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5 Ways You Are Unknowingly Destroying Your Husband And Killing Your Marriage - Family - Nairaland

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5 Ways You Are Unknowingly Destroying Your Husband And Killing Your Marriage by drakeskull(m): 9:59pm On Dec 13, 2014
You might be surprised to figure out you are doing these five destructive things that will ultimately ruin your relationship with your spouse.

Here are just a few ways you might be unknowingly destroying your husband and killing your marriage (as a caveat, please understand that although this article is directed toward women, it applies to men as well):

1. Living outside of what you can afford

A wise old woman from my church congregation once advised: "The best thing you can do as a wife is to live within your husband's means."

Wives, show sincere appreciation and respect to your husband by carefully following a budget and making the most of what you have. Be wise about your finances.

Constantly complaining about not having enough to fulfill your lavish desires or racking up astronomical amounts of debt on your credit card is a poor way of saying "thank you" to a faithful spouse who works hard every day to provide for the family.

Yes, you may not have enough to buy that Kate Spade bag you've had your eyes on for months, but your husband will love and appreciate the fact that you honor him and are grateful for what he provides.

2. Constant negativity

You hate your hair, the messes around the house, the neighbor across the street, your dumb co-worker, the old dishwasher, and everything in between. As soon as your husband walks through the door, you launch into action and dump every negative and angry thought that's crossed your mind throughout the day.

Can you imagine having to carry that burden? Negativity is draining. Men like to fix things, and constantly being hounded with complaints makes it difficult for him to help solve your pains.

If there is one thing I've learned from marriage is that a good man wants you to be happy, and if he can't help you do that, it makes him unhappy. It's okay to have a bad day once in a while, that's totally understandable, but don't make it a way of life.

3. Putting everything else first

When your children, mom, best friends, talents, or career in front of your husband, you send a clear message to him that he is unimportant. Imagine having that message sent to you every day for many years. What would that do to your self esteem?

Put your husband first.

Although it sometimes seems counter-intuitive and counterproductive, I think you'd be amazed to find that it's often the key to the greatest happiness in marriage. So many couples get divorced these days, because they neglect to care and love one another and put each other first.

If you choose to put each other first, you will find a lot of joy.

4. Withholding physical affection

Men crave and need physical affection with their wives. When you constantly decline intimacy, it wears on them.

Sex should not be used as a tool to control your spouse; it should be viewed as a sacred tool to draw you closer to one another and to God.

It is a great blessing to be wanted and needed by a loving, romantic husband who wants to share something so beautiful and important with you -- and you only. Even though you might not always be in the mood, it's worth it to give in (when you can) and spend that time bonding.

5. Not speaking his language

Women love to drop hints. (I think it's part of our DNA.) But men just don't get them. (I think that is a part of their DNA.)

Don't waste your time giving subtle hints that he won't understand: Speak plainly to him. Be honest about your feelings, and don't bottle things up until you burst. If he asks you what's wrong, don't respond with "nothing" and then expect him to read your mind and emotions. Be open about how you really feel.

http://familyshare.com/marriage/5-ways-you-are-unknowingly-destroying-your-husband-and-killing-your-marriage

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Re: 5 Ways You Are Unknowingly Destroying Your Husband And Killing Your Marriage by waleadex(m): 10:02pm On Dec 13, 2014
This write-up will surely help...nice one op!
Re: 5 Ways You Are Unknowingly Destroying Your Husband And Killing Your Marriage by holatin(m): 10:04pm On Dec 13, 2014
Nice write up
Re: 5 Ways You Are Unknowingly Destroying Your Husband And Killing Your Marriage by thegoodone2(m): 10:05pm On Dec 13, 2014
good
Re: 5 Ways You Are Unknowingly Destroying Your Husband And Killing Your Marriage by Adeoba10(m): 10:18pm On Dec 13, 2014
Incase
Re: 5 Ways You Are Unknowingly Destroying Your Husband And Killing Your Marriage by justcallbuki(f): 10:55am On Dec 14, 2014
aiit.... I will amend my ways
Re: 5 Ways You Are Unknowingly Destroying Your Husband And Killing Your Marriage by AndreRose(f): 2:53pm On Dec 14, 2014
Am liking dis write up
Re: 5 Ways You Are Unknowingly Destroying Your Husband And Killing Your Marriage by anthoniaz(f): 3:00pm On Dec 14, 2014
I'm learning smiley
Re: 5 Ways You Are Unknowingly Destroying Your Husband And Killing Your Marriage by sexybash(f): 3:44pm On Dec 14, 2014
Not fucking him properly grin angry sad
Re: 5 Ways You Are Unknowingly Destroying Your Husband And Killing Your Marriage by Nobody: 7:01pm On Dec 14, 2014
They cant help doing all those things. It is partially in their DNA, and partially imbibed irreversibly from Mills & Boon (now obsolete), African magic and Telemundo.
Re: 5 Ways You Are Unknowingly Destroying Your Husband And Killing Your Marriage by petikal(m): 11:21pm On Dec 14, 2014
The woman who understands and consciously applies 75% of these will undoubtedly tap into his man's widest dreams. I'm still looking for her. grin

About men loving to fix things, yes we do, but I'm discovering sometimes women just want us to listen!
Re: 5 Ways You Are Unknowingly Destroying Your Husband And Killing Your Marriage by Janet101(f): 1:15am On Dec 15, 2014
Thanks for dis tips, but I feel wen it comes to marriage, I think men should learn to listen n also stop cheating. I don't have any problems wit ur tips but after everything he will still date some unknown characters.

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