am having a problem with my girlfriend. for some months now i have not gone to see her but i make sure i give her a call atmost everyday. but i only went there on saturday last week to checkup on her cos i normally work mondays thru fridays, so saturdays am always free. But to my surprise she was not like happy to see me and i knew sth was wrong. I ask but she said nothin. i kept on pressing and asked if it was cos i not been showing up and she said maybe. but it was as if sth else was inside her that she wanted to let out but she never wanted to talk me about it, she only said when she is done with whatever is on her mind maybe then she can let me know. i later told her to call me but She said she was out of credit and cash and i sent her one but she insisted on sending it back to me that she does not needcredit on her phone for now. i later asked her to come over so that we can just have a quite time for each other to discuss issues but she said that she will be busy.

I really need ur opinion to know what to do right now? please guys help a brother out

oceanman,i didnt rreally specify what resulted to ur initial staying off but i'll say before u can make out whats there to do ur girlfriends mindset ought to be known. avoid jumping into conclusions or try to guess wrongly.which might be a good opening 4 her to react negatively.keep intouch with her.try to visit regularly.hopefully things would work out.be there!!!

Crabsweet,
I would advise you to leave her for now, i dont mean break up
i mean don't ask her whatz the matter or keep stressing her about the problem
just behave like nothing is going on.

it is possible she doesn't want you anymore or is looking for an excuse to discard you.
but something definitely is wrong.
when you try to be too caring she will take advantage of you.
so try to act more manly for some time.
i know you love your Girl but this wouldn't stop your love unless she wants it to.

your behaviour now matters
so just behave like nothing is wrong, visit her when you can, but don't let her know that something bothers you.

then her reaction might change.
but letz see how things work out.

Bros from u brief explanation, your girl has gotten herself another man and d reason being that u left her alone for too long, women need all the attention in this gaddam world which a normal man can bearly give them and u, adding insult on the injury and not seeing her for months as u said, didnt ur mama tell u dat "out of sight is out of mind" what d hell do u expect!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I disagree with you beelyjay, leaving her for sometime may make her lonely or angry but itz not enough reason to leave him
if she does, then what existed between them is not LOVE

I think the lady has something up her sleeve. Let's not mince words about it. There is a very big possibility that she has started something with someone else behind your back and she is looking for you to make the wrong move (like getting angry and saying or doing something that would hurt her) and she'll use it as springboard to call the relationship off. For now I suggest that you give her some time to cool off then go to her for a real talk. Watch out for her composure. It will really tell a lot if there's something she's hiding or finding difficult to express to you. Oh, one more thing, well, never mind just try this tip 1st

dvampire

please tell me the other thing you wanted to say so that i can know what to do. i really appreciate all your opinions about this. but dvampire the other thing u wanted to say to me kindly tell me so that i will know wat to do next.

@crabsweet
do not be too harsh in your approach towards the matter. go to it with seriousness but with caution so that she will not pick on you thru your words. do not think you can get the truth out from her using sex as a tool of manipulation. it might backfire. that was the other thing i wanted to say. if she still remains the same after your discussion give her some space for a while. call or send sms at intervals but avoid going to her place for a while. sometimes, girls need to sort out their emotions especially if they have mood swings in this case, they kinda become touchy.

maybe she fed up, maybe she found someone else, maybe she's got no love for u no more, lots of maybes.

I'll advise u just give her space, she'll come around wateva it may be!

@Oracle
nice one, recommended

may be, may be, may be,, she probably doesnt even know what her problem is, if your not guilty of anything dont worry much so she doesnt take too much advantage."be nice but dont take shit"

guys i have tried calling her for some time now and she never picks up her phone. i even tried with other lines but the same thing. i usually try it two days interval but she never picks up

thanks for the tips Dvampire

@crabsweet,
ur case is pathetic,d simple truth is dat d girl has found another lover,believe it or not-it happnd 2 a frnd of mine,bt nw d girl is cryn/dyn 2 get her space back,which has been taken over by another girl-listen,ur girl will come back after bein used up by her new lover-please dnt act romeo wen she comes back,u can either use her as "toothpick" or send her away like a dog-b strng my brother, sme girls dnt av conscience.

georgee:

@crabsweet,
your case is pathetic,d simple truth is that d girl has found another lover,believe it or not-it happnd 2 a frnd of mine,bt nw d girl is cryn/dyn 2 get her space back,which has been taken over by another girl-listen,your girl will come back after bein used up by her new lover-please dnt act romeo when she comes back,u can either use her as "toothpick" or send her away like a dog-b strng my brother, sme girls dnt av conscience.

U harsh o! Na wah for u! no mind am jare, she needs time off. but make up ur mind that anything can happen. she mite never come back u know!

@ crab sweet;

Just give her some space and time; Its possible that:

1. She thinks shes got another man.
2. Shes getting bored.
3. She has some serious stuff on her mind; maybe AIDS, death of s/one close; found out shes sterile, turned Lesbian; u know smthg serious.
4. Shes fishing for more care attention; probably u've been doing the Nice GUy, and shit, it dont work, man!!!

Now, please note that none of them is ur fault, so dont blame urself; also dont feel inferior; for her to have liked you initially means u're great enough; or even greater. Thats why the best thing to do is to just leave her alone for some weeks; then maybe bump into her on her way to salon on sunday evening or smthg like that; two things can happen;

1. You meet her in a lighter mood and shes shocked to see u (u notice it) u then check her eyes is they still have u in them or, If u see shes still interested, but fronting; just give her cursory greeting and an excuse to leave soon. If not; take the same step.

2. You meet her with another man. Fact is whether its her brother or a friend from work; it could have been you; so just greet her vVERY elaborately and go on; with the sad news in ur heart!

The only contigency this wont solve is if she has, say, AIDS!!! Now thats a matter for another POST!

She's got a lot on her mind. Maybe she's considering someone else or maybe she's got some other personal problems that she needs to sort out alone. Give her some space but don't ignore her, never ever accuse her of unfaithfulness. Make her realize how much you love and care about her whenever you have the opportunity.
Good luck.


Where is Babeelove, iice, Olanajim, Sienna and other level headed human beings on this forum. There's a loose animal in this forum that needs to be curtailed quickly before he destroys himself. He calls himself Oracle99 and has two post titled: where are the good girls, the answer and 8 golden rules to a lasting relationship. Please take a look at these posts.
Although, I think this He goat is looking for cheap popularity and enjoying this, he needs to be taught a lesson.
See you guys.

l suggest you give her time and space,she just might be going through a rough emotional phase!