some private time with hubby and quality time with the kids, you best believe it I am cutting with all guns blazing. Why would I want to hand wash a whole load of laundry etc.all because I want to be seen as good, we get who we deserve truly because I trust my hubby, he will be like who send you message

vanitty:
All that matters is that you spend quality time with your family. I am very time conscious, I understand the concept of time and please everything I can do to cut corners and spend some private time with hubby and quality time with the kids, you best believe it I am cutting with all guns blazing. Why would I want to hand wash a whole load of laundry etc.all because I want to be seen as good, we get who we deserve truly because I trust my hubby, he will be like who send you message

Agreed 1000 %

Bitojoe:
I beg you in the name of God.if your husband love pounded Yam,better pound it for him.even if you can't pound,learn how to pound.otherwise,there is one tiny lady eyeing your husband.

He shld go and marry her because of pounded yam na

ajuwarhodes:






He shld go and marry her because of pounded yam na

ROTFLMAO. Some people will write pounded yam into their marriage vows. Nonsense

soulglo:



ROTFLMAO. Some people will write pounded yam into their marriage vows. Nonsense

When are you going to make some pounded yam for me?

SirShymex:


When are you going to make some pounded yam for me?

Too busy pounding for my boss

Nashville:


I consider you one of the very mature people on this section (even from your previous moniker) so I am quite surprised when you talk about "forgiveness" from another thread. I remember the thread but I cant remember who said what? I respond to comments and not to people; so I dont keep tabs of who said what on a thread.

Back to the topic. I was just trying to give you some idea of what people are going through in Nigeria - not by choice, or a wicked husband; but the unfortunate situations they find themselves. One of my biggest issues with "9ja boys" is that they are generally big spenders. In fact they overspend and some even borrow sef to buy cars, gadgets etc. So I would be very surprised to see a guy who drives a prado or range and yet his wife does not have a gas cooker. I havent seen one. One the contrary, some of the ones I know will pay for a househelp to go with them on a family vacation. Several families have come to visit us and they had house helps come with them. I will not suggest they are lazy, I probably will do the same if I could easily afford it. Denying our women material goods is very unafrican and I can say that anywhere.

But most Nigerians dont have that type of lifestyle I just described. Imagine a man who earns 150,00 naira (and that is a decent salary); then his wife says she needs a dishwasher of 70,000 naira. Lets even assume that they can save towards it, the bigger issue is that they haven't had electricity for three weeks, and the small generator cannot power a dishwater. So they would need a bigger generator too. My point is that most of those people you see suffering; aint really by choice, neither is it because they have wicked husbands; 95% of these women just cannot afford these gadgets.

And when you talk about epidural; birthing method is different for every woman. Less than half of women in the US use epidural and its not because they have wicked husbands who think they are lazy. Many women in the UK choose to give birth at home. And in Nigeria, birthing methods are rooted in deep cultural practises. You need to travel more to northern Nigeria and see how women give birth.

If giving you an honest opinion of why people are suffering doesnt go down well with you, I'm very happy to stay of your thread.

Love your write up...really did.

I'm not sure you got the facts straight about US women preferring no epidural, when in fact there is campaigning done to deter women as it is, much as 75% use epidural, pitosin is over prescribed and breastfeeding isn't mainstream.

soulglo:


Too busy pounding for my boss

Pounding what, though? A lot of things get pounded these days yano.

Er, don't say - so you do have a big boss, despite the bosslady trait you show on here, no?

Domesticating a lioness has always been my dream, now I know you can be tamed.

Why does shymexx derail every thread he posts on?

tpia6:
Why does shymexx derail every thread he posts on?

I'm just not coachable, and even Phil Jackson can't coach me.

The world is mine, tpia - and I'm just out for presidents to represent me.

SirShymex:




The world is mine

lol

tpia6:



lol

Don't be a paigon!

All I need is one mic, to tell you it's mine!

Lol

tpia6:
Lol

Lol, I'm so elated I made you laugh cos you never smile.

Darn! I'm the new Dave Chappelle before his trip to Africa!

lol

SirShymex:


Pounding what, though? A lot of things get pounded these days yano.

Er, don't say - so you do have a big boss, despite the bosslady trait you show on here, no?

Domesticating a lioness has always been my dream, now I know you can be tamed.

It's very obvious you want a lioness to tame for some reason it's obvious. Sad thing is you can't handle it. You'd be eaten raw. Leave the lionesses for the calm wiser ones

soulglo:


It's very obvious you want a lioness to tame for some reason it's obvious. Sad thing is you can't handle it. You'd be eaten raw. Leave the lionesses for the calm wiser ones

Lmao...why do you like taking shots at the throne, rather than respect it? I like the feistiness, though. And like Shakespeare said, "Modest doubt is called the beacon of the wise."

Er, you think you know but you don't know. Just stick to the simplicity of understanding cos knowing is complicated.

Anyway, the lioness can run faster, running farther is the name of the game. And if the waiting game is too long, you just feed the lioness, and both the predator and prey will live happily together.

SirShymex:


Lmao...why do you like taking shots at the throne, rather than respect it? I like the feistiness, though. And like Shakespeare said, "Modest doubt is called the beacon of the wise."

Er, you think you know but you don't know. Just stick to the simplicity of understanding cos knowing is complicated.

Anyway, the lioness can run faster, running farther is the name of the game. And if the waiting game is too long, you just feed the lioness, and both the predator and prey will live happily together.

Awwww. And herein lies the problem. You wouldn't know how to feed a lioness. Not taking shots oh. You wouldn't do well with a lioness

soulglo:


Awwww. And herein lies the problem. You wouldn't know how to feed a lioness. Not taking shots oh. You wouldn't do well with a lioness

Lol, you need to bring that adjective that stole my e-heart into it. The lioness craves satisfaction in that department the most.

Once you feed it properly in that aspect, every other thing will fall into place as long as orderliness can be maintained.

[quote
author=scribble post=27704657]the only logical reason for a man
complaining about yam pounder is he cannot deal with the cost of the
machine


I bought one the other year, cost like 50k

but the convenience it brings is amazing

if dish washer dey, by all means she should use that too

she can spend her time more efficiently, nothing wrong with that

if she is watching telemundo (for the love of God ) then she is
giving me ME time, which is always desirable[/quote]

pls wats d make of ur pounding machine?