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Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now - Family - Nairaland

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Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years / Reasons Why Most Marriages Fail In Nigeria / Arranged Marriages Were Better Than Modern Marriages. (2) (3) (4)

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Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by dammyjay93(m): 7:44am On Nov 27, 2014
Good Morning N'anders, wishing y'all a lovely morning and day ahead.

Now to the Discussion of the day :

In the Past, marriages were most often pre-arranged by families with LITTLE or no emphasis on love or dating but then marriages lasted more but nowadays that people are freer to choose and even date for extended periods, the rate of divorce is so high.

Why is this? Let's discuss

5 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Nobody: 7:52am On Nov 27, 2014
The difference is social media. There were lots of divorce too but there was no means of transmission of the news of divorce.

The very reason Islam promote illiteracy amongst women is to make sure women remain loyal to men, so was it those days, because men refuse to train their daughters too, out of ignorance and dependence on men as bread winners, but now women have equal opportunity to get education and work to earn a living, so women can decide to divorce at will, for "irreconcilable differences".

Love isnt a good reason to get married, not then, and not even now, because love is unlimited in nature, it can be depleted, but friendships keep unions strong after the diffusion of love.

93 Likes 6 Shares

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by pryncemautin: 7:52am On Nov 27, 2014
The simple answer is technology



So this post finally made FP lipsrsealed


Now I can read d post
Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by KanwuliaJara: 7:53am On Nov 27, 2014
Lie!
Na the same!
Welcome to FACEBOOK! kiss

2 Likes

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by kadas01(m): 8:02am On Nov 27, 2014
Those days, moral values were upheld and maintained, but these days, moral values have declined so badly, coupled with negative external influence mostly copied from the western world!

18 Likes 1 Share

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Nobody: 8:10am On Nov 27, 2014
internet
Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Lordabas: 8:26am On Nov 27, 2014



because people don't know what commitment is -- they have completely bought into the concept that
"nothing matters but my personal happiness", and when things get rocky -- and they ALWAYS DO -- they decide that it is more important for them to be "happy" than to work on their marriage

11 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Nobody: 9:05am On Nov 27, 2014
Lets not deceive ourselves with this comparison. There were still divorces back then even though they were not as rampant as it is now. The fact that the marriages lasted longer then does not mean they were all happy, healthy ones. Some of them had dysfunctional families and were just merely patching up. We have people who can testify to this in their indivdual homes. These same marriages of then produced new generations with a lot more horrible mentality towards marriage thus transfering the same dysfunction from generations to generations. Now add that to the low morals of now plus marrying for flimsy reasons or to please society, then you see the product as many more dysfunctional marriages and more divorces. A good marriage of an old generation will produce sane and sound individuals with a healthy mentality towards marriage.

Lets just say that people are now more aware of what they want and would not remain in a marriage when their lives are at stake unlike that of marriages of old. Since many are marrying to please society or to fulfill righteousness then expect more divorces.

72 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by iykedare(m): 11:51am On Nov 27, 2014
Sophyrocks:
Lets not deceive ourselves with this comparison. There were still divorces back then even though they were not as rampant as it is now. The fact that the marriages lasted longer then does not mean they were all happy, healthy ones. Some of them had dysfunctional families and were just merely patching up. We have people who can testify to this in their indivdual homes. These same marriages of then produced new generations with a lot more horrible mentality towards marriage thus transfering the same dysfunction from generations to generations. Now add that to the low morals of now plus marrying for flimsy reasons or to please society, then you see the product as many more dysfunctional marriages and more divorces. A good marriage of an old generation will produce sane and sound individuals with a healthy mentality towards marriage.

Lets just say that people are now more aware of what they want and would not remain in a marriage when their lives are at stake unlike that of marriages of old. Since everybody is marrying to please society or to fulfill righteousness then expect more divorces.

These highlighted texts above gets me pissed off. Why do women feel that their happily married friends got married because of some flimsy excuses. Common!!! I m not saying that some people dont get married for whatever flimsy excuse,but WHY DO ALL YA SINGLE WOMEN BELIEVE THAT ALL YOUR MARRIED FRIENDS GOT MARRIED BECAUSE OF SOME FLIMSY EXCUSES? angry angry

10 Likes

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Nobody: 12:06pm On Nov 27, 2014
iykedare:


These highlighted texts above gets me pissed off. Why do women feel that their happily married friends got married because of some flimsy excuses. Common!!! I m not saying that some people dont get married for whatever flimsy excuse,but WHY DO ALL YA SINGLE WOMEN BELIEVE THAT ALL YOUR MARRIED FRIENDS GOT MARRIED BECAUSE OF SOME FLIMSY EXCUSES? angry angry





Did you read the Op well at all? Where did you see that in my comment? are women the only ones who marry for flimsy reasons? why turn it to a "Single ladies vs married women" thing? My comment isnt gender specific. And please, you already know about the many flimsy reasons so why are you asking me again??The thread is about why there are divorces and why the marriages of old are different from the new? and im simply stating possible causes. So? Who is introducing happily married people here?

I should have used the word "Many" instead of "everybody".

31 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by iykedare(m): 1:38pm On Nov 27, 2014
Sophyrocks:


I should have used the word "Many" instead of "everybody".

Thank you

1 Like

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Nobody: 1:42pm On Nov 27, 2014
iykedare:


Thank you

Indeed.

8 Likes

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by bukatyne(f): 3:37pm On Nov 27, 2014
dammyjay93:
Good Morning N'anders, wishing y'all a lovely morning and day ahead.

Now to the Discussion of the day :

In the Past, marriages were most often pre-arranged by families with LITTLE or no emphasis on love or dating but then marriages lasted more but nowadays that people are freer to choose and even date for extended periods, the rate of divorce is so high.

Why is this? Let's discuss

Why is what?

What are you comparing in marriages of old and marriages of now?

Keep in mind that the marriages of old brought forth the adults in the marriage of now

12 Likes

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by beeevan: 4:48pm On Nov 27, 2014
The only difference I see is that women of those days worry too much about the society 's expectations,most women now know that the society you are striving to impress don't give a rat ass, so they walk if need be. Most marriages then survived because most women had little or no choice than to keep enduring till their time on earth elapse.

31 Likes

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by teeboo: 4:55pm On Nov 27, 2014
Billyonaire:
The difference is social media. There were lots of divorce too but there was no means of transmission of the news of divorce.

The very reason Islam promote illiteracy amongst women is to make sure women remain loyal to men, so was it those days, because men refuse to train their daughters too, out of ignorance and dependence on men as bread winners, but now women have equal opportunity to get education and work to earn a living, so women can decide to divorce at will, for "irreconcilable differences".

Love isnt a good reason to get married, not then, and not even now, because love is unlimited in nature, it can be depleted, but friendships keep unions strong after the diffusion of love.

U said it all

4 Likes

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Nobody: 4:58pm On Nov 27, 2014
People often say divorces rates are high but I know more married people than I do divorced ones,

For instance only two of my classmates from university are divorced where as more than 6 of them are still married. Hell in my entire life I only know about 4 divorced people whereas I know tons & multitudes of married peeps.

Divorce rates may be high in our present day Sodom & Gomorrah (i.e the USA in my opinion) because that society is far too permissive for its own good, pedophiles will one day come out to fight for their own rights. But I doubt if the divorce rates in Naija outweighs the married rate.

I'm just saying

23 Likes

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by dammyjay93(m): 5:27pm On Nov 27, 2014
sihom:
People often say divorces rates are high but I know more married people than I do divorced ones,

For instance only two of my classmates from university are divorced where as more than 6 of them are still married. Hell in my entire life I only know about 4 divorced people whereas I know tons & multitudes of married peeps.

Divorce rates may be high in our present day Sodom & Gomorrah (i.e the USA in my opinion) because that society is far too permissive for its own good, pedophiles will one day come out to fight for their own rights. But I doubt if the divorce rates in Naija outweighs the married rate.

I'm just saying
word

2 Likes

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Nobody: 5:32pm On Nov 27, 2014
sihom:
People often say divorces rates are high but I know more married people than I do divorced ones,

For instance only two of my classmates from university are divorced where as more than 6 of them are still married. Hell in my entire life I only know about 4 divorced people whereas I know tons & multitudes of married peeps.

Divorce rates may be high in our present day Sodom & Gomorrah (i.e the USA in my opinion) because that society is far too permissive for its own good, pedophiles will one day come out to fight for their own rights. But I doubt if the divorce rates in Naija outweighs the married rate.

I'm just saying

For now they have rights in Nigeria.

14 Likes 1 Share

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Nobody: 5:35pm On Nov 27, 2014
carefreewannabe:


For now they have rights in Nigeria.

Lol!

Which one is the real sodom and Gomorrah?

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Nobody: 5:41pm On Nov 27, 2014
ileobatojo:


Lol!

Which one is the real sodom and Gomorrah?

A rhetorical question, isn't it? wink

1 Like

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Nobody: 5:49pm On Nov 27, 2014
carefreewannabe:


A rhetorical question, isn't it? wink

cheesy cheesy

2 Likes

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by sommyblaze(m): 8:12pm On Nov 27, 2014
let me consult the oracles coz this question looks like BUHARI Or should i say janja weed
Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by fittty(m): 8:12pm On Nov 27, 2014
Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Elusive9(f): 8:12pm On Nov 27, 2014
Marriages then all the way, too much book don spoil today's marriage. Women claiming equality in marriage and all dAt crap, Men being too selfish and all d craps alike. Life was less complicated back den nd dat was y dey lived long.

4 Likes

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by luvlyoracle(m): 8:12pm On Nov 27, 2014
Elusive9:
cheesy
fittty:
sommyblaze:
.
Lordabas:

Hmm
samflexxy:
internet
Nairaland embarassed
Bagani:
Following
clara472:
ok
holyboss:
.
zleemshaddy:

Nairaland new memebers u're all welcome. . .
Btw marriages of d past are mur beta dan nwaday'z marriage, TOO MUCH divorce jare
Charles4075:
+
YNeme3E:
Jj
j

2 Likes

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Nobody: 8:13pm On Nov 27, 2014
Is typing a message...
Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Charles4075(m): 8:13pm On Nov 27, 2014
+
Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Nobody: 8:13pm On Nov 27, 2014
holyboss:
.
fittty:
Elusive9:
cheesy
luvlyoracle:
smiley
sommyblaze:
.
YNeme3E:
Jj
j
Charles4075:
+




Nairaland new members u're all welcome. . .


Btw marriages of d past are mur beta dan nwaday'z marriage, TOO MUCH divorce jare
clara472:
ok
fittty:
Elusive9:
cheesy
luvlyoracle:
smiley
sommyblaze:
.
YNeme3E:
Jj
j
Charles4075:
+




Nairaland new members u're all welcome. . .


Btw marriages of d past are much mur beta dan nwaday'z marriage, TOO MUCH divorce jare angry

1 Like

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by holyboss: 8:13pm On Nov 27, 2014
Because undecided lipsrsealed

No b my mouth u go hear am lipsrsealed


Btw, Guyz check out my signature
Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by clara472: 8:13pm On Nov 27, 2014
The Type of marriage of the old lasted cause in our society then there was orderliness everyone knows their place in the family





Men And Women Were Asked Why They Really Divorced. Here's What They Said...
Source: e reporter.com.ng/index.php/more-news/life-style-news/item/1553-men-and-women-were-asked-why-they-really-divorced-here-s-what-they-said
Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Bagani: 8:14pm On Nov 27, 2014
Back in d days, women see men as superiors, but today gender equality is d headache. Before d man says 1 d woman has said 3.

2 Likes

Re: Marriages Then Vs Marriages Now by Clone2020(m): 8:14pm On Nov 27, 2014
Marriages in the olden days lasted longer because divorce wasn't accepted, if u don't like your husband anymore, tough luck you just have to tolerate him. Your parents wouldn't allow u to come back to their house and bring shame to the family.

8 Likes

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