Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,143,477 members, 7,781,392 topics. Date: Friday, 29 March 2024 at 01:44 PM

Adjusting To Life As A Widower - Family (40) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Adjusting To Life As A Widower (122427 Views)

Poll: How has this thread helped you to appreciate your spouse better and positively affect your relationship?

Very Positive: 90% (9 votes)
Good: 0% (0 votes)
Fair: 10% (1 vote)
Not Really: 0% (0 votes)
Not At All: 0% (0 votes)
This poll has ended

Man Bounces Back To Life After Three Days In Morgue (Photo) / Getting Married To A Widower / Adjusting To Parenthood (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) ... (37) (38) (39) (40) (41) (42) (43) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 6:14pm On Sep 23, 2016
Jumaii:


Yes sir. I'll be brief. I was in a toxic relationship for months and I endured cos we have a child together. It got to a point that I couldn't take it anymore (I was emotionally and physically abused) and we separated.

It's almost a year after our separation and I am still yet to come to terms with the fact that it's over even when He has seemingly moved on without even looking back. It's just so difficult for me, I still have his thoughts every now and then.

Even as I type, my heart is so heavy and I am swallowing hard. It feels like there is this heavy stone on my chest. It's just so painful.

Sis it is well
God is in all we do and go through and though it is very painful now, put your trust in Him and He will surely give you cause to smile again.
It is painful I know, but God will replace beauty for ashes
Try and do things that take your mind off things
You can consider a hobby of some sort
or even volunteer somewhere
Get out there and live again please
your kid needs you to be happy for him/her to be happy too
It is well my sister

3 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 9:41pm On Sep 23, 2016
tearoses:


Sis it is well
God is in all we do and go through and though it is very painful now, put your trust in Him and He will surely give you cause to smile again.
It is painful I know, but God will replace beauty for ashes
Try and do things that take your mind off things
You can consider a hobby of some sort
or even volunteer somewhere
Get out there and live again please
your kid needs you to be happy for him/her to be happy too
It is well my sister
God bless you for sparing time to offer these soothing words. I appreciate sis.

1 Like

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 10:29pm On Sep 23, 2016
tearoses:


This babe fine gannnnnn kiss
Serubobo you are blessed
BTW Its CC lipsrsealed

I know it's you cc. How are you and yours? Long time no hear.
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Analytical(m): 1:33pm On Oct 27, 2016
serubawon:
Sorry all for the silence. A lot was going on. However, I'm pleased to inform everyone that Olori and I got married today August 11 2016. It's been a very long journey for both of us and also since this thread began. Just like all good stories, they finally come to an end and this is the end of one story and the beginning of another.

Heartfelt appreciation to those that made this thread so wonderful. It was a special project that still endures. From Olori and I.............. God bless you all!!!!!!

Hmmm! You mean all these have happened? What a never-ending story that is ever new! I opted out of Nairaland for about 3 years now and what a pleasant news that forced me out of “retirement”!

Truly, “we are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed” (1 Cor 4 vs 8 )! What more shall I say? “But thanks be to God who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ” (1 Cor 15 vs 57). What a journey of patience and perserverance! What a journey of trials and temptations! I salute your courage to forge ahead. I salute your resolve to stay focused. I salute your tenacity to hold on to hope when there was none. I salute your brokenness to let go, so you can let in!

In life, things happen that make us wonder why. This is a lesson that ultimately, if we don’t give up, He makes all things work together…for our own good. The experience may not be pleasant. It may not be all rosy. It may not be smooth. It may be full of thorns and thistles. Friends, at the end, they all work together …for good! Though the sorrows may last for a night, joy certainly comes in the morning! Serubawon and Olori, welcome to your morning!

This is wishing my friend Serubawon and Olori (what an olori!) all the best there is. You certainly deserve it. I have no doubt in my mind that you have both been moulded and shaped in the furnace. It is therefore time to glow with brightness and radiance.

Happy married life!

Analytical

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Mimzyy(f): 2:15pm On Oct 27, 2016
His (Uncle Serubawon) is a very inspirational story...

2 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 2:23pm On Oct 27, 2016
prittigrrr:
My fiance is a widower. I am divorced. I told him on our 1st date that I loved married life but had a bad marrige. He told me he knew nothing of a bad marriage and had only known happiness and love. I respected him from that second on. He told me problems he had with the grief of his child. I told him to please be careful and choose a loving woman who could be sensitive and attentive to the needs of the child and to him. He had been alone for 5 years and had not dated much. He had told his family that he would never marry again. Very shortly thereafter he proposed marriage to me. We are planning our wedding and life together now. We've been dating for 9 months and are still meeting each others friends and families. Life is sweet and I am looking forward to mothering his daughter and loving him.

wowwwwwwwwwww !

2 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Bisjosh(f): 8:31pm On Oct 27, 2016
Just here to read and learn

1 Like

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Fejok01(f): 3:07am On Oct 28, 2016
Life of a widow is so frustrating. Even in church, they look down on you as if you become a widow by choice. I pray the God that settled Serubawon will settle us too in Jesus name. I'm so sad right now.

7 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by lawlahbammy(f): 4:42am On Oct 28, 2016
Fejok01:
Life of a widow is so frustrating. Even in church, they look down on you as if you become a widow by choice. I pray the God that settled Serubawon will settle us too in Jesus name. I'm so sad right now.
.

My sister may God Almighty grant all your desires. The Lord is your strength.

3 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Winneygirl(f): 4:53am On Oct 28, 2016
@Analytical, it's been a long while. Good to know you're doing alright.

1 Like

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by heavenlychy: 9:31am On Oct 28, 2016
Awww...I feel blessed to have encountered this thread. Its so inspiring and it has given me a lot to be grateful for. My mum died when I was 7years which was year 1997. I have 3 younger siblings before she died. infact, she died 3months after the birth of our last girl. My dad never remarried. He took care of us and even when he travelled out for greener pastures, he still paid the bills and focused on making us better. Its 2016 now and he came back home. I guess now he's in a better place with his emotions and all. He's falling head over heels in love again and even though at first it was odd for us his children, we now understand his pains as a widower and give him our full support. He's 50years and we cant stop thanking God for his faithfulness in his life as we sometimes watch him and his fiancee play away like kids. smiley

14 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 1:11pm On Oct 28, 2016
Fejok01 , just came in to drop a word of comfort to you. May God comfort, uphold and bring you another bone of your bones (right partner). Its not easy. A lady lost her hubby too of about 5years only. I was only able to imagine the pain and loneliness. Its well with widows/widowers. God bless and give you guys your heart desires.

3 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Fejok01(f): 8:35pm On Oct 28, 2016
Thanks @lawlahbammy and loisemm. God bless the two both of you (In Jenifa's voice)

4 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by lawlahbammy(f): 8:40pm On Oct 28, 2016
Fejok01:
Thanks @lawlahbammy and loisemm. God bless the two both of you (In Jenifa's voice)
You're welcome ma.
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by bellong: 9:47pm On Oct 28, 2016
Fejok01:
Life of a widow is so frustrating[b]. Even in church, they look down on you as if you become a widow by choice. [/b]I pray the God that settled Serubawon will settle us too in Jesus name. I'm so sad right now.

If I were you, I will find a Bible believing church. You need to change where you worship if they behave this way, it only shows their shallow understanding of life and the scripture, I wouldn't want to be part of such congregation.

However, many widows and widowers don't find joy and happiness again because they refused to let go of the loss. It is difficult I know but it is what you have to do to be free and happy.

Open your heart while guiding it jealously against those who may want to take advantage. You will find a good man with time and remember God makes all things beautiful in His time.

It is well with you

7 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by delpee(f): 10:34pm On Oct 28, 2016
serubawon:
Sorry all for the silence. A lot was going on. However, I'm pleased to inform everyone that Olori and I got married today August 11 2016. It's been a very long journey for both of us and also since this thread began. Just like all good stories, they finally come to an end and this is the end of one story and the beginning of another.

Heartfelt appreciation to those that made this thread so wonderful. It was a special project that still endures. From Olori and I.............. God bless you all!!!!!!

Congrats to you and Olori! HML

2 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 9:04pm On Oct 29, 2016
Congratulations Sir @Serubawon.

4 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 11:59pm On Nov 16, 2016
zionx:
Congratulations Sir @Serubawon. Your story has been a source of inspiration to me. I pray that God will strengthen me also and my story will end on a positive note. My husband passed on few months ago. It hasn't been easy but God has been faithful.

I'm so sorry for not responding immediately. I was out of town on official business and couldn't really effectively monitor this thread while I was out.

You said your husband passed on a few months ago. I'm truly sorry for your loss and I believe that the Lord Almighty will comfort you and bring you to where He wants you to be. I know that sounds impossible right now, but believe me, in time, He will. If you think you can, please share your story with us. If you can't bring yourself to do that right now, I understand. If God could bring me to this point of being happy again, He can do even more for you. Hope to hear your story.
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 12:00am On Nov 17, 2016
Analytical:


Hmmm! You mean all these have happened? What a never-ending story that is ever new! I opted out of Nairaland for about 3 years now and what a pleasant news that forced me out of “retirement”!

Truly, “we are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed” (1 Cor 4 vs 8 )! What more shall I say? “But thanks be to God who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ” (1 Cor 15 vs 57). What a journey of patience and perserverance! What a journey of trials and temptations! I salute your courage to forge ahead. I salute your resolve to stay focused. I salute your tenacity to hold on to hope when there was none. I salute your brokenness to let go, so you can let in!

In life, things happen that make us wonder why. This is a lesson that ultimately, if we don’t give up, He makes all things work together…for our own good. The experience may not be pleasant. It may not be all rosy. It may not be smooth. It may be full of thorns and thistles. Friends, at the end, they all work together …for good! Though the sorrows may last for a night, joy certainly comes in the morning! Serubawon and Olori, welcome to your morning!

This is wishing my friend Serubawon and Olori (what an olori!) all the best there is. You certainly deserve it. I have no doubt in my mind that you have both been moulded and shaped in the furnace. It is therefore time to glow with brightness and radiance.

Happy married life!

Analytical

Thanks my brother. Nice to hear from you again. How have you been?
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 3:39am On Nov 17, 2016
**

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Goodhart(f): 6:02am On Nov 17, 2016
wooow!!!
congrats uncle serubawon and Olori. HML
i have being following this thread since 2013
and it helped me tru my stormy periods too.

thank GOD for a happy ending and a beautiful
beginning, *****na twins we want ooo****LOL

may God strengthen everyone going through
any form of pain, heartbreak or set back.

Who has the FINAL say

Surely, The LORD of LORDS, JEHOVA has the final say!!!!!

All will be well.

1 Like

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by sisisioge: 7:55am On Nov 17, 2016
zionx:

Thanks for your response Sir. My husband was an officer and died early this year in Borno State. He was killed by Boko Haram. We were married for less than two years. It has not been easy coping but God has been faithful. I'm standing strong for the little baby he left behind and I am looking forward to inspiring someone through my story later in the future too.

Omg! Zionx darling...I'm so sorry. So very sorry. May the God of Zion show you and yours mercy. Thanks for being our hero...your sacrifice will not be in vain. Pele...the Good Lord will take care of you and yours and make you smile again. Pele.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 9:03am On Nov 17, 2016
..
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 2:35am On Dec 24, 2016
Goodhart:
wooow!!!
congrats uncle serubawon and Olori. HML
i have being following this thread since 2013
and it helped me tru my stormy periods too.

thank GOD for a happy ending and a beautiful
beginning, *****na twins we want ooo****LOL

may God strengthen everyone going through
any form of pain, heartbreak or set back.

Who has the FINAL say

Surely, The LORD of LORDS, JEHOVA has the final say!!!!!

All will be well.


Thank you so much.

1 Like

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by kaziblake(f): 3:22pm On Dec 24, 2016
Hmmm this thread actually brought tears to my eyes..my mum is a widow and I know how it feels..
May God console us all..Zionx take heart dear
God knows best

4 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Marvel1206: 12:03am On Dec 25, 2016
I just spent 6hours reading through 39pages. I'm just short of words. Really insipiring!
Serubawon, you tried!
Merry Christmas!!!

4 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by Nobody: 2:02am On Dec 25, 2016
...
Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by keenn: 7:38pm On Dec 26, 2016
despite being an agnostic i have both consciously and unconsciously exclamated 'my God!'while reading through this thread.

i have never sat down with my hand held device to read through over 30 pages painstakingly, never.

started yesterday and done today, and i can boldly say this is the best thread ever... have sent already the link to my closest friends.

thanks so much to all that have participated over the years.

it was worth it.

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 8:01pm On Jan 08, 2017
Marvel1206:
I just spent 6hours reading through 39pages. I'm just short of words. Really insipiring!
Serubawon, you tried!
Merry Christmas!!!

Thank you. I might have tried, but without His grace, I would have failed woefully... God's grace is always sufficient......... for everyone.

2 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 8:04pm On Jan 08, 2017
keenn:
despite being an agnostic i have both consciously and unconsciously exclamated 'my God!'while reading through this thread.

i have never sat down with my hand held device to read through over 30 pages painstakingly, never.

started yesterday and done today, and i can boldly say this is the best thread ever... have sent already the link to my closest friends.

thanks so much to all that have participated over the years.

it was worth it.

To God be the glory. grin

2 Likes

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by prittigrrr(f): 6:47pm On Jun 06, 2017
I was just thinking of all my friends on this thread. I hope all are well, especially Serubawon and Olori!

1 Like

Re: Adjusting To Life As A Widower by serubawon(m): 10:44pm On Jun 21, 2017
prittigrrr:
I was just thinking of all my friends on this thread. I hope all are well, especially Serubawon and Olori!

My sister from another mother. How are you and hows the family doing? We're doing great. Olori and the kids are keeping me on my toes on a daily basis. I'm sorry for being away for so long. My work schedule is crazy busy and every once in a while when I check the site, I'm off it pretty quickly when I don't see a comment.

Abeg, give me gist......How are you doing jare?

2 Likes

(1) (2) (3) ... (37) (38) (39) (40) (41) (42) (43) (Reply)

Man Shares Picture After First Sex With His Virgin Wife (Viewers Discretion) / 17-Year-Old Boy Buys A Car For His Mother In Lagos. See Reactions (Photo, Video) / Concern As More Us-based Nigerians Murder Their Spouses

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 63
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.