Tolexander:


insecurity in the sense that you can't decide her response since you aren't married.

Hmm...fair enough. I guess you're of the opinion that she has the 'freedom to associate' since she ain't married yet; is this what you subtly infer?

Ladies are very complicated and unpredictable,there are times,they are meant to be blunt and straight,yet,they will be quite.
Mazi,as the master of the game,i dont expect you to fret,just lean back and see how things play.
Most long time relationship,end up being boring,making one of the partner to get out.
My advice,be ready to marry her,as soon as possible,wetin you dey wait for

Tolexander:


Remember your gf is a lady with the average feminine mind and the Pastor, a man with aboundance of masculine pranks and antics. You understand how we manipulate dem giving them the chance not to rescind our request. Just reminding you to lighten your concern.

MzPreshie:
Yeah, you're right. But since she has made the mistake of not telling the pastor outrightly that she's in a relationship, would it be better to stand him up now?

Sending her out like a sheep to go and meet two wolves; I'm sure her pastor will 'supervise' the meeting. So there's every tendency that the same 'fear' or 'respect' that made her not to tell the pastor that she's in a relationship will still be there during the meeting.

MaziOmenuko:




Sending her out like a sheep to go and meet two wolves; I'm sure her pastor will 'supervise' the meeting. So there's every tendency that the same 'fear' or 'respect' that made her not to tell the pastor that she's in a relationship will still be there during the meeting.

So what do you wanna do? Tell her not to go, and avoid her pastor afterwards?

samisparkle24:

My advice,be ready to marry her,as soon as possible,wetin you dey wait for

I don't believe marriage solves all problems, does it? A trip to the Family section will tell you otherwise. If I don't sort out issues as this during dating, how will I handle them when it comes up during marriage?
When I get married and this same pastor tells her; 'your mother inlaw is a witch' or 'come for 7 days deliverance' or 'sow a seed of 1million naira' and I'm against it, what do I do then?

Get married to her the second time

MzPreshie:
So what do you wanna do? Tell her not to go, and avoid her pastor afterwards?

Now that's a tough one.

Never thought of that.

MaziOmenuko:


Hmm...fair enough. I guess you're of the opinion that she has the 'freedom to associate' since she ain't married yet; is this what you subtly infer?

i'm sorry i had to submit the post before ending it cos of the low battery i had.

Not saying she has an absolute freedom to decide for herself. Yet you still have a limit to the control you have on her.

MaziOmenuko:


Relax and wait for the outcome? Like seriously fold my arms and wait?

Be serious nau!

Mazi I can sense your just getting emotional on this issue.allow your gf to meet with the pastor and the son.bt 1st av a one on one discusion with ur gf.

Ask ursef would I marry her?
Does she possess d qualities I love in a girl.
If yes then let ur gf inform her pastor that shez already engaged.

MaziOmenuko:




Sending her out like a sheep to go and meet two wolves; I'm sure her pastor will 'supervise' the meeting. So there's every tendency that the same 'fear' or 'respect' that made her not to tell the pastor that she's in a relationship will still be there during the meeting.

exactly the insecurity i'm talking about which dwells in you. Lol

MaziOmenuko:


I don't believe marriage solves all problems, does it? A trip to the Family section will tell you otherwise. If I don't sort out issues as this during dating, how will I handle them when it comes up during marriage?
When I get married and this same pastor tells her; 'your mother inlaw is a witch' or 'come for 7 days deliverance' or 'sow a seed of 1million naira' and I'm against it, what do I do then?

Get married to her the second time

No matter how long you date,you will never know her. Once you are married you will see new her.
As the husband,if you told her not to go,i bet you,she wont. Right now,you dont have authority over her.
Do you think,you are perfect or she likes everything about you. Its a sacrifice,my brother.

MaziOmenuko:




This seem to be the popular opinion. Good if you'd ask me; but why honor a meeting you already know its agenda and that you're going to give an unfavorable response? Would have been better if she told her pastor she's not interested and safe the 'son' from traveling down from wherever he's coming down from.

I quite understand your point but telling the pastor an outright No can bring some issues because the pastor may quickly change the purpose of the meeting if he feels the lady will expose him so the lady will have herself to blame for being took quick to resolve the reason , let her pretend as if its a casual meeting of a christian brother for missionary works
.......Wisdom is the Principal thing .

To me no man has a right to influence a girls' choice of a spouse , fine the man might be led by the spirit but he's only there to confirm her choice not choose for her .

xynerise:

The number of years you date a person doesn't guarantee you will marry him/her.

100percent correct.You can date for 8years and never marry a lady while someone will date her for just 6months and marry her .

Tolexander:
exactly the insecurity i'm talking about which dwells in you. Lol

Lol...you really have to redefine this insecurity so I'll understand it better.

Does caring and protecting the one you love count as insecurity too?

samisparkle24:

Do you think,you are perfect or she likes everything about you. Its a sacrifice,my brother.

I don't believe anyone is perfect. We just try to change the ones we can change and learn to live with the ones we can't.

MaziOmenuko:


Lol...you really have to redefine this insecurity so I'll understand it better.

Does caring and protecting the one you love count as insecurity too?

nobody is killing or harming her, why the protection and care?

Allow her 2 go cus u ar not yet hers untill u pay her bride price

xynerise:
People, especially ladies always succumb to tricks like this. She fears that she might be disobeying the Holy spirit through the pastor if she doesn't do as told. Crap!! Ladies will never learn. The said "son" and the pastor are "paddy paddy", unless of course the pastor has seen it that you (Mazi) will make a terrible husband and tries to rescue her . Aside that, this is pure brainwashing.

Your girlfriend believes her pastor's choice might be the best but her love for you is just holding her for a short time, unless you slap her out of hypnosis.

It is not too late to inform the pastor she is already engaged, that is if you are even serious with her.

God bless you... I was gonna ask that. @OP, are you serious with her? if yes, propose. The pastor hasn't done anything wrong.

MissShakira:
Allow her 2 go cus u ar not yet hers untill u pay her bride price

Seriously? So if the 'son' promises her marriage, she should go baa?
No wonder some guys use marriage to deceive you all. Tell you what you want to hear and get what they want.

Tolexander:
nobody is killing or harming her, why the protection and care?

Lol...more like 'marking your territory'

MaziOmenuko:




Lol...more like 'marking your territory'

marking your territory jealously?

Mazi I dont think what ur girl did is wrong, for me since d pastor did not say dt d son is coming 4 rlship but marriage n u expect d girl to say dt she is in rlship when actually u've not told her dt u r going to marry her, what if u disapoint her @ d end. Let her see d son who knows he might be d man God kept 4 her but if u really want to marry her plz make a move, time waits 4 no man.

Sharksblow:

God bless you... I was gonna ask that. @OP, are you serious with her? if yes, propose. The pastor haven't done anything wrong.

Seems so many people believe in proposal and marriage rather than relationship.

Tolexander:
marking your territory jealously?

You prefer I mark it violently?

mazi that ur gurl done go...........she done go.


Ladies prefer these pastors with hypnotic lips. She will say yes to that guy........its has happened before so many times with so many ladies dumping so many guys.

Its over!

MaziOmenuko:


You prefer I mark it violently?

why bro?

The lady must be virtuous for you to think of jealously guarding her?

mencade4:
mazi that ur gurl done go...........she done go.


Ladies prefer these pastors with hypnotic lips. She will say yes to that guy........its has happened before so many times with so many ladies dumping so many guys.

Its over!

Lol...talk of being pessimistic; how are you so sure?

You're talking like you've had a first-hand experience.

with all your great n awesome sexual sexcapes, i can't believe you don't know what to do right now Mazi......

well, the fact that she refused to tell the pastor about her relationship is already a RED FLAG!.....maybe she has doubts about her relationship with you...... i think she's trying to keep her options open.......have a long talk with her and find out what is really on her mind.....if she's serious about you, then, let her call her pastor and inform him about her relationship with you ASAP!

btw, Oga Mazi, there are ladies who believe so much in their pastors that they would be willing to do anything as far as it pleases their Pastor(s)......People ate GRASS(ES) cos of ''PASTOR''.....i just hope for your sake bro, she ain't one of em.........All da best mate........Peace....

With all your great n awesome sexual sexcapes, i can't believe you don't know what to do right now Mazi......

well, the fact that she refused to tell the pastor about her relationship is already a RED FLAG!.....maybe she has doubts about her relationship with you...... i think she's trying to keep her options open.......have a long talk with her and find out what is really on her mind.....if she's serious about you, then, let her call her pastor and inform him about her relationship with you ASAP!

btw, Oga Mazi, there are ladies who believe so much in their pastors that they would be willing to do anything as far as it pleases their Pastor(s)......People ate GRASS(ES) cos of ''PASTOR''.....i just hope for your sake bro, she ain't one of em.........All da best mate........Peace....

In as much as i agree wid you on the fact that, she should have told the pastor she is already engaged......i also think she was quite confused and didnt see that coming.

Well, she has already agreed to meet the pastors ''son''.
The next move i think is:

she should put shyness aside and be bold when she meets d pastors ''son''. No need being confused abt this. She is engaged and its as simple as that.
She shouldnt give d pastors ''son'' any hopes of meetn him again.
I think that will help.

if i be you i go just tell my girl to call the pastor right there in my presence and tell him i cant come because am already taken.

if you let her go, when she come back her character will change even if she refuse.

Nigerians and the so called respect we have for these fake men of God, When Baba sit down jejelly for upstairs, dem carry fone call him, e enta voicemail, stil yet they will go on brainwashing people. It sucks

ritababe:
if i be you i go just tell my girl to call the pastor right there in my presence and tell him i cant come because am already taken .

if you let her go, when she come back her character will change even if she refuse.

There is nothing like 'taken' until marriage.

fragilegal:
In as much as i agree wid you on the fact that, she should have told the pastor she is already engaged......i also think she was quite confused and didnt see that coming...

The op never said they are engaged.