Title: bird joke

Little Johnny was sitting in class doing maths problems when his teacher called him to answer a question
http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/bird-joke.html

Title: TOP 8 LIES TOLD BY GIRLS OF NOWADAYS
1. I have a boyfriend but he is not in the
country
2. The lecturer called me but

Read more here: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/top-8-lies-told-by-girls-of-nowadays.html

Title: Tunji The Comedian
Tunji was in Abuja to see his uncle @ 8am
the secretary told him to come back by 2pm that

http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/hungry-lion.html

WICKED WISH

A bus carrying many people crashed on an icy road, burst into flames, and killed everyone. Upon arrival in heaven, God says "Since you have died in a terrible way, I'll grant you one wish before I let you into heaven

Read it here http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/the-wicked-wish.html

BULLET FOR JESUS
The two thousand member Baptist church was filled to overflowing capacity one Sunday morning. The preacher was ready to start the sermon when two men, dressed in long black coats and black hats entered thru the rear of the church.
One of the two men walked to the middle of the church while the other stayed at the back of the church. They both then reached under their coats and withdrew automatic weapons. The one in the middle announced, "Everyone willing to take a bullet for Jesus stay in your seats!"
Naturally, the pews emptied, followed by the choir. The deacons ran out the door, followed by the choir director and the assistant pastor. After a few moments, there were about twenty people left sitting in the church. The preacher was holding steady in the pulpit.
The men put their weapons away and said, gently, to the preacher, "All right, pastor, the hypocrites are gone now. You may begin the service."
HAPPY SUNDAY! SEE MORE SUNDAY JOKES

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A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner. Both he and his wife decide that they
http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/home-cook.html

Title: Funny word "panda"

A panda walks into a bar, sits down, and orders a sandwich. He eats, pulls out a gun

http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/funny-word-panda.html

stealing mother's money

Akpos was always stealing his mother's
money any where she hid it. The mother,
very confused about what to do, decided to
talk to her husband about it

http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/money-stealing-joke.html

Title travel
Little Johnny traveled North to visit his friend during winter time

http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/travel.html

title: one sunday at school

Josey wasn't the best pupil at Sunday school. She often fell asleep and one day while she was sleeping, the teacher asked her a question. "Who is the creator of the universe?" Joe was sitting next to Josey and decided to poke her with a pin to wake her up. Josey jumped and yelled, "God almighty!" The teacher congratulated her. A little later the teacher asked her another question, "Tell me who is our lord and savior?" Joe poked Josey again and she yelled out

http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/one-sunday-at-school.html

The fake promise

Akpos promised his girlfriend twenty thousand naira while chatting with her on BBM. A week later, she unexpectedly visited him while he was about to travel.
"Honey! Where's the 20k you promised me last week?" She asked.
"I don't have any money with me right now babe, but here's my ATM card. You can withdraw all the amount in my account"
He gave her his ATM card and left for Abuja, knowing fully well he had nothing in his account.
Halfway through
http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/the-fake-promise.html

Who scared pass

A husband and his wife were arguing on who is more scared between the both of them. After a long argument, they decided to ask http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/who-scared-pass.html

Who want to be a millionaire
My name is Frank Edoho from who wants to
be a millionaire, a friend of urs (AKPOS) is
on the hot seat and he needs ur help 2
answer d next question which goes for
N20M.
The voice u will hear next is dat of
your friend's:
U hv 30secs, ur time starts
now…………..
Hello http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/who-want-to-be-millionaire.html

Akpos and his friend, Kwame where coming from
school. Suddenly, they saw a burning fire. Akpos
thought of something stupid http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/funny-joke.html

Akpos and kukere were caught in a Northern
african country, sharing a smuggled
barrel of beer.
They were arrested and taken to the Sheik's
palace for questioning and judgment.
kukere lied that Akpos smuggled and forced
him to drink the beer!
Both were initially given a death sentence
but, as it was a national holiday, the
Sheik decided they should be released after
some lashes of the whip.
As they were preparing for their
punishment, the Sheik said, "It's my first
wife's
birthday today and she asked me to allow
each of you 2 wishes before your
whipping, but you cannot wish not to be
whipped!"
kukere thought for a second then said:
"Please tie two pillows to my back before
whipping."
And my second wish is that you flog me
only 20 strokes of the whip.
He was whipped, and luckily for him, the
pillows helped to make the pain of the
whip lesser.
Akpos saw this; thought for a second, then
said: "Thank you, most royal and
merciful highness for the wishes.
My first wish is to receive 100

Read more http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/smuggle-barrel-of-beer.html

Title: Funny Good dream

I was coming home one Saturday evening after a hectic day and found a small bag on the ground. I opened it and behold I found $20,000 inside the bag!
I took the bag home and when I emptied It, I found some documents, ID card, ATM card and an I-phone. I thought about throwing the SIM card away and keep the phone and also dispose the documents and keep the money.
After a long conflict with my thought, I decided to leave things as they were, hoping that the owner would call. Not long after, a call came through on the I-phone. I picked it and talked with the caller. Apparently it was the owner of the bag because
Read more: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/funny-good-dream.html

Funny never ends.............

Yusuf was given a leave from his office, so he
decided to go and spend the leave with his friend in United state of America.
On getting there, the friend took him out to see places and the last place he took him to was the zoo. In the zoo, they visited the lions' cage. Suddenly, his friend jumped inside the cage.
Yusuf, stunned, wondered why he did that perfectly, but when the lion approached his friend, he said "Bone, no flesh."
The lion was disappointed when it heard this, turned back and went to
Read more http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/funny-never-ends.html

1. HAUSA man who removed his shoes to enter a
taxi.....
2. IGBO man who went to the bank with a
spanner to open a
bank account.
3.YORUBA man who went to bed with a ruler
just to know
how long he slept
4. A TIV man who watched the news and waved
at the news reader.
5. AN EFIK nurse who woke up a sleeping patient
simply because she forgot to give him sleeping
pills....
6. AN IGALA man who
lowered his TV volume because he wanted to
read a text message..
Read more: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/who-funny-pass_27.html

POTENTIAL AND REALITY
An 8 year old son asks her dad, "What's the difference between 'Potential' and 'reality?'"
Dad turns to wife, "Would you sleep with Barrack Obama for $1 million?''
Wife answers, "Of course, I will never waste that opportunity."
Dad turns to daughter, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for $1 million?"
Daughter answers, "Yes! He is my fantasy."
Dad turns to elder son, "Would you sleep with Tom Cruise for $1million?"
Eldest son answers, "Why not? Imagine what
Read more http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/potential-and-reality.html

Akpos mistakenly sent two million naira to a wrong phone number via Mobile Money. He realized that before the person would withdraw the money, he had to think of what to do to get his money back. He immediately sent this text to the number:
"Hello Dark and Worthy Initiate, I hope you are okay, I believe you've received the money I sent you for the initiation ceremony into Eternal Mystical Order Of Glorious Satanism (EMOGS) in the Ogboni Fraternity scheduled to happen at midnight tomorrow. That money is only for transport, I will send you more for pocket money and there are riches awaiting you.
"Two weeks after the initiation, your closest family member will die mysteriously and this death will unlock your ticket to wealth, ability to fly at night and change into all kinds of animals to deliver your various assignments. Remember to carry a syringe and needle meant to draw your blood every 20 minutes. Please don't be late because the Viceroy of Satan himself will be present to
Read more of it here: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/two-million.html

Two teachers were arguing in the class and
the students were watching. Other teachers were
trooping in one after the other.
ENGLISH TEACHER: What a pugnacious
and combatant fight teachers maneuvering
themselves in the presence of their pupils.
CHEMISTRY TEACHER: Stop this now or I'll balance your equation with acid and base.
MATHS TEACHER: please please stop before I
divide and subtract your names from our teachers read more here http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/11/funnys-teacher-joke.html

A Polish man, a German guy, and an American dude, climb a mountain because they each want to make a wish from the genie on the top. When they make it to the top, they find the lamp and all rub it. The genie appears and says, "For your wish to be granted, you must yell it out while you are jumping off of this mountain." So the German jumps off and yells, "I wish to be a fighter plane!" "So be it," the genie says, and the German becomes a plane. The American jumps off and yells, "I wish to be an eagle!" "So be it," the genie says, and the American becomes
Read more http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/funny-joke-update.html

Three friends went to China for a vacation. They lodged in a five star hotel. They ended up being on the sixtieth floor. The policy of the hotel was that, at midnight, the elevator is always shut down. The next day, they rented a car and explored the city. After having a nice time, they returned to the hotel fifteen minutes after midnight. The elevators had been shut down. There was no other way to get to their room except to take the stairs all the way to the sixtieth floor.
The first friend said, "For the first twenty floors, I will tell jokes to keep us going."
Pointing to the second friend, "You'll tell jokes for the next twenty floors."
Pointing to third friend, he said, "And you will also do the same for the last mile of the climb"
They started the climb. After laughing hysterically, they finally got to the last floor. When they reached the front of their room
Read more http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/funny-vacation-jokes.html

A famous inspirational speaker was speaking to
an audience and he said, "Best years of my life were spent in
the arms of a woman, who wasn't my wife. "
The audience was silent and in shock.
Then he added, "She was my mother."
Laughter and a big round of applause.
A very daring husband tried to crack this at
home. After dinner,
he said loudly to his wife in the kitchen, "Best
years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman, who wasn't
my wife."
He stood for a moment trying to recall the
second line of that speaker.
By the time he regained his consciousness, he
was http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/the-daring-husband.html

I went to a cinema with Akpos, on getting to the cinema we saw a bald guy, I showed the guy to Akpos and said "Look at fresh head, this one is good to slap, but I'm
afraid of the guy's face".
Akpos then said to me "Ofego, you fear a lot, I will slap that head and nothing will happen".
I dared him to do it and he went to where the guy was sitting and gave him a HOT SLAP on his head. The guy was surprised, and wanted to react, then Akpos said "Bros
Osofia, so you are here, and we have been looking for you at home!"
The guy responded "I'm not Bros Osofia, maybe we look alike", Akpos murmured "maybe."
After some minutes In the cinema, Akpos called me again and said "Ofego, I will slap that guy again and nothing will happen." I answered "ok"
He went to the guy, gave him a hot slap and
Read more http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/funny-cinema-joke.html

funny three friend joke

Once upon a time there are three friends living together as one, but their aim was to complete the mission

Read more so funny http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/funny-three-friend-joke.html

A girl was passing by and saw her boyfriend, Akpos standing by the ATM.
She immediately hid and sent a romantic text to him, "Honey if you are sleeping right now, send me your http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/atm-girl.html

Title: Final exam joke



Akpos and his best friend Eazy sat in the exam room to write their final year exam. Eazy had studied very well for the paper while Akpos had not. This is what went on between them in the exam room.
INVIGILATOR: 10 mins to stop work.
AKPOS: Eazy are you done with

Very funny read more here: http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/final-exam-jokes.html

Akpos went to a bar to relax his nerves this sunny afternoon. While at the bar Akpos shouted and said to the barman; "Give me a bottle of small stout and give everybody here 2 bottles of big stout let them enjoy because when I drink stout, everybody drinks stout."
The barman obeyed people in the bar started hailing Akpos while sipping on their free drinks.
Akpos ordered again "Barman! Give me a bottle of small stout and give everybody here 2 bottles of big stout let them enjoy because when I drink stout, everybody drinks stout".
Everybody cheered and hailed Akpos louder. After some minutes again Akpors said "barman give me a plate of fish pepper-soup and give everybody here two plates of fish pepper-soup each, let them eat while I eat".
They were so happy and heaped praises on Akpos while they ate and drank.
About an hour later, Akpos beckoned on the Barman and said to him, "Bring me my bill and also give everybody here their bill too because when I pay my bill, everybody will pay their bills too!"
Please help save Akpos who is still lying unconscious at the intensive care unit of General Hospital in Lagos.
http://sholaqozeem..com

Police officers were at a road block. One of them stops a trailer:
POLICEMAN: Where is your permit?
DRIVER: (Hands in his permit)
POLICEMAN: Do you have an extinguisher?
DRIVER: Yes, its there…
POLICEMAN: Light up your indicators.
DRIVER: (Light his indicators)
POLICEMAN: Do you have a seat belt?
DRIVER: Yes, I have.
POLICEMAN: Hunk your horn let me hear.
The driver hunks his horn. The policeman turns to his fellow officers and says the man has everything and they decided to let him go.
As the driver was about to drive away, one of the police officers suddenly shouts:
POLICEMAN: Is your SIM-card registered?
DRIVER: (Completely surprised) No.
POLICEMAN: Park! Park there!!! How can you drive without registering your number? What if you are involve in an accident, how will we identify you?

Two teachers were arguing in the class and
the students were watching. Other teachers were
trooping in one after the other.
ENGLISH TEACHER: What a pugnacious
and combatant fight teachers maneuvering
themselves in the presence of their pupils.
CHEMISTRY TEACHER: Stop this now or I'll balance your
equation with acid and base.
MATHS TEACHER: please please stop before I
divide and subtract your names from our

Read more http://sholaqozeem..in/2014/12/teacher-joke.html