lastpage:
This "sexism" can be taken to crazy level at times, even in very mundane things by the feminazis.

For such people, ANYTHING and EVERYTHING is AGAINST WOMEN AND THEY MUST FIGHT TO CHANGE IT!

For example, in Germany, something as simple as "Street Lights" has become the next object of attention of these "attention-seeking" feminazis.
As far as a lot of people are concerned, street lights should guide you into when it is safe to cross the road, not whether it is shaped like "Daddy" or "Mummy" but the Feminazis would have non of that.
Wherever a "male" is represented, a female equivalent/EQUAL has to come up!

Maybe they need to have something more worthwhile to do with their time and energy!

Lastpage!

Truckpusher:
Who invited you here ?
Go home woman,you're drunk already.

Tashamania:


drunk on

I need you home too, you know

Truckpusher:
Stop dreaming about me coming home,I'm on away match tonight.
Sorry eh! Variety is the spice of life they say.

carefreewannabe:


Are you comparing a sane country to the mess called Nigeria?
Germans are at least 100 years ahead of your run down patriarchal society.

Tashamania:


Am calling my lawyer

Truckpusher:
There is no point calling a lawyer sweetheart,just get help from somewhere and be happy.

naijababe:


Yes. In the absence of equity, equality can't be achieved. However, blanket equality does not necessarily translate to equality for all. We'll probably go around in circles let's just agree to disagree.

Tashamania:


You sure about this?

greatnigeria:





Abeg! make una no crucify all Naija men naa...

The beautiful ones are not yet born ...

The wise ones are hiding themselves far far away so that they don't fall prey to the many heart snatchers waiting to empty their pockets and ruin their destiny all in the name of true love

Love today is not blind o... "Shine your eye well well", before you take the leap of faith and crash inside the mud

It is difficult to find true women in Nigeria today who will love you not because of your pocket like you said. So also its difficult to find true men who are true in every sense of the word.

But that does not mean that true men do not exist in Nigeria. that does not mean that true women do not exist in Nigeria

The fact that 'Most' men are sleeping around does not mean all men sleep around. The fact that 'Most' men bully their wives at home does not mean all men are the same. It's all about Understanding and Values which a lot of people claim to have but do not have.

You cannot give what you do not have. You cannot be what you have not trained yourself to be.

Love is ever bearing, love is ever forgiving, love is always looking out to complete what is missing in the beloved.

Many Men today are living in a fake life because they were told ' its a man's world' where the man is always in control

Your sweet husband can never inspire you or help you achieve greatness, if your husband does not understand what it really means to Great or to share in Greatness.

The fact today is that many see their wife as just a mere commodity or contract partner they paid for and not as a true friend / best partner in Success / best partner in failure

I have seen a handful of men who have been true to themselves and to their role as husband, or friend and I will always respect them for the brave choices they made in their life to be good for the sake of being good, to a true friend rather than being a boss, even if society tears itself apart with vice and male dominance.

As it is today, Marriage has been bastardized, Family has lost its true meaning, its values and 'togetherness' as it is supposed to be. Most people today are just trying to patch it so it does not fall apart openly in public.

The rate of domestic violence inferiority complex against married women in Nigeria, the rate of divorce, the rate of heart breakers, the rate of immorality amongst guys and gals, married and unmarried makes me wonder what this generation is turning into.

True Love is actually dead ....as far as I am concerned unless you can prove me wrong otherwise with your good behaviour which I know can also be faked.

Most men on the street today toasting girls are just catching fun for the sake of it or rushing off to catch a sweet apple so they can quickly answer the name 'Married'

But the reality of it is that the Marriage they think is an easy stuff is more than an Encyclopedia which one needs to study carefully before getting into it. They are acting a script they were already told that ' its a man's world' . The woman has no right to know where you have been all day. The woman has no right to follow you all day.

And as they bounce into marriage ---they will soon bounce out of it when they are tired even if they are the best of celebrities that people admire.

Sometimes I think it's better not to get married at all in the first place than to live in this false 'shell' called marriage.

I can't imagine myself staying 1 minute away from my true friend, the one whom I entrust my heart to. Forget about what the world wants to say. its 'our' life not 'theirs'.

Better not to give my heart away at all (remain Single forever) than to give it to someone who cannot take good care of it and motivate me to succeed as I constantly motivate her.

The Best way to live life, i think should be to be yourself and keep doing good, be smart and don't get carried away by first impressions of beauty, wealth, sweet talks etc. All that glitters is no longer gold.

The best way to live life is to train yourself to tolerate any kind of person (personality types) as long as you have built your strong heart, with a patience and sweetness that can change even the worst of men into your best buddy. But that does not mean you should just accept anyone that comes your way. If you can't change their attitude, values and view about life before marriage, then you will have to live with it for the rest of your life or join the popular club called 'divorced' .

Alternatively if you have have built yourself up with a strong heart and values to tolerate any kind of person, you stand a better chance of being able to patiently and carefully convert that person into the type of person you want ....but you may need to learn a lot about human psychology (what makes people act the way they act).

From my experience in dealing with people, i've learnt that those who prove to be wicked or tough on the outside are really very weak inside (its just an outer covering they are displaying - defense) as a result of the type of harsh environment /wisdom they grew up in , the over expression of love received (betrayed love) or absence of love (no one to share or truly care) and their system has naturally built its defense wall...(wickedness / fear me) ..to change that attitude in them you have to be extremely careful before you can earn their trust as a good friend (who is not self seeking, earthly reward seeking, one who is your friend because he wants what is best for you even if he or she is not a part of your life or happiness, they still help you gladly to find your happiness) and then you can gradually dismantle that outer shell so it becomes easier for them to accept other people the way they are..(without feeling that all are the same - bad ).and now they are free to look out for or help others achieve their goals in life .....its a mindset thing that you can with patience and wisdom change gradually as I did with one of my bosses at work. If you are obeying them now out of respect, ok...but how long with that continue... they will continue to act that way towards you forever unless you do something about it .

Have you ever seen two good friends arguing about which important assignment they will do first. A says to B ----lets us do your own; assignment first before we start to do mine later. B says to A ----No! lets us do your own assignment first before we start to do mine later.

That should be the ideal character of true friends, a man and woman who truly love each other and want the best for each other. But when you love or marry someone who sees your interests as inferior, then you have to spend the rest of your life doing his own assignment since he doesn't see the need for your own assignment.


As of now all they see is 'Me', My World, My Happiness, My Satisfaction. And even if you are legally or rightfully married to them...they do not see 'you' in their inner world and so their attitude is to always think about 'Me' . Even ladies too can exhibit this attitude which usually leads the guy to frustration or to seek love elsewhere.

Young boys or girls like me still searching. Don't loose hope - the good guys and good girls still exist but it may take time to find. Don't be carried away by this thing called 'love'. it kills. sweet talks...or toasts....its bitter in the end.....You need time and wisdom to look carefully, look carefully and look beyond the surface and determine if that guy really means what he is saying, if his mouth and his heart mean the same thing.....or he just wants to cover up and use you as he has done with so many. Or he just wants to use you to climb up to the next stage in his life 'Married' even if both of you are not compatible, or he just wants to keep you at a corner as a full time house wife or sx satisfaction machine.

Anyway I think you should hide your heart far far away in a safe place as you listen to their toasts so that anyday you happen to find that true man (whom you have tried and tested to prove he is original) you can dust it up and both of you can start a good life together ...

Truckpusher:
Absolutely sure of course.
Go on and catch fun ,don't just get pregnant for an ugly dude and pass it on to me
Me no want bastard in me house.

*hands her one carton of durex*

Tashamania:


LMAO. Thanks, I'll really need it




you are such a clown

Truckpusher:
You're welcome .
please help me tell your girlfriend that I'd be home alone tomorrow.


Me clown?

Tashamania:




I'll tell them threeso.me, huh?

Truckpusher:
Three ? I'm not planning on dying yet.

Oh! I forgot that you're not equal to the task ahead.
Oya make una pack come , after all birds of the same feathers flocks together they say .

carefreewannabe:


Exactly! She was given a pay raise because of her contributions and nothing else. She was given what everyone else would be given for the same performance. This is equal treatment and equity is "a situation in which everyone is treated equally". She was treated like everyone else. She did not get anything for being absent.

http://www.oxfordlearnersdictionaries.com/definition/english/equity_1

There is no need to make matters more complicated.



If she was not given any pay raise for her contribution then she would have been treated differently, unequally and THEREFORE unfairly.



If athletes had to start from the same position when running an oval field, then they would be given UNEQUAL chances and therefore treated unfairly. Because they start from different positions, they have the same distance to run, it is equal and THEREFORE fair.

Fairness and equity are therefore a result of equality.



A woman who thinks that there can be equity without equality is not logical. The example with athletes running in an oval circle is a very good example to illustrate it. They are placed in different positions so that the distance they run is equal and the outcome of this equality is equity.

Omotola should be ashamed of herself. She says she does not believe in gender equality but she enjoys every privilege that women who fought for equality gave her. I don't care what she does with her husband, she should just be aware of the message she sends to women in a country, in which females have to go to court to be included in their father's inheritance just because they are female.

ileobatojo:


The equality for all you mentioned is a 180 degree deviation from the discourse. If your goal is equality for all, how does your example of getting paid for 1 yr while you were home demonstrate that? In that time, your male colleagues were working and got paid the exact same thing you were paid for not working. Was that equal for all?

The truth is gender equality is not blanket equality. It makes provision for sound biological differences.

Kimoni:


She spent one year away from the office and was still given a pay rise like other colleagues who didn't miss a day from work? Nothing equal in that treatment IMO. Equality would demand that she spends another year to make up for lost time before getting her pay rise. Equity on the other hand considered that it was through no fault of hers that she was away from work and gave her the pay rise despite her working for one year.

Same with the oval field runners. Equality would demand that they have the same starting and finishing line. But equity dug deeper and considered the actual race each person had to run, hence, gave them different starting points. And that's what equity does in all situations, looks at inherent conditions of each player and treats you based those peculiarities.

Fairness and equity strives to achieve equality but equality will not always achieve equity. True equality will not cherry pick you know. Whatever a man is allowed to do, a woman should also be allowed to do and vice versa. that's equality if I understand you guys right and I tell you it's a receipe for disaster. I see women who want to go out topless because men walk shirtless. Is that sane? In summer, I will never allow my teenage daughter go to the park topless but I would certainly allow my teenage son. I have not treated them both equally but I have treated each with fairly.

I disagree that the great women of old were all feminist and all fought for gender equality. I would say they fought for equity, treating women fairly was their aim and not equating men and women.

A big mistake is to think that every independent, career oriented and successful woman is a feminist and that's why we think the great women of old were all feminists, it's also the same reason why you guys are disappointed with Omotola. I would say she has every reason to be proud of herself for making a huge success out of her career and family at the same time. It's a rare feat in this age, yet she is still humble enough to admit she lets her man run the show at home. She doesn't fight for equality at home.

naijababe:
I am not a fan of stereotypes, so in general I often avoid people who like to use labels. That particular trait has and I believe will continue to serve me well.

I love black men; in fact I love Nigerian men . When I was shipped to Britain at 18, I knew within a few years that nothing but a cocoa brown of the naija variety would cut it for me . Some of my friends were keen on white men because they wanted biracial kids and they supposedly make better husbands. I was having none of that, it had to be a nucca and a naija nucca for that matter, it didn’t matter if he descended from the east, west, south or sahel. All I wanted was a naija man with his usual special brand of swag and ‘toasting!’ Certain lines are particular to Nigerian men, I have not heard non-naija men use those lines

If I am interviewed today and asked what mould of men I consider Nigerian enough to be married to if I wasn't married to my true Naija hubby of course , my first answer would be King Sango of the old Oyo Empire, he may have been arrogated all sorts of mythical powers but any man who could marry women as strong as Oba, Osun and Oya was no weakling and certainly didn't need to demand respect from his wives. From contemporary times, I can only think of the Late Rev. Oludotun Kuti, husband of Mrs Olufunmilayo Kuti and father of Olikoye, Fela and Beko Kuti. Rev Kuti in particular is ultra-special because he made all his marks in education while his wife Mrs Kuti was all about politics, a mean feat for their times. The other man that comes to mind is Dr Ekpo, the husband of Margaret Ekpo; in fact the history of NCNC as a political party would not be complete if the names of these two women’s were omitted, what Mrs Kuti did in the West, Mrs Ekpo did in the East. Two strong Nigerian men married them and did not stop them from achieving dreams; the fear of their wives stealing their thunder apparently did not come into play.

The history of Babangida’s regime as terrible as it was will not be complete without mentioning Maryam’s mark. She is behind the creation of the ‘Office of the first lady’, maybe someone here can convince me that Babangida simply could not control his wife. We can't possibly have forgotten Stella and Turai so soon; strong women even if their strength was to our detriment. I have heard many oral accounts of the rifts between Awo and Akintola being largely fuelled by their wives, might have been hearsay but mama HID and late Mrs Faderera Akintola were no pushovers even if the office first lady was non existent.

The truth is that Nigerian women have always been strong and independent even if there are good and bad kinds. That some women are all about money is not new, many of our musicians sang about it, I remember the apt descriptions of some women as a kid as being 'Olorunsogo' women, but the men who coined the that term also described their opposites as 'Surulere' women.

Has the world changed so much that some of our men only want ‘yes’ women as wives? So much so that strong women can only be described as rude and disrespectful. I can’t think of anywhere else where Nigerian women in particular are bashed as they are here on NL. Some of these men need to start taking responsibility for their behaviour. You are what you attract after all.

naijababe:


Ile, my fingers are paining me o, the bolded is exactly what I have been saying now, especially the latter part of the sentence.

Truckpusher:
And you still languish in the same run down patriarchal society ?
I wonder how you guys feel when you label your own home as a rundown society.

And unfortunately when peeps like you end up being subjected to every form of racial discrimination by these your masters that you love more than yourselves you'd be the first to cry blue murder asking the Nigerian embassy to come do something.......smh

ileobatojo:


No, not really. that's not what you've been saying. You've been saying that gender equality is blanket equality which means you didn't truly understand it. But what I'm saying is that equity has essentially always been a part of gender equality.

If we go by y'all's definition of equality ie same starting line, then you're saying men and women should play on the same football, basketball, hockey teams. That's the same starting line for everyone, not so? However, this is not happening anywhere. So are you saying Sweden for instance is not practicing gender equality? What it means is, your definition is flawed.

Gender equality has always accounted for sound biological differences.

carefreewannabe:


I feel good when I speak the truth. Does the truth hurt you?




I don't feel discriminated against at all. I have a beautiful life here and I am grateful for all the opportunities Germans offered me that my own country wouldn't.

A great nation and at least 150 years ahead of Nigeria thanks to people like you.

Truckpusher:
You just spoke like a true house negro.

Mondisweets:
oya come here for examination

carefreewannabe:


Cll me whatever you want. We both know that you would prefer to be here, too.

I would rather call Merkel my master than Jonathan.

carefreewannabe:


EXACTLY!

Truckpusher:
Be where?
You must be deluded my friend.
Take a good look at me again and tell me if I'm running away from something or something is chasing me away from where I am.
Jeez......Do I look like someone that has to seek for asylum?

C'mon! don't wake me up please.

carefreewannabe:


Let us not talk about your looks.
Not interested.

Kimoni:



If you think people should be treated differently because of biological differences or whatever differences that may exist, then I wonder where equality comes in. Equality for me should not cherrypick but as soon as it starts doing that, another name should be given to the movement that adequately captures its beliefs. Your post above only just made me realize that naked feminist are not part of the real feminist movement, how was I supposed to know that when they are fighting for true gender equality as well? Where exactly is the dividing line?

Nice chatting with you anyways

Truckpusher:
obviously you need glasses, I wasn't talking about looks - it takes one mistake and all that looks becomes history.

What makes you feel that I would want to be there permanently ?

I've never intended being a house negro ,I still prefer being the field negro.