I have noticed that, in recent times, most marriages break up within 5 years. I have been the best man at two weddings in the last 4 years, and those couples are no longer together. Even some of my family members that got married in the last 10 years are no longer together.

Why is the case of divorce and separation so high these days. And if it is not divorce or separation, you read on Nairaland every day how one wife burnt the husband or cut off his manhood, or how a husband beat his wife to death.

Why is this so rampant these days?

You wey be best man suppose tell us nah

Tallesty1:
You wey be best man suppose tell us nah

If I knew, I wound't be asking.

Help me ask o.

Tolerance

Not everyone can tolerate cheating/abuse/lies/bad times
Many more

There's no ONE reason for the high rates of marriage failure these days. Rather, I believe it's a combination of factors. Lemme briefly address A FEW of these factors:

1. Gender equality and role reversal:
In times past, the roles of men and women were clearly delineated. A husband was expected to be the bread winner, while the wife was to be the submissive homemaker. These days however, a lot of women would rather pursue careers (which I support anyway) and some even have become breadwinners. We haven't yet rewritten the roles, to reflect the new ideas. Hence, families are struggling to cope.

2. Social Media:
A lot of young people would rather advertise their problems on social media than talk through them with their partners. This has led to poor communication in the home. It's no longer unusual to see two or more people in the same room, smiling into their smartphones for hours, and not talking to each other. It's creating a real communication gap.

Also, a lot of people are so hot in pursuit of 'Likes' on Facebook & Instagram and 'Followers' on twitter, etc, that they fail to realise that this doesn't necessarily translate into love in real life.

3.Societal Influence and Religion:
The general (erroneous) belief that once a lady is 25yrs and unmarried, it means she has spiritual problems, has made a lot of women rush into marriage without really getting to know the man they're marrying.

4. The Rat race:
These days, families (especially us younger generation) are getting to spend less and less time together. We spend the greater part of our time at work, chasing money. This doesn't allow for healthy family bonding.

[b]5.Western Influence and Intolerance:
[/b]From Hollywood to Nollywood, it has almost become fashionable to divorce your partner at the first hint of trouble. The general reason is "due to irreconcilable differences". We no longer wish to sit down and address these differences, cos we feel we're being under appreciated by our partners. The grass is always greener on the other side.


There lots of other reasons...I'll just allow other people air their views

The social media, Pop culture, lack of tolerance, taking each other for granted.

1. Social media: Most partners have not learnt to use social media properly. You see an average married woman posting revealing pictures online just to crave the attention of the male folks. You would see comments like: "your as.s is big, that bo.obs is sumptuous" and all sort of rubbish that her admirers would be posting. No sane man would see this and still admire you except you are his mistress. Moderation is key and people need to watch it.

The male folks are not left out. Some would continue chatting with numerous ladies asking for pics, sex chats, lewd talks and so on. Also, there's emotional cheating which social media has made more easier to perpetuate. You would find couples on the phone till late in the mid night talking with so call friends. Ladies having that "special male friend" who always makes her happy online neglecting her partner and same for the male folks. Another important point is that many ladies have become wise which is good and they don't turn a black eye to infidelity like our mothers used to di. They are liberated and would rather walk away than stay back.

2. POP CULTURE: Ladies now believe in equality as posited by Hollywood movies and so on which is not what marriage is all about. Yeah equality at the work place is ideal and lovely but when it comes to marriage, truth is we are created differently and have different roles. Couples must understand there is no competition. Each person have different roles to play and the man just happens to be the leader. MIGHT sound awkward for the ladies, but that's the truth. As for the males. Most forget that leadership is not about making laws, barking orders and showing stronghead but protecting, caring and being just. If you are a despotic leader, your followers would definitely revolt one day. If you are however a caring and loving leader, no one would question your leadership.

3. Lack of tolerance:I guess we are less tolerant of each other nowadays. People flare up easily and are easily moved to anger by little things.

4.Taking each other for granted:
Not doing things that makes your partner appreciate you more. People are more individualistic now and are only concerned about "me , me and me alone"

5.Finance.
You all know the situation of the country. Most families are struggling to make ends meet and the lack of money especially in the early stages of marriage puts a lot more strain on the couples and it only takes the will of God and discipline to overcome such problems. Also most new families are not realistic and spend way above their finances. They give birth to kids they cannot take care of and so on thus piling up debts. When partners learn to live within their means there would be less pressure on their daily lives.

Dyt:
Tolerance

Not everyone can tolerate cheating/abuse/lies/bad times
Many more

So true. We don't tolerate cheating. It is either you say "I do" or you don't just enter at first.

What others said about other factors like are also true too.

Lack of understanding from both partners may also be a key factor too.

May God help our generation.

onegig:
The social media, Pop culture, lack of tolerance, taking each other for granted.

1. Social media: Most partners have not learnt to use social media properly. You see an average married woman posting revealing pictures online just to crave the attention of the male folks. You would see comments like: "your as.s is big, that bo.obs is sumptuous" and all sort of rubbish that her admirers would be posting. No sane man would see this and still admire you except you are his mistress and not wife thus creating distrust. Moderation is key and people need to watch it.

Also the male folks are not left out. Some would continue chatting with numerous ladies asking for pics, sex chats, lewd talks and so on. Also, there's emotional cheating which social media has made more easier to perpetuate. You would find couples on the phone till late in the mid night. Ladies having that "special male friend" who always makes her happy online neglecting her partner and same for the male folks. Also Many ladies have become wise which is good. They don't turn a black eye to infidelity like our mothers used to. They are liberated and would rather walk away than stay back.

2. POP CULTURE: Ladies now believe in equality as posited by Hollywood movies and so on which is not what marriage is all about. Yeah equality at the work place is ideal but when it comes to marriage, truth is we are created differently and have different roles. couples must understand there's should be no competition. Each person just have different roles and the man just happens to be the leader. MIGHT sound awkward for the ladies, but that's the truth. Also the males forget that leadership is not about making laws, barking orders and showing strong head but protecting, caring and being just. If you are a despotic leader, your followers would definitely revolt one day. If you are however a caring and loving leader, no one would question your leadership.

3. Lack of tolerance:I guess we are less tolerant of each other nowadays. People flare up easily and are easily moved to anger by little irrelevant things.

4.Taking each other for granted
Not doing things that makes your partner appreciate you more. People are more individualistic now and are only concerned about "me , me and me alone"

5.Finance.
You all know the situation of the country. Most families are struggling to makes end meet and the lack of finance especially in the early stages of marriage puts a lot more strain on the couples and it only takes the will of God and discipline to overcome such problems. Most are not realistic and spend way above their finances. Give birth to kids they cannot take care of and so on. When partners learn to live within their means there would be less pressure on their daily lives.

i reason with u- food for thought

How many people were ready when they got married?
















Plus the Kardashians...



Stop Keeping up with the Kardashians.

1. Men are Sexists and Chauvinistic in nature
Most men are sexists and chauvinistic in nature therefore making them selfish and loathe independent women. They make denigrating remarks about women and you don't expect a serious, logical and virtuous woman to remain with such a rètarded being.
Women in other hand, are peace loving and cool but their anti-feminism husband keeps antagonising them and they don't have an option but divorce him.





Thunder fire each and every guy that quoted me on this thread.
Y'all didn't see that the first point raised by dude above me is anti-feminism/woman but choose to attack me for airing mine.

Bunch of hypocrites.

The poster above really got me rotfl... seriously? i havent heard such kind of talk since sec. school.

One reason i see is unmatched expectations.people over estimate their worth mostly in relationships.

what i feel is dt ds days.pple get married 4 wrong reasons:age,money,beauty etc.till after marriage b4 eyes clear.then wahala comes.may God help us

How can somebody get married without getting to know whom you're marrying to. The best way to guarantee a long marriage is to first be a friend to your partner from there to relationship from relationship to courtship.....lastly marriage.
But today desperation is now the order of the day..
"If you rush into marriage, you might also rush out"

Oya continue..... Doesn't concern me yet ....until further notice..

People marry for lust,and not love...

High level of intolerance among the partners is another factors..

For those marriages that was installed within 5years limit.

Our women nowadays are manner less They are too materialistic!

Gone are the days when women were respectful. During the time of our mothers.

I don't want to say more

yes

Because the ladies want to weds but they don't want to marry

met each other today and wed tommorow, tell me how it going to last

Both parties are not ready to fulfil there obligations!

Expiry date I guess.

Lack of tolerance and trust....

Lack of understanding and commitment

Hmm

impotent

Because they refuse to submit (not referring to anybody).

Vickybee:

1. Men are Sexists and Chauvinistic in nature
Most men are sexists and chauvinistic in nature therefore making them selfish and loathe independent women. They make denigrating remarks about women and you don't expect a serious, logical and virtuous woman to remain with such a rètarded being.
Women in other hand, are peace loving and cool but their anti-feminism husband keeps antagonising them and they don't have an option but divorce him.

get some sleep I can see u need to reboot ur system via sleeping pls stop sprewing trash u gurls love to pretend fake sets of creatures lubbish

Pound your woman into or.gasmic ecstasy and your marriage has a chance of survival. But even with that, most women will always find something to bi.tch about.

that is celebrity marriage. nobody knows me and my marriage is still waxing stronger.