The exams went on slowly than I had anticipated. I was just half way through but I was already tired of it. Since Bauchi left, the house had become boring. Kiki was hardly out of her room. Ezekiel was always beaming with excitement, he even had the guts to organise a Saturday fellowship in my house. I missed Bauchi.
Every time I tried to talk to the beautiful girl sitting two rows away, my heart beat clouded my courage; she looked too exquisite for my poor mumblings to make sense to her. Last week, I made up my mind to approach her after the paper, I wore the best shirt I had, sprayed some puffs of Kiki’s perfume. She didn’t show up. She wasn’t offering that subject.
I spotted the Benz drive into the compound, I saw her beautiful hair sheen through the glass, an ache for what I wanted but could not have gripped my soul. As usual she lingered in with the driver for a while before she stepped out of the car, she was wearing an armless gown, with hips that a girl below 20 shouldn’t have.
I counted from 10 backwards and imagined Bauchi was with me and wondered what he would have said if I told him I was scared to talk to a girl. He would definitely have said I was the weakest man since General Diya begged Abacha to spare his life. He hated Oladipo Diya.
As I walked up to her, my heart beat increased, I started perspiring, it was so unlike me. I had no issues like this before. The closer I got to her, I decided that I was just going to keep walking but something happened, I could swear I heard Bauchi say ‘self-servicer’ in my heart. What the hell, after the exams I would probably never see her again, I had nothing to lose.
“Hello, I am Fifi,” I said with hands stretched.
She looked at me with her big brown eyes and smiled.
“That is a peculiar name, are you Ghanaian?”
This is very embarrassing but I should tell you that she left my hand hanging. We were standing in the middle of the compound, under the blistering sun but she didn’t seem to notice, I was beginning to sweat.
“No, I’m Nigerian”.
She smiled and started walking away. After going that far, I wasn’t about to let her slip away.
“You haven’t told me your name,” I said trying to sound offended but making a bad job of it.
She stopped abruptly.
“Look Pipi...”
“It’s Fifi,” I corrected her.
“I really don’t go for the bullshit, you don’t want my name or need it. All you want is to fvck me and show me off to your peers that you have a fine babe, for 3months...3years...?”
I stammered.
“Ermmm, that is not...”
“It is not what? You need my name so we can be friends, because we have everything in common, and we would discuss about music, economy and when I am broke, you will buy me phone units and valentine, I would buy you boxers and singlet?”
“You are wrong,” I replied.
“I am wrong, you don’t want to fvck me?”
She was more beautiful with the ‘I’m talking to an idiot’ expression on her face.
“Not that, I want to fvck you very much but first, I want you to like me”.
Her eyes widened in surprise then she started laughing, I laughed in return until she stopped abruptly.
“Don’t ever talk to me like that again or I will report you for sexual harassment,” she said with a stern look.
I was confused and was finding the perfect reply when she walked into the hall.
I tried to focus on the exam I was writing but I couldn’t, I kept looking at her and how unpredictable and hot she was. Because of her, I could finally push out the thoughts of a heavily pregnant Oge out of my mind. Truth be told, I wasn’t thinking about fvcking her, kissing her had crossed my mind a couple of times but not fvcking her, even when I masturbated, it was with the former thoughts of Oge or Whitney Houston or Tyra Banks, never her.
I gave up ever talking to her again, the sexual harassment brouhaha was enough for me, so after the exam I embarked on my usual stroll to the Estate. Command day secondary school was to my right, it was in the Ojo military cantonment said to be one of the biggest in Africa, all the way from Volks bus-stop to Iyana Iba.
The robberies that occurred along the axis, usually at night wasn’t unconnected to the young guys who took their father’s guns and attacked commuters in traffic or in their homes. Whenever I passed by the school, I walked faster than normal.
“Pipi!” a voice shouted, I wouldn’t have turned if it wasn’t familiar. It was the girl, my new miss world. The Benz stopped in front of me, this time she hopped out faster than normal. To my surprise the driver drove off.
“I didn’t see you standing at the corner as you do every time, waiting for me to pass after my exams,” she said, coming so close to me, I could see the pores on her skin.
“So you noticed?”
“Of course I noticed that you drooled whenever I walked pass you like I was virgin you wanted to devour”.
“I am sorry for the harassment,” I said smiling.
Thankfully, she got the joke and smiled.
“I am short of friends now so there is a vacancy for you, still interested?”
“but I never said I wanted to be your friend,” I replied.
“True, you said you wanted to fvck me till my brains spilled out, right?”
She was gorgeous as fvck!
“I want to be your friend”.
“Good, we are in the same page”.
“I am Fifi not Pipi by the way, what is yours?”
“I am Abibia, but friends call my Abi,” she said
“Nice to meet you, Abi,” my hand was stretched.
She ignored it.
“So we are clear, I have a boyfriend and I love him very much,” she said.
My happiness went from 100 to 0.
“Two, I don’t like touching people, especially their palms, its disgusting”.
I started wondering.
“Besides that, I am the best kind of friend you can ever have,” she said smiling with eyes that Angelina Jolie would be jealous of.
“Oh I see”
“So will you still be my friend, to rant and to gist with, for gossips and hangouts till betrayal do us part?”
I looked at her lovely frame and once again, I concluded that I had nothing to lose.
“For a thousand years,” I replied.

Slimzjoe:

Any idea about when David Will return

go ask olashas na she go knw

Cool

Onemansquad:

go ask olashas na she go knw

Come Read.... David has Dropped another ! ;o

Slimzjoe:


Come Read.... David has Dropped another ! ;o

Thanks a lot

davidflo, I'm begging you not to go on any leave for nau, because this tori too sweet for you to abandon.... God bless you

Hmmmmn... Thanks 4 the update. Buh, we gat 1 person to thank 4 it. The power of a woman.



Standd.
Ose maami.

olashas:

Thanks a lot

Ola dearie..I miss you.
Been stalking you

standd:


Ola dearie..I miss you.
Been stalking you

Lies from the pit of hell

olashas:

Lies from the pit of hell

*sobs*

I don't lie on Sundays biko

standd:


*sobs*

I don't lie on Sundays biko

You just did


How are you jor?

olashas:

You just did


How are you jor?

Not fine, I want my olashas back

standd:


Not fine, I want my olashas back

Well, i don't want you.

You signed the divorce papers. Remember?





Don't kiss Davidflo until he makes 2 or 3 updates

olashas:

Well, i don't want you.

You signed the divorce papers. Remember?





Don't kiss Davidflo until he makes 2 or 3 updates

What can I do? I really miss you.


I don't intend to kiss anyone with this virgin lips of mine. If he likes, he should update 200times in 1hour self

Amusaopeyemi:

You say whaaaaaaaa??

pls can I get d link too d story pls I tried opening dis one dey said it's not available

standd:


What can I do? I really miss you.


I don't intend to kiss anyone with this virgin lips of mine. If he likes, he should update 200times in 1hour self

Airbournelacer or whatever his name is has to go .



You have to kiss him when he updates o . Else, the next update might be next year

I wish it is this easy to gain the attention of all those ajebuter children... Chai I just remember what a daughter oF a general did to me(bella)

Standd & Olashas una weldone oh..



Abibia that kinda lady that will keep u floating Ad-INFINITUM. Davidflo thanks for d update

olashas:

Airbournelacer or whatever his name is has to go .



You have to kiss him when he updates o . Else, the next update might be next year

Lol you guys have to pay for the kisses oh. I don tire for davidflo, I swear. He does not care about his kisses na, I'm tired of wasting kisses and he will still update once in a year

standd:


Lol you guys have to pay for the kisses oh. I don tire for davidflo, I swear. He does not care about his followers na, I'm tired of wasting kisses and he will still update once in a year

BeeBeeOoh:
Standd & Olashas una weldone

olashas:

You are laughing at me?

standd:


You are laughing at me?

Yes

olashas:

Airbournelacer or whatever his name is has to go .



You have to kiss him when he updates o . Else, the next update might be next year

Airbornelacer??
You want him to go?
But I him oh

olashas:

Yes

Ok oh

Try and love me back sha, I have begged you enough na

standd:



Airbornelacer??
You want him to go?
But I him oh

You don't miss me then

standd:


Ok oh

Try and love me back sha, I have begged you enough na

I can't love one who loves another

olashas:

I can't love one who loves another

I'm out of this thread forever...
How can you reject my love in public Olashas.
Fear God oooo

standd:


I'm out of this thread forever...
How can you reject my love in public Olashas.
Fear God oooo

Crazy girl





You better come back. We need more updates

Babe tracking mode

Pipi come and continue oh

Onyeval212:
Labaski

wetin happen