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How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? - Family - Nairaland

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How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Nobody: 4:12pm On May 04, 2015
How best to handle a stubborn wife...when I say stubborn, I mean very stubborn...she doesn't listen nor take any advice or order from her husband...doesn't respect the man's opinion about anything...

On the few occasions, when she accepts she was wrong, she also want to be the judge in her own case. If the husband airs his opinion about any subject, she would insist she consult google for her to believe. It's no exaggeration...this is how exactly she behaves.

Please note that she was the epitome of an humble woman before the wedding but as soon as the wedding bell rang, she became another thing entirely.

Please anyone with good idea on how to handle such women before divorce option?

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Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by StPete: 4:14pm On May 04, 2015
A friend is having a similar situation and I’d be so glad to get some ideas on here to give him

..expecting people’s advice

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Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by nairalife2013(m): 4:28pm On May 04, 2015
My wife turned bad two years after marriage. She was a perfect companion when we were dating.in the early times, I put her through rigorous tests like starving her of money, complaining a lot, keeping another girl and generally misbehaving once in a while. She was still religiously accomodating, forgiving, loving and highly respectful. I wasnt satisfied. I craved to see the worst in her, so I had to one day feign anger over a little kitchen error she committed. I had to gritt my teeth and do something venom-inspiring. Am a goodman no amount of punishment over and error am guilty of can turn me against my wife or any1 else, no matter the weight. If she is a wrong lady, she will display it today in her full glory. I wanted a wife I can trust. I dindt want to repeat the errors my parents made. That day I battered and pushed her out of my house into the rain and locked my door. The nite was just begining to inherit the earth. Time was 6.30pm

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Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by bukatyne(f): 4:33pm On May 04, 2015
netsurf:
How best to handle a stubborn wife...when I say stubborn, I mean vry stubborn...she doesn't listen nor take any advice or order from her husband...dosen't respect the man's opinion about anything...on a few occasions, when she accepts she was wrong, she also want to be the judge in her own case. If the husband view his opinion about any subject, she would insist she consult google for her to believe. It's no exageration...this is how exactly she behaves.

Pls note that she was the epitome of an humble woman before the wedding but as soon as the weding bell rang, she became another thing entirely.
Pls anyone with good idea on how to handle such women before divorce option?

What made her change after the wedding? Any incidence the husband can pinpoint to? Can you give specific instances of her 'stubbornness?'

Thinking divorce because of stubbornness, strange.

12 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Nobody: 4:45pm On May 04, 2015
bukatyne:


What made her change after the wedding? Any incidence the husband can pinpoint to? Can you give specific instances of her 'stubbornness?'

Thinking divorce because of stubbornness, strange.

There are just too many instances...pls read the first post again.

It may be strange to you but imagine a situation in which the man has no say in any descision on any subject...she always have her way...anything less, she complains endlessly.

1 Like

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by emilyone(f): 4:50pm On May 04, 2015
nairalife2013:
My wife turned bad two years after marriage. She was a perfect companion when we were dating.in the early times, I put her through rigorous tests like starving her of money, complaining a lot, keeping another girl and generally misbehaving once in a while. She was still religiously accomodating, forgiving, loving and highly respectful. I wasnt satisfied. I craved to see the worst in her, so I had to one day feign anger over a little kitchen error she committed. I had to gritt my teeth and do something venom-inspiring. Am a goodman no amount of punishment over and error am guilty of can turn me against my wife or any1 else, no matter the weight. If she is a wrong lady, she will display it today in her full glory. I wanted a wife I can trust. I dindt want to repeat the errors my parents made. That day I battered and pushed her out of my house into the rain and locked my door. The nite was just begining to inherit the earth. Time was 6.30pm
sad shocked shocked

7 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by bukatyne(f): 4:52pm On May 04, 2015
netsurf:


There are just too many instances...pls read the first post again.

It may be strange to you but imagine a situation in which the man has no say in any descision on any subject...she always have her way...anything less, she complains endlessly.

netsurf:
How best to handle a stubborn wife...when I say stubborn, I mean vry stubborn...she doesn't listen nor take any advice or order from her husband...dosen't respect the man's opinion about anything...on a few occasions, when she accepts she was wrong, she also want to be the judge in her own case. If the husband view his opinion about any subject, she would insist she consult google for her to believe. It's no exageration...this is how exactly she behaves.
Pls note that she was the epitome of an humble woman before the wedding but as soon as the weding bell rang, she became another thing entirely.
Pls anyone with good idea on how to handle such women before divorce option?

I cannot see any instance in the OP apart from the always consulting google part.

Can you share other instances? It would help

Thanks

11 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Nobody: 5:04pm On May 04, 2015
bukatyne:




I cannot see any instance in the OP apart from the always consulting google part.

Can you share other instances? It would help

Thanks


Okay, for instance, when the baby came, she breast feeded him exclusively for six months and then the stage to introduce some food came..the baby wouldn't accept those frisogold, cerelac etc but accepts Ogi well but she continually force him to take those friso/cerel and each time, the baby cries endlesslly and later vomits everything. Then at about 10 months old, the baby would accept amala, and indomie on his own without been forced...then she brought in golden morn which the baby spits out the moment it touches his mouth...despite this, she started forcing him again...so the husband said don't give it to him any more...give what he is okay with. Rather than explain why she want to continue forcing him, she went and bought a bigger bag of the golden morn...then the husband threw it away...this happenned last Thursday and since then she has stopped greeting her husband and even prepare food when she like since then.

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by MRBrownJ: 5:25pm On May 04, 2015
netsurf:
How best to handle a stubborn wife...when I say stubborn, I mean vry stubborn...she doesn't listen nor take any advice or order from her husband...dosen't respect the man's opinion about anything...on a few occasions, when she accepts she was wrong, she also want to be the judge in her own case. If the husband view his opinion about any subject, she would insist she consult google for her to believe. It's no exageration...this is how exactly she behaves.

Pls note that she was the epitome of an humble woman before the wedding but as soon as the weding bell rang, she became another thing entirely.
Pls anyone with good idea on how to handle such women before divorce option?

what else is there to do but to explain to her that you desperately need to find the lady you were dating and proposed to, and not this stubborn being that she turned into, before you take drastic measures. if she decides to change, you have to monitor her to make sure that any time she slips, you bring her back to reality. since she possibly wont believe your threats, i suggest you go ahead with divorce planning to make sure she understands you means business.

30 Likes 7 Shares

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by sammieguze(m): 5:35pm On May 04, 2015
Hmmmmmm....

Incidence like this re some of the reasons guys re unwilling to get married formally.







Bt sha... Just here to read comments

E get as e be bros

6 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by bukatyne(f): 5:50pm On May 04, 2015
netsurf:


Okay, for instance, when the baby came, she breast feeded him exclusively for six months and then the stage to introduce some food came..the baby wouldn't accept those frisogold, cerelac etc but accepts Ogi well but she continually force him to take those friso/cerel and each time, the baby cries endlesslly and later vomits everything. Then at about 10 months old, the baby would accept amala, and indomie on his own without been forced...then she brought in golden morn which the baby spits out the moment it touches his mouth...despite this, she started forcing him again...so the husband said don't give it to him any more...give what he is okay with. Rather than explain why she want to continue forcing him, she went and bought a bigger bag of the golden morn...then the husband threw it away...this happenned last Thursday and since then she has stopped greeting her husband and even prepare food when she like since then.

I can sense power play here

Some kids certainly like to be ajepako and Some ajebutter Lol! and as the husband pointed out, she should have fed him with What he was comfortable with aslong as it was healthy.

Besides, There seems to be a lot of communication issues. What changed the wife from a sweet fiancee to the stubborn wife?

And also, There is nothing wrong with consulting with Google. You tend to get a lot of expert advice (If you can sift) online.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by babygirlfl: 6:13pm On May 04, 2015
nairalife2013:
My wife turned bad two years after marriage. She was a perfect companion when we were dating.in the early times, I put her through rigorous tests like starving her of money, complaining a lot, keeping another girl and generally misbehaving once in a while. She was still religiously accomodating, forgiving, loving and highly respectful. I wasnt satisfied. I craved to see the worst in her, so I had to one day feign anger over a little kitchen error she committed. I had to gritt my teeth and do something venom-inspiring. Am a goodman no amount of punishment over and error am guilty of can turn me against my wife or any1 else, no matter the weight. If she is a wrong lady, she will display it today in her full glory. I wanted a wife I can trust. I dindt want to repeat the errors my parents made. That day I battered and pushed her out of my house into the rain and locked my door. The nite was just begining to inherit the earth. Time was 6.30pm

You call all this testing her?

71 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Nobody: 7:19pm On May 04, 2015
netsurf:


Okay, for instance, when the baby came, she breast feeded him exclusively for six months and then the stage to introduce some food came..the baby wouldn't accept those frisogold, cerelac etc but accepts Ogi well but she continually force him to take those friso/cerel and each time, the baby cries endlesslly and later vomits everything. Then at about 10 months old, the baby would accept amala, and indomie on his own without been forced...then she brought in golden morn which the baby spits out the moment it touches his mouth...despite this, she started forcing him again...so the husband said don't give it to him any more...give what he is okay with. Rather than explain why she want to continue forcing him, she went and bought a bigger bag of the golden morn..then the husband threw it away...this happenned last Thursday and since then she has stopped greeting her husband and even prepare food when she like since then.
@bolded, sorry just had to laugh grin grin grin grin grin grin

Your wife is stubborn shaa.. nothing kills a man faster than losing his self respect esp at home... The problem here is communication. .

What caused the stubbornness she exhibits? Could it be you're too authoritative and she decided to toughen up? I ask because at your original post, you said she doesn't take orders from you.. how do you dish out the orders? Do you order her about like some househelp?? Is there any character of yours she may be angry about?

34 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by SAMBARRY: 7:43pm On May 04, 2015
This is what you need Mr Man

8 Likes 2 Shares

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by SAMBARRY: 7:45pm On May 04, 2015
And more importantly

13 Likes 2 Shares

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Nobody: 9:07pm On May 04, 2015
[quote author=MarvellousGod post=33418875] @bolded, sorry just had to laugh grin grin grin grin grin grin

Your wife is stubborn shaa.. nothing kills a man faster than losing his self respect esp at home... The problem here is communication. .

What caused the stubbornness she exhibits? Could it be you're too authoritative and she decided to toughen up? I ask because at your original post, you said she doesn't take orders from you.. how do you dish out the orders? Do you order her about like some househelp?? Is there any character of yours she may be angry about? [/quo


If there's, she's yet to complain...he dosen't order her about

2 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by nairalife2013(m): 10:48pm On May 04, 2015
The kind of woman I married are few. She hung at d door and cried and told me she was so sorry abt what she did. I was crying inside as she spoke amidst sobs. My heart bled. But I had to do it. I was abt to hand my life to some1. I needed the best. I did dat to two other ladies who coursed me and left my life for good. But this one wept and told me she so much loved me her life could crash or end by heartache if she left, and she confirmed she couldn't live a day without me. I would hav deciphered if she was feigning remorse. It wouldn't take me long. I am who I am.
I opened the door and brought her in. Till today she is not aware I faked that angst. I loved her more. I was loaded widout her knowledge. I got her her first car, a saloon as I proposed to her. She was just entering sch. We got married. She took in. At delivery of our first child, I got her a suv. We were young and full of life. I was living my life just to give her joy and all necessities of life. I loved her beyond words. When she took in for our second child, the conception was at a time a terrible moodswing hit my wife. I thot she had changed. She would pick up argument s with me and make faces a whole week just for no just cause. She quarreled wid my younger sisters at any slight provocation and sat all day in an unkempt home watching her regular, favourite fbi action movies. I was mesmerized. Little thins piss me up. But I endured this one. I was afraid somthing was wrong. After delivery of our second child, abt a year later, Like some1 that woke up from a nightmare, My wife came to me and complained she involuntarily wakes every morning with bouts of indescribable anger flourishing in her heart. Since that day I knew it was my turn by providence to show love and tolerance and understanding. I did. My wife went thro those tormentous days without knowing the reason why she was so angrily depressed. One day, She went consciously to my sisters and apologized. Spent more time with them and amended all errors. It's some years now and all those trying times are over, leaving behind funny reminisces only a good heart could understand. When a lady is good, she is good. Your own goodness tho might be regarded as weakness or greed by an incompatible third party. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. I do not regret my actions. Those ladies whose level of tolerance where below my recomended average had departed in good fate. I wished them luck and enduring love. My wife is now working and her welfare package, large as it is, is in my control on her insistence, with total abandon! She is selfless to a fault and prefares a one-lady lifestyle, upon the trappings of life chance and time have bestowed on her at her young age.
... My wife told me once: I see u not only as my husband but also as my father; reprimanding me in any way, as a father would her daughter, is lovingly accepted by me cause I trust yur sense of judgment and our kids would obey u for good if I myself obey u and succumb with respect; I love u to that point."
... There are many eager males and plenty of willing females in the world. If u stumble on yur right choice, love can let u into limitless tolerance. Many ladies are possesd by the destructive spirit of subconscious pride and seemingly suppressed self ego. The last creatures to know they need help allround. The few that are free hardly preach to their kind, The Message. Instead they vent the opposit of the message.
Dont do like me. I personally do not tally well long enoff with ladies who do not have the habit of accepting defeat wether they are right or wrong. Those type are good for one nite stand levels not for running a home. Pls find a way to be patient. If she is inherently a-self-worth-type of lady, u need to work harder on tolerance and never let yur praying knees get lazy. Goodluck.

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Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by cococandy(f): 12:32am On May 05, 2015
.
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by cococandy(f): 12:34am On May 05, 2015
undecided undecided undecided
nairalife2013:
My wife turned bad two years after marriage. She was a perfect companion when we were dating.in the early times, I put her through rigorous tests like starving her of money, complaining a lot, keeping another girl and generally misbehaving once in a while. She was still religiously accomodating, forgiving, loving and highly respectful. I wasnt satisfied. I craved to see the worst in her, so I had to one day feign anger over a little kitchen error she committed. I had to gritt my teeth and do something venom-inspiring. Am a goodman no amount of punishment over and error am guilty of can turn me against my wife or any1 else, no matter the weight. If she is a wrong lady, she will display it today in her full glory. I wanted a wife I can trust. I dindt want to repeat the errors my parents made. That day I battered and pushed her out of my house into the rain and locked my door. The nite was just begining to inherit the earth. Time was 6.30pm
nairalife2013:
The kind of woman I married are few. She hung at d door and cried and told me she was so sorry abt what she did. I was crying inside as she spoke amidst sobs. My heart bled. But I had to do it. I was abt to hand my life to some1. I needed the best. I did dat to two other ladies who coursed me and left my life for good. But this one wept and told me she so much loved me her life could crash or end by heartache if she left, and she confirmed she couldn't live a day without me. I would hav deciphered if she was feigning remorse. It wouldn't take me long. I am who I am.
I opened the door and brought her in. Till today she is not aware I faked that angst. I loved her more. I was loaded widout her knowledge. I got her her first car, a saloon as I proposed to her. She was just entering sch. We got married. She took in. At delivery of our first child, I got her a suv. We were young and full of life. I was living my life just to give her joy and all necessities of life. I loved her beyond words. When she took in for our second child, the conception was at a time a terrible moodswing hit my wife. I thot she had changed. She would pick up argument s with me and make faces a whole week just for no just cause. She quarreled wid my younger sisters at any slight provocation and sat all day in an unkempt home watching her regular, favourite fbi action movies. I was mesmerized. Little thins piss me up. But I endured this one. I was afraid somthing was wrong. After delivery of our second child, abt a year later, Like some1 that woke up from a nightmare, My wife came to me and complained she involuntarily wakes every morning with bouts of indescribable anger flourishing in her heart. Since that day I knew it was my turn by providence to show love and tolerance and understanding. I did. My wife went thro those tormentous days without knowing the reason why she was so angrily depressed. One day, She went consciously to my sisters and apologized. Spent more time with them and amended all errors. It's some years now and all those trying times are over, leaving behind funny reminisces only a good heart could understand. When a lady is good, she is good. Your own goodness tho might be regarded as weakness or greed by an incompatible third party. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. I do not regret my actions. Those ladies whose level of tolerance where below my recomended average had departed in good fate. I wished them luck and enduring love. My wife is now working and her welfare package, large as it is, is in my control on her insistence, with total abandon! She is selfless to a fault and prefares a one-lady lifestyle, upon the trappings of life chance and time have bestowed on her at her young age.
... My wife told me once: I see u not only as my husband but also as my father; reprimanding me in any way, as a father would her daughter, is lovingly accepted by me cause I trust yur sense of judgment and our kids would obey u for good if I myself obey u and succumb with respect; I love u to that point."
... There are many eager males and plenty of willing females in the world. If u stumble on yur right choice, love can let u into limitless tolerance. Many ladies are possesd by the destructive spirit of subconscious pride and seemingly suppressed self ego. The last creatures to know they need help allround. The few that are free hardly preach to their kind, The Message. Instead they vent the opposit of the message.
Dont do like me. I personally do not tally well long enoff with ladies who do not have the habit of accepting defeat wether they are right or wrong. Those type are good for one nite stand levels not for running a home. Pls find a way to be patient. If she is inherently a-self-worth-type of lady, u need to work harder on tolerance and never let yur praying knees get lazy. Goodluck.

12 Likes 2 Shares

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Ewuro4: 1:58am On May 05, 2015
@nairalife2013 .., you don't say? I fear una oh. 'The kind of woman you married are few' alright.

Netsurf, so she wants to keep up with the Jonesses so her friends/family won't make fun of her ni. Maybe you should open up and explain your financial struggles since golden morn/formular is straining your pocket.

Since she's bent on wasting resourses that are best diverted to other household necessities, reduce her quota. Abi how's that hard?

Just leave her alone and stop looking for her trouble since I see you enjoy rattling her for endless & unnecessary arguments. Because this woman won't back down grin

Check yourself too, you also have changed tremendously.it takes two wink

10 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by oweniwe(m): 7:30am On May 05, 2015
How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife?











Through her Vagiena lipsrsealed

2 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Nobody: 9:48am On May 05, 2015
Ewuro4:
@nairalife2013 .., you don't say? I fear una oh. 'The kind of woman you married are few' alright.

Netsurf, so she wants to keep up with the Jonesses so her friends/family won't make fun of her ni. Maybe you should open up and explain your financial struggles since golden morn/formular is straining your pocket.

Since she's bent on wasting resourses that are best diverted to other household necessities, reduce her quota. Abi how's that hard?

Just leave her alone and stop looking for her trouble since I see you enjoy rattling her for endless & unnecessary arguments. Because this woman won't back down grin

Check yourself too, you also have changed tremendously.it takes two wink

The husband is not a Dangote son but he's not strugling either...for your info, he's a generous husband when it comes to finances and pls it's erroneous to think that money would make a bad woman behave well...if she's bad, she is bad. The husband have sat her down severally to let him know if any of his attitude is responsible for her behaviors but she couldn't pin point anything. The husband is ready to go all the way through divorce if she is not ready to back down.

3 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by bukatyne(f): 9:55am On May 05, 2015
netsurf:


The husband is not a Dangote son but he's not strugling either...for your info, he's a generous husband when it comes to finances and pls it's erroneous to think that money would make a bad woman behave well...if she's bad, she is bad. The husband have sat her down severally to let him know if any of his attitude is responsible for her behaviors but she couldn't pin point anything. The husband is ready to go all the way through divorce if she is not ready to back down.


Maybe the wife was just pretending to get the crown ring and has decided to revert to her original self since she (according to you) has been unable to pinpoint what is aggravating her.

Are there elders the wife listens to? Has the husband tried counseling?

I don't think divorce is necessary in this case.
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Nobody: 2:20pm On May 05, 2015
bukatyne:


Maybe the wife was just pretending to get the crown ring and has decided to revert to her original self since she (according to you) has been unable to pinpoint what is aggravating her.

Are there elders the wife listens to? Has the husband tried counseling?

I don't think divorce is necessary in this case.

He has a feeling she won't respect any family or third party opinion different from her own. reason he has not considered inviting any third party.
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by money121(m): 2:45pm On May 05, 2015
ok

1 Like

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Fabdedon(m): 2:46pm On May 05, 2015
the deed has been done now its amending..
Create dat understanding between both of you..
Like the case of the golden morn.. Ask her why you forcing it on him? She simply gives her reason.. Then you reach a reasonable conclusion.. She has her reason you have yours.. Where by you both dont reason same direction dere tends to be clashes

2 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by naijainfogalery: 2:46pm On May 05, 2015
Become a billionaire, i have never seen a billionaire wife being stubborn grin

8 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by johnshagb(m): 2:46pm On May 05, 2015
Stubborn kwanu? You hustle in the current harsh economy of ours just to make sure she's okay and you mean all she serve you is stubbornness everyday?
Bone that thing, na her papa house sure pass. If you develop high blood pressure and die from its complications (God forbid) she'll morn for a while and jump on the next man available. I don't pray for a broken home but I promise myself no woman will take me for a ride. YOLO

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Nobody: 2:46pm On May 05, 2015
Do not end up like this man. Run!

18 Likes 3 Shares

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by DemonDestroyer: 2:47pm On May 05, 2015
Racist

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