Lateralmaths:
this thread was created to address wives. Another thread also addresses husbands to love unconditionally.

in as much as I admire your desire to counsel people to have succesful marriages by insisting that the woman be submissive and the man love unconditionally, I would like to point out to you that your expectations are impossible.

The hearts of humans is inherently selfish; and asking one partner to submit without limit and expecting the other to be true and just and not take advantage of the situation becomes an impossible concept.

In my opinion, marriage needs love and respect from both parties to grow. That is what makes it a partnership.
The concept of demanding total submission from the one and then exhorting the other to love without reserve is equal to saying marriage is meant for the gods alone. Cos neither the man nor the woman can achieve that kind of perfection.

Mytwocents.

donpeey22:
In case you don't know, when someone is the head, leader or 'administrator' of a home that person calls the shots and makes decisions in the home. Mere 'recognizing' that someone is the head of a home can't equate to submission.

A president is the head, leader, and administrator of a country - he does not call all the shots or make all the decisions.

Mere recognizing that someone is the head of the home can't equate to submission because that's not the definition you like - you prefer the intelligent/dummy definition you've been going on about.

To answer your question, yes it is possible for two people to jointly own and manage an institution equally provided there's a set rule governing such partnership by which both partners must abide, and which will determine who makes what contributions in the partnership.

It is impossible, but I wasn't expecting you to type otherwise at the risk of digging holes in your own argument.

Ezeanna:


in as much as I admire your desire to counsel people to have succesful marriages by insisting that the woman be submissive and the man love unconditionally, I would like to point out to you that your expectations are impossible.

The hearts of humans is inherently selfish; and asking one partner to submit without limit and expecting the other to be true and just and not take advantage of the situation becomes an impossible concept.

In my opinion, marriage needs love and respect from both parties to grow. That is what makes it a partnership.
The concept of demanding total submission from the one and then exhorting the other to love without reserve is equal to saying marriage is meant for the gods alone. Cos neither the man nor the woman can achieve that kind of perfection.

Mytwocents.

the foundation is God. with God all things are possible.

crackhaus:

A president is the head, leader, and administrator of a country - he does not call all the shots or make all the decisions.

Mere recognizing that someone is the head of the home can't equate to submission because that's not the definition you like - you prefer the intelligent/dummy definition you've been going on about.


It is impossible, but I wasn't expecting you to type otherwise at the risk of digging holes in your own argument.

I asked u a question which you have not answered. We agreed in one of my posts that submission in marriage means one partner yielding to and being led by the other, and I asked to what does the submissive partner yield if not to the decisions of the other.
Your analogy with the President can only be acceptable if you agree that a woman can as well become the leader of the home same way she can be elected president of the country.And mind you, a good President does not and should never expect total submission from those he is leading, unless he is autocratic. And yes, mere recognition does not in any way equate to being submissive.

NickiRoman:
Wetin dey worry this one

Buhaahaha. abeg see me see wahala. Trouble sleep yanga go wake am. E dey nag all over the place.

In the bible Sarah called Abraham her lord. Is that submission?

Lateralmaths:
In the bible Sarah called Abraham her lord. Is that not submission? Women these days will say it's a master slave relationship.

Its like you are new here

The anathema here is one word that begins with S

pickabeau1:



Its like you are new here

The anathema here is one word that begins with S

I don't get you sir.

Lateralmaths:
In the bible Sarah called Abraham her lord. Is that submission?

Abraham also listened to Sarah.

donpeey22:
I asked u a question which you have not answered. We agreed in one of my posts that submission in marriage means one partner yielding to and being led by the other, and I asked to what does the submissive partner yield if not to the decisions of the other.
Your analogy with the President can only be acceptable if you agree that a woman can as well become the leader of the home same way she can be elected president of the country.And mind you, a good President does not and should never expect total submission from those he is leading, unless he is autocratic. And yes, mere recognition does not in any way equate to being submissive.

Whatever works for you bro...

Cheers!

Ewuro4:


Very true.

But today's women mistook 'stoop' for being 'stoopid'.

lol stoopid

Lateralmaths:
I don't get you sir.

You will get it soon

anthoniaz:
Be submissive, pamper him(he likes it when I eat with him in d morning before he goes to work as early as 5:30am, I must be the one to wear him his socks, I must hug him before he leaves e.t.c), always do the things he likes, keep the house clean, cook good meals for him, treat your inlaws with love and respect (you must treat him with respect too )

And what do you get in return?

Or were you trained to believe that a "good" wife is one who bends over backwards to give the man everything, yet expect nothing in return for herself?

The wifes greatest weapon" is to be able to have her husbands listening ear & soft spot and she needs to find out how to do acheive that posiiton.

All men/marriages are different so she should work out what exactly "trips" her own husband

Not all men want a woman to kneel down and not all men want to be called "My Lord" and not all men want their women to go head to head with them, so what suits A may not suit B

When a wife has her husbands listening ear and his soft spot, he would want to do everything to please her and make her happy. So very early on in the relationship the woman needs to find those spots and establish her self there.

When I have time, I will post my thoughts on the "Husbands greatest weapon" thread as well.

EfemenaXY:


And what do you get in return?

Or were you trained to believe that a "good" wife is one who bends over backwards to give the man everything, yet expect nothing in return for herself?

stooping to conquer. The aim is to conquer him (to find his mumu button,and knowing how to press it).

blublahd:
what if it affects the financial stability of the family and invariably you are required to contribute more and more and more at which point he is now broke?

Are you insinuating that the working wife should spend her hard earned money to act / become the "safety deposit box" of the man's extended family? Despite her fully shouldering the responsiblity 100% of her nuclear family?

And what would the broke ärsëd nigger be doing in the meantime? Acting the "head" and directing her on how and what to spend on his family while she submissively complies without a squeak?

This is unbelievable. Nigerian women in Naija don suffer.

chaircover:
The wifes greatest weapon" is to be able to have her husbands listening ear & soft spot and she needs to find out how to do acheive that posiiton.

All men/marriages are different so she should work out what exactly "trips" her own husband

Not all men want a woman to kneel down and not all men want to be called "My Lord" and not all men want their women to go head to head with them, so what suits A may not suit B

When a wife has her husbands listening ear and his soft spot, he would want to do everything to please her and make her happy. So very early on in the relationship the woman needs to find those spots and establish her self there.

When I have time, I will post my thoughts on the "Husbands greatest weapon" thread as well.

I agree with you ma. Every woman find your man's soft spot (warri people call it 'mumu button') and establish yourself there.

pickabeau1:


You will get it soon

ok I am waiting.

Lateralmaths:
stooping to conquer. The aim is to conquer him (to find his mumu button,and knowing how to press it).

And what does stooping mean to you?

Why must she "stoop" to get across to him? Is she his inferior?

Lateralmaths:
ok I am waiting.

OK.

EfemenaXY:


And what do you get in return?

Or were you trained to believe that a "good" wife is one who bends over backwards to give the man everything, yet expect nothing in return for herself?

EfemenaXY:


Are you insinuating that the working wife should spend her hard earned money to act / become the "safety deposit box" of the man's extended family? Despite her fully shouldering the responsiblity 100% of her nuclear family?

And what would the broke ärsëd nigger be doing in the meantime? Acting the "head" and directing her on how and what to spend on his family while she submissively complies without a squeak?

This is unbelievable. Nigerian women in Naija don suffer.

EfemenaXY:


And what does stooping mean to you?

Why must she "stoop" to get across to him? Is she his inferior?

It's much too early to be antagonizing, misinterpreting, and making use of sensationalism in an attempt at passing a cliche point.

What is your own opinion regarding the topic?
What is a wife's greatest weapon?

EfemenaXY:


And what does stooping mean to you?

Why must she "stoop" to get across to him? Is she his inferior?

Efemena mavo? to me stooping means this

chaircover:
The wifes greatest weapon" is to be able to have her husbands listening ear & soft spot and she needs to find out how to do acheive that posiiton.

All men/marriages are different so she should work out what exactly "trips" her own husband

Not all men want a woman to kneel down and not all men want to be called "My Lord" and not all men want their women to go head to head with them, so what suits A may not suit B

When a wife has her husbands listening ear and his soft spot, he would want to do everything to please her and make her happy. So very early on in the relationship the woman needs to find those spots and establish her self there.

When I have time, I will post my thoughts on the "Husbands greatest weapon" thread as well.

Lateralmaths:
Efemena mavo? to me stooping means this

Ma rëi.

Ko bu wö?

I disagree with your concepts. Totally. The qualities you advocate for aren't wifely qualities, but those of an obedient servant.

Lateralmaths:

Ephesians 5.22-28
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,

That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.

So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.

For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

Let's assume for the sake of this argument I have no religious afflictions.

How would you level with me?

#In your own words#

EfemenaXY:


Let's assume for the sake of this argument I have no religious afflictions.

How would you level with me?

#In your own words#

What religious affiliations did our fore fathers have? we know marriages were more successful those days compared to our days.

EfemenaXY:


And what do you get in return?

Or were you trained to believe that a "good" wife is one who bends over backwards to give the man everything, yet expect nothing in return for herself?

I get everything in return.

@Lateralmaths you are a good counsellor. However there are no two methods for everyone. A collegue told me a painful story of how her brother's wife died. She was this dovey loving,submissive and humble type to the extent that she was condoning her husband's bad behaviours ;infidelity and keeping late nights even to the dismay of her MIl and Sil. She saw it as a way to get into his heart and stop his bad ways. To cut the long story short,the husband mistress killed her and now he is married to that woman.

Amhappy:
@Lateralmaths you are a good counsellor. However there are no two methods for everyone. A collegue told me a painful story of how her brother's wife died. She was this dovey loving,submissive and humble type to the extent that she was condoning her husband's bad behaviours ;infidelity and keeping late nights even to the dismay of her MIl and Sil. She saw it as a way to get into his heart and stop his bad ways. To cut the long story short,the husband mistress killed her and now he is married to that woman.

Thanks.

Like it has been said stooping is not foolishness. You need wisdom to understand what stooping is. No woman should stoop at the expense of her life.

pickabeau1:



Its like you are new here

The anathema here is one word that begins with S

I tried to warn him...

5minsmadness:



I tried to warn him...

Pls explain further

5minsmadness:


I tried to warn him...

He has been dished to a load of this weapon by our resident femmes
Maybe he will know how far

pickabeau1:



Its like you are new here

The anathema here is one word that begins with S

Submission?