taryour:
Its so easy for some men here to type and say its no big deal about it,now here is for the men.


Now assume its vice versa, your wifey invites and old male friend whom you know very well cause he arrived very late at the airport and to late to get an hotel to spend the night. With your consent you agreed for him to spend the night in your house.

Next morning you wake,have your bath and breakfast,ready to go out only to find your car key missing,you ask wifey and she says " oh honey Jide took it out,will be back soon. Dint want to disturb your sleep "

WHAT WILL YOU DO

Hug your wife and give her a pat on the back and say " no problem honey "

LOLz!

bukatyne:


Women 'cherish' their kitchens, men 'cherish' their cars

Hope you don't mind when a colleague of your wife's decide to drive it out without your permission as the perfect host.

these two cases don't relate bukky. Women cherish their cars too. Besides you can't drive a car without someone's permission except you stole their keys.

Peeps please continue with the opinions

bukatyne:


Chaircover,

I hate to be a spoil sport but you have been going round and round in circles since the last thread.

Others have dropped their opinions and this thread is for you to do same and not tell us how your kitchen operates.

Dami gave a wonderful scenario of her mom who had to sleep in someone's house she never met. Imagine you were her in that scenario, could you have entered the Arab's kitchen to cook the next morning without permission?

Simple yes or no.

Funny how the people saying those that mind are KKK etc. have not told us if they will do same as in an unknown host's house... or how they are 'reserved' and wouldn't do such.

First of all I don’t have to answer your Yes or No questions . . . .
I’ve done more than answer them yesterday and given you examples.

This is yet another thread on this forum and I can choose to say anything I like so long as its on topic and not insultive.
. . . .Especially as the reason why you opened the thread is not because you genuinely want to learn anything . . Your mind is already made up, hence the thanking people who agree with you, but arguing with people who don’t.

So yes, I can describe how my kitchen works if I want to . . Someone likes the concept even if you don’t The thread is about kitchens is it not?

I used to think you as a fair babe, but I am kind of surprised at your utterances . . I know you will say that you don’t care LOL.
Nairaland!

Not it doesn't make you any less Yoruba at all

chaircover:
Cococandy you said it all.
It’s not a matter of right or wrong . . .It’s a matter of different and that is what I am trying to get across and I gave a true working example of what happens in my home which works for me, but is different to some other peoples.
Does that make me less of a Yoruba woman?
Does that make me ill mannered?
Buky wants to prove that she is right . . .Yes she may be . . but that right line ends outside my own front door and that is what she needs to understand.

1. No, I don't enter other people's kitchen unless they invite me to.

2. I would not mind if I woke up to find my guest in my kitchen. I would only ask if she/he needs my assistance with anything.

The only sanctuary I have is my bedroom. I don't allow anyone in unless you are family.

chaircover:
Cococandy you said it all.
It’s not a matter of right or wrong . . .It’s a matter of different and that is what I am trying to get across and I gave a true working example of what happens in my home which works for me, but is different to some other peoples.
Does that make me less of a Yoruba woman?
Does that make me ill mannered?
Buky wants to prove that she is right . . .Yes she may be . . but that right line ends outside my own front door and that is what she needs to understand.

And go all the way to prove the " rightness " too. A supposed opinion poll where people who respond how she likes are told " thanks" and those who differ are grilled to the point of being called liars.

cococandy:
these two cases don't relate bukky. Women cherish their cars too. Besides you can't drive a car without someone permission except you stole their keys.

How don't they relate

We keep the car keys on the center table....

What stops our guests from driving off in it to get something from a supermarket

bukatyne:


How don't they relate

We keep the car keys on the center table....

What stops our guests from driving off in it to get something from a supermarket

ngwanu I don't know what else to say.

I just know that it is not the same thing. A car can be caught in a crash or have a problem along the way which would be more problematic for the owner if he or she wasn't the one driving at the time.

My own is you said women value their kitchen and men their cars. Well I'm not sure I value OUR kitchen more than my hubby does since we both spend considerable time in it.
I don't even value it more than I value the living room.

bukatyne:


How don't they relate

We keep the car keys on the center table....

What stops our guests from driving off in it to get something from a supermarket

Becasue they are not insured to drive any of the cars, so they just cant just "borrow" the cars.
. . . .and to add more pepper into the soup, not all men are hooked up on their cars.
I driver a newer and better car than my hubby . . He bought it by the way.
Why? . . . becasue he said, rather he broke down and had to waiting on the side of the road for assistance than me and the kids and according to him, we come first in his life
So here is another example of something else that is "Wrong" by some peoples standards but works fine for us even though you didnt ask me the question

I'll not cook in a stranger's house without permission because of how I was brought up. Even with my siblings you've got to ask for their permission before you can use their things.

I won't mind my new guest going into my kitchen. Am quite open minded, I know people are brought up differently. So to them it could be normal. Some might even decide to clean the kitchen as appreciation to you for hosting them.

bukatyne:


Without your permission?

Then why would you not do that in a guest's house?

Not saying, it 's bad, want to understand.

I didn't even remember the insurance part.

Bukky if you're not insured to drive a car and you do, if you have a crash in it, big problem on top wahala and casala.

Not the same thing at all.

chaircover:


Becasue they are not insured to drive any of the cars, so they just cant just "borrow" the cars.
. . . .and to add more pepper into the soup, not all men are hooked up on their cars.
I driver a newer and better car than my hubby . . He bought it by the way.
Why? . . . becasue he said, rather he broke down and had to waiting on the side of the road for assistance than me and the kids and according to him, we come first in his life
So here is another example of something else that is "Wrong" by some peoples standards but works fine for us even though you didnt ask me the question

LadyX:
I'll not cook in a stranger's house without permission because of how I was brought up. Even with my siblings you've got to ask for their permission before you can use their things.

I won't mind my new guest going into my kitchen. Am quite open minded, I know people are brought up differently. So to them it could be normal. Some might even decide to clean the kitchen as appreciation to you for hosting them.

My dear, the guest in question was their family friends girlfriend, who agreed they had never met, but they were familiar with the family friend who they had let spend the night with them.
This was the morning after.
Didnt they gist and discuss and get to know one another the night before?

chaircover:


First of all I don’t have to answer your Yes or No questions . . . .
I’ve done more than answer them yesterday and given you examples.

This is yet another thread on this forum and I can choose to say anything I like so long as its on topic and not insultive.
. . . .Especially as the reason why you opened the thread is not because you genuinely want to learn anything . . Your mind is already made up, hence the thanking people who agree with you, but arguing with people who don’t.

So yes, I can describe how my kitchen works if I want to . . Someone likes the concept even if you don’t The thread is about kitchens is it not?

I used to think you as a fair babe, but I am kind of surprised at your utterances . . I know you will say that you don’t care LOL.
Nairaland!

Easy now...

This is an opinion poll thread and if you have none to give, why bother posting?

You answered yesterday? LOL! LOL! LOL! Simple yes, I will cook in an unknown guests house or no I will not, I have not seen. Maybe you answered other questions not mine. Everyone (even those who do not see the importance of the thread) have been able to give a yes or no even if a detailed explanation followed. YOU on the other hand did not answer any of the questions.

Stop twisting facts to suit your point; I said thanks to people for and against especially the first posters. Coco does not mind and I told her thanks; some others too. I am yet to see people I argued with. I asked a lady who was no & yes why she would not do so and did not ask Coco because she has stated a reason why.

In this thread, I do not know how your kitchen works fit in as you have not given an opinion; the reason this thread exists is because of the dynamics of the relationship here. If your sis or friend or in-law came, don't you expect them to cook for the whole family if you are around to do so?

You keep saying as far as you can trust someone & invite them over.. did the host know the guest talkless of inviting her?

You must be a mind reader to know whether I have learnt something or not on this thread... remind me to book for your services later.

Thank God you know I do not care what you think. Those who know me will say I am fair (even if I am chocolate complexioned )

On a serious note, Ive said all I want to say on this thread.
No right!
No wrong!
Just Many Shades of Grey
Live and Let Live
Lets Learn to embarace difference in opinion with an open mind and without jabs
EOD!

aisha2:


And go all the way to prove the " rightness " too. A supposed opinion poll where people who respond how she likes are told " thanks" and those who differ are grilled to the point of being called liars.

Aisha,

I am trying to avoid a fracas...

Do you have proof of this?

Did I not tell Coco thanks? Does she agree with me?

Easy now

chaircover:


My dear, the guest in question was their family friends girlfriend, who agreed they had never met, but they were familiar with the family friend who they had let spend the night with them.
This was the morning after.
Didnt they gist and discuss and get to know one another the night before?

I saw the other thread.
I think the problem started when the lady host formed a negative opinion of the friend's girlfriend. She said she looked at her like a "small girl". That means they did not even socialize to get to know each other well.

If I were the host, I would have welcomed the lady, and told her to feel at home. Before going to bed i'd have told her "If you need anything don't hesitate to tell me" or "feel free to take what you need". To me, you need to spend even just 5 minutes before going to bed to easy tension and make a guest feel welcome.

bukatyne:


Aisha,

I am trying to avoid a fracas...

Do you have proof of this?

Did I not tell Coco thanks? Does she agree with me?

Easy now

Who are you telling " easy now"? I am not your child oh, you cannot determine my comment or response to any post madam. Find someone else to be condescending towards abeg, not me.

bukatyne:


Aisha,

I am trying to avoid a fracas...

Do you have proof of this?

Did I not tell Coco thanks? Does she agree with me?

Easy now

Who are you telling " easy now"? I am not your child oh, you cannot determine my comment or response to any post madam. Find someone else to be condescending towards abeg, not me.

bukatyne:


Without your permission?

Then why would you not do that in a guest's house?

Not saying, it 's bad, want to understand.

bukatyne:


Women 'cherish' their kitchens, men 'cherish' their cars

Hope you don't mind when a colleague of your wife's decide to drive it out without your permission as the perfect host.

Yes and Yes.

These questions are hilarious. I remember once i went to my good friend's house to visit. So after gisting, she asks if i want to eat anything cos she wants to put her daughter to sleep and it is usually a long and tedious process. I told her not to bother that i would make myself at home. I jejely made small fried rice for the two of us to eat cos she had said she was hungry earlier. When she returned, she went ballistic. I thought it was cos i made fried rice not white or jollof and she said i had no right cooking in her kitchen. I was shocked to my marrow. This is someone that we used to sleep on the same mattress and eat from the same pot in school. In fact, i stayed in the hospital with her when she wanted to give birth for a day before her mum came to join her. I apologized profusely but i was still so shocked. It thought me a lesson. I don't assume everyone is like me. I will always ask before i enter the kitchen of another woman.

Another example was a relative that came to visit for a while. In my house, in the evening, everyone finds what they will eat if not na eba and soup. I told her there was food in the freezer so she can warm up anything whenever she was hungry. I showed her to the biscuit cabinet and drinks and (in my mind) made her feel at home. This was during a work week. Her mum called me 2 days later and said her daughter was only eating breakfast but no other meal. I was shocked to say the least. I make breakfast and lunch which we take to work/school so i expected her to warm up food as there was always soup or stew or make anything she wants for lunch. The babe will eat only the breakfast and not eat again till the next day cos i didn't come home from work to warm food for her or cut her portion. I was just weak. Even the househelp gets to eat whatever she wants no restrictions so why should she restrict herself?

Thank God for my family.

bukatyne:


Hope you read the OP

Your wife can enter your friend's kitchen she has not met before without their permission like '...'oh, nice to meet you Mrs. P, please feel free to make breakfast etc. etc.'

Read the OP.

Continue to rule over your kitchen
Soon people will come and visit you with their own pots and pans

No be small opinion.

Madam na Bush woman.
The husband had already told her about the guest, why would she now start dragging kitchen with the guest.

So the guest should wait for her to wake up by 8 o'clock before she eats something. On top Wetin na. Wey hunger dey catch her
As a guest I could have endured but not everyone can. What if the guest has ulcer and needed to make a quick fix for herself and wouldn't want to wake up madam

pickabeau1:


Continue to rule over your kitchen
Soon people will come and visit you with their own pots and pans

Bad mouth.!

cococandy:
I didn't even remember the insurance part.

Bukky if you're not insured to drive a car and you do, if you have a crash in it, big problem on top wahala and casala.

Not the same thing at all.

No problem Coco,

I have no problems with differing opinions, I was seeing women are protecting their territory etc. etc.

It is all good

cococandy:
Well I'm not sure I value OUR kitchen more than my hubby does since we both spend considerable time in it.
I don't even value it more than I value the living room.

I agree with this. I don't value my kitchen in any special way. Like you said, my husband spends as much time as me, if not more in the kitchen. You can't throw a stone and find a single guest of mine that has not used the kitchen in my house. The kitchen is not 'my kingdom', so all the male mad dogs with alternate agendas that have been barking can continue raving all day and night if they like.

This issue is simply a matter of etiquette and how different people will respond if one breaks that.

If the girl in the story was a friend, I'm sure we would all be unified in insulting the madam but this is a complete stranger, an unwelcome one at that. And it has nothing to do with her poisoning your food either. She doesn't need to cook anything to poison food. It's all about etiquette.

blank:
Yes and Yes.

These questions are hilarious. I remember once i went to my good friend's house to visit. So after gisting, she asks if i want to eat anything cos she wants to put her daughter to sleep and it is usually a long and tedious process. I told her not to bother that i would make myself at home. I jejely made small fried rice for the two of us to eat cos she had said she was hungry earlier. When she returned, she went ballistic. I thought it was cos i made fried rice not white or jollof and she said i had no right cooking in her kitchen. I was shocked to my marrow. This is someone that we used to sleep on the same mattress and eat from the same pot in school. In fact, i stayed in the hospital with her when she wanted to give birth for a day before her mum came to join her. I apologized profusely but i was still so shocked. It thought me a lesson. I don't assume everyone is like me. I will always ask before i enter the kitchen of another woman.

Another example was a relative that came to visit for a while. In my house, in the evening, everyone finds what they will eat if not na eba and soup. I told her there was food in the freezer so she can warm up anything whenever she was hungry. I showed her to the biscuit cabinet and drinks and (in my mind) made her feel at home. This was during a work week. Her mum called me 2 days later and said her daughter was only eating breakfast but no other meal. I was shocked to say the least. I make breakfast and lunch which we take to work/school so i expected her to warm up food as there was always soup or stew or make anything she wants for lunch. The babe will eat only the breakfast and not eat again till the next day cos i didn't come home from work to warm food for her or cut her portion. I was just weak. Even the househelp gets to eat whatever she wants no restrictions so why should she restrict herself?

Thank God for my family.

Blank, welcome

This opinion poll is not about friends or people you know, please read the OP or tell us an instance where something similar to the OP happened and let's discuss

@ the scenarios above,

1. Your friend is if she calls you her friend, she should appreciate your help. I would have done same in your shoes

2. Your relative is : She really expects you to come back from work and cook for her? And the mother could call you to discuss that?

Different strokes for different folks

pickabeau1:


Continue to rule over your kitchen
Soon people will come and visit you with their own pots and pans

And foodstuff sef

Simple yes or no, you cannot answer yet you are trolling the thread.

Infact sef, they must bring mattress

LadyX:
I'll not cook in a stranger's house without permission because of how I was brought up. Even with my siblings you've got to ask for their permission before you can use their things.

I won't mind my new guest going into my kitchen. Am quite open minded, I know people are brought up differently. So to them it could be normal. Some might even decide to clean the kitchen as appreciation to you for hosting them.

Thanks for your reply

I get you now...

taryour:


Now assume its vice versa, your wifey invites and old male friend

This story ended at this point, for me. He won't be taking my car because, he won't be coming to my house because, my wife would not...oh, never mind.

aisha2:


Who are you telling " easy now"? I am not your child oh, you cannot determine my comment or response to any post madam. Find someone else to be condescending towards abeg, not me.

Should tell you the bolded

@ My posts: I asked lady X a question and you call that argument?

Did Pickab drop an opinion or a snide remark?

Timbuktou:
This story ended at this point, for me. He won't be taking my car because, he won't be coming to my house because, my wife would not...oh, never mind.

Hmmm

Welcome dear.
When you complete the polls post the results.

bukatyne:


Thanks for your reply

I get you now...