This Nigerian bride, Lola Akindele Busari has given us a reason why ladies should reserve their virginity till their wedding nights. She shared her inspiring story with Bellanaija and we decided to share it here too. It wasn't all easy.....her first three boyfriends left her because they were not ready to accept her 'TeamVTillWN" principle....when she turned 26 however, she cried to God........it's quite a long story of waiting on God and how faithful God is...she further revealed how difficult it was, letting her husband come into her soul, the first time, on their wedding night...and more...enjoy the long but eye-opening piece below:

How Lola and Dayo met

At the end of July 2010, I had just come back from a holiday with my sister and friends and I was also rounding up my dissertation for my masters program. I was ready for the next stage of my life and I prayed for God to reveal my future husband, as I didn’t want to be lead astray by some of the guys in my life who had shown interest at that time.I decided to do a week of prayer and fasting for God to please lead me to my future husband and to give me a discerning spirit throughout the whole process.
Being 26 years old, from the age of 16 up until I was 23, I had had 3 different boyfriends at different stages throughout that time. The reason nfor breaking up with each one however, had always been the same.
None of them could understand or accept my views on having no sex until marriage (even though they said they were fine with it at first). I had made this decision when I was 13 at my old church, KICC, after reading Pastor Matthew Ashimolowo’s book, “Let’s Talk About Sex” and it’s a decision that God has allowed me to keep, by His Grace.

So this time, I really needed God to bring the man hat He had already destined for me to be with and not someone who I wanted to chose with myown reasoning.The first day of my fast for the week was in August which was the first day that Pastor Matthew Ashimolowo had given out his mobile number for people to call him, just before IGOC 2010. My mother encouraged me to call him and so I did. I told Pastor Matthew my prayer points regarding my future husband and we both prayedfor a discerning spirit so that I would know the right one whom God has chosen for me.

Strangely, throughout that week, I randomly received messages and calls from my ex boyfriends, telling me that they still wanted to be with me etc – but I was able to dismiss their advances without being drawn back in. Furthermore, for each of these ex boyfriends, God revealed things to me about them that were warning signs, confirming that He did not want me to be with them.
On the last day of my week of fasting I received a message from an old friend from University called Dayo. We had studied at Queen Mary’s together in 2006, until he left for a different university (UCL) where he completed his masters program. We occasionally kept in touch from time to time. But at this point, we hadn’t spoken for a while and I didn’t know his intentions and was not prepared to ‘waste’ time with another guy who was not ready to deal with my views on abstinence, so I ignored his message without blinking an eyelid.
Surprisingly, later that day, my mother randomly asked after him, saying that she hadn’t heard me mention him for a while. I was shocked and told her that he had actually sent me a message that morning. She urged me to reply to his message, which I did reluctantly.

He Was The Answer to My Prayers

We eventually started speaking, and when I asked why he had decided to contact me after solong, I learned that for some reason, after such a long time, he just felt an inexplicable urge to send me a message on the morning that had turned out to be my last day of prayer and fasting.
And thus began the start of something good. Until the night after our second date, when we were speaking on the phone and I asked him which church he attended. It was at this point that he went silent on the phone. He then said he had something to tell me, something that he had wanted to tell me face to face.
I urged him to go on and that’s when he finally told me that he was a Muslim! I honestly felt like I’d been slapped in the face by a mighty wave of shock and disbelief. Nevertheless, I simply informed him that we would just have to be friends and that as a believer in Christ, there would be no way that our relationship could go further towards the road of marriage.I informed my parents and they supported my decision, however, I could feel a strong urging in my spirit, telling me not to break up our relationship and to just stay where I was with him. Of this I was certain but what I was not certain of was of how God wanted this to go. Was sI just supposed to be a friend to him who would introduce him to Christ and after a period of time we would go our separate ways?

Angelic Intervention

It was not until January 2011 that God began to speak to me so clearly. At the start of January, I awoke at 3am to a bright light shining in my bedroom. There, standing by my wardrobe was a very tall angel dressed in sparkling white robes.I was so afraid and I could feel a strange sensation surging through my body that would cause me to shake, like my whole body was vibrating and shock waves were going through me but at the same time it was a beautiful feeling.
And then the angel spoke to me. It said that God has seen that I’ve been worried about Dayo being a Muslim, but that I shouldn’t worry about it because in the Lord’s own time, He will bring Dayo to Christ and that the Lord has called for us to be together as husband and wife.I was shocked, afraid, amazed and glad all at the same time. I couldn’t even speak and the Holy Spirit instructed me to write everything down thatthe angel had told me. I also wrote down the dateand time that it happened and told my family about the visitation.I was so happy. I had no clue when Dayo’s salvation would take place or when our wedding would be but I trusted in the Lord and even bought my wedding dress and started making wedding plans.
After this, for the next two years, every night at 3am, I would be awoken by the Holy Spirit and be taken to Heaven where I would spend time with the Lord and He would tell me various things about what would happen in my life in the future, as well as about the relationship that he had planned for Dayo and I.One of the key things that Jesus told me during one of my visits was that He himself would bind Dayo and I together with cords of love that cannot be broken and that we will be joined together when we are made of the same material.At one point in 2011 the Lord told me that when Dayo gives his life, a sign will take place and thatsign would be: one of the elders in my church will come me up to me after I have taught my Sunday school class, and enquire of Dayo and the wedding plans.I wrote and documented everything down, sharing the Lord’s messages with my family but not with Dayo, as the Lord had said that I was not to reveal these things to him. That He himself would reveal Himself to Dayo so that all of the Glory would go to God and not to any man.
Each time that God spoke to me, I would feel that same sensation of shock waves surging through my body and His voice would sound like thunder in my ears, so loud and mighty but also very distinctly clear and full of love.

Dayo’s Salvation

That very same night, my mother had a dream that the time for Dayo’s salvation was now. At 3 am, she woke up everyone in my family and told us to pray for Dayo, for his salvation was almost at hand.I prayed, believing in God’s promises but also having a slight sense of doubt and despair, for I knew that the past two years had been so difficult. Furthermore, at this point in time, Dayo and I had taken a break, as I wanted him to seek Christ and the truth for himself, and to not accept Christianity just because of me or to just accept Islam because he had grown up in a Muslim home.I explained that the truth is found in having a true personal experience and relationship with God for yourself and then you will truly know which is the right way to follow God.

God told me that He would put spiritual wings behind Dayo’s ears so that when He calls him to salvation, he would hear and know that Jesus truly is the Lord and to God be the glory, the very next night, after my mother’s dream, Dayo gave his life to Christ and he later explained that he had had a dream that revealed the truth of Christ to him.
The next day was a Sunday…and it was the week that I was scheduled to teach my Sunday school class.
And in accordance with the Lord’s perfect promises, after the service, as I was walking out of Sunday school, the very same elder that God had told me about over a year ago, approached me as I was leaving and asked me about Dayo and the wedding, just as God said it would happen.Straight after I had spoken to this elder, my Pastor, Pastor Ashaye called me aside, saying that he wanted a meeting the next week to discuss the progress regarding Dayo’s salvation.
At this point I hadn’t told him about Dayo’s salvation yet and I truly knew that God was moving.I can only give God the glory because it’s all by His doing. His plans for us will never fail and His pure love for us goes beyond anything that we could imagine.I am truly grateful to God for blessing me with a man who, despite not being a Christian before, still respected my love for Christ and my views regarding no sex before marriage – a view that even my ex Christian boyfriends could never accept.God has blessed me with the man of my dreams and brought me my true prince. In fact, at a time when I questioned God about His decision to bring me a Muslim man instead of a Christian, and I was beginning to feel envious of typical young ladies who found their husbands in Church, God’s exact words to me were:
You have your prince in Dayo. I truly bless the Lord for His faithfulness and I thank God for the encouragement and support of my close friends, my siblings, my father and especially my mother, because God revealed things concerning Dayo’s salvation to her and hersupport throughout it all has been an incredible blessing.


A year after....Losing my Virginity

Now, it’s interesting that I can joke about intimacy. right now – because a year ago, when we got married, to be quite frank…I was in tears when I fully realised how painful it actually was to lose my virginity. It was not a laughing matter at the time AT ALL! And I don’t mean painful in the sense that I felt I was losing a piece of myself… far from it! And it wasn’t even the fact that it just physically REALLY hurt! The thing that ‘pained me’ the most was the fact that I was with the love of my life, we had just had the most beautiful wedding with all our friends and loved ones, dancing away and popping (non alcoholic) sparkling wine… and when it was time to now Pop The Cherry…I was too afraid! I felt as though I was not fulfilling my first wifely task.

We had stayed at the spa hotel in which we got married for a couple of days before we flew off to the Dominican Republic (and not Barbados – private joke) for the honeymoon…and I felt so distraught that I was letting my husband down. On the night of the wedding, I was full of mixed emotions. I had finally gotten married! It was all I had ever dreamed about. I had been planning thebig day since forever… It was so lovely and beautiful and my husband is the best thing that’s happened to me apart from Jesus…he waited for me and respected and adopted my views on having no premarital sex from the beginning – so WHY was it so difficult to Just Do It? ‘Nike’ lied! I wanted to…but just couldn’t.

I swear i ddnt read anythn here.....

She's so beautiful

Vaseline at the Wedding

I was very fortunate to have two married women in my close circle of friends who gave me a lot ofvery useful advice, one of them even slipped me a small container of Vaseline whilst I was on the dance floor in my wedding dress, telling me I would need it for later that night. I was laughing at the time when she gave it to me. I was soon to find out (as mentioned earlier) that it was not a laughing matter at all! I was so lucky, as my wonderful husband is just the best because he was so patient and gentle.
The key is to relax they say…well…according to numerous “How To…” tips on Google that is. I tried to…but I just kept hearing this voice saying…”You’re letting him down…You’re letting him down…He waited for you all these years and now that it’s time to do it you can’t!” It was horrible knowing that it felt like I could not go through with it. The pain, the anxiety, the fear of him being disappointed in me…there was no way I could relax! On top of that, I had heard a story about a young couple who had just recently gotten married and who had requested for an annulment of the marriage because of this very same situation. The wife felt as though she couldn’t go through with losing her virginity, no matter what they tried.

Continuation :
http://www.kemifilani.com/2014/10/nigerian-bride-who-waited-till-her.html?m=1

Story For Amadioha.

…she further revealed how difficult it was, letting her husband come into her soul, the first time, on their wedding night…

Is that another name for.....?

Pretty lady though.

Moral of the story: When you persevere., you'll be able to separate the wheat from the chaff. Good things comes to those who wait. Beautiful couple.., quite inspiring. .

Eeeeeeehhhnnn?

I would be more impressed if the guy was a virgin.

A virgin guy better come up with his own testimony abi is it reserved to women alone?
Baba with two wives will still be looking for a virgin to marry as third.

I hope the guy was a virgin too coz Me no understand the story at all.

And the deflowered ones will be like, "virginity is overrated"

moca:
A virgin guy better come up with his own testimony abi is it reserved to women alone?
Baba with two wives will still be looking for a virgin to marry as third.

Buhaha, I cannot be fooled by all this. You cannot promote female virginity, while the other half of the human species does everything within his power to take the virginity from you and is even praised for it. Totally flies over my head.

This story has landed here? I read it on Bella naija. U need to see the hilarious comments there. I truly commend ladies 4 keeping their virginities but I found this vision story ridiculous. So as a christian, her vision told her she would marry a muslim? O.k. Im hoping her husband is the liberal type and 2nd wife wont appear frm nowhere. After 5-10 yrs then she can come back and talk. And by the way, all these details about the wedding night are totally unnecessary. I guess she is the type that fantasizes a lot. She is still in the euphoria phase. She strikes me as a naive lady with no knowledge of experience (im not talking about experience in bedmatics).

Only if the guy is a virgin will there be any "inspiration" here for people who actually care enough to get inspiration from such stories.

Me? I'mma get up on that horse and grind it hard to see if it's what I need, I can't take the risk, I no wan come back to create thread for NL after 2 months of marriage.


Hehehehe , what a script, angel took you plenty times to haven to go and meet the lord, chei!

The woman wey give vaseline as gift never hear of ky jelly abi na gel ni?

Ndia ga egbu nmadu with all these their stories one day.

Kachisbarbie:


But why do you like seeing the negative part of things like this?
__ especially on marital issues?

She should come back and talk after 5yrs? If one can even last in a marriage for 1 week - I think God deserves to be praised.
I hope the euphoria last her a life time.

Its not negative. I see things as they are. Im a realist. Reality always stares at us in the face. I dnt fantasize. It would look negative to u but its not. To me, its too early for her to bring her story to social media. I have read her first story.If i were her, i wud keep my marital stuff away from social media and focus on my marriage. When did she marry?

Beautiful story

I am happy the lady was patient enough to wait for Dayo to be saved after God revealed Him to her.

Lola ayanfe Dayo, ku orire

Orirere lori mi o (Orirere)

Latin kekere moti moluwa (Orirere)

Mosi tun dagba ninu imole (Orirere).

Lola, queen of Dayo 's heart

It is so beautiful to marry the soulmate God made for yo!

So shud we start running nw?Story 4 d gods abeg

All these long story because of a piece flesh between your Engine box?


Fine lady though....hopefully a piece of hymen will be all it takes to be happily ever after.

Sophyrocks:
This story has landed here? I read it on Bella naija. U need to see the hilarious comments there. I truly commend ladies 4 keeping their virginities but I found this vision story ridiculous. So as a christian, her vision told her she would marry a muslim? O.k. Im hoping her husband is the liberal type and 2nd wife wont appear frm nowhere. After 5-10 yrs then she can come back and talk. And by the way, all these details about the wedding night are totally unnecessary. I guess she is the type that fantasizes a lot. She is still in the euphoria phase. She strikes me as a naive lady with no knowledge of experience.

Thank you! If virgins and LovePeddler*s are crying about distressed marriages alike, what's the big catch? She should have waited for at least 5yrs before giving us the tutorial.


Preserving the maiden hood shouldn't be about men, it should about you and how you want it so you don't get disappointed when he doesn't treat you like some pricey jewel.

Kachisbarbie:


lol...I don't know when she got married. I agree it's bad for her to bring her story to the media...very...very bad.
___but I am an Optimist __ I have a positive outlook to/on life.
@Realist: Is it only the bad things you guys see? don't you guys dream of the great things that could happen if everything goes right?...lol

Anyway I get your point though : just that you never point out the good before going for the bad... I guess that what being a realist is about - presenting the world realistically and not in an idealized or romantic style.

A realist sees both good and bad. A realist sees beyond what you see now. I stated the good in her case; her virginity. Its commendable. When a person is entering fire, a realist will tell you that you are entering fire. And what did i say earlier? I said i hope her husband is the liberal type. I hope his family are not the intrusive type that would influence his decisions later. A radical muslim will change her name to a muslim one, stop her from attending church, make all their children muslims and marry more wives. So im hoping it wont be so for her. things change, humans change. thats reality for you.

Sophyrocks:


Its not negative. I see things as they are. Im a realist. Reality always stares at us in the face. I dnt fantasize. It would look negative to u but its not. To me, its too early for her to bring her story to social media. I have read her first story.If i were her, i wud keep my marital stuff away from social media and focus on my marriage. When did she marry?

I totally agree with you on this one.

Too much fantasies associated with the story. I always like to hear the continuation of such tales in a few years time.

@Freecocoa. Heavily spoilt since 1864!

beeevan:





Thank you! If virgins and LovePeddler*s are crying about distressed marriages alike, what's the big catch? She should have waited for at least 5yrs before giving us the tutorial.


Preserving the maiden hood shouldn't be about men, it should about you and how you want it so you don't get disappointed when he doesn't treat you like some pricey jewel.

Thank you jare. You understand where i am coming from. So from the story, the ultimate prize of virginity was a vision to marry a muslim. lol. I dnt know what to say again.

freecocoa:
Only if the guy is a virgin will there be any "inspiration" here for people who actually care enough to get inspiration from such stories.

Me? I'mma get up on that horse and grind it hard to see if it's what I need, I can't take the risk, I no wan come back to create thread for NL after 2 months of marriage.


Hehehehe , what a script, angel took you plenty times to haven to go and meet the lord, chei!

The woman wey give vaseline as gift never hear of ky jelly abi na gel ni?

Ndia ga egbu nmadu with all these their stories one day.

Hahahahahaha. The bolded was what made a lot of people to criticise and dismiss the story.

iCool:


I totally agree with you on this one.

Too much fantasies associated with the story. I always like to hear the continuation of such tales in a few years time.

@Freecocoa. Heavily spoilt since 1864!

Exactly. She could nt wait. she quickly had to give detailed story of how her hubby disvigined her. Na wa. The story is too fantasy-filled to be inspiring. That vision part is hilarious. Lol.

Beautiful Couple..God bless your home..

The whole story is actually about keeping her virginity - as in the looong 'inspiring' story.

I read the initial fantasies, skipped the whole vision part when i saw the spirit coming every night and then landed at the vaseline part .

We need actual stories of inspiration! Talk of username Xfire's topics.

Daft story.

I've lost count of how many times she died and went to heaven to chat with the heavenly beings over a cup of tea.

freecocoa:
Only if the guy is a virgin will there be any "inspiration" here for people who actually care enough to get inspiration from such stories.
Me? I'mma get up on that horse and grind it hard to see if it's what I need, I can't take the risk, I no wan come back to create thread for NL after 2 months of marriage.
Hehehehe , what a script, angel took you plenty times to haven to go and meet the lord, chei!
The woman wey give vaseline as gift never hear of ky jelly abi na gel ni?
Ndia ga egbu nmadu with all these their stories one day.

My eyes, my eyes o!