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How Young Is Too Young? - Family - Nairaland

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How Young Is Too Young? by safarigirl(f): 10:23am On Mar 05, 2015
Remember the story of Elizabeth Smart? The 12-year old girl who was kidnapped from her home and held captive for 9 months? Did you know she was being held just 12 miles away from her home? Did you know at the time she was kidnapped, an 8-year old black girl was also kidnapped and tied up in a room by a couple of druggies?

Did you know that the 8-year old black girl was able to nibble through the rope she was tied up in and escape within 4 hours of her kidnap? Did you know Elizabeth was never tied up by her captors nor did she ever check to see if the doors were locked? Do you wonder why I'm making this comparison of an older white girl and a younger black girl's similar experiences?

To prove the point that age is never an excuse for stewpidity, complacency or bad decisions. The only reason we heard Elizabeth's story and not the black girl's (apart from the race thing) is that Elizabeth stayed much longer than the black girl.....and Elizabeth was just not as Smart as her surname suggested

I believe most of us were never taught sex education by our parents, most of us learnt of the idea of sex in school by teachers and peers. If most Nigerian kids therefore weren't taught these things, how come a good number of girls manage to avoid teenage pregnancy when their peers fall into them?

The most annoying statement most girls make when they get pregnant while in school is "I'm pregnant because my parents failed to teach me sex education"...I just want to bytch-slap the chics that make such statements. If in this jet age you still need your mummy to sit you down and tell you that if you smash some dude without protection, you'll get pregnant, then you're dumber than a goat.

Another vexing thing I want to address is this idea that when a 23-year old dude(or so) sleeps with a 15-year old, it's the guy that was wrong. Unless under duress or downright r-ape, then they were both wrong and they BOTH should have known better.

What a lot of people fail to take into cognizance is that a 15-year old as at 1985 is NOT the same as a 15-year old of 2015...a lady I know is of the belief that there isn't a 15-year old in the world who isn't in a relationship or who doesn't have an idea of a relationship....so why do people feel the need to make excuses for 15-year old girls that do dumb stuff like sleep around? Aren't there girls their age and even older who don't do such? Are those girls superhuman?

Adam Johnson, a Sundeland player, is currently under fire for allegedly sleeping with a 15-year old girl, and I ask why? Did he use force on her? Where did they meet? Was he aware of her age? Because in this day and age of agric kids, a 15-year old girl could easily pass for 20....no one is asking the girl's role in this and everyone is condemning an unfortunate man who just happened to have taken the wrong girl home after a night of fun

The Western world is especially guilty of victimising men in such situations and painting these foolish (and sometimes scheming) 'little girls' as the 'innocent victims'.....but are they really little girls?

The world at large really needs to re-evaluate and question our mindsets. How young is too young really?

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Re: How Young Is Too Young? by jasper7(m): 10:41am On Mar 05, 2015
@safarigirl. the thing about statutory rape is this, a kid of 15 years is not emotionally stable enough to make some certain decisions, the older person should know better. No matter how u put it, it's still taking advantage of someone's instability. and to me, it's wrong. A 15year old can be an "Albert Einstein" and still not stable enough to make life changing decisions. There's a difference between being smart and being mature.

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Re: How Young Is Too Young? by jasper7(m): 10:53am On Mar 05, 2015
I agree with you though, not every kid is a kid. And I am one who strongly believes Maturity is not determined by age. but no responsible "adult" should be caught pants down with a kid. That's just my opinion tho. To me it's just like sleeping with a someone who just got his/her heart broken or drunk or drugged or beating up a Lady or taking advantage of an 80 or 90 year old or my best friend's gal. One person has to take the moral high ground and that has to be the person with the more stable emotion.
Re: How Young Is Too Young? by Euphrosyne(m): 11:22am On Mar 05, 2015
This is an awesome write up
Re: How Young Is Too Young? by safarigirl(f): 12:38pm On Mar 05, 2015
jasper7:
@safarigirl. the thing about statutory rape is this, a kid of 15 years is not emotionally stable enough to make some certain decisions, the older person should know better. No matter how u put it, it's still taking advantage of someone's instability. and to me, it's wrong. A 15year old can be an "Albert Einstein" and still not stable enough to make life changing decisions. There's a difference between being smart and being mature.
....15 year olds kill people...there is no defined age for emotional stability, even some 30 year olds are not emotionally stable enough to make certain decisions as well but nobody makes that an excuse with them

...And like in the case of the Johnson fellow, what if a man isn't aware the girl is 15? Is that not a possibility? Does it also become the man's fault when a 15-year old lies about her true age? Should people be asking for IDs to get with women now?
Re: How Young Is Too Young? by ebosse(m): 6:29pm On Mar 05, 2015
jasper7:
@safarigirl. the thing about statutory rape is this, a kid of 15 years is not emotionally stable enough to make some certain decisions, the older person should know better. No matter how u put it, it's still taking advantage of someone's instability. and to me, it's wrong. A 15year old can be an "Albert Einstein" and still not stable enough to make life changing decisions. There's a difference between being smart and being mature.


Not every 15 looks 15.... i know an 18yr old girl who looks 24 both facially and physically.


I totally agree with you though I believe the blame should be solely on the man if he knew but still went ahead notwithstanding.


I just cant picture myself being intimate with a TEENAGER (19 included)
Re: How Young Is Too Young? by coogar: 7:09pm On Mar 05, 2015
safarigirl:
....15 year olds kill people...there is no defined age for emotional stability, even some 30 year olds are not emotionally stable enough to make certain decisions as well but nobody makes that an excuse with them

...And like in the case of the Johnson fellow, what if a man isn't aware the girl is 15? Is that not a possibility? Does it also become the man's fault when a 15-year old lies about her true age? Should people be asking for IDs to get with women now?

adam johnson knew the laws of the country he resides before bonking an underage girl - he has to take responsibility for his carelessness. i get the point that a girl of 15 might easily pass as 25 but then he should have insisted on seeing any form of ID.

he's a celebrity - he's a prey to millions of women out there. ordinary regular boys in this country check IDs & passports before going home with a chic, how much more a well known football player? he's a daftie and he deserves to be punished if what was alleged is true.

the word of mouth isn't enough - majority of the underage girls lie about their age in this country to have sex with adults, buy cigarettes, buy alcohol or when they want to sneak into the club. adam johnson had no excuse at all - he should have done his due diligence.

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Re: How Young Is Too Young? by AZeD1(m): 11:18pm On Mar 05, 2015
safarigirl:
....15 year olds kill people...there is no defined age for emotional stability, even some 30 year olds are not emotionally stable enough to make certain decisions as well but nobody makes that an excuse with them

...And like in the case of the Johnson fellow, what if a man isn't aware the girl is 15? Is that not a possibility? Does it also become the man's fault when a 15-year old lies about her true age? Should people be asking for IDs to get with women now?
Ignorance is no excuse under the law.
Adam Johnson knows the law, he should have insisted on seeing an ID.
Re: How Young Is Too Young? by Babygal4eva(f): 11:36pm On Mar 05, 2015
A young girl of 15 is emotionally immature to consent to haing a consenual relationship with a full grown man. A 15 year old girl still has stars in her eyes, still sees the world as a hramless place still sees herself as indestructable.

When I was fifteen I had a cute Maths teacher Oh boy he was hot(lol this guy made me know Maths aswear I jack am like mad) and if he asked me out and said I shouldn't tell anyone I would probably have agreed, that's what teenage crush is it doesn't see age as a barrier. The man on the other hand should know better, he ought to know that if he sleeps with a young girl that he is a pedo simple and short.

I don't care how mature a 15 year old looks ask for some form of identification or even by the way they talk you ought to be able to know how old a lady is. It's the law there really is no excuse.

And for a lady who will blame her parents for not educating her on sex in this day an age is like APC goons blaming Jonathan for not washing their car for them every morning, complete and utter rubb.ish. Abi they taught you how to spread your legs for the guy.
Re: How Young Is Too Young? by Sanchez01: 11:48pm On Mar 05, 2015
The case of Elizabeth Smart and the 8-year old girl who nibbled her way through is indeed thoughtful. However, realize that race plays a whole lot of roles here. An average black man, mainly in the US feels uneasy on sighting cops and has the tendency to be suspected even when he has done nothing, whereas a white man would be his normal self; act cool and accommodate questions. Still, this may seem a bit off point but it's the truth, particularly if we're to look at the two from the angle of race.

To answer your question, how young a child is not established with regards to her height stature, academic class etc, rather, her age. A big breasted 13, 14,15, 16 and 17 year-old girl is still young and should be seen as such. But then again, to be fair, the concept and the answer to this rests on background, norms and ideology.

Almost every sane individual would frown at the marriage of a 14 year-old girl whereas this remains a huge delicacy and the dreams of some wealthy men in the North.

Conventionally, young would mean you still live under your parents, you're not fully responsible for yourself yet, you're incapable and still directly influenced by your parents, you're not recognized by the law as an adult and so much more. While the standard of measuring how young is young will be a life-long debate, one must understand that societal circumstances can fertilize a 12 year old girl into becoming an adult. The case of Karim Benzema and Ribery comes to mind.

The definition of young is so broad and expansive that it bothers on every facet of a man's life. For example,

*Emotions
*Reasoning
*Utterance
*Temperance
*Foresight
*Values and moral judgements
*and so much more...

We may not be able to agree in totality but the fact that a 15 year old is capable of killing does not define him/her as an adult. This discourse is terribly broad.
Re: How Young Is Too Young? by Sanchez01: 11:50pm On Mar 05, 2015
Babygal4eva:
A young girl of 15 is emotionally immature to consent to haing a consenual relationship with a full grown man. A 15 year old girl still has stars in her eyes, still sees the world as a hramless place still sees herself as indestructable.

When I was fifteen I had a cute Maths teacher Oh boy he was hot(lol this guy made me know Maths aswear I jack am like mad) and if he asked me out and said I shouldn't tell anyone I would probably have agreed, that's what teenage crush is it doesn't see age as a barrier. The man on the other hand should know better, he ought to know that if he sleeps with a young girl that he is a pedo simple and short.

I don't care how mature a 15 year old looks ask for some form of identification or even by the way they talk you ought to be able to know how old a lady is. It's the law there really is no excuse.

And for a lady who will blame her parents for not educating her on sex in this day an age is like APC goons blaming Jonathan for not washing their car for them every morning, complete and utter rubb.ish. Abi they taught you how to spread your legs for the guy.
And you had to bring politics in because?
Re: How Young Is Too Young? by Babygal4eva(f): 11:53pm On Mar 05, 2015
Sanchez01:

And you had to bring politics in because?

smiley smiley My apologies it's like a reflex action nowadays
Re: How Young Is Too Young? by Sanchez01: 11:56pm On Mar 05, 2015
Babygal4eva:


smiley smiley My apologies it's like a reflex action nowadays
Accepted smiley smiley
Re: How Young Is Too Young? by safarigirl(f): 5:34am On Mar 06, 2015
AZeD1:

Ignorance is no excuse under the law.
Adam Johnson knows the law, he should have insisted on seeing an ID.
an the girl goes scot free for deceit cuz she's too dum-b to know what she did was wrong?

Sounds like injustice to me undecided
Re: How Young Is Too Young? by safarigirl(f): 5:44am On Mar 06, 2015
Babygal4eva:
A young girl of 15 is emotionally immature to consent to haing a consenual relationship with a full grown man. A 15 year old girl still has stars in her eyes, still sees the world as a hramless place still sees herself as indestructable.

When I was fifteen I had a cute Maths teacher Oh boy he was hot(lol this guy made me know Maths aswear I jack am like mad) and if he asked me out and said I shouldn't tell anyone I would probably have agreed, that's what teenage crush is it doesn't see age as a barrier. The man on the other hand should know better, he ought to know that if he sleeps with a young girl that he is a pedo simple and short.

I don't care how mature a 15 year old looks ask for some form of identification or even by the way they talk you ought to be able to know how old a lady is. It's the law there really is no excuse.

And for a lady who will blame her parents for not educating her on sex in this day an age is like APC goons blaming Jonathan for not washing their car for them every morning, complete and utter rubb.ish. Abi they taught you how to spread your legs for the guy.
the average one supposedly.....

But doesn't a 21-year old have stars in her eyes as well? I feel the outlook of the 15 and 21 year olds as far as men go are almost alike....once again, this may be strongly contested, but I'm of the opinion that no matter the pressure or the 'stars' in her eyes, 15-year olds who recognize that a man is well...a 'man' who is beyond their scope should also have the sense to lay off

Some of them even draw up seduction plans and still, they're the innocent ones. If ignorance is not an excuse, then age as well should not be an excuse.
Re: How Young Is Too Young? by Babygal4eva(f): 8:05am On Mar 06, 2015
safarigirl:
the average one supposedly.....

But doesn't a 21-year old have stars in her eyes as well? I feel the outlook of the 15 and 21 year olds as far as men go are almost alike....once again, this may be strongly contested, but I'm of the opinion that no matter the pressure or the 'stars' in her eyes, 15-year olds who recognize that a man is well...a 'man' who is beyond their scope should also have the sense to lay off

Some of them even draw up seduction plans and still, they're the innocent ones. If ignorance is not an excuse, then age as well should not be an excuse.

That's true some 21-year olds do have stars in their eyes but then again they are old enough to handle the consequence of their actions so it's a lil different.
Re: How Young Is Too Young? by AZeD1(m): 8:45am On Mar 06, 2015
safarigirl:
an the girl goes scot free for deceit cuz she's too dum-b to know what she did was wrong?

Sounds like injustice to me undecided
The law expects the older person to make sound judgement...

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