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New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage - Family (16) - Nairaland

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Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Moana(f): 9:37am On May 13, 2015
slimmy05:
Yes, your face me I murder you thatched house, you piglet. This is why I say you're broke sluut. I won't repeat myself again. I am not your mate.
no its just that im not as broke as you i can actually afford annual payments without a problem.l m sure u are over 35 and you have flatmates as well
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 9:41am On May 13, 2015
Moana:
no its just that im not as broke as you i can actually afford annual payments without a problem.l m sure u are over 35 and you have flatmates as well
is that the profile of your best suitors? Get outta here sluut. We are not on same lane, even if you increase the dic.ks you ride.
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Moana(f): 9:46am On May 13, 2015
slimmy05:
is that the profile of your best suitors? Get outta here sluut. We are not on same lane, even if you increase the dic.ks you ride.
i agree with you we are not in the same lane. Riding di.cks....hmmm is that how she makes child support out of u? cheesy i definitely dont mess around with niggas like you and i thank God for it grin

1 Like

Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 9:47am On May 13, 2015
Moana:
i agree with you we are not in the same lane. Riding di.cks....hmmm is that how she makes child support out of u? cheesy
Good I've done making you expose your clear stupidity. You all don't even have what it takes, but always want to rant. Try and et a life for yourself.
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Moana(f): 9:51am On May 13, 2015
grin next time face your own lane

Going back to the topic.
If keeping her father's surname does not affect the marriage relationship then it shouldnt be made a big deal.
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Hollamydey(f): 9:59am On May 13, 2015
Why d insult? Its d single females in ur household that would nt get husbands, big idiolt.
woski417:
Idiot. You no go even see husband marry. Mumu
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 10:27am On May 13, 2015
Its nothing new. Women have been bearing their fathers' surnames alone and with husbands' names together and heaven has not fallen since then. So? Peeps using the 'Bride price' as a logic make me laugh. It shows they see women as cows or properties with no rights over their identity that can be bought or sold. No wonder domestic abuse is easy in this part of the world. Just imagine being married to a man who believes he can use bride price to get rid of your surname. See mentality!! In other words you have no right to your identity until you are married as a woman. Chai! Nigerian women are in soup if men like these are the only ones in nigeria.

2 Likes

Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by igbizen(m): 12:36pm On May 13, 2015
Thank God I don marry and my wife understood marriage and took my surname. This is the end time, anything that will bring confusion is wat the devil brings as ideas to men and its always on marriage; Becos that is the point you either get tins rite or wrong in any society, first of all them bring same sex marriage we no gree, Na this one. Wen a woman gets married, she changes Dad, so the surname is part of the symbols. Father means source and sustainer. wen you get married as a woman your source and sustainer becomes your husband. that is why the man is referred to as infidel wen he cannot sustain what he has sourced.
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by micktoxin(m): 12:45pm On May 13, 2015
Chiam55:


No not at all.... i was talking husband and wife. It's not everybody's tradition to wear a ring and take husband's name. The women in my fams keep their father's name.

The man gets his children they are his "properties"

Me grin I'm my famz " property"
In terms of ideologies & philosophies, I am as progressive and forward thinking as they come. But I have to admit I find your comments about marriage 'being a slave' astonishing. All arguments about ring and name changing aside.
In the same context, there is no point of getting married and spending £30k on ceremony, like my friend did in january. Let's face it, if you are progressive enough to think wearing wedding rings and changing names doesn't make you any more committed, then you must also accept marriage is pointless.
The difference between marriage and gf/bf relationship are rings, Mrs tag, and a glorified certificate.
My question is without the first two, why bother getting married? Btw, where are you from? You don't come across Nigerian nor look it, unless you are hybrid like me grin

3 Likes

Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by igbizen(m): 12:58pm On May 13, 2015
Sophyrocks:
Its nothing new. Women have been bearing their fathers' surnames alone and with husbands' names together and heaven has not fallen since then. So? Peeps using the 'Bride price' as a logic make me laugh. It shows they see women as cows or properties with no rights over their identity that can be bought or sold. No wonder domestic abuse is easy in this part of the world. Just imagine being married to a man who believes he can use bride price to get rid of your surname. See mentality!! In other words you have no right to your identity until you are married as a woman. Chai! Nigerian women are in soup if men like these are the only ones in nigeria.

I wonder if the OTHER PART of the world pays bride price or do traditional marriages 2) if they are the ones telling us that same sex lovers is sane. 3) If you can marry somebody that is young enough to be Ur son that is if you are a woman. please just remove the other part of the world wen it comes to marriage. they don't have rite ...lollllllllllll
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Graccccccccy(f): 2:14pm On May 13, 2015
*moi opinion* dnt think its wrong inasmuch as d husband and wife reaches an agreement... It isnt bad.... As 4 me, even if am asked 2 add my father's name.. Wey d space dey??
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 2:16pm On May 13, 2015
netizenbuzz:


Y must u always compare urself to the white man? Wat kind of slave mentality is this? There was nothing like surname in our culture b4 sef, so y r u giving urself unnecessary headache?
Head? Do you even know what it means to be the head of a home? Me thinks not. You think it's all about bringing in the cash and being waited upon tooth and nail? Or you think it's about your wife bearing your name or always having the last say? Me thinks not. Can you stay up through the night just to pray for your family? Can you starve just for your family to eat? (most men I know are served their food first before even worrying about the kids). Will you willing lose your life before you allow any member of your family drop a pint of blood? Most men today want the tilte of being the head of the home without the responsibility that comes with it. When the responsibilty comes, they push it to wife. She's a woman anyway, it's her duty to keep the home. See how Jesus lead the church and see all the sacrifices that came with it then search yourself again if you actually deserve to be called the head of your home.
My dear feminist or not, if you think surname=being the head, then I honestly don't know of you o.
Good you use Christ to buttress your point,He is the Head that's why we called CHRISTians. Madam/oga I do know what's it means to be a head,I know my place as a Man,a lover and a partner... And I'm sure you prolly didn't get my message. Feminism,male chauvinism are all perversion. Not taking your mans name is a sign unsubmissiveness,its marriage you must totally in or totally out.. But different strokes for different folks
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by mommyice: 2:40pm On May 13, 2015
shoo! western civilization, what can we say?
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 2:58pm On May 13, 2015
precisionindepth:
when a lady expresses her mind , she becomesba feminist..smh for some men
cheesy
I only asked her if she was a feminist to determine how I would phrase my question. Feminists tend to be very touchy about subjects like this. As you would see from our subsequent posts. I do believe that not all women who express themselves are feminists because that would be absurd. But some women think that men are oppressors that they must fight and conquer. And that is where the problems start from.
Abeg no label me bad Mouth o grin grin
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 4:32pm On May 13, 2015
I hear ya.... Imho marriage is pointless because nothing changes, other than your income being £30k shorter, life goes on. I support those who want to enslave another human by either buying their identity and putting a chain on the finger that leads to one's heart or spending their life's ownings buying a human lol. The joke part being you wasted your money. It's the children it affects the most. Natures marriage is procreation. I'm not 4rm Naija no but I'm the best of two worlds grin grin




micktoxin:

In terms of ideologies & philosophies, I am as progressive and forward thinking as they come. But I have to admit I find your comments about marriage 'being a slave' astonishing. All arguments about ring and name changing aside.
In the same context, there is no point of getting married and spending £30k on ceremony, like my friend did in january. Let's face it, if you are progressive enough to think wearing wedding rings and changing names doesn't make you any more committed, then you must also accept marriage is pointless.
The difference between marriage and gf/bf relationship are rings, Mrs tag, and a glorified certificate.
My question is without the first two, why bother getting married? Btw, where are you from? You don't come across Nigerian nor look it, unless you are hybrid like me grin
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 4:43pm On May 13, 2015
Gaidenk:

Good you use Christ to buttress your point,He is the Head that's why we called CHRISTians. Madam/oga I do know what's it means to be a head,I know my place as a Man,a lover and a partner... And I'm sure you prolly didn't get my message. Feminism,male chauvinism are all perversion. Not taking your mans name is a sign unsubmissiveness,its marriage you must totally in or totally out.. But different strokes for different folks

Like I said, that is how YOU inteprete unsubmissiveness. Male chauvinism is perversion you say? Then why is your wife taking your name such a big deal to you if you are really not chauvinistic? Don't hide under the cloak of different strokes for different folks. You were already judging women who wanted to keep their fathers' name.
About your all or nothing marriage ideology, it is kind of funny to me. The bible says "a man shall leave his father and his mother and cling to his wife". You people have changed it to a woman shall leave her mother and father and cling to her husband". If you want her to bear your name so much, then let her bear your name not your father's. Your children are at least named after you and not after her parents. You don't own your wife. And like I also stated earlier, surname was never part of the African culture.
What exactly do you mean by the submission you all are always screaming sef? If you mean respect then every human deserves respect in the first place including your children so it is not a one way traffic. Even God respected Abel and his offering in the bible. God didn't stop being God because of that. If what you mean by submission is more than respect, then you are really a chauvinist.

2 Likes 2 Shares

Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 4:44pm On May 13, 2015
Teempakguy:
cheesy
I only asked her if she was a feminist to determine how I would phrase my question. Feminists tend to be very touchy about subjects like this. As you would see from our subsequent posts. I do believe that not all women who express themselves are feminists because that would be absurd. But some women think that men are oppressors that they must fight and conquer. And that is where the problems start from.
Abeg no label me bad Mouth o grin grin

Bad mouth angry

Feminism was a title well aft it's existence, let me explain, the fight came about in a society where injustice existed. In parts of Africa for thousands of years women ran the world and they still run the world, let me explain, the feminist was called the cunning fox in the beginning, when the husband goes to work and gives his paycheck to the woman to only get an allowance. Those women were are our mothers and sisters. That's feminism right there. When men took the jobs and the paycheck and the fvckk law and forgot to share is when felines felt the need to share. You see the lions that's hw nature works. Sharing is caring grin
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 4:50pm On May 13, 2015
*Standing ovations* wink coolsimples

netizenbuzz:


Like I said, that is how YOU inteprete unsubmissiveness. Male chauvinism is perversion you say? Then why is your wife taking your name such a big deal to you if you are really not chauvinistic? Don't hide under the cloak of different strokes for different folks. You were already judging women who wanted to keep their fathers' name.
About your all or nothing marriage ideology, it is kind of funny to me. The bible says "a man shall leave his father and his mother and cling to his wife". You people have changed it to a woman shall leave her mother and father and cling to her husband". If you want her to bear your name so much, then let her bear your name not your father's. Your children are at least named after you and not after her parents. You don't own your wife. And like I also stated earlier, surname was never part of the African culture.
What exactly do you mean by the submission you all are always screaming sef? If you mean respect then every human deserves respect in the first place including your children so it is not a one way traffic. Even God respected Abel and his offering in the bible. God didn't stop being God because of that. If what you mean by submission is more than respect, then you are really a chauvinist.

1 Like

Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by tpiadotcom: 4:52pm On May 13, 2015
In traditional African (Nigerian) culture, the woman goes by her husband's first name (ie, wife of somebody, not wife of somebody's father/grandfather/patriarch), and after that she is called by her children's names. The practice of taking on the family surname is a western tradition which was introduced to Nigeria, not saying anything's wrong with it though.

Nairalanders like to copy western culture in a very uncivilized way, that's why you see them on nl insulting women/their origins/their ancestors at every opportunity they get, parroting breast and buttocks 24/7 then expecting to be taken seriously by these same women, in short, just no sense of direction at all since they are ignorant of what it means to be manly.
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 5:02pm On May 13, 2015
Chiam55:


Bad mouth angry

Feminism was a title well aft it's existence, let me explain, the fight came about in a society where injustice existed. In parts of Africa for thousands of years women ran the world and they still run the world, let me explain, the feminist was called the cunning fox in the being, when the husband goes to work and gives his paycheck to the woman to only get an allowance. Those women were are our mothers and sisters. That's feminism right there. When men took the jobs and the paycheck and the fvckk law and forgot to share is when felines felt the need to share. You see the lions that's hw nature works. Sharing is caring grin
er . . . How does this relate to the topic on ground? Also, felines? Wtf?! Also, the man gives or the man gets? Also, women run the world? Then why does feminism exist? Shouldn't there be masculinism instead? Also, cunning fox . . . I did not get that reference. So, if you would care to elaborate . . . This time in universally accepted english, i'm all ears
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 5:16pm On May 13, 2015
netizenbuzz:


Like I said, that is how YOU inteprete unsubmissiveness. Male chauvinism is perversion you say? Then why is your wife taking your name such a big deal to you if you are really not chauvinistic? Don't hide under the cloak of different strokes for different folks. You were already judging women who wanted to keep their fathers' name.
About your all or nothing marriage ideology, it is kind of funny to me. The bible says "a man shall leave his father and his mother and cling to his wife". You people have changed it to a woman shall leave her mother and father and cling to her husband". If you want her to bear your name so much, then let her bear your name not your father's. Your children are at least named after you and not after her parents. You don't own your wife. And like I also stated earlier, surname was never part of the African culture.
What exactly do you mean by the submission you all are always screaming sef? If you mean respect then every human deserves respect in the first place including your children so it is not a one way traffic. Even God respected Abel and his offering in the bible. God didn't stop being God because of that. If what you mean by submission is more than respect, then you are really a chauvinist.
so what you are saying in essence is, in marriage, you won't change your surname. Right?
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 5:17pm On May 13, 2015
Teempakguy:
er . . . How does this relate to the topic on ground? Also, felines? Wtf?! Also, the man gives or the man gets? Also, women run the world? Then why does feminism exist? Shouldn't there be masculinism instead? Also, cunning fox . . . I did not get that reference. So, if you would care to elaborate . . . This time in universally accepted english, i'm all ears

The cunning fox is the Asian woman who walks behind her husband. Do you know why she does that because she is weighed down by that heavy paycheck she's carrying.
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 6:59pm On May 13, 2015
netizenbuzz:


Like I said, that is how YOU inteprete unsubmissiveness. Male chauvinism is perversion you say? Then why is your wife taking your name such a big deal to you if you are really not chauvinistic? Don't hide under the cloak of different strokes for different folks. You were already judging women who wanted to keep their fathers' name.
About your all or nothing marriage ideology, it is kind of funny to me. The bible says "a man shall leave his father and his mother and cling to his wife". You people have changed it to a woman shall leave her mother and father and cling to her husband". If you want her to bear your name so much, then let her bear your name not your father's. Your children are at least named after you and not after her parents. You don't own your wife. And like I also stated earlier, surname was never part of the African culture.
What exactly do you mean by the submission you all are always screaming sef? If you mean respect then every human deserves respect in the first place including your children so it is not a one way traffic. Even God respected Abel and his offering in the bible. God didn't stop being God because of that. If what you mean by submission is more than respect, then you are really a chauvinist.
From your argument i can draw that you female,aii then,madam if you never marry when you wan marry insist of keeping your father name ko,if the nigger accepts it ok then, we cool smiley ?
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by micktoxin(m): 7:03pm On May 13, 2015
Chiam55:
I hear ya.... Imho marriage is pointless because nothing changes, other than your income being £30k shorter, life goes on. I support those who want to enslave another human by either buying their identity and putting a chain on the finger that leads to one's heart or spending their life's ownings buying a human lol. The joke part being you wasted your money. It's the children it affects the most. Natures marriage is procreation. I'm not 4rm Naija no but I'm the best of two worlds grin grin




I lean towards your perspective about marriage, but still wouldn't go as far as calling those who get married as being enslaved. Most people, especially ladies tend to demand a form of symbolic commitment to show you are just not using them as children factory.
Marriage can be termed a slavery if the actions were not consensual between both adults.
Not proposing in the traditional way and giving rings is a deal breaker for most European and African girls, so it's not like it was against their wishes.
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by micktoxin(m): 7:10pm On May 13, 2015
Chiam55:
I hear ya.... Imho marriage is pointless because nothing changes, other than your income being £30k shorter, life goes on. I support those who want to enslave another human by either buying their identity and putting a chain on the finger that leads to one's heart or spending their life's ownings buying a human lol. The joke part being you wasted your money. It's the children it affects the most. Natures marriage is procreation. I'm not 4rm Naija no but I'm the best of two worlds grin grin

Btw, what's your ideal type of relationship In the context of commitment and boundaries. Surely, I can tell you want certain freedom. I want your personal answers and not the ultra liberal clichés Lol.
*Scratching head while thinking of your nationality* you are Partly english and south african. In which case, that explains your dimples cheesy
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 7:34pm On May 13, 2015
Ok I'd admit calling marriage slavery might be an exaggeration but then I'm anti keeping Pets.

So I will respect the communion. Whether you do it under the stars and a tree or you loud out at the Hilton it's the promises made that remains the same since the dawn of man. Those promise are often forgotten when money and material get involved.

As for the part you say bout women wanting more than being a "bby factor" that made me laugh because that just ozzz irony when your familiar with the term baby mamas.





micktoxin:


I lean towards your perspective about marriage, but still wouldn't go as far as calling those who get married as being enslaved. Most people, especially ladies tend to demand a form of symbolic commitment to show you are just not using them as children factory.
Marriage can be termed a slavery if the actions were not consensual between both adults.
Not proposing in the traditional way and giving rings is a deal breaker for most European and African girls, so it's not like it was against their wishes.
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by igbizen(m): 8:47pm On May 13, 2015
Sophyrocks:
Its nothing new. Women have been bearing their fathers' surnames alone and with husbands' names together and heaven has not fallen since then. So? Peeps using the 'Bride price' as a logic make me laugh. It shows they see women as cows or properties with no rights over their identity that can be bought or sold. No wonder domestic abuse is easy in this part of the world. Just imagine being married to a man who believes he can use bride price to get rid of your surname. See mentality!! In other words you have no right to your identity until you are married as a woman. Chai! Nigerian women are in soup if men like these are the only ones in nigeria.
shm
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by igbizen(m): 9:01pm On May 13, 2015
very hypocritical set of ppl. I dear all dem poor girls who will want to add their surname to that of dangote. Dey will be like I am mrs Dangote; they will even forget their first Name. lolll
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Ihuomadinihu: 8:01am On May 14, 2015
Don't know what to say about this issue. But i can speak for the old Igbo tradition,where married ladies didn't change their names after marriage. Surname and change of Maiden name started after the coming of the white men. People were identified based on their Father's first name,husband's first name,occupation and Children's name. Women usually retained their Father's name,even in the rural areas,you will hear a woman call her name while referring herself as a daughter of somebody instead of a wife of somebody.
For example, Akwaeke is the daughter of Ude and gets married to Eze. She is Akwaeke,the daughter of Ude and not Akwaeke Eze. After having a kid she becomes, Akwaeke,Nne Nwaugo. She doesn't really change her name.
In the modern times,women keep their Father's name when they come from influential families like Ngozi Okonjo etc. They will just hyphenate and add their husbands' name. In other cases,it's optional,a woman might just keep it cos she is emotionally attached to the name.
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by precisionindepth: 9:33am On May 14, 2015
Teempakguy:
cheesy
I only asked her if she was a feminist to determine how I would phrase my question. Feminists tend to be very touchy about subjects like this. As you would see from our subsequent posts. I do believe that not all women who express themselves are feminists because that would be absurd. But some women think that men are oppressors that they must fight and conquer. And that is where the problems start from.
Abeg no label me bad Mouth o grin grin
OK, but most men r oppressors for real.
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by Nobody: 11:24am On May 14, 2015
precisionindepth:
OK, but most men r oppressors for real.
[size=16pt]Whatever seems real to you is whatever you believe to be real. Whatever you feel, is what you allow yourself to feel.[/size]
Re: New Craze In Town- Ladies Retaining Their Fathers Name After Marriage by precisionindepth: 11:39am On May 14, 2015
Teempakguy:

[size=16pt]Whatever seems real to you is whatever you believe to be real. Whatever you feel, is what you allow yourself to feel.[/size]
nice

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