Good one dear

woah!! @OP, you are soooo on point!!

The greatest problem of women not finding husband is this HOPE OF BETTER ALTERNATIVE and trust me, guys are good to see this and respond accordingly.

Ladies shd be content and simply go into relationship because of love, however they define it. Love will always be capable to culminate in marriage whereas marriage may not always be able to culminate in love.

nice one... we guys should turn a new leave o!

brito:






NA WHO BREAK YOUR HEART TO PIECES ? I PRAY YOUR HEART HEALS FAST.

Dr WHO

searching4love:
:-/

WHO CARES I PREFER ALL NIGERIAN GIRLS REMAIN SINGLE. THEY ARE THIEVES LOOKING FOR THE NEXT PREY TO DEVOUR. THEY SCAM MEN IN THE NAME OF LOVE AND MOVE ON TO THE NEXT GUY WHEN YOU PRETEND TO BE BROKE. THEY'RE NOT LOYAL. TRUE LOVE AND PERSEVERANCE IS NOT IN THEIR DICTIONARY. ALL THEY KNOW IS TO GO ON A DATE WITH A NEW CATCH AND ORDER WHAT THIER FATHER CANT BUY THEM AT HOME. THEY EAT WITH GREED AND GROW BELLIES LIKE GLUTTON. VALENTINES DAY IS APPROACHING, IF YOU DOUBT ALL I'M SAYING VISIT A NEARBY EATRY AND SEE THEM FILL THIER TABLES WITH FOODS AND DRINKS THEY CAN'T AFFORD COURTESY OF A NEW MAGA SITTING IN HER FRONT. THIEVES

Guy calm down.... seems like you've gotten the worst of it and u Are still searching for love. Better clear that mentality

Akinz0126:
Nairalanders pls help me out am in kuv with a lady that is ageing me with five years and I realy love her with the whole of my heart and she does to.

which help you need now? For you to write this comment show that you don't love the girl. Is the girls complaining.

searching4love:



Dr WHO

you sound heartbroken to me, forgive the babe pls

centjamie:


I got your point....but i still think it is more dignifying and honourable for the man to fix the bride price without involving his bride.if she wants to help,she can come in on other things.

Can this tradition still be as rigid when today more men do not have the economical power to handle the costs citing unemployment. I believe tradition should evolve and change with times. By change I mean amended to fit the state of the times and age.

Age is nothing,just numbers.

Why was this transferred to Romance section? Eww!

Sweetlemon:


Thank you o! Ever since I turned 30, I feel younger and sexier than ever! My boobs are even rounder and fuller than they were in my early 20s.

Stiff ko, strict ni.

pics or I don't believe

Woged2005:


This was my major problem too. People around called me picky but I was not. I just moved on when I found out that man was only wasting my time and trying to cash in on my age. When you meet a serious man it doesn't take forever. Things happen very fast. Two matured minds know what they want. once they meet each other they click. Even when the man doesn't have everything going, you can pool resources together to get things going. He must pay the bride price (with no assistance. It's tradition). But since you are working you can assist with wedding plans and settling down (aka housing, rent, furniture, etc)

Warms My Heart

striktlymi:
Nice post but I don't think I can stand the hassle.

Shey? All I was seeing is "don't", "can't", "is not", "not"...
It's like you're walking on a minefield.

brito:





you sound heartbroken to me, forgive the babe pls

Not heart broken. Preach to your fellow girls especially the hungry ones to desist from scamming in the name of love

Stillfire:


Can this tradition still be as rigid when today more men do not have the economical power to handle the costs citing unemployment. I believe tradition should evolve and change with times. By change I mean amended to fit the state of the times and age.

Sure.tradition is for man and not man for tradition.tradition should be flexible and not rigid so as to flow with the current trend.it should be subject to amendment(change).you are so right....i'm one of those guys that believe women should support their men financially in marriages and in healthy relationships whent they are capable,but i think it is more honourable and worthwhile for the man to fix the bride price alone without involving the woman.

Harmonyemerald:
well said. MOST IMPORTANTLY IS THE LAST POINT, a 30 year old lady is not a 22, 23 year old. At 30, her aim of entering relationship is for marriage, so after 5-6 months and you discover that she is not the one please stay away from her. DO NOT waste her time or play around or call her desperate cos u are aware of her age and priority before you asked her for a relationship. You can't eat your cake and have it, you either show and prove, if not go away.

Thats it.

searching4love:



Not heart broken. Preach to your fellow girls especially the hungry ones to desist fromn. cyccccccccyxgcycc scamming in the name of love

Abegi, make I hear word

Woged2005:

I recently posted my personal opinions on '6 reasons that keep Nigerian ladies above 30 from getting married.'

[url] https://www.nairaland.com/2130732/6-reasons-keep-nigerian-ladies [/url].

I was inundated by personal messages from people who found the post very insightful and helpful - Thanks to all of you. However, there are some people who wanted to know from the side of a lady above 30 how Nigerian brothers can better understand their ladies above 30 in relationships.

These are my personal opinions (but I was there too):

1. Don't Take Advantage Of Them: Ladies mature faster and ready to be wives and mothers at 19yrs, on the other hand economic hardship in Nigeria has moved the eligibility of most bachelors to above 30, as they struggle with unemployment and financial stability. Religious houses (specially churches) cash in on this to draw members teasing ladies that husbands are scarce. In fact, some make it look like being a single lady is a problem, a curse, and an epidemic. Unfortunately, most ladies buy this argument & become desperate, competing for the few 'scarce husbands' rather than pursue other goals. The truth is that it's better to marry at 38yrs to a responsible man and have a peaceful, mature family than rushing in at 23 with an immature boy, living in hell and abuse afterwards. Not all ladies above 30 are desperate to marry just any man. They simply want to settle down with a responsible man. Respect that & prove yourself!

2. Respect Her Time & Schedule Too: You can no longer date a responsible woman above 30 like your under-20 college sweetheart expecting her to come over to your house every weekend to cook, clean your house, and wash your clothes. At above 30+ most ladies are already working, busy and stressed out too. Some are at management positions, doing well financially too. You have to treat them with respect as partners not as your 'little girl'. You cannot shout on them or boss them around because you are a man or demand they be by your side 16hrs a day. You can't be disrespecting them in the public, pinching and slapping their behind on the streets. They are no longer teenagers!

3. It's Not About S=ex: At above 30, bones are becoming stiff. The body is no longer as flexible as that of the teenagers and under 20s, energy is wearing out too. You cannot expect to make love to her 5 times a day turning her in 7 different positions just to fulfill your fantasy at the expense of her health as you did your little girlfriend in school. Give her a break! Appreciate and understand that she may say 'No' sometimes and resist being used to experiment your new styles. It doesn't mean she's stubborn. She's mindful of her health and well-being.

4. They know What They Want: At above 30, most ladies might have been in previous relationships.They might have tasted other men and have basis for comparison. Therefore, they know when you are good or or bad in what you do. Don't take it as a criticism when they make inputs to help make the relationship better even when they try to compare you to their Exs. I know it's annoying but please understand, and pay attention to her suggestions not the man she used in comparison. We like men who listen to us. , Arrogant man is a turnoff!

5. She May Not Be A Feminist: People who say a lot have a lot to say. Sometimes it's from wealth of life experiences, though we may misinterpret them as nagging or being talkative. We learn a lot from women who teach and talk too. Except for people who argue blindly on issues they know nothing about, a lady above 30 is often educated, has life experiences, and knowledge she would like to share too. She's not argumentative, or being opinionated when she airs her views in a discussion. You may disagree with her passions but please don't shut her up, try to lord it over her or call her a 'Feminist' (if she's not) simply because she airs her views and feel passionate about them. She sees herself as a partner and you treat her like a housegirl. It hurts when you do that! As a man control the argument and close it off when it begins to drag & derail!

6. Don't Criticize Her With Her Past Mistakes: She definitely has a past, sometime not too rosy. Don't keep bringing it up, or keep using it to bring her down. Yes! Perhaps she failed in some things/relationships, perhaps married before, perhaps has a baby, perhaps had abortion as a teenager or in college, perhaps slept with a boss or pastor, etc AND SO WHAT! Mary Magdalene did yet Jesus kept her as best friend! She shared them with you to have a closure & feel close to you and not for you to bring them up and use them to judge her when you quarrel. Please never ever call a woman 'Ashawo' (prostitute). This is what you men say that hurt women most. She did what she did out of love or desperation. It's a past! Now it's all about you, give her a chance to love you.

7. Don't Waste Her Time: Finally age is not on her side; body clock is ticking, body parts have started sagging, maternal instincts have kicked in. She wants to settle down and may be impatient when you want to date her for another 3 years without taking a decision. If you don't want her for keeps please don't waste her time either. Please 6 months is enough time to decide if you want her as your wife or not.

Remember if you marry a good woman above 30 you got a Jewel! You marry a woman with maturity to handle marital challenges and mostly likely a woman most likely to bring something to the table to help both of you build a life of your dreams together.


May This Year Be A Your Year of Proposal, Marriages, Childbirths and Career Breakthroughs!!!

AMEN

WOMEN think they are the only ones interested in HUSBANDs....

I need a WIFE as well....
-a working class lady
- a presentable lady...
-height 5ft 5inch at least..or 1.7M.
-waist line 36...
-ass line 52...
-breast line 40...
-oblong head/face....
-retroverted UTERUS...
-age..b/w 22 and 26..
-fair to creamy in complexion.
-last Baby of the family precisely..
-CGPA..3.5 and above..
- a Christian ( well devoted)
-or Muslim ready to convert..
-virgin or near Virgin..
-enlightened and sociable..but prudent..
-superb medical history...
-adventurous, yet submissive...
-Minimal dependent relatives..
-comfortable family...
-genotype AA, HIV negative, EBOLA negative,
-family not more than 5siblings..with most married

DON'T BOTHER ABOUT ME...
WHEN U MEET ME , u will definitely CHERISH ME...
I have a GOOD JOB, GOOD APARTMENT, and growing in my profession.

searching4love:
:-/

WHO CARES I PREFER ALL NIGERIAN GIRLS REMAIN SINGLE. THEY ARE THIEVES LOOKING FOR THE NEXT PREY TO DEVOUR. THEY SCAM MEN IN THE NAME OF LOVE AND MOVE ON TO THE NEXT GUY WHEN YOU PRETEND TO BE BROKE. THEY'RE NOT LOYAL. TRUE LOVE AND PERSEVERANCE IS NOT IN THEIR DICTIONARY. ALL THEY KNOW IS TO GO ON A DATE WITH A NEW CATCH AND ORDER WHAT THIER FATHER CANT BUY THEM AT HOME. THEY EAT WITH GREED AND GROW BELLIES LIKE GLUTTON. VALENTINES DAY IS APPROACHING, IF YOU DOUBT ALL I'M SAYING VISIT A NEARBY EATRY AND SEE THEM FILL THIER TABLES WITH FOODS AND DRINKS THEY CAN'T AFFORD COURTESY OF A NEW MAGA SITTING IN HER FRONT. THIEVES

hey, ur vex don enter gear, though u just said reality somehow sha.

Woged2005:


This was my major problem too. People around called me picky but I was not. I just moved on when I found out that man was only wasting my time and trying to cash in on my age. When you meet a serious man it doesn't take forever. Things happen very fast. Two matured minds know what they want. once they meet each other they click. Even when the man doesn't have everything going, you can pool resources together to get things going. He must pay the bride price (with no assistance. It's tradition). But since you are working you can assist with wedding plans and settling down (aka housing, rent, furniture, etc)

God bless u for this post and topic

Op you too much. So on point

I need a WOMAN

searching4love:
:-/

WHO CARES I PREFER ALL NIGERIAN GIRLS REMAIN SINGLE. THEY ARE THIEVES LOOKING FOR THE NEXT PREY TO DEVOUR. THEY SCAM MEN IN THE NAME OF LOVE AND MOVE ON TO THE NEXT GUY WHEN YOU PRETEND TO BE BROKE. THEY'RE NOT LOYAL. TRUE LOVE AND PERSEVERANCE IS NOT IN THEIR DICTIONARY. ALL THEY KNOW IS TO GO ON A DATE WITH A NEW CATCH AND ORDER WHAT THIER FATHER CANT BUY THEM AT HOME. THEY EAT WITH GREED AND GROW BELLIES LIKE GLUTTON. VALENTINES DAY IS APPROACHING, IF YOU DOUBT ALL I'M SAYING VISIT A NEARBY EATRY AND SEE THEM FILL THIER TABLES WITH FOODS AND DRINKS THEY CAN'T AFFORD COURTESY OF A NEW MAGA SITTING IN HER FRONT. THIEVES

Hahahahha. Bros, you dey vex o. Its your second post I'm reading today. It's sad that you have been heartbroken several times and that you've not been so lucky in love matters. However, NOT[b] all girls are thieves as you have repeatedly emphasized. Some ladies are selfless givers that aren't so bothered about getting anything in return. Maybe you've been looking in the wrong places. Now you're searching for love in Ghana and South Africa. I laff in Chinese. Better search in the right places and turn off your mugu switch. Maybe you'd be lucky this time.


My 2kobo

PLEASE MEN, TURN TO A NEW LIVE!!! A WOMAN IS YOUR PARTNER NOT YOUR SLAVE WHICH YOU FEEL YOU CAN DO ANYTHING. MOST MEN ARE NOT QUALIFIED TO BE THE HEAD. MANY OF THEM DON'T EVEN KNOW THEIR RESPONSIBILITIES OVER A WOMAN- SHAME! AND SO THEY HAVE SACRIFICED THEIR GLORY, HONOUR, AND RESPECT AS THE HEAD. NEVER TRICK A WOMAN BECAUSE YOU DON'T HAVE MONEY RATHER BE YOURSELF BECAUSE MONEY IS NOT EVERYTHING. IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBLE AND MATURED CHARACTER THAT COUNTS. A WOMAN CAN EVEN BE TAKING CARE IF YOU HAVE THESE DIGNIFIED QUALITIES. IT IS HIGH TIME MEN SHOULD WAKE UP TO SOCIAL, FAMILY, MARITAL, MATURITY, DESCENT, GLORIOUS, AND RESPONSIBILITY CHALLENGES.

POSTED BY JAMES I.M

kayciano:
WOMEN think they are the only ones interested in HUSBANDs....

I need a WIFE as well....
-a working class lady
- a presentable lady...
-height 5ft 5inch at least..or 1.7M.
-waist line 36...
-ass line 52...
-breast line 40...
-oblong head/face....
-retroverted UTERUS...
-age..b/w 22 and 26..
-fair to creamy in complexion.
-last Baby of the family precisely..
-CGPA..3.5 and above..
- a Christian ( well devoted)
-or Muslim ready to convert..
-virgin or near Virgin..
-enlightened and sociable..but prudent..
-superb medical history...
-adventurous, yet submissive...
-Minimal dependent relatives..
-comfortable family...
-genotype AA, HIV negative, EBOLA negative,
-family not more than 5siblings..with most married

DON'T BOTHER ABOUT ME...
WHEN U MEET ME , u will definitely CHERISH ME...
I have a GOOD JOB, GOOD APARTMENT, and growing in my profession.

Guy u de vex? Abeg calm down oo. Can't stop laughing

Good points but a bit tilted. You could have try to make more balanced.

kayciano:
WOMEN think they are the only ones interested in HUSBANDs....

I need a WIFE as well....
-a working class lady
- a presentable lady...
-height 5ft 5inch at least..or 1.7M.
-waist line 36...
-ass line 52...
-breast line 40...
-oblong head/face....
-retroverted UTERUS...
-age..b/w 22 and 26..
-fair to creamy in complexion.
-last Baby of the family precisely..
-CGPA..3.5 and above..
- a Christian ( well devoted)
-or Muslim ready to convert..
-virgin or near Virgin..
-enlightened and sociable..but prudent..
-superb medical history...
-adventurous, yet submissive...
-Minimal dependent relatives..
-comfortable family...
-genotype AA, HIV negative, EBOLA negative,
-family not more than 5siblings..with most married

DON'T BOTHER ABOUT ME...
WHEN U MEET ME , u will definitely CHERISH ME...
I have a GOOD JOB, GOOD APARTMENT, and growing in my profession.

As the answer given to ladies with the same mentality oozing from these ridiculous requirements of yours, I'd say ''Look no farther dude; just go mould her yourself!''

Well meaning romantic relationships, shared by two well meaning, consenting matured adults are supposed to lead to marriage, like every other endeavour or process that has an ultimate goal, marriage is the ultimate goal of a romantic relationship (I say this with caution though, because I know there are people who just want to "seed around" and enjoy/explore their sexuality). That's the more reason I used "well meaning" and "matured adults".

However, even in light of this "ultimate goal", a lady above 30 who begins to put moderately to excessively noticeable pressure on her man to get married to her would only miss out on an otherwise beautiful relationship. Just because you're 30 and single doesn't mean you should make the relationship mechanically fine tuned towards marriage alone, where the relationship becomes only worth it, if the man has proposed after 3months,... Even at the age of 30,I believe a woman can still enjoy other wonderful elements of a loving relationship-companionship, friendship, pulled resources, informed advices and so on.... But if she suddenly deems him not ready for marriage and decides to bail on him... For the singular reason of not being ready for Marriage even though he ticks all her other check boxes,.... I think in summary she's just being a stupiid above 30 young woman.

I would probably get married when I'm 33/34....maybe or maybe not to someone who is in her late 20's to early 30's....even at that age I would still want to enjoy romantic love with her and simmer in everything love related in the relationship, I will not want to be put in a position where all she wants from me is my surname..... At all ages... Whether 18 or 80,it is love and Compatibility that really counts....I would want to know that this woman loves me for me and not because of my surname.



Ohhh by the way.... Very nice post OP. I learnt quite a lot.


The solution may just even be to pick a girl of 21 when I want to get married .... To avoid all this "do's and don'ts"

Woged2005:


This was my major problem too. People around called me picky but I was not. I just moved on when I found out that man was only wasting my time and trying to cash in on my age. When you meet a serious man it doesn't take forever. Things happen very fast. Two matured minds know what they want. once they meet each other they click. Even when the man doesn't have everything going, you can pool resources together
togetherthingst things going. He must pay the bride price (with no assistance. It's tradition). But since you are working you can assist with wedding plans and settling down (aka housing, rent, furniture, etc)

My dear when it comes to paying the bride price alone I think u got it wrong...these days, when the centre can no longer hold, even family and friends members help out to keep the whole stuff. I have observed it myself..